


best thing that's ever been mine

by HeartshapedMusicBox



Category: Karlie Kloss - Fandom, Taylor Swift (Musician)
Genre: F/F, kaylor - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-21
Updated: 2017-03-25
Packaged: 2018-05-02 17:42:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 42
Words: 104,326
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5257727
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HeartshapedMusicBox/pseuds/HeartshapedMusicBox
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"I'm so tired of hiding, Karlie. I've been standing in front of so many people these past few months, telling them that they are worth more than the opinions of others, that they are brave and can get through anything, and I just... I don't want to be afraid of what the public will say about us anymore. I don't want to hide this, you, us. You're the best thing that's ever happened to me and I want to share that with the world."</p><p>Flash forward and Taylor and Karlie are taking on the world together.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

It’s early in the morning on Taylor’s birthday and Karlie wakes up from a loud thump, followed by someone crawling across the bed. Before she can even wake up enough to form any coherent thoughts, soft lips kiss her forehead.

“I’m so tired and I stink of airplanes,” Taylor says exhaustedly, and drops her head face-down onto her pillow.

Karlie laughs and rolls over, pulling Taylor closer towards her. “Welcome home, baby,” she whispers into Taylor’s ear. “I missed you.”

Taylor moves her head so Karlie can look into those beautiful blue eyes. “I missed you too,” Taylor says and Karlie leans in to kiss Taylor’s nose. “Aren’t you forgetting something?” Taylor says, mockingly and Karlie laughs.

“All in good time, birthday girl. Do you want it now or do you want to get some sleep first?”

“Give me like two hours,” Taylor replies sleepily, turns around and falls asleep almost immediately.

***

Karlie walks around Taylor’s LA house, getting everything ready for when Taylor wakes up. She knows by now that Taylor needs a few hours in bed after long international flights if she wants to be able to function properly, and Karlie plans on using those hours well.

The night before, Karlie had baked cookies and a birthday cake, gone shopping for the party they would have later on, and made sure the two presents she was giving Taylor were ready to be given.

  
She makes her way to the kitchen and starts preparing the chocolate pancakes she wants to surprise Taylor with when she wakes up. The batter ready, she leaves it in the fridge while she finds the birthday decorations she has stored in one of the guest rooms she knew Taylor wouldn’t look in before coming to bed. After hanging them up all over the house, from the kitchen and all the way to the bedroom where Taylor is sound asleep, she quietly opens the door and sneaks in.

 _Alright,_ Karlie thinks to herself, _only one more thing…_

She looks around, trying to think where Taylor would have left her phone. Spotting her purse on the floor next to the bed, she finds the phone quickly. She enters the passcode Taylor trusted her with almost a year ago already and sneaks back out of the room with the phone in her hand. Now she just needs to plug it into the laptop before Taylor wakes up.

***

Karlie lies in bed next to Taylor, her eyes caressing the sleeping girl lovingly.

“You’re doing it again,” Taylor suddenly mumbles, her eyes still closed.

“Doing what?” she asks with a grin.

“Looking at me with those heart-eyes of yours,” Taylor replies, “I can feel it, you know.”

Karlie giggles as Taylor stretches with a smile on her face. Taylor’s hand grabs Karlie’s and pulls her close.

“You smell like pancakes,” Taylor says before she places her lips on Karlie’s, kissing her greedily.

“Birthday surprise,” Karlie mumbles in between kisses.

Taylor pulls away slowly, her teeth playfully biting Karlie’s bottom lip in the process. “Then what in the world are we still doing here? Let’s go eat them!”

Taylor’s eyes shine as she all but jumps out of bed, and Karlie groans. “Fine,” she says with a playful pout, “but don’t for a second think I won’t make you pay for this later.”

Her green eyes twinkle with mischief and Taylor giggles. “Don’t worry,” she says, “I’m counting on it.”

***

Before Taylor walks into the kitchen, Karlie stops her. “Wait here,” she says and disappears into the kitchen for a minute.

When she comes back out, she’s wearing a birthday hat and holds one for Taylor in her hand. “Put it on,” she says and Taylor laughs as she does as she’s told. Karlie takes her hand and leads her into the kitchen.

  
“HAPPY BIRTHDAY,” she shouts excitedly as Taylor looks around at the streamers and the balloons and the stack of pancakes with a candle sitting neatly in the middle.

“This is amazing,” Taylor says and embraces her girlfriend happily before sitting down, ready to dig into the delicious pancakes. Karlie lights the candle and waits for Taylor to make a silent wish before blowing it out. Before joining Taylor at the table, she walks to one of the kitchen cupboards and takes out a small present and Taylor’s phone.

As she puts them down in front of Taylor, Taylor looks at her suspiciously. “Why do you have my phone?”

Karlie lets out a small laugh. “Open it and see.”

Taylor enters her passcode quickly and is met by two new icons on her home screen. She shoots Karlie a quizzical look. “Open ‘How You Get The Girl’ first,” Karlie says, urging her along.

A simple 8-bit melody version of Taylor’s own song starts playing as the words “play now” appear. Taylor beams at her. “What is this?” she asks excitedly.

“Click it and you’ll see!” Karlie says and watches as her girlfriend clicks it and a short tutorial takes over the screen.

“Okay, swiping moves things away, got it.” Taylor says, concentrating on the game.

As Taylor moves on from the tutorial, a blonde, red-lipped character appears. Taylor looks at Karlie with surprised eyes. “Is this me?” she asks and Karlie nods, the smile on her face showing no signs of leaving.

She watches as her girlfriend maneuvers her character down a street, swiping away paparazzi, crazy fans, and various celebrity men. Taylor squeals in delight when she finishes the first level by getting her mini-me into a building. A door opens and another blonde character comes out of a door, walks over to mini-Taylor and kisses her. “No way! That is amazing,” Taylor says excitedly. “Where did you find it?”

  
“I made it,” Karlie says with a blush as Taylor’s mouth practically falls open.

“You WHAT?” she squeals and wraps her arms around Karlie’s neck, kissing her passionately.

“Okay, I had some help, but I did most of it!”

“What about the other app?” Taylor asks after taking a few bites of her pancakes.

“Before I can show you that one, you need to open this,” Karlie says, pointing to the small present lying in front of Taylor. Taylor excitedly rips the paper off and finds a small projector suitable for her iPhone. She looks over at Karlie, who promptly starts explaining.

“It needs to charge first, but once connected you just aim it towards a wall and voila, projector!” She grins, leaving out the explanation for the other app for as long as possible.

“…and?” Taylor finally asks.

“And… I’ll show you.”

Karlie leaves the kitchen for a moment before she walks back in with a similar projector in her hand. Hooking it up to Taylor’s phone, she points it towards the wall before she clicks the app. Taylor watches her intensely as the app boots up to the words “Who do you miss?” She hands the phone back to Taylor. “Answer the question,” she tells her with a nod towards the phone.

“Olivia,” Taylor says without missing a beat, and absolutely nothing happens.

“You might want to say it to the phone and not me,” Karlie says with a wink and Taylor tries again.

“Olivia.”

Shortly after, a short video of Olivia is being projected onto the wall from the portable projector. Taylor gasps and they watch the video in silence.

“Try one more,” Karlie says, “use my name.”

Taylor obeys and a video on Karlie pops up on the wall.

“Try my name again.” A different video of Karlie appears as Karlie glances over at her girlfriend. Taylor looks absolutely stunned, tears brimming in her eyes.

“Do you know how much I have needed that this past year?” she whispers, clearly struggling to keep her voice level. “Do you know how many times I wished I could see you when I was away, when we both were away?” Taylor grabs hold of Karlie’s shoulders and pulls her into a hug.

Karlie strokes Taylor’s hair and whispers “I know, baby, I know,” just holding her until she’s ready to let go. Looking directly at her, Karlie brings a hand up to Taylor’s face and wipes her tears.

“No crying on your birthday, okay?” she says and gives Taylor a gentle kiss. “Now, did you like your presents?”

Taylor has to laugh at the hopeful grin on Karlie’s face. “They are the best presents I have ever gotten. Thank you.”

“You can thank me later,” Karlie suggests with a wink.

***

Karlie is in the kitchen and has just finished cleaning up when she hears the water from the shower turn off. She makes her way to the bathroom and knocks on the door.

“Hold on,” Taylor says and Karlie waits for a few seconds until Taylor opens the door for her. “Come in quick, it’s freezing out there.”

Karlie halts by the door, taking in the sight of the naked girl in front of her.

“You’re doing it again,” Taylor teases.

“I know,” Karlie murmurs. “I can’t help it, you’re just so beautiful.”

“Like I could ever measure up to you, miss Supermodel.”

Karlie laughs and makes her way across the room towards Taylor. “I think you’re either underestimating your beauty or overestimating mine,” she replies huskily and traces her hand down Taylor’s back before letting it stop on her butt.

Turning her around, she kisses her greedily, pinning Taylor up against the bathroom counter. She lets her hands run up and down Taylor’s sides, feeling the goosebumps that erupt all over the naked girl’s body. Karlie’s mouth breaks away from Taylor’s and moves south, her tongue lightly grazing Taylor’s jaw, neck and chest with each kiss. A shiver runs down Taylor’s spine as Karlie’s hand moves from her side to her stomach, those long fingers making their way down towards Taylor’s legs before going back up again.

“Tease,” Taylor says with a smile, bringing Karlie’s face back up to her own. She kisses her intensely, her whole body tense with lust and longing for Karlie’s, and starts pushing her towards the door. Breaking away from their kiss, she grabs hold on Karlie’s t-shirt and pulls it over her head before dropping it on the floor. Grabbing Karlie’s hand, she swiftly leads her to the bedroom where she pushes her down on the mattress. In a singular motion she removes Karlie’s pants and lies down on top of her, her lips caressing Karlie’s. Her hand quickly finds its place in between Karlie’s legs. As her hand moves in slow and steady motions, Karlie moans and soon her body arches as she comes. Taylor gives her a final kiss on the lips and lies down next to her.

“I thought it was your birthday today, not mine” Karlie pants as she recovers, her hand absently stroking Taylor’s thigh.

“What can I say?” Taylor smirks, “I missed you a lot while I was away.”

“I gathered as much,” Karlie says with a chuckle and rolls over. Pinning Taylor under her own body, she starts kissing her.

“God, you weigh a lot,” Taylor moans in between kisses.

“No, I don’t, and just for that I’m going to stay here even longer and attack you with kisses.”

Taylor laughs and squirms playfully in an attempt to get Karlie off of her, but Karlie persists. She places her soft lips all over Taylor’s body, spending extra time on her breasts, playfully biting her nipples until Taylor lets out a soft moan, before moving on to her stomach.

Repositioning herself, she lets her lips move further downwards, teasing Taylor by kissing the insides of her thighs before finally placing them where Taylor really wants them.

“Happy birthday, baby,” she whispers huskily before letting her tongue work its magic.

It’s not long until Taylor squirms underneath her, softly whimpering as Karlie brings her to a finish. Karlie stretches her long body out next to Taylor’s and kisses her hungrily, once, twice, before settling in for a cuddle.

“Wow,” Taylor whispers, her heart still thumping loudly away in her chest. She rests her head on Karlie’s chest with a smile.

“Do you want to take a nap?” Karlie whispers to her and Taylor just nods in confirmation before she quickly drifts off to sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

Karlie wakes up and checks the time. _Shit,_ she thinks to herself when she realizes they have slept too long. She shakes Taylor slightly in an attempt to wake her. 

“Hey babe, you have to wake up now, princess.” She alternates between kissing, shaking and poking Taylor until she sees those gorgeous blue eyes peek up at her.

“Hey there…” she coos and kisses Taylor’s nose.

“I don’t want to be awake,” Taylor mutters with a yawn.

“I know, baby, but it’s party time soon!” Karlie attempts to leave the bed but Taylor grabs onto her hand and pulls her back in.

“Stay with me, just for a few minutes.” Her sleepy eyes are pleading with Karlie and Karlie caves. 

“Okay,” she says, “but only for a few minutes. We need to at least have clothes on when the guests arrive.” 

Once Karlie has settled down next to her in bed, Taylor stares into Karlie’s green eyes, a thoughtful look on Taylor’s face. 

“What’s up, darling?” Karlie asks, puzzled by Taylor’s facial expression and Taylor hesitates. 

“I’ve been thinking…” she finally replies, but her voice trails off and she stops.

Karlie feels her heart thump in her chest, a sudden nervousness creeping up from the pit of her stomach.

“What have you been thinking?” she asks, her voice not much more than a whisper. _What is going on?_ she thinks, feeling like her thoughts are zooming around in her head much faster than she can deal with.

Taylor stares at her and gives her a guarded smile. 

“I think I want us to go public.” 

“You think WHAT?” Karlie yells. “Are you aware of how much fear I just felt? I thought it was something way worse!”

Taylor lets out a small chuckle and squeezes Karlie’s hand.

“Sorry…” she says and gives Karlie a long but gentle kiss. 

“Tell me what has changed your mind though,” Karlie says, knowing the decision can’t have been easy for Taylor to make. 

“It’s just… I’m so tired of hiding, Karlie. I’ve been standing in front of so many people these past few months, telling them that they are worth more than the opinions of others, that they are brave and can get through anything, and I just… I don’t want to be afraid of what the public will say about us anymore. I don’t want to hide this, you, us. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me and I want to share that with the world. I want to be able to take you places without worrying about what everyone will say.”

Karlie can feel tears forming in her eyes, but her face is a giant smile as she pulls Taylor towards her and envelops her in a hug.

“Are you sure you are ready to do this?” she asks.

“Honestly, I don’t think I’m ready to do it right this second,” Taylor replies, “I think I need to disappear from the spotlight for a while first, let the break clear the waters around me for a little while. I just want to be able to be myself, and a part of that is being open about who I love. I don’t think I can bear keeping up appearances with Adam for much longer when all I really want to do is show the world that I love you, and only you.”

“I love you too,” Karlie says with a smile. “Speaking of Adam, though, don’t you need to call him about the party tonight? And about the next few days? Not that I really want him near you but don't you need to be seen together soon now that you're back?

“Ugh, don’t remind me,” Taylor replies. “I’ll deal with him later.”

“Okay,” Karlie responds, “and I’m proud of you.”

“Thanks,” Taylor says before asking “Are you ready to go public with me?”

Karlie lets out a short laugh. “Yes, Taylor, I’ve been ready since we got together.”

“Are you okay with waiting a bit more?” Taylor looks at her with sincere eyes.

“Of course, honey,” Karlie replies and leans in for another kiss. “I want you to be ready and I’ll wait until you are.”

***

Karlie leaves Taylor in bed while she showers. While the water runs down her body, she thinks back to the conversation she just had with Taylor. It would be so nice if Taylor could drop the charade with Adam right away, if they could go outside together and hold hands, kiss on the sidewalk in broad daylight and just not care what people would say or think or do. But Taylor’s life has never been easy and Karlie knows all too well that Taylor can’t just drop a bomb like this on the world while it is still so hyper-focused on her, so obsessed with her every move. She’s spent too much time building her empire into the powerhouse that it is for it to fall and crumble into pieces by revealing too much too soon, ruining everything she's worked so hard for just because she's tired. Karlie knows it will take preparation, some kind of carefully crafted strategy, even though she hates that it does. Knowing that Taylor actually wants to come out gives her strength, and Karlie will be patient for Taylor’s sake, but part of her still wishes they could make the announcement right away.

Turning off the shower, Karlie sighs and steps out into the cooler air.

Opening the door, she calls out. “Hey babe, are you awake?”

“I’m awake,” Taylor replies, “and I’m about to call Adam. I don’t know what to say to him though.”

“I’m sure you can come up with something. Words are kind of your thing.”

Taylor chuckles at that. “That is true.”

“Put the conversation on speaker so I can hear it too,” Karlie says just as she’s walking into Taylor’s bedroom, completely naked. Taylor can’t take her eyes off of her for a second.

“Right. Calling Adam,” she says distractedly, forcing her gaze away from Karlie, much to her girlfriend’s amusement. “Stay quiet, okay? I don’t want him to know you’re listening in.”

Karlie just nods, narrowing her eyes in mock seriousness. 

Taylor scowls at her as the ring-back tone chimes from the phone.

“Hey, it’s Taylor,” Taylor says as Adam picks up the phone.

“Hey there, beautiful,” he says. Taylor rolls her eyes and Karlie has to bite her bottom lip to keep herself from laughing. 

“So, um…” Taylor starts, her mind trying to find the appropriate words for this conversation. “As you know, it’s my birthday today…”

“Oh, yeah. Of course, I knew that – happy birthday!” 

Karlie mouths “What an idiot” in the background and Taylor nods, struggling not to laugh.

“…thanks. And my party is tonight and I just wanted to let you know that you don’t need to come because everyone there knows about me and Karlie.” 

“Right. Uh... yeah, alright,” he says disappointedly, and Karlie shoots Taylor a look. She feels a little sorry for the guy, even though he knew perfectly well what he was getting into when they made their little arrangement.

Taylor, however, just continues. “Also, I guess now that I’m back in the country, we should be seen together somewhere. Do you mind meeting up for lunch tomorrow?” 

“No, sure, I can do that.”

“Awesome,” Taylor replies, her voice full of fake enthusiasm. “I’ll text you the details later.”

“Sounds good.”

“Alright, well, that’s settled then. Got to go. Bye!” Taylor hangs up before he can reply.

***

Karlie has just gotten her sleek, turquoise dress on properly when she hears the knock on the front door. Taylor, not quite dressed yet, looks up at her with a panicked look on her face. 

“Shit,” she hisses, “someone’s here already.”

“I’ll get it,” Karlie says with a smile and makes her way to the door, seeing Taylor’s younger brother’s face smiling at her.

“Hey Karlie,” he says and leans in for a hug. “You look amazing!” 

Karlie blushes and thanks him, gesturing for him to come inside. Even after two years of being in Taylor’s life, her stomach still flutters every time someone in Taylor’s family compliments her.

“Help me with the cats?” Austin asks and hands Karlie Olivia’s carrier bag. 

“Hi baby,” she coos to Olivia, who meows back. Letting her out of the carrier, she scoops her up and cuddles her. “I’ve missed you.” Olivia just purrs back.

Austin lets Meredith out of her carrier and she immediately runs off to find a hiding place. 

“Hey loser, your favorite brother is here,” Austin yells out and winks to Karlie, who giggles.

“I figured it would be you,” she calls back. “Did you bring my babies?”

“Of course I did,” he replies. “Are you coming out here soon or not? If you aren’t, I might just have to start hitting on your super gorgeous model girlfriend who is standing right here in front of me in a beautiful dress. I don’t know if I can resist her beauty.”

“Don’t you DARE, Austin,” Taylor replies, and Karlie laughs. 

When Taylor finally emerges from the bedroom, wearing a short, black dress with sequins in the bottom half and intricate lace on the top half, Karlie gasps quietly. She can feel the blood rush to her cheeks as she takes in the sight of her beautiful girlfriend and silently curses the fact that Austin is there in the room with them. All Karlie wants to do right now is pin Taylor up against the wall and kiss her fiercely. 

“You’re staring,” Taylor says, bringing Karlie back to reality. 

“How can I not when you’re wearing that?” Karlie replies, a smirk on her face, and this time it is Taylor’s turn to blush. 

Karlie walks over to stand in front of her. Putting her hands gently on her face, she kisses her.

“Should I leave?” Austin asks and Taylor breaks away from the kiss. 

“No, don’t,” she replies, “I’m sure Karlie can keep it in her pants. Now, where are my babies?” Squeezing Karlie’s hand, she sends her a playful look before she walks away to find the cats. 

***

It is hours later and the house is full of friends. Taylor is sitting on Karlie’s lap in the corner of the couch, talking to Lily and Gigi, with a glass of wine in her hand. Karlie is absentmindedly stroking Taylor’s back, glad she can be openly affectionate towards her, when suddenly the conversation stops. Not having paid attention, she looks around, trying to figure out what’s been happening when she suddenly spots Adam. She glances at Taylor, hoping the birthday girl won’t get up from her lap. Taylor sighs loudly before greeting him with a small wave, but she stays on Karlie’s lap.

“Why is he here?” Taylor hisses in annoyance. “I told him not to come.”

“I swear he’s in love with you,” Lily replies, her voice hushed. 

“Yeah, that’s pretty clear,” Taylor says, “I can’t get rid of him. I never should have gotten involved in this whole ordeal.” 

Karlie squeezes Taylor’s shoulders. “Do you want me to go get rid of him?”

“No, it’s fine. Let him stay. I’ll just try to ignore him.”

“I have an idea as to how to get rid of him,” Gigi says.

“Oh?” Karlie replies, cocking her eyebrow.

“Just be all over each other,” Gigi continues. “He’ll be so uncomfortable, he’ll leave the party.”

Taylor laughs at that. “I suppose we could do that. I have no issues with being all over this one,” she teases, and leans in for a kiss, a kiss that lingers and continues until Karlie has to push her off of her. 

“I need more wine,” she says as an excuse, wiping her face, to which Taylor reaches down to the floor, getting the bottle and pouring Karlie another glass. She downs her own while she’s at it and refills it. Karlie takes the opportunity to send Gigi a look that says “gee, thanks for that” and Gigi just shrugs back. 

With a full glass in her hand, Taylor repositions herself on top of Karlie and puts her lips on Karlie’s once more. The sensation of Taylor’s soft lips gently massaging her own gives Karlie goosebumps, but the feeling of several pairs of eyes staring at them is uncomfortable. Breaking away from the kiss, she grabs Taylor’s hand and gives it a squeeze. “Contain yourself,” she says, a tint of redness in her cheeks. Taylor just smiles that sweet smile of hers and gives her an apologizing look. 

“I’ll be right back,” Taylor says and leaves Karlie’s lap. 

Karlie turns towards Gigi. “Why did you suggest that?” she asks embarrassedly. 

Gigi laughs. “I thought it would be fun! You guys are never all over each other at parties, I thought maybe it was time you had that experience.”

“It’s embarrassing!” Karlie whines.

“I didn’t actually expect Taylor to embrace the idea.” Gigi admits. “She’s always so careful when it comes to you two.”

“Yeah, well…” Karlie says, “I think you suggested it at the right time. She wants us to go public soon, she just told me.”

“What?” Lily gasps, delight on her face. “Are you serious?”

“Yeah, she’s tired of hiding. So am I. “

“When do you think you’ll do it?” Gigi asks.

“It won’t be right away. We need to have the media attention die down a bit first; she doesn’t want the media to run with it like rabid dogs. We’ll probably slowly introduce the idea to the world. I’m not quite sure, we haven’t discussed the details yet.”

Just as Gigi opens her mouth to give a reply, Taylor walks back into the room. “Who wants tequila?” she shouts excitedly, giving the bottle a shake. 

Karlie stares at her. She’s changed out of her black dress and into a black, sparkly skirt and a dark green crop top. The bottle of tequila looks half-full and Karlie is certain it was full this morning.

“Oh Taylor, what have you done?” she whispers to herself.

Taylor walks up to her and puts her free arm around Karlie’s waist, making them sway along to the music playing in the background.

“I want to do something fun,” Taylor whispers into her ear. “Body shots.”

“What? Body shots? No.” Karlie exclaims, shocked by the suggestion.

“Oh, come on, Karlie. Don’t be such a spoilsport.”

Taylor gives her a sloppy kiss on the cheek before she goes off to find shot glasses, the tequila bottle still stuck in her hand. 

“Fuck,” Karlie says under her breath. The girls standing around her just stare at her with eyes wide. 

“Body shots?” Gigi asks, almost as shocked as Karlie. “Wow. I definitely didn’t expect that.”

“Karlieeee,” Taylor calls from the other room. 

“I should… yeah,” she says, gesturing towards the other room and leaves with a sigh.

Entering the other room, Karlie finds Taylor lying flat on her back on top of the dining table. She has a shot glass of tequila in one hand and a wedge of lemon in the other, and there’s salt crystals spread out on her stomach. 

Karlie has to laugh. “You look ridiculous, Taylor.”

The older girl just giggles. “Shut up, loser, and come take a shot.”

Karlie hesitates and looks around. A few faces are looking in from the other room, but so far no one has made their way into the room. Karlie secretly hopes they’ll stay away until this is over and done with.

“Just so you know, I’m not totally cool with this,” Karlie says skeptically to Taylor and Taylor pouts.

“You’re boring,” she mutters, mocking her younger girlfriend.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever.” Karlie says. “So, how do I do this?”

“You lick the salt first, then you take the shot, and then you have to bite into the lemon afterwards.”

“Okay, sounds easy enough. Give me the shot glass.” Karlie reaches out her hand but Taylor just smiles and shakes her head.

“No,” she says teasingly as she places it inside of her belly button. “You have to pick it up with your mouth from there.”

“I hate you,” grumbles Karlie, “what if I knock it over?”

“Then you can just lick it off,” Taylor replies, a sly smile on her face. “And this?” She shows Karlie the lemon wedge. “That goes here.” She shoves it into her mouth.

“Oh God, you are the fucking worst.” 

Karlie hesitates for a second, not sure if she actually wants to do this. Taylor waves her hand, urging her on. Before she can change her mind, she leans down and licks Taylor’s stomach, grabs hold of the shot glass with her teeth and supports it with her hand as she throws her head back, emptying it. The burning sensation of tequila overcomes her for a brief second as she leans down towards Taylor’s mouth and lets her tongue graze Taylor’s lips for a short while before biting down on the lemon, their lips brushing against each other’s as she takes it from Taylor’s mouth. 

Her mind is spinning as she stands up, their friends cheering in the background, and she feels her cheeks flush red. Looking around, she can see the crowd that is standing around them and she suddenly feels very embarrassed. They can’t continue doing this tonight – once Taylor sobers up, she will end up regretting everything if Karlie doesn’t stop her right now. 

“Again!” Taylor says excitedly, already grabbing hold of another shot glass full of tequila. 

“Tay, don’t,” Karlie warns her. “Get up.”

Taylor puts the glass down and sits up. Karlie takes her hand and pulls her off of the table. “Come,” she says and leads her out of the room. Adam stands by the doorway, a pained look on his face. Karlie grabs his hand and pulls both of them with her upstairs to one of the guest rooms where they can speak more privately.

Once they are safely inside the room, she lets go of their hands and turns around to close the door. This is a conversation she doesn’t want anyone else to be privy to, and frankly, she shouldn’t have to be around for it either. She knows, however, that if she doesn’t force them to talk to each other right now, Adam will continue showing up to things like a lost puppy.

“You guys need to talk, right now,” she says sternly and sits down on the bed. 

Taylor and Adam stares at each other for a few minutes. Adam looks confused, his eyes darting around to the various pictures on the walls. Taylor, however, looks at him with annoyance. 

“Why are you here?” she finally asks him, her voice crasser than she probably intended.

“I don’t know,” he says slowly, “I wanted to?”

“Well, I told you not to come. You obviously showed up anyway. Why?”

“Maybe I just wanted to hang out.”

“With someone who has made it clear she doesn’t want to hang out with you?” Taylor’s eyes are full of anger, and Karlie knows it’s because of the alcohol. She wouldn’t have blown up like this if she had this conversation with him sober. 

“Okay, fine,” he finally says, “I like you. I wanted to show up and maybe get a chance to try to show you what a great catch I am.”

Taylor sends him a disgusted look, not impressed with his poor attempt at a joke. 

“You like me,” she snorts, “well, guess what, loverboy. Reality check, but I like her. I love her!” She gesticulates towards Karlie, and Karlie bites her lip in an attempt to stop herself from smiling.

“I know,” Adam mumbles and looks away.

“Look, this was a business agreement. You knew the terms going in, so why you would ever even consider going there is beyond me. But it has to stop, it has to stop now. I was going to talk to you about this during lunch, but I might as well mention it to you now: Karlie and I, we are going public sometime soon. I can’t keep up with this charade anymore.” Taylor goes quiet, and Karlie notices that she suddenly looks worn to the bone.

Adam looks around, clearly uncomfortable. “…I’ll just go.”

“Yeah,” Taylor says with a sigh, “you do that.”

He stands around for a few seconds, seemingly hesitant to leave.

As Adam opens the door to leave, Taylor walks over to the bed and sits down next to Karlie. She suddenly remembers the lunch date tomorrow. “Oh, and, Adam?”

He halts and turns around, looking at them. “Yeah?”

“Don’t forget about lunch tomorrow.”

Adam nods, turns around again and leaves.

Taylor leans towards Karlie, her head resting on Karlie’s shoulder as Karlie puts her arms around her. Turning towards her taller girlfriend, Taylor buries her face in Karlie’s chest. Karlie holds around her tightly as Taylor cries into her dress. “Shhhh,” she comforts her, occasionally stroking her hair and kissing the top of her head. “It will be okay.”


	3. Chapter 3

It is 3am when Karlie and Taylor finally crawl into bed. 

Once Adam had left the party and Taylor had dried her tears, the rest of the night had been a blast. No one had questioned their earlier behavior and much to Karlie’s surprise, a bunch of the girls had done body shots themselves while Karlie, Taylor and Adam were upstairs talking. Taylor had changed back into the dress Karlie had fetched for her from her bedroom before going back downstairs to join in on the fun. When she had finally emerged, they had surprised her with a birthday cake at the bottom of the stairs. Afterwards there had been opening of presents and lots and lots of dancing. 

Now Karlie snuggles close to Taylor, kissing the back of her neck as the older girl is on the verge of falling asleep.

“Did you have a nice birthday, baby?” she whispers to her.

“It’s always a nice birthday when I spend it with you,” Taylor replies sleepily. “Note for next year though: no crying. I’m tired of crying on my birthdays.”

“Aww, baby,” Karlie coos and holds Taylor tighter. “I’m sorry there was crying. Is there anything I can do to make it better?”

“Just hold me until I fall asleep,” Taylor answers with a yawn, and soon Karlie can feel Taylor’s body go limp in her embrace. 

She strokes Taylor’s arm until Taylor’s breath grows steady with the rhythm of sleep. Kissing the sleeping girl’s neck again, she breathes in Taylor’s sweet scent and falls asleep to the all too familiar wish of this being an option every single night. 

***

Karlie wakes up to an empty bed. Through the door that’s been left ajar, she can hear a trickle of conversation and smiles to herself. Taylor must have gotten up to join Lily in the kitchen. She pulls on a pair of sweatpants and a grey t-shirt and leaves the room to go join them.

On her way to the kitchen, she can smell the delicious smell of fried bacon and eggs. She hears Taylor laughing at something Lily said, and it makes Karlie’s mood soar. Taylor has such a beautiful laugh.

Walking into the kitchen, she finds Lily and Taylor already sitting at the table. Around them she sees scrambled eggs, omelettes, bacon, fresh strawberries, a bowl with some leafy greens, and a steaming pot of coffee. Karlie’s stomach growls hungrily at the sight of all the food. 

“Good morning, sunshine,” Taylor coos at her as Karlie sits down next to her and gives her a quick kiss. 

“Good morning,” she replies. “This looks amazing.”

“Lily honestly did most of it,” Taylor says with her mouth full of food. “I mostly sat here and watched.” 

“You’re a superwoman, Lily.” Karlie grins at her friend and sees a faint blush creeping up on Lily’s face. 

“Oh, hush you. It’s the least I could do as a repayment for letting me stay over.”

“Speaking of, how did you sleep?” Karlie asks, looking from Lily to Taylor. 

“I slept like a baby,” Lily says, “the best thing about being away from home for a night is the fact that no one wakes me up during the night.”

Karlie laughs. “If you miss being woken up at night, we can arrange for one of the cats to do it next time.”

“How about no.” Lily replies. “I like my sleep, thank you very much.”

Chuckling, Karlie turns towards Taylor. “What about you, babe? How did you sleep?”

“I slept alright. Should have had some more water before bed, but it’s okay.” She gives Karlie a small smile. “I probably shouldn’t have had that tequila.”

“You think?” Karlie teases, and gives Taylor a squeeze. 

“Don’t be mean.” Taylor jokingly says as she pulls away.

“Aww, I’m sorry, baby.” Karlie coos in reply and pulls Taylor in for a kiss.

“You guys are awfully cute and all that, but I’m trying to eat here.” Lily says, causing Karlie to break away from the kiss.

Looking at Lily, Karlie sees that she’s wearing a playful grin and Karlie resists the temptation to punch her lightly on her arm. Instead she just sticks her tongue out at her. “Oh, shush.”

“Speaking of you guys though, are you really going to go public?”

Karlie looks over at Taylor, feeling relieved that Taylor doesn’t seem surprised by the question.

“Yeah, I guess we are,” Taylor just says with a small smile. 

“Do you know how you’re planning on doing it?” Lily asks. 

“No,” Taylor sighs, her fork playing with the food on her plate now. 

“We’re going to ease into it,” Karlie says, looking at Taylor with concern. She wasn’t expecting the subject to bring Taylor down so quickly. 

“I’m sorry,” Lily says, obviously noticing the change in Taylor’s demeanor. “I shouldn’t have brought it up.”

Taylor looks up at her and sends her another small smile. “No, it’s okay. It’s probably smart to talk about it now while you’re here, maybe you can help us come up with some kind of a strategy.”

They sit in silence only interrupted by the clank of cutlery on plates while Lily thinks. 

“Okay,” she finally says, “this is how I see it. The two of you have been together for over a year already, and you,” she points at Taylor, “have been publicly dating Adam for a good part of this year. That is clearly something that bothers you, especially considering how last night went.”

Taylor nods slowly, her eyes wearing that same worn look she had after the night’s fight with Adam.

“Taylor,” Lily says, reaching across the table and taking her hand, “you tend to make things so complicated for yourself sometimes. I understand that taking the focus off of you and Karlie was important to you, otherwise you wouldn’t have done it, but it’s so obvious to me that hiding in plain sight is draining you. Adam isn’t helping – in fact, it seems to me like this so-called relationship you have with him is bringing you down. And so the first thing I think you should do is publicly break up with him. That’s like step number one.”

“Makes sense,” Karlie says.

There are tears streaming down Taylor’s face now, tears Karlie knows Taylor wants to keep inside and she hugs her girlfriend tight, kissing her cheek.

“I know you’re right,” Taylor whispers before she clears her throat. “What do you think should happen after that?”

“I think you should stop hiding your relationship from the public. And I don’t mean go public right away, but you’ve been hiding your friendship as well as your relationship.”

“We have been doing that,” Karlie says softly. 

“The fans have noticed it too,” Taylor says quietly. 

“Exactly,” Lily continues, “and I think maybe you should give the fans what they want. I think that’s the next step for you actually - be seen in public. You don’t have to confirm anything at the moment, but, do you remember how you used to be last year? How you were hanging out all the time, being spotted all over town?”

“How could I forget?” Taylor says, and looks at Karlie with loving eyes.

“I think you should try to ease your way back to that. Show them you're the best best friends that they've ever seen, don't hold back, and go from there.” 

As Karlie visualizes the plan in her head, she can’t help but smile. Being able to be seen with Taylor again will be amazing and she is struck by the realization of just how much she’s missed it. Gazing towards Taylor with a grin on her face, she recognizes a newfound determination on Taylor’s face.

“What do you think?” Karlie asks Taylor, hope radiating from her like heat from an oven.

“I think I like this plan,” Taylor replies, her voice stronger now. “I definitely need to deal with Adam soon, he needs to go. I think I have to tell him about this today.”

“That sounds like a good idea,” Karlie says with a grin. “Is this really happening?” she thinks to herself and resists the urge to get up and do a celebratory dance. Instead, she turns towards Lily.

“Thank you so much for this, Lily,” she says. “I’m so grateful for everything you’ve done for us.”

Lily blushes slightly. “Oh, it’s nothing. I only want what’s best for my friends, you know that.” 

“Really though, Lily,” says Taylor, “thank you.” Taylor gets up, walks over to Lily and gives her a hug. Karlie smiles as she, too, exits her seat. Walking over to the hugging girls, she wraps her long arms around both of them and holds them tight. 

***

A few hours later, Karlie is in the car with Lily to drop her off at the airport. Taylor had wanted to come as well, but Lily’s flight was leaving 50 minutes after Taylor was supposed to meet Adam for lunch, so it is only Karlie and Lily in the car.

Knowing what Taylor will be talking to Adam about soon, Karlie can’t help but feel a sense of nervousness about what will happen next.

She turns towards Lily and gives her a nervous smile. “Do you think we’re ready for this?” she asks.

“Ready for what?” Lily asks, “Going public?”

Karlie just nods.

“I think you are, and even if you aren’t, you will be by the time you actually do it. You’re just setting the wheels in motion right now.” She smiles and takes Karlie’s hand. “You’ve done incredibly well, you know, with all the rumors and the people who already think you two are together. I know we've talked about it before but I can see that it's killing you, not being able to say anything."

“Do you know how many times I’ve wanted to like their posts on tumblr, to reblog them and tell them they are absolutely correct in their assumptions?” Karlie replies, her voice shrill with frustration. “Do you know how frustrating it is to have to pretend we’re not together when in reality, we are, but we can’t tell anyone because then everything might come crumbling down on top of us?”

"I do and I think everyone would feel that way. I don't know if I would have done so well if I was in your shoes. But you’ve never faltered, you keep smiling and you’re not afraid of being who you are. I think Taylor is lucky to have you.”

“Thanks,” Karlie replies with a smile. 

“Taylor puts up a good front, you know, but I know we can both see the cracks in the foundation. Her fans might not, they only get glimpses of her life, but I've been able to see them for a while now. I definitely saw them last night.”

“Yeah,” Karlie says and looks out the window. “I’m a little scared, to be perfectly honest. I know this is the way to go, we can’t keep hiding like this and I swear, I’ve been dreaming about being able to kiss her in public for months on end, but…”

“It’s natural to be scared, though,” Lily says reassuringly. “She’s the one the media loves to pick on, and I don’t think that will suddenly stop once everyone knows about you two, but many of them are supportive. And you have the support of the people around you, your friends and your families, even your fans are supportive. You’ve got this.” Lily gives Karlie a pat on the arm.

“Yeah, I suppose.”

“And if you’re scared Taylor might crumble, don’t be. Whenever you two are in the same room, it’s like just you being there is enough to make her feel safe and protected. It's like this aura of calm that's not there when we're hanging out and talking about something that's worrying her and you're not around. I know talking to me helps her too, and she's still fine, but it just feels different. You can do this, I know you can. Just take it one step at a time.”

“Why do you always make so much sense?” Karlie asks just as the car drives into the drop-off area.

“Because I am old and wise and awesome,” Lily replies jokingly.

“Thank you again, for everything,” Karlie says and wraps Lily in a hug.

“Always,” Lily murmurs into Karlie’s hair before letting go of the taller girl. “Now, call me with any news and if you ever need to talk, I’m always here for you. That goes for Taylor too.” 

“I will,” Karlie promises, and blows Lily a kiss as she grabs her bag and exits the car. 

***

Karlie is on the treadmill when Taylor comes home a few hours later.

“Hey babe,” Taylor calls out, “where are you?”

“In here,” Karlie yells back. She slows to a jog and finally comes to a halt just as Taylor walks through the door. Getting off the treadmill, Karlie walks over to her and gives her a kiss.

“Ew, you’re all sweaty, get off of me,” Taylor whines and Karlie laughs.

“Never,” she teases playfully and deliberately hugs a squirming Taylor tight.

“You’re so gross,” Taylor mutters and Karlie releases her.

“You sound like you’re in a much better mood,” Karlie observes and sends her girlfriend a playful smile. Taylor just scowls at her, wiping her face with her hand. 

“Well, I was until your sweaty self attacked me,” Taylor with a pout.

“Oh, you love me.”

“Lucky for you, I do.” Taylor gives Karlie a smile before she continues. “And yes, I feel better. Adam and I talked for a long time, and we’ve agreed on a date for the breakup.”

“A date for the breakup. Wow. Sounds romantic.”

“Oh, shut up. I’m serious.”

Karlie laughs. “I know, I’m just teasing you. Please, go on.”

Taylor walks over to the chairs by the window and sits down in one of them, gesturing for Karlie to come over and join her in the other. 

“We talked a bit about last night and he actually apologized. It took me by surprise, to be honest. I think he was a bit shocked to hear that I want to do this, he didn’t think it would happen this soon. But I digress. The point here is that we're officially breaking up on January 25th.”

“Why that date in particular?” Karlie asks, confused.

“It was his request actually. His birthday is on the 17th and he doesn’t want to have to endure a bunch of questions about the breakup during his party. It makes sense when you think about it.”

“Yeah, I guess,” Karlie replies.

“It also gives me a while to discuss everything with Tree,” Taylor says, taking Karlie’s hand. “It’s a good thing, I promise.” 

“I know,” Karlie eventually says. “I just thought it would be sooner, that’s all.”

“Yeah, I know, I did too,” Taylor admits. “But I feel like I owe him that much at least.”

“Yeah…” Karlie agrees and looks at Taylor. The girl sitting opposite her seems to be calmer and more collected than she had been the night before, like a weight was lifted off her shoulders and a determination had set in.

“By the way,” Taylor says, snapping Karlie out of it, “you don’t have to be back in New York until Friday at the latest, right?”

“Yeah, that’s right.”

“Would you mind coming to Nashville with me, tonight? I need to discuss all this with my mom and I want you to be there. This is your life too, I don’t want to exclude you from anything.”

“Yes, of course,” Karlie replies with a grin, “I love spending time with your mom.”

Taylor stares at her with a smile on her face. “What did I do to deserve someone like you?” she asks softly and Karlie replies by giving her a lingering kiss.


	4. Chapter 4

It’s close to midnight when Karlie and Taylor enter Taylor’s Nashville apartment. The night outside is cold, almost freezing, and the sky is clear. Karlie drops her bag by the door and walks straight over to the large windows to look at the stars.

“I had forgotten how beautiful it is here at night,” she says as Taylor walks up and puts her arms around her. 

“I forget it too sometimes,” Taylor admits, “and it’s weird to admit that.”

Karlie turns her head and looks at Taylor with loving eyes.

“Does it make you feel weird?”

“No,” Taylor replies, “just nostalgic, you know? Every time I come here, I feel the calm serenity of home. It’s a different atmosphere here.”

“Yeah, I know what you mean,” Karlie says. “It’s the same feeling I get when I go back to St. Louis.” She gazes back out the window, taking in the view of the stars, while Taylor’s hands softly caress her stomach. 

“I think I want to move back here someday,” Taylor says after a while, her voice soft and gooey, like she’s scared Karlie won’t want to do it. But Karlie turns her entire body towards Taylor and kisses her.

“I wouldn’t mind that at all,” Karlie says, “but not right now.”

“No, not right now. But maybe in a few years,” Taylor replies. “Maybe when we’ve settled down.”

Karlie can’t help but smile. “I like how we’ve gone from hiding in plain sight to talking about where we’re going to live in like two days.”

Taylor gives her a small smile and looks at her with serious eyes. “I know it might seem like it’s suddenly going really quickly, but I want to spend the rest of my life with you, Karlie.”

“I know,” Karlie whispers in reply, “I want to spend the rest of my life with you too.”

Taylor lays her head on Karlie’s chest and they stand there for a while, just swaying in the silence. 

***

They show up at Taylor’s parents’ house around noon on the following day. Grabbing the keys from her pocket, she opens the door without knocking.

“Hey mom,” she yells as soon as she's opened the door. Soon enough, Andrea walks out to greet them. 

“Hey sweetie, what are you doing here?” she says as she gives her daughter a hug. Spotting Karlie behind her, she hugs her too. 

“Karlie,” she coos in the same way Taylor always does, and Karlie can feel her cheeks going red. 

“Hey Andrea, it’s nice to see you again,” Karlie says, “how are you doing?”

“Oh, you know,” Andrea says, “I’m doing well most days.” She gives Karlie a smile and looks from Karlie to Taylor. “Well, this is a nice surprise, girls. What’s the occasion?”

“Can’t your favorite daughter come home and see you every now and then?” Taylor replies with a playful smile on her face, and Andrea laughs.

“Of course you can, but we did just see each other two days ago.”

“Yeah, I know,” Taylor replies and takes Karlie’s hand. “Come, let’s go inside and sit down.”

“So how was your birthday? Was the party fun?” Andrea asks as they walk inside together and the girls come to a halt in the middle of the living room.

Karlie looks at Taylor with uncertainty, and Taylor meets her gaze before she looks away. “It was alright,” Taylor replies.

When Taylor doesn’t volunteer any more information about the party, Andrea cocks her eyebrows and stares at her daughter. “It was alright?” 

“Adam showed up,” Karlie tells her and understanding spreads across Andrea’s face.

“That explains,” she just says and gives her daughter a hug. “What happened?”

Taylor sighs and walks over to the couch, signaling for Karlie to come sit down next to her.

“They had a fight,” Karlie says. She sits down next to Taylor and Taylor automatically curls up in Karlie’s lap. 

“I basically told him not to come but he came anyway,” Taylor mutters, “and then I got angry and he pretty much told me he was in love with me.”

“Oh boy,” Andrea says, “that’s not good.”

“No, that’s not good at all,” Taylor mutters. Karlie strokes her hair softly and Taylor smiles up at her.

“So what did you do?”

Taylor looks lovingly at Karlie as she replies. “I told him I love Karlie.” 

Karlie can’t help but wrap her long arms around the shorter girl and give her a good squeeze. “I love you so much,” she breathes into Taylor’s hair and Taylor giggles softly. 

Composing herself, Taylor continues. “And I told him that it’s time for me and Karlie to come clean.”

“Are you serious?” Andrea asks, and Karlie can see a smile forming on Andrea’s face.

“Yeah, I want to do it,” Taylor replies, “I kind of have to.” 

“That is wonderful, darling, and about time too.”

“I know,” Taylor says with a small sigh. “That is actually why we came, to tell you about it.”

“I’m glad you did, honey.” Andrea says with a reassuring smile. “Do you know what I think? We need to celebrate this.” She gets up and starts walking towards the kitchen when Taylor’s voice stops her. 

“Mom,” she says and it’s like she flips a switch. Karlie can feel that the girl in her lap is shaking and she holds Taylor tight, leaning down to place her lips on Taylor’s hair, lending her some of her own strength. 

Andrea walks back towards them and sits down opposite Taylor.

“I’m scared,” Taylor admits quietly, a single tear trickling down her face. “I’m scared about what will happen when we do this.” She looks up at Karlie. “I’m scared that once everything blows up, you will leave me. I’m scared that you won’t want to be with me, and I know it’s ridiculous to think that because I know that you love me, but I can’t help it.” A river of tears now runs down Taylor’s face.

Taylor’s words hit Karlie straight in the stomach. “Tay…” Karlie says soothingly, “I’ll never leave you, I promise you that. I want this so much. You’re the love of my life, Taylor.” She leans down and kisses Taylor’s tears away, one by one. “We’ll be okay, I promise.”

While Karlie kisses Taylor’s tears away, Andrea strokes her daughter’s arm in steady motions. “You know, Taylor,” she says hesitantly, “I have always wondered how different things would have been for you if we had encouraged you to be yourself all those years ago.”

Taylor turns from Karlie towards her mom, looking confused. “What do you mean, mom?”

“Does she know about…?” Andrea’s gaze flickers towards Karlie.

“Emily?” Taylor answers. “Yeah, she knows.”

“Okay. Good, because I have always felt so guilty for what your dad and I decided for you back then. It’s just… you were so young and your dreams were just starting to come true. The industry is brutal enough by itself; you really didn’t need the extra pressure of being labeled the gay teenage country singer.” 

Andrea sighs and Taylor fidgets in Karlie’s lap just as Karlie realizes she is privy to a conversation Taylor and her mom have never had before.

“So we sent Emily away. “ Andrea continues, “Time went by and you started bringing home boys, but it never lasted. They always broke your heart in one way or another. I started wondering ‘is she really only into boys now? Was the thing with Emily just a phase? Or is she really only bringing home boys because that’s the only option she thinks she has, if she wants to keep her career?’ I wondered about it for years but I couldn’t bring myself to ask you about it because I felt so guilty for sending Emily away. I guess I was scared that if I brought it up, you'd be upset with me about it all over again. And you'd have every right to.”

Karlie is stroking Taylor’s hair while she listens to Andrea talk. Taylor sniffles every now and then, but she doesn’t say anything, she just listens. 

“Then, last year you come home for a few days and you sit in the kitchen with me and drink hot chocolate while tears stream down your face, and I wait for you to open up and tell me what’s wrong, but you won’t say a single word. So I ask you about it, and it all practically falls out of you, that you had fallen for someone and it was the worst thing that had ever happened to you because it could ruin everything you had ever worked for.”

At these words, Karlie’s stomach ties in knots and she can feel that her own tears aren’t far away. She knows that this had happened, Taylor had told her about it not long afterward, but the reminder makes Karlie want to scoop Taylor up and carry her with her to a place where no one could hurt her. Taylor clutches Karlie’s hand and holds it tight against her chest.

“That was when I realized that we had limited you,” Andrea says, “that we had made you feel like you couldn’t be yourself if you also wanted to have your dream.”

She leans forward so she’s able to look straight into her daughter’s eyes. “I am so sorry I ever made you feel that being who you are wasn’t good enough. I should have fought with you instead of implying that you should hide.” 

Taylor gets up from Karlie’s lap and walks over to her mother to embrace her in a big hug. She cries into Andrea’s hair and Andrea strokes her back until Taylor’s sobs go quiet. She grabs hold of Taylor’s arms and holds her steady in front of her. “I am so proud of you,” she says, looking into Taylor’s bright blue eyes, “for being brave enough to show the world who you really are. I am so proud that you took the chance with Karlie, that you put your insecurities aside so you could find happiness.” 

“As am I,” Karlie chimes in quietly. She gets up and stands next to Taylor, who hugs Andrea again before turning to Karlie.

“I love you,” she says to Karlie, her voice hoarse, and presses her face into Karlie’s chest.

Karlie just holds her and strokes her hair and says “I love you too.”

***

Half an hour later, the three women are in the kitchen. Karlie is by the kitchen counter, whipping up cookie dough while Taylor and Andrea sit by the kitchen table, chatting.

While Karlie absentmindedly pours ingredients into the bowl, she thinks back to the first time she met Taylor’s parents. It had been in the summer the year before, around two months after Taylor had told Karlie she loved her in early May – a conversation that had only happened in the first place because Karlie had pestered her about why she was acting so strange and fidgety all the time, to which Karlie had told Taylor that she was a dummy for thinking Karlie didn’t love her back because all Karlie wanted to do was kiss Taylor every single moment they were together. And so, in July, Taylor had brought Karlie home to meet the family. Karlie had nervously walked through the door and been greeted by Andrea’s loving arms. Andrea had looked at her with a smile on her face, said “so you are the one who has made my daughter so happy,” and hugged her tight. Karlie’s face had gone bright red and she had babbled a reply she can’t remember, and Taylor had just been giggling in the background. Later on in the day, when Taylor had been in the bathroom, Andrea had walked over to Karlie and thanked her for making Taylor so happy. Karlie hadn’t understood why she was being thanked then, but she understood it now.

“Karlie…” a voice breaks through Karlie’s chain of thought. “Earth to Karlie.” 

Karlie looks up and turns around to find Taylor standing next to her. “What?” she asks, confused.

“I said, I think you’ve stirred the dough enough now,” Taylor says with a smile and grabs the bowl Karlie is holding. 

Karlie lets her take it and gives her a quick kiss.

“What were you thinking about?” Taylor asks as she places spoonful after spoonful of dough on a cookie tray.

Karlie smiles and gazes towards Andrea. “I was actually thinking about the first time you brought me home to meet your parents.”

“Oh,” Taylor says with a smile.

Andrea gets up from her chair and walks over to them. “I don’t remember if I told you this that first time, Karlie, but out of all the people Taylor has brought home with her, I like you the most.”

Karlie giggles as Taylor lets out a whine. 

“MOM!” she yells, “oh my god, can you just not?” She leans towards Karlie. “She’s absolutely right though, she gushes about you all the time” she whispers. “This is so embarrassing,” she says out loud and Karlie laughs.


	5. Chapter 5

The next morning, Karlie and Taylor wake up from the sound of Taylor’s phone. Still half asleep, Taylor grabs her phone from the nightstand and answers it. “Hello?” she says.

“Who is it?” Karlie whispers, curious to find out who woke them up so early.

“Tree,” Taylor mouths at her and Karlie suddenly feels nervous. Did anyone see them together and post something online? 

Karlie stays quiet as she listens to Taylor’s one-sided conversation.

“Yeah, that is correct,” Taylor says out loud. “Of course I was going to tell you that, I was actually going to call you later today to discuss it. Yes. No! …Or, I don’t know, is that an option?” 

Taylor bites her bottom lip, something Karlie has noticed that she does when she gets nervous while talking on the phone. 

“Of course,” Taylor continues, “does she have to be there too? We’re in Nashville now and she has to go back to New York in the morning for work. No? Okay, can we just do it tomorrow then? First thing, I promise. Okay. Stop by at 9. Yep. Alright, bye.”

Karlie gives Taylor a quizzical look as Taylor hangs up the phone. “What did she want?”

“Take a wild guess,” Taylor replies with a sigh. “Apparently, Adam’s rep called Tree and wanted to discuss how to go about this public breakup and then since I of course haven’t told her yet, she was a little annoyed at me. We’re meeting tomorrow to discuss it.”

“Oh,” Karlie says and pulls Taylor in for a cuddle. “How do you feel about that?”

“I don’t know,” Taylor says after a while, “I mean, I was going to call her about all this today anyway so I think I feel okay?”

“That’s good,” Karlie replies. She puts a hand on Taylor’s face and leans in, their lips meeting in a soft, lingering kiss. 

Karlie leans her forehead on Taylor’s for a second, eyes closed, before Taylor brings her lips back to Karlie’s and forces the taller girl backwards until she lies flat on her back. Taylor is on top of her, her hands in Karlie’s hair now, her teeth teasing Karlie’s mouth in between kisses. Karlie can feel goosebumps all over and responds with a whimper as Taylor moves her soft, warm lips further and further away from Karlie’s mouth. 

A shiver runs down Karlie’s back as Taylor’s teeth graze her nipples while her hands go up and down Karlie’s body in long, slow motions. As Taylor alternates the nibbling with kissing, her hand slips between Karlie’s thighs and Karlie bites her bottom lip hard as Taylor’s cool hand meets her own heat. Taylor’s hand works slowly as Taylor’s lips meet Karlie’s again. Karlie’s breath is raspy between kisses, and when Taylor’s lips suddenly replace her hand, Karlie’s back arches and she squeals as Taylor keeps going until Karlie’s eyes roll back and her body sinks down into the mattress. Karlie feels her entire body relax, warmth spreading through her as Taylor kisses her again before wrapping her arms around Karlie. 

“You’re so good at this, it’s almost a shame people don’t know just how good you are,” Karlie murmurs happily and Taylor laughs. “But then they might want me to share you, and I don’t want to do that.”

She rolls over on her side and stretches a hand down Taylor’s thighs. Letting her long fingers run over Taylor’s skin, she leans in and gives her a kiss. 

“See,” she says, “this is mine,” she kisses Taylor’s nose, “and this is mine,” her hand grabs hold of Taylor’s ass, “and this,” her other hand on one of Taylor’s breasts. “Mine, mine, mine,” she murmurs in between each kiss she makes on her way down from Taylor’s face, stopping just below Taylor’s stomach. Karlie stops for a second to look at Taylor, her eyes almost shut from the pleasure, her teeth biting down on the left side of her bottom lip, before Karlie allows herself to move even further down. Taylor starts squirming as Karlie’s tongue runs in deep circles, her lips providing gentle massaging as a slow spasm finally ripples through Taylor’s body, rendering the older girl incapable of keeping quiet. 

Karlie kisses her way back up to Taylor’s face. “See?” she says huskily. “All mine.” 

***

Hours later, Karlie hugs her girlfriend in the backseat of one of Taylor’s cars. 

“I don’t want to go,” she pouts playfully, and Taylor smiles.

“I know, I don’t want you to go either.” 

Karlie suddenly remembers that she never asked Taylor why Tree had mentioned her in their conversation earlier. “Babe,” she says hesitantly, not wanting to ruin the mood in case it was something Karlie doesn’t want to hear, “earlier, when you were on the phone with Tree, you mentioned to her that I’m going back to New York. Why was that? What did she want me to do?”

“Oh,” Taylor says, “she just wants you to tag along to a meeting so we can discuss how to proceed. It’s not a big deal, I don’t think we’ll deal with that until after New Year’s.” Taylor sends Karlie a reassuring smile and Karlie instantly feels more at ease.

“Okay, that’s good,” she says with a smile, “I’m glad.” 

A loud knock interrupts them and Taylor rolls down the window to find one of her security guards standing outside. “Excuse me, Miss Swift, but we have just been informed that both planes are ready and we have been given slots to fly out in 15 minutes.”

“Alright, we’ll be right out,” Taylor replies to him and shuts the window again.

“I guess that’s it then,” Karlie says with a sigh.

Taylor caresses Karlie’s face and pulls her into a kiss. They kiss for what feels like minutes until Taylor pulls away and rests her forehead on Karlie’s so their noses touch. “I hate leaving you,” she says softly and Karlie wraps her arms around her.

“I’ll call you when I get home,” Karlie promises, “and we’ll see each other soon.” Grabbing her handbag, she leans in for another quick kiss. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” Taylor coos back and Karlie smiles.

Getting out of the car, Karlie looks back at her girlfriend and waves until Taylor is out of sight. 

***

It is cold in New York. The sky is full of threatening clouds and Karlie starts to wonder if there will be snow coming out of those clouds once they finally open. She pulls her coat a little tighter and wishes she was back in sunny LA with Taylor. They have only been apart for a day, but Karlie misses Taylor more than ever now that she knows everything is finally going to change, the future they have both been dreaming about for almost a year now finally within grasp. 

As Karlie makes her way down busy New York streets, she thinks back to the day the year before when they had decided that they weren’t ready to go public. It was the day after the 1975 concert where everything had gotten a little bit out of hand. Taylor had done one too many shots and was a little drunker than she had probably realized. Karlie herself had tried to keep things on the down low, there were so many people around and their relationship was still so new: neither of them was ready for this kind of public behavior. But it had happened – there had been sloppy kisses that Taylor had pressed to her cheeks and the corners of her mouth, and dancing that was so close it would have escalated into something not fit for the public eye if Karlie hadn’t gently pushed Taylor away, creating some much-needed space between them. 

They woke up early the next morning to phone calls and e-mails with pictures of various media headlines. Taylor read through every single article, her eyes growing wider and wider until she slammed the laptop closed and ran into the bathroom to throw up. Karlie didn't know if it was due to the fear of having outed herself or due to the massive hangover Taylor seemed to have that day, but Karlie suspected a mix of the two. She gave Taylor a minute before walking in after her, sat down next to her and held her as the older girl hyperventilated into her chest. Fear was still clearly visible in Taylor’s eyes as she finally looked up at Karlie. “What was I doing last night?” she asked, over and over, not really looking for an answer. Karlie stroked her hair and told her everything would be okay, even though she, too, felt scared about the consequences of this very public display of affection. Eventually, Taylor moved on from pure fear to utter heartbreak. She cried in Karlie’s arms until the shirt Karlie was wearing was wet with tears. Karlie felt so helpless in the situation, not knowing what she could do to make Taylor feel better, so she just stayed with her, was the rock that Taylor needed, and secretly hoped they would get through this. 

It took a while before Taylor was calm enough to call Tree and discuss the previous night and together, the three of them decided it was better for them to lay low and not be seen together. It publicly set them back to before their relationship had even started, basically taking them into uncharted territory, and it had broken Karlie’s heart. But it was something Taylor needed and Karlie loved her: Whatever Taylor needed, Karlie would give her. 

A car honks and catches Karlie’s attention. It stops next to her and the backseat window rolls down, a familiar face looking out at her. “Hey, get in. My driver here will drive us to the restaurant.” 

Karlie runs to the other side of the car and gets into the seat next to him. “Hey Josh,” she says with a smile and leans in for a quick, sideways hug. “I didn’t know you were driving today, I would have made you pick me up.”

Josh laughs. “I had a feeling this meeting would run late and I didn’t want to be late for dinner.”

Karlie looks around at the traffic that surrounds them. “Are you sure we’re going to get there in time for our reservation?”

“Oh, don’t you worry,” Josh replies with a wink, “They will hold our table.”

***

Half an hour later, Karlie and Josh are sitting in a fancy restaurant, much fancier than Karlie had expected. Josh has taken her to fancy places before, but he would usually tell her about it first. She thought they had plans to go to a much more low-key place, but he had changed his mind earlier in the day. Looking down at the green dress she’s wearing, she silently thanks Josh for being so thoughtful and bringing something appropriate for her to wear. 

“Why did you want to eat dinner here, exactly?” she asks him, looking around at the impressive room.

“I don’t know,” he says with a shrug. “Just wanted to take you somewhere nice, be an attentive boyfriend and all that.” He sticks his tongue out slightly and laughs.

Karlie laughs too. “I really wonder what everyone will say when they find out we’re a total sham,” she says.

“Oh please,” he replies, “I doubt that will be on their minds once they find out the reason for this sham.” He winks at her again, expecting Karlie to continue their playful banter, but Karlie’s expression changes as she gives him a smile.

“About that…” she starts before looking around them, making sure no one was listening in on their conversation. She lowers her voice and leans in closer to Josh. “T. and I decided it’s time. Or well, she kind of did the deciding. It was her choice to make anyway.” 

Josh’s eyes go wide as he realizes what she just said. “Oh,” he says, “maybe I shouldn’t have taken you here then.”

Karlie has to laugh at his flustered expression. “Relax. This is perfect and it will be a while before this relationship of ours will come to an end. Besides, it’s not like I plan on kicking you to the curb once the secret is out.” It’s Karlie’s turn to wink at Josh and he laughs.

“No, you’re right. That would be weird.” He flashes a big smile at her and she grins back. “Congratulations, by the way,” he continues. “I know you’ve dreamed about this for a while now. Are you ready for this?”

Karlie thinks about it for a few seconds before answering. “Yeah, I think I am,” she replies thoughtfully. “I mean, there is always a risk that this might blow up in all of our faces, yours included, but it’s a risk worth taking. I love her and she loves me and I think in the end, we need to be honest about that, you know?” 

“I do,” he says with a smile and takes her hand to give her a reassuring squeeze. 

“What about you?” she asks, “are you ready for this?” 

He laughs at her question. “Me? Oh Karlie. I love you for worrying about me, but you don’t have to. I’m not the one dating one of the most popular pop stars of our generation.”

“Jesus, keep your voice down,” Karlie whispers to him. 

“Sorry,” he says sheepishly and she smiles.

“It’s okay. But, what about your family?”

“They already know we’re not exactly real.”

“How so?” Karlie asks and cocks an eyebrow at him. “Did you tell them?”

“No, of course not. And they haven’t asked either, but it’s clear to me that they know. First of all, we’ve apparently been together for three years and I haven’t put a ring on your finger yet… Don’t you think that says a lot?”

“I guess,” Karlie admits. “Do you think they’re unhappy about it?”

“It doesn’t seem like it, at least not now. I can’t say what will happen once you and T. go public though.”

“Yeah…” Karlie says with a sad smile. “I’m so grateful though, Josh. I never expected you to go along with the whole couple thing once everyone started assuming we were one, but you did. And then when she came along… I would never have thought you wanted to continue with it. But you did, again. And you keep on sticking around.” She grabs his hand now. “You’re such a great guy, Josh. You really are.”

“Oh, stop,” he says, a touch of redness coloring his cheeks as he smiles at her. “You’re not so bad either. Hey, look. Food!” He points towards the waitress walking towards them and they both eagerly wait for their meals to be put in front of them.


	6. Chapter 6

Taylor calls Karlie later that night just as Karlie crawls into bed.

“Hey babe,” Karlie says happily.

“Hey beautiful, what’s up?”

“Oh, just got into bed,” Karlie replies. “Missing you and wishing you were next to me.”

“Aww, I know. I wish I was next to you in bed too.”

“You sound happy. I take it the meeting with Tree went alright?”

“Yeah,” Taylor replies, “I mean, she wasn’t particularly happy with me for going ahead and scheduling a breakup with Adam without consulting her first.”

“Yeah, I bet.”

“However,” Taylor continues, “we sat down and worked on a schedule; basically mapping out how this entire thing is going to be done.”

Karlie can feel her heart pounding faster as she starts to get excited.

“And…?” she asks, wanting Taylor to just spill the beans already.

“And… I was thinking we will be completely and fully out in the open around your birthday.”

Karlie takes a breath, but before she can let out a single word, Taylor continues. “I know August is a long time away, but that’s just the end point. As soon as we get the breakup over and done with, we can ease ourselves back into the public eye together, just you and I. And we can snuggle and cuddle and hold hands at an increasing rate until then. Tree will work out an actual plan for us to stick to and…”

“Taylor,” Karlie interrupts her, a huge smile on her face.

“Yes?”

“August sounds perfect. I’m serious, it’s going to be an amazing birthday.”

“I know,” Taylor says excitedly, “and there’s more. You see, Tree thinks we should be seen together in public sometime soon, before I officially break up with Adam. So Karlie?”

“Yeah?”

“Will you go on a date with me after Christmas?” Taylor giggles as she says it and Karlie can’t help but laugh. She has goosebumps on her arms and a tingling feeling goes down her spine as she replays the words in her head once before answering.

“I would be delighted.” She can’t stop herself from smiling and wishes that Taylor was there to see just how excited she is about this date. 

“I was thinking we can go for lunch. Or even dinner!” Karlie can hear the excitement in Taylor’s voice as she goes on about where they should eat. 

“I love you so much,” Karlie coos in reply to Taylor’s dinner plans. 

“I love you too, sunshine, and I can’t wait to see you again!”

“Same,” Karlie replies. “I hate that we’ve been apart so much lately. I wish I could spend Christmas with you like couples do.” 

“I know,” Taylor says with a sigh, “it has crossed my mind several times that we should start spending Christmas together. I promise we will do it next year. We can even argue about where we should spend it!” She gives Karlie an enthusiastic laugh.

“I love this idea already.”

As Taylor moves on to other topics, Karlie makes herself more comfortable. Even though they had barely shared a bed the last year, Karlie could never shake that lonely feeling she got every time Taylor was in a different city instead of next to her in bed. Now she was curling up into a ball under the sheets, closing her eyes and just focusing on the sweetness of Taylor’s voice.

“Karlie?”

“Yes?” she mumbles sleepily.

“Are you listening to me?”

“Always.” 

“So what did I just say?” Taylor asks, amusement in her voice.

“No idea,” Karlie replies with a yawn. “I was busy imagining your voice coming from the other side of the bed, not the other side of a phone.”

Taylor laughs and Karlie can imagine the smile on her face and how Taylor would have leaned across the bed to kiss her.

“Are you falling asleep?”

“Mmm,” Karlie replies.

“Do you want me to hang up?”

“No,” she replies, “keep talking to me so I can pretend you’re here.”

And Taylor talks about the cats and the weather and how a bird came crashing into a window that one time when she was ten until the only sound coming from Karlie is Karlie’s steady breathing.

***

It’s Christmas Eve and Karlie is lounging on the couch after a long Christmas Eve dinner with her family. She's absentmindedly stroking the dog lying next to her while she's scrolling through her Instagram feed when she gets a text message. Opening it, she finds a picture of what looks like Olivia tangled in a set of Christmas lights. “I thought you would appreciate seeing the outcome of Meredith chasing Olivia into the Christmas tree…” the text says and Karlie laughs. 

Just as she is about to text Taylor back, another message pops up in their conversation. It is yet another picture, this time showing a pouting Taylor holding up both of her arms, showing Karlie several long, red scratches. “…and this is what happened when I tried to get the lights off of her. Ungrateful cat.” 

While Karlie types a comforting message back to Taylor, Kimby sneaks up behind her, leans in and whispers into Karlie’s ear “messaging your secret girlfriend, I see”, startling Karlie. 

“Jesus, Kimby. Could you not?” Karlie growls back at her. 

Kimby stands up and laughs. “God, Karlie, you’re so easy to scare. How is Taylor?”

“She’s good,” Karlie says and gets that dreamy look in her eyes that she gets every time she thinks about Taylor. “Well, as good as you can be post-cat-mauling. Also, she’s won’t be my secret girlfriend for much longer.” Karlie looks at Kimby with a grin on her face.

Kimby stares back at her, clearly puzzled. “What do you mean she won’t be your secret girlfriend anymore? Are you guys breaking up?”

“No, you idiot,” Karlie replies, “we’re going public!”

“YOU’RE WHAT?” Kimby squeals loudly and smacks Karlie’s arm.

“Ow!” Karlie exclaims, rubbing her arm.

“What’s going on in here?” Karlie’s dad asks just as he, Tracy, and the two other girls walk out of the kitchen holding bowls of snacks, several mugs and a steaming jug of hot chocolate. 

“Karlie and Taylor are telling the world they are gay for each other!”

“Oh my God, Kimby,” Karlie groans, “do you have to say it like that?”

“Well, it’s true, is it not?” Kimby retorts with a playful pout and Karlie just rolls her eyes. “Hey, does this mean Adam’s going to be kicked to the curb soon?”

Kariann laughs at her twin’s question and Karlie glowers at them both for a second before answering.

“Yes,” she replies, “in about a month, there will be an official breakup. I would appreciate it if you could clamp down on the shading until then though,” she warns Kimby who smiles.

“I would never, ever do such a horrible thing,” Kimby replies innocently and Kariann giggles in the background.

“I think this is great news, honey,” Tracy says, putting an end to the banter happening between the two sisters. 

“When will this happen?” Kristine chimes in, handing Karlie a mug of hot chocolate.

“Thank you,” Karlie says as she takes the steaming mug from her sister. “It should happen sometime between now and my birthday. We don’t really have a plan set in stone yet, but Tree is working on it. We’re just going to ease into it, be ourselves and then just go for it, I guess.”

“I’m just wondering though,” Tracy says, “and you know we will support you no matter what, but do you think this is a great idea? Won’t there be consequences from this?”

“Of course there will be consequences,” Karlie replies, “and if you look at those alone, this is a terrible idea. But it’s time, mom. It’s time for us to stop hiding; we need to, Taylor especially. There are so many good reasons to do this, and all of the good outcomes from this will outweigh the bad, I can guarantee that. And I don’t think you need to worry too much about me – I’m not the one the world will focus on. They will focus on her and it will probably be horrible at first, but I will stand by her and we will get through it. She’s honestly the best thing that’s ever happened to me, mom. I don’t want to hide that from anyone.” 

Tracy gets up from her chair and sits down next to Karlie. “Of course you don’t want to hide that, and you shouldn’t,” she says as she wraps her arms around her daughter. “The world is just a cruel place and I’m your mother – it’s my job to worry about you.”

Karlie breaks the hug to give her mother a smile. “I know that.”

“I worry about Taylor as well. She’s my fifth daughter, you know,” Tracy says with a wink.

“Yeah…” Karlie says with a laugh. 

“You should have brought her home for Christmas, sweetheart. It would have been nice to have her here.”

“I know,” Karlie says with a grin, pleased that her mother wanted Taylor to be there. “She wanted to celebrate with her family though, spend some quality time with them at home after the long tour. But maybe I’ll bring her next year.” 

“That would be lovely,” her mother says.

“I have an idea though,” Karlie says and gets up from the couch. “Just wait here for a second.”

She rushes to her bedroom and takes her iPad out from her bag. Taking her phone out of her pocket, she quickly sends Taylor a message. “Do you have time for facetime right now? Bring the fam.”

She quickly gets a reply. “Of course, just give me a second. I’m nursing a food baby at the moment; might need some assistance in getting off the couch.”

Karlie laughs at the thought of Taylor stuffing herself on Christmas dinner as she walks back to the living room with her iPad. She stops just before she walks in and calls Taylor. “Hey gorgeous,” she says with a smile as she sees Taylor’s face on the screen. 

“Baby,” Taylor coos back and giggles. She turns her own iPad around to show her family sitting around her. “Brought the family like you said.”

“Good,” Karlie replies with a grin. “You see, my mom would have loved for you to be here so I figured this was a good second best.”

“Our first Swift-Kloss Christmas,” Taylor replies excitedly, making Karlie laugh.

“Yes, exactly. Alright, I’ll go in now so just yell hi or something to them once we get inside!”

Karlie turns the iPad around so the Swift family can see what she sees. Walking through the door and into the living room, Taylor yells “MERRY CHRISTMAS” at the same time as the rest of her family yells “SURPRISE” and Karlie laughs at the startled faces in front of her. 

“Since we can’t celebrate together in person, I figured this was second best,” Karlie tells her family and puts the iPad down on the table in front of them. 

As Taylor starts asking everyone how they are and Tracy asks Andrea how she is feeling, Karlie just leans back in her seat, feeling pleased that their families get along so well.

***

“Karlie…. Pick up the phone, Karlie…”

Taylor’s voice is penetrating Karlie’s dream and it takes a little while before she realizes that it’s coming from her phone. Taylor had hijacked Karlie’s phone months ago and made herself a custom ringtone for whenever she called her, and Karlie had never bothered to change it back to anything else. It made times like these a little nicer as waking up to Taylor’s voice was something Karlie really didn’t mind doing.

She fumbles with her phone. “Hello,” she mumbles sleepily into the phone.

“MERRY CHRISTMAS, BABY!” Taylor yells excitedly and Karlie groans while turning around in bed.

“What time is it?” she asks.

“It’s 5am, Karlie. Where is your holiday spirit?”

“Asleep, like I want to be.” 

“Aw, you’re no fun. I don’t think this will work out, we might as well break up right now.” 

“Ha ha ha,” Karlie replies. “Very funny, Taylor.”

“I’m serious,” Taylor says but Karlie knows she’s doing her best not to burst out in giggles.

“Sure, sure, babe. Maybe then I could get some more sleep.”

Taylor can’t hold her giggles in anymore and Karlie smiles a sleepy smile that she wishes Taylor could see. “I wish you were here with me,” she says.

“Me too,” Taylor says, “but do you know what is there with you? Your presents. Go open them!” 

“But that means I have to get out of bed,” she pouts.

“Doooo it, Karlie,” Taylor says and Karlie groans.

“Fine. But I hate you a little for this.”

She gets up and slips her feet into a pair of fuzzy, warm slippers. “You better hope I don’t wake anyone,” she whispers into the phone as she makes her way to the living room where all the presents are lying underneath the Christmas tree. “Should we switch to facetime for this?”

“Yes, let’s do that,” Taylor replies.

“Okay, I’ll call you back in a sec. Love you.”

“Love you too, baby!”

Karlie walks quietly through the house. When she gets to the living room, she shuts the door as soundlessly as she can before walking over to the pile of presents on the floor. She knows exactly where the presents from Taylor are, even though they were FedEx-ed to the house the day before and it was her mother who had put them under the tree. There are three of them, two small ones and one big. All of them are wrapped in bright red wrapping paper with little pictures of snowmen and reindeers. A white bow with red polka dots is placed on each gift. _Such a Taylor thing to do,_ Karlie thinks to herself and can’t help but smile. 

She sits down on the floor and places the presents in front of her before she facetimes Taylor.

“I’m ready,” she says as Taylor picks up, showing Taylor the presents.

“Okay, good,” Taylor replies excitedly. “I want you to open the big one first. And Karlie?”

“Yes?”

“You look beautiful.”

Karlie looks at the little icon of her reflection and laughs. “I look like I just got dragged out of bed – which I did, might I add.”

“Oh, stop complaining.” Taylor rolls her eyes. “Just open your presents already.”

“Okay, okay.” Karlie leans her phone up against another present and picks up the large one from Taylor. She reads the tag out loud. “To my beautiful girl. Love, Taylor.”

“The next one is longer,” Taylor says happily as Karlie rips the paper off of the present, revealing a large frame. Turning it around, she is faced with a watercolor painting of a blonde-haired girl in a red dress being hugged by a tall, yellow blob in the shape of a girl. 

“It represents us,” Taylor says and smiles at Karlie’s surprised expression. “The girl is me, obviously, and you’re the sunshine.” When Karlie doesn’t say anything, Taylor continues. “Do you like it?”

“Do I like it?” Karlie repeats. “Taylor, I love it. It’s beautiful and perfect and…” Karlie can feel tears trying to fight their way out and blinks them away. “I absolutely love it.” She looks at Taylor’s beaming face and blows her a kiss.

“Okay, next one!” Taylor squeals in happiness. “You should open both at the same time. They’re kind of… related.”

Karlie cocks an eyebrow at Taylor’s comment and picks up the biggest one of the two small presents, reading the tag out loud. “My dearest Karlie. Sometimes it hits me just how lucky I am to have you in my life. You are so smart and so beautiful, both inside and out, and I wonder what I ever did in life to deserve you. You are the best thing that’s ever been mine. Yours forever, Taylor.”

Karlie looks at Taylor with tears in her eyes. “Why are you so sweet?” she asks quietly. “I love you.”

“I love you too, and I mean every word I wrote on that tag.” The sincerity in Taylor’s voice makes Karlie’s heart flutter. 

She picks up the present, carefully avoiding ripping the tag as she rips the paper off. Inside is a small black bag that she puts aside for a second as she rips open the last present. 

“Okay, now open the little bags,” Taylor instructs her without actually needing to since Karlie’s hands are already fumbling with the biggest of the bags. 

Emptying it out into her hand, she finds herself holding a necklace. Holding it up to inspect it further, she realizes that it consists of tiny black and gold diodes placed on a gold chain. Putting it aside to open the smaller bag, she finds a matching pair of earrings. Holding the earrings in one hand and the necklace in another, she just stares at them, her gaze going from the necklace to the earrings and back again.

“They are beautiful, Taylor,” she finally says and she can see Taylor beaming at her. “I love them so much. Thank you!”

“I got them custom made for you,” Taylor says, “I wanted to get you something that nobody else would have, and I love how excited you get when you talk about coding and computers and I figured it would be perfect for you.”

“You are the best girlfriend ever,” Karlie coos at her, unable to wipe the smile off her face. “I wish I could kiss you right now.”

“You can kiss me in a few days,” Taylor replies.

“What about your presents?” Karlie asks. “Are you going to open them now?”

“Actually, no,” Taylor says with a mischievous smile on her face. 

“No? Then what was the point of waking me up at 5 in the morning and making me open my presents?”

“I wanted to give you a preview of our many Christmases together, because I can promise you that this is what will happen every Christmas morning,” Taylor says with a grin, making Karlie laugh.

“I don’t doubt that for a second.”

“I will open mine later,” Taylor continues, “and I will facetime you when I do. I promise.”

“Does this mean I can go back to bed now?” Karlie asks suspiciously.

“Yes, sleepyhead. You can go back to bed.”

“Sounds great,” Karlie says and stifles a yawn. “Thank you so much for these presents. They’re almost as beautiful as you.” 

“It was my pleasure,” Taylor says and blows Karlie a kiss. “I love you, sleepyhead.”

“I love you too, princess,” Karlie replies, and after a wave and a kiss she hangs up. Taking her painting and her jewelry with her, she quietly goes back to her bed and falls asleep.


	7. Chapter 7

Karlie is running up the stairs to Taylor’s apartment. It’s been almost two weeks since she saw her girlfriend last and knowing she’s about to see Taylor’s face makes Karlie’s heart flutter. “Two weeks is really too long to be apart,” she thinks to herself as she unlocks the door and walks in.

She barely has time to put her bags down on the floor before a blonde whirlwind crashes into her, pinning her to the door. Taylor’s lips meet Karlie’s quickly and forcefully, pressing Karlie’s head back towards the door. Taylor’s hands are on Karlie’s cheeks, not giving the taller girl an opportunity to move in any other direction than where Taylor wants her to go.

“Hello to you too,” Karlie says with a grin as Taylor pulls her lips away from Karlie’s and starts unbuttoning Karlie’s shirt before pulling it off completely. 

Taylor just grins back at her with mischief shining through her eyes. “Come,” she says and takes Karlie’s hand, pulling her with her towards the couch. Pushing Karlie down onto it, she quickly removes Karlie’s pants in a familiar motion. Karlie props herself up on her elbows as Taylor places herself on top of her, pinning her down. She pushes Karlie down flat on her back and kisses Karlie’s jawline as her hand slips in between Karlie’s legs. Karlie pushes herself into Taylor’s hand until shivers overpower her entire body and she can no longer stay quiet, whimpering and squirming underneath Taylor.

“Welcome home, baby.”

Taylor gives Karlie a kiss before she unpins Karlie from the couch and walks off. 

“Wait, where are you…” Karlie starts asking, confused as to why Taylor left her so abruptly, but she quickly realizes she is too out of breath to finish the sentence. She pants on the couch for a few minutes, slowly regaining some sense of control over her body, while Taylor grabs the large bag Karlie had dropped on the floor when Taylor had all but attacked her. Sitting up, Karlie watches her girlfriend open the bag and take out the beautiful painting of Taylor and the sunshine girl.

Taylor holds the painting up in front of her and purses her lips.

“What are you doing?” Karlie asks, causing Taylor to turn around.

There’s a sparkle in Taylor’s eyes as she walks back towards Karlie, the painting in her hands. “Was just thinking where we should put this, and I think I have the perfect spot for it.” Reaching out one of her hands towards Karlie, she pulls Karlie off the couch and leads her through the kitchen and into the den behind it.

Taylor walks up to one of the walls and picks a framed painting off the wall, replacing it with the painting she made. As Karlie admires how good it looks on the wall, Taylor picks up another picture frame and hangs it up next to it. Karlie smiles when she sees it’s the portrait of the two of them with the cats that she gave Taylor for Christmas. 

“I love it,” Taylor says happily and walks over to Karlie. Karlie puts her arms around Taylor and kisses her.

“They look perfect next to each other,” Karlie murmurs into Taylor’s hair.

“Just like us,” Taylor replies.

Karlie’s mouth finds Taylor’s again and their lips touch for minutes until Karlie is the one leading Taylor through the kitchen and upstairs to their bed.

***

Hours later, Karlie stands in front of the mirror in the bathroom, wearing nothing but underwear and getting ready for their public and very platonic date. 

Coming up behind her, Taylor pokes her in the ribs. “I should honestly be more insecure when getting undressed next to you,” she says playfully and Karlie laughs.

“Stop it. I’m really not all that,” she replies.

“If you say so,” Taylor says and sticks her tongue out.

“I know a place you can stick that tongue of yours,” Karlie replies with a wink.

“Karlie!” Taylor looks at her, shocked, making Karlie laugh.

“Yes, exactly.” A sly smile spreads across Karlie’s face as Taylor’s cheeks grow redder and redder.

“What… just…” she splutters and Karlie laughs.

“Oh relax, I’m just joking.”

“You’re insufferable,” Taylor replies, her eyes narrow now.

“Good thing you’re stuck with me forever,” Karlie teases and pulls the shorter girl into a hug. 

Taylor sees her opportunity and starts tickling Karlie, causing her to break away from the hug.

“No no, nonono, don’t, get away from me,” Karlie squeals and makes a narrow escape from Taylor’s grasp and into their bedroom. Grabbing a pair of black jeans and a shirt, she quickly pulls them on only to notice that Taylor hasn’t followed her. Taylor stands in the doorway, gazing at Karlie with a smile on her face.

“What?” Karlie asks her.

“Nothing,” Taylor replies, still smiling.

“Okay…” Karlie says suspiciously before she ducks into the wardrobe to find shoes. “Where is it you’re taking me anyway?” she asks just as she ducks back out with a pair of nice black boots in her hand.

“I was thinking we could go to your favorite sushi place,” Taylor says.

“That is a great idea. I’m hungry already,” Karlie replies with a dreamy look on her face. 

“If you’re ready, we can leave now if you want. I have a standing reservation for tonight.”

“Oh, you do, do you?” Karlie replies with a wink.

“Of course I do. I wasn’t sure when we would get out of here considering we hadn’t seen each other in two weeks.”

Karlie laughs. “You really do think of everything.”

“I do,” Taylor replies with a grin. “Ready?”

Karlie nods. “Just need to grab my purse, it’s downstairs.”

Taylor grabs Karlie’s hand as they walk downstairs. “We need to be seen today,” she says, “so Tree will alert the paparazzi about our whereabouts so we’re sure that they will find us, okay?”

“Okay,” Karlie says and squeezes Taylor’s hand. “Let’s do this.”

***

Inside the black SUV driving Karlie and Taylor to the restaurant, Karlie is sitting with her phone in her hand, flipping through pictures on Instagram. 

“Hey, do you want me to post anything about this?” she asks Taylor.

“Not right now,” Taylor replies, “but maybe you can do it once we’re there.”

“Sure,” Karlie says just as she comes across a picture of Joe that one of her sister’s had posted. “Oh my God, look at him,” she coos and Taylor laughs.

“He’s such a cute dog,” Taylor agrees, “but he really doesn’t have anything on Olivia.”

Karlie glowers at her girlfriend, lips pursed into a thin line.

“You did not just say that.”

“I did,” Taylor says with a laugh and Karlie smacks her lightly on the arm.

“You’re biased,” she mutters.

“Oh, like you’re not?” Taylor counters.

“No,” Karlie grins, “I love all of them.”

“Sure. Keep telling yourself that.”

“Excuse me, Miss Swift,” one of Taylor’s security guards says, interrupting them. 

“Yes?”

“There seem to be a photographer following us, by bike.”

“Really?” Taylor turns around in her seat trying to find him, and sure enough, the same guy who just photographed her and Karlie walking out from Taylor’s apartment is now following them by bike.

“Wow, that’s dedication,” Karlie says in disbelief.

“I guess we don’t have to alert them after all,” Taylor says with a small smile.

“Would you like us to try and shake him?” the security guard asks.

“No, it’s alright, Kevin. Let him follow us, let’s see if more will join him.”

They sit in silence for a few minutes while Taylor keeps an eye on the guy following them. Karlie looks over at her, trying to read her girlfriend’s demeanor to figure out if she’s really okay with this or not.

Deciding she should just ask, Karlie reaches out her hand and grabs Taylor’s. 

“Hey, are you okay?” she asks quietly.

Taylor turns her gaze towards Karlie and nods. “Yeah, I’m fine. Don’t worry, Kar.” She flashes Karlie one of her reassuring smiles and Karlie returns it.

“Okay, good,” Karlie says. “Are you nervous?”

Taylor lets out a short laugh. “I’m always nervous. But for this thing in particular? No, not really.” 

“That’s good,” Karlie says and leans in to kiss Taylor’s cheek. “We should be there soon. How exactly do we play this?” 

“What do you mean?” Taylor asks.

“I just mean... it’s been a while since we’ve been seen in public, just the two of us. What level of affection do I stick to?”

“Oh,” Taylor says, “I think maybe limit the physical affection to a bare minimum, just for now.”

“Gotcha,” Karlie replies with a wink. “Can I hold the door for you?”

“Of course,” Taylor says with a laugh, “I wouldn’t expect anything less from you, you’re too polite to not do that.”

As the car comes to a halt, Taylor leans in towards Karlie and kisses her quickly.

“Ready?” Karlie asks as Kevin opens their door for them to climb out. With a quick nod and a smile, Taylor exits the car and walks briskly towards the door of the restaurant. Karlie follows her with long steps, reaching the door at the same time as Taylor. “After you, my lady,” Karlie whispers and holds the door open for Taylor.

***

They are seated towards the back of the room at a table for two in the corner. Karlie takes the seat facing the room, letting Taylor sit with her back towards the windows so the people on the streets won’t stop and stare too much. 

Halfway through their meal, Karlie absentmindedly gazes towards the window and suddenly registers the sheer amount of paparazzi standing outside.

“Um, Tay…” she says quietly, staring at the people outside.

“Yeah?” 

“I think that paparazzi brought all of his friends.”

Taylor turns around to have a look and gasps. “Holy shit,” she whispers, her eyes wide as she turns back towards Karlie. “I guess there’s absolutely no need to alert them now,” she says and laughs, making Karlie smile.

“No, I think they already know.”

“Our fangirls are going to freak out when these photographs end up online.”

“I know,” Karlie says with a laugh. “They won’t know what to do with themselves.” Leaning across the table to get closer to Taylor, she whispers “I can’t wait to see their reactions when we finally come clean.” 

Taylor giggles. “Oh boy, I think they might end up breaking the internet or something. I see how they analyze everything we do, how they get so much of it right without even realizing it. If we give them actual pictures to prove their theories right, I really don’t know what will happen. They might not be able to handle it.”

Karlie grins. “Maybe we should play a prank on them, give them little hints and see if they catch on before everyone else does.” A mischievous look flashes across her face and she winks to Taylor, who just shakes her head slightly.

“That is so evil, Karlie,” she says, her voice level, “We should totally do it.”

“Oh, they’re going to hate us,” Karlie replies with a grin.

“I know. It will be amazing.”

“You know, if this break of yours is just going to be us pranking your fans, I’m not sure how many fans you’ll end up having once you go back to work.”

“Nah, it will be okay,” Taylor replies with a small shrug, “Besides, it will be totally worth it to see the looks on their faces once they figure it out.”

“I would hope so,” Karlie says mischievously, “otherwise I might have to reconsider this relationship. I don’t think I’d like you much without your fans, you’re a package deal.”

Taylor puts her hand on her chest, letting out a huff. “Ouch. You only like me for my fans? Brutal.” 

“I wish I could kiss you right now,” Karlie says so quietly it’s only within Taylor’s earshot.

Taylor’s expression softens as she smiles. “I know. Me too.”

“Soon,” Karlie says and Taylor nods.

“Soon.”

Finishing their meal, Taylor lets her security team know they’re ready to leave.

“Do you want to go somewhere else or should we go home?” Taylor asks Karlie while they wait for the car to be brought out to the front of the restaurant. 

“I think we should just go home,” Karlie replies, “and we can watch a movie and drink hot chocolate. I just want to spend a quiet night in with you.”

“Movie, hot chocolate and cuddling. Sounds like the perfect evening to me.”

Karlie flashes Taylor an excited smile as Kevin signals them that the car is waiting for them, and after a short minute of being covered in camera flashes, the girls are safely inside of the car and on their way back home to Taylor’s apartment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys. Just wanted to let you know that I REALLY hope I can get the next chapter out next week sometime, but since it's Christmas and I'm swamped at work (working in retail during the holidays is SO MUCH FUN!) I don't know if I'll have the energy to sit down and write. So if I don't manage to update next week, happy holidays!! :)


	8. Chapter 8

Karlie wakes up the next morning to find Taylor sitting next to her in bed with her laptop on her lap. 

“Good morning, sunshine,” Taylor coos when she realizes Karlie is finally awake.

“Morning. What time is it?” Karlie asks with a yawn.

“It’s just past nine,” Taylor replies. “You can go back to sleep if you want.”

“No, it’s okay,” Karlie says and stretches her long body. “How long have you been up?”

“Just an hour or so,” Taylor replies, “I couldn’t sleep so decided to go online and check tumblr.”

“Ah,” Karlie says, “and how are the fangirls?”

“Freaking out, as expected,” Taylor says with a laugh. 

“Good,” Karlie says, laughing too, “and how about headlines? Are there any?”

“Not that I’ve seen,” Taylor replies, “but you know I don’t go looking for them either.”

“Yeah, I know, but figured I should ask anyway.” Karlie smiles at her girlfriend who leans over to kiss her. 

“You have morning breath,” Taylor teases, earning her a smack on her arm from Karlie.

“Don’t be mean,” Karlie replies, “or I might go sleep in my own bed tonight.”

Taylor grins innocently. “Don’t,” she says, “I want you to stay here.”

“I sometimes wonder why I keep my place around. It’s not like I’m there much whenever you’re in New York.”

“You need to at least keep it until we come clean, Kar,” Taylor says as she closes her laptop and pushes it away from her. She moves closer to Karlie and Karlie lays her head in Taylor’s lap. Taylor plays with Karlie’s hair as Karlie looks up at Taylor with a smile on her face.

“I know,” Karlie says, “and I will still stay there when you’re away.” She absentmindedly plays with Taylor’s fingers, intertwining them with her own.

“You know, some of the fangirls questioned the fact that I was here, in New York, with you instead of being somewhere else with Adam,” Taylor says suddenly, making Karlie look up into Taylor’s blue eyes again. 

“I guess that’s understandable, considering how we are supposed to be together. They sort of concluded that he’s still in Scotland, which I don’t actually know if he is, but that we would be together for New Year’s.”

“Oh God,” Karlie groans, “please don’t tell me that is an actual plan of yours that you forgot to tell me about.”

“No, no, no, of course not,” Taylor says as she moves Karlie’s hand up to her face and kisses it. “I’m staying here, with you.”

“Okay, good,” Karlie says with a sigh of relief, “because I have plans for us.”

“Oh, do you?” Taylor says, cocking an eyebrow and Karlie grins.

“I do. But I’m not telling you. It’s a surprise.”

“Hmm…” Taylor replies, shifting from sitting up to lying halfway underneath Karlie. “I do like surprises.” She gently pulls Karlie close and plants her lips on Karlie’s, kissing her softly. 

Karlie just smiles in between kisses, thankful that Taylor still doesn’t know what Karlie’s plans are for New Year’s.

***

“Do you trust me?” Karlie asks Taylor a few days later. It is New Year’s Eve and the pair of them is in one of Taylor’s SUV’s, the car empty except for them. Karlie had asked the team to please wait outside the car once the two girls got inside, because she had something she needed to do before they could get on their way.

Taylor looks at Karlie with narrow eyes. “Yes…” she answers suspiciously and Karlie meets her suspicious look with an innocent smile.

“Okay, good,” Karlie says and turns away to rummage through her overnight bag.

As she pulls out a thin, dark scarf from her bag, Taylor’s eyes widen in shock.

“I am so confused,” Taylor mutters and Karlie laughs.

“Don’t worry, it’s nothing horrible. I just need to blindfold you for the trip so you won’t know where we’re going until we’re there.”

“Okay…” Taylor says skeptically. “Why can’t you just tell me where we’re going?”

“Oh, come on, Tay,” Karlie says, “live a little! It’s a surprise, just trust me.”

“Okay, fine. But it’s only for the ride, right?” 

“Yes,” Karlie answers, “it’s only for the ride. Don’t worry, I’m not going to bring you someplace in the middle of New York City with a blindfold on for everyone to see, especially not on New Year’s Eve.”

Taylor gives her a small smile. “I would hope not. I can imagine the scandalous headlines that would create already.”

“You worry too much,” Karlie says with a laugh. “Now, turn around so I can put this on you.”

Taylor turns her back to Karlie and doesn’t fidget too much as Karlie binds the scarf in front of her eyes. 

“Okay, you can turn back now,” Karlie instructs her. “Can you see anything?”

“No,” Taylor replies, “and just so you know, I’m not a fan of this.” 

Karlie leans in and kisses Taylor softly, and Taylor responds ever so slightly. “I know, babe,” Karlie says. “It’s only for a little while. I’ll protect you if anything happens.”

“I would worry more about who will protect you from me if this goes horribly wrong,” Taylor mutters icily, but Karlie can see the small smile on Taylor’s face that gives her away.

“You’re funny,” Karlie tuts and leans in to nuzzle Taylor’s nose with her own. 

“This better be worth it,” Taylor murmurs back at her.

“Trust me, it will be.”

***

Thirty minutes later, the car comes to a halt behind the Ritz Carlton hotel. Karlie smiles to herself as she wonders if the hotel has followed up on her requests, wanting the night to be perfect.

“Are we getting out?” Taylor asks excitedly as one of her security guards opens his own door and gets out. 

“Yeah, in a second. Had to send someone in first to make sure the coast is clear.”

“Are you taking this thing off me now?”

“Once Mike gets back.”

They wait in silence for a few minutes. Karlie’s stomach is full of butterflies as she hopes she has managed to pull this off just the way she wanted to do it, and her heart skips a beat when Mike knocks on her window, catching her off-guard. 

“Okay,” she says to herself and reaches out to remove the scarf from Taylor’s eyes.

Taylor immediately looks around trying to figure out where Karlie has taken her.

“Where are we?” she asks.

Karlie just laughs. “You’ll find out in a second.”

There’s another knock on the door and this time the door opens. Grabbing her own overnight bag and handing Taylor’s off to Mike, Karlie gets out of the car and is quickly ushered into the door in front of them, Taylor following closely behind her. 

“I got them to close off the service elevator for a few minutes, and the corridor on the 20th floor should be empty as well,” Mike informs Karlie and hands her the room key. “We’ll be in the room just across yours, keeping watch, but I don’t think there should be any trouble here. Enjoy your night.”

Mike walks ahead of the girls, making sure both the elevator and the hallway is cleared before he leads the girls towards their room. Karlie turns towards Taylor, who is staring at the décor in the hallway, looking completely shocked, and hands Taylor the key. “Go on,” she says, “open it.”

Taylor takes the key but before she puts it into the lock, she stares at Karlie instead. “The Ritz-Carlton? Really?”

“What?” Karlie asks teasingly, “isn’t it fancy enough? Or is it the fact that it’s too fancy?”

“It’s mostly that we have a perfectly beautiful apartment right here in the city.”

“But that one doesn’t have the perfect view of the Central Park fireworks.” Karlie says and winks to Taylor who just shakes her head a little and smiles.

“Okay, good point,” she says and Karlie grins.

“Come on, open the door.”

“God, don’t be so impatient, Karlie,” Taylor teases and slips the key into the lock, finally opening the door. Karlie watches Taylor closely as the door swings open to reveal a floor covered in red rose petals. Taylor’s eyes widen and her mouth falls open, and Karlie can’t help but smile at her reaction. Taylor gazes towards Karlie, staring her down for a few seconds before staring back into the room. “You didn’t,” she says in disbelief.

Karlie just smiles. “I did,” she replies and puts her arm over Taylor’s shoulders, holding her tight. “Now hurry up and go inside so I can kiss you,” she whispers into Taylor’s ear and Taylor nods in agreement.

Saying a quick goodbye to the security guards, Taylor shuts the door. Immediately after, she finds Karlie’s lips, kissing them fiercely as the two of them stumble through the apartment, following the trail of roses all the way to the bed.

***

A few hours later, Karlie is lying in bed staring at the dim outline of Taylor standing in the window, a sheet wrapped around her, leaving her shoulders bare. Karlie traces Taylor’s outline with her gaze, taking it in, attempting to etch it into her mind forever.

“The view from here is breathtaking,” Taylor says quietly.

“Tell me about it,” Karlie replies, smiling.

Taylor turns around and rolls her eyes at Karlie, but her eyes twinkle, letting Karlie know she appreciates the comment. Karlie gets up, her own sheet trailing behind her as she walks up to Taylor, coming to a halt directly behind her. Wrapping her arms around Taylor, she kisses Taylor’s hair as they look at the view together for a few minutes. Outside, the city lights surround Central Park, and though it’s not her first time seeing the city this way, she’s sure that this time is her favorite. She smiles to herself because there is no place in the world she’d rather be but here with Taylor, looking out over the city that they love, together.

“What do you say we order dinner now?” Karlie whispers in Taylor’s ear and Taylor nods.

“Dinner sounds amazing right now.” Taylor turns in Karlie’s arms, facing Karlie now and kisses her lightly, one, two, three times before breaking out of their embrace to find the room service menu in the other room.

An hour later, there’s a knock on the door and Karlie, now wearing a casual light blue dress, answers it, coming back in with a cart filled with deliciously smelling food. She sets it out on the table in the sitting room, lighting candles and pouring wine for the both of them. 

“Tay,” she calls out, “dinner is served.”

Karlie turns around and finds Taylor standing in the doorway, barefoot, wearing one of her white summer dresses that always takes Karlie’s breath away. Karlie gasps, the dress clearly having the same effect on her this time as last time. A smile spreads across Taylor’s face in response to Karlie’s reaction and she twirls into the room, stopping in front of Karlie. She strokes Karlie face lightly with three fingers, her eyes glinting in the candlelight, bringing out a smile on Karlie’s face.

Grabbing the chair next to her, Karlie pulls it out. “My lady,” she says happily, signaling for Taylor to sit.

“Thank you, kind sir,” Taylor replies jokingly and sits down. 

Karlie takes a small bow. “Anything for my lady,” she says before joining Taylor at the table. Picking up the glass of wine, she holds it up. “A toast to you, my beautiful girl, to the New Year and to new adventures together.” Their glasses clink and they both sip.

“This is really good wine,” Taylor says, putting her glass down, “and the food smells delicious.”

“I know,” Karlie says, “it’s making my stomach growl. I’m so hungry I could eat a horse. Except, you know, I wouldn’t actually eat a horse.”

Taylor giggles. “I know, babe. I absolutely agree though, let’s dig in.”

They eat in a comfortable silence for a while until Taylor leans back in her chair, her glass of wine in her hand. “I think this is my new favorite thing,” she says softly.

“What is?” Karlie asks, looking up from her plate of food.

“This. You, me, a romantic, candlelit dinner and a beautiful view of Central Park. I could definitely get used to this.”

“Good,” Karlie says with a laugh, “because this is what our life will be like, I can almost guarantee it.”

***

A few minutes before midnight, Karlie pops open the bottle of champagne that had been waiting for them. After a few quiet hours of cuddling and talking, Taylor and Karlie now stand in front of the window waiting for the fireworks to start. Karlie pours champagne into two glasses and hands one to Taylor. 

Karlie has her arm around Taylor, Taylor’s head resting on Karlie’s shoulder, waiting in anticipation for the beginning of the New Year.

“Look!” Taylor says suddenly, glancing at Karlie with happiness in her eyes as the fireworks start.

“Happy New Year, princess,” Karlie coos and kisses Taylor softly before holding up her glass. “To us!”

“To us!” Taylor repeats and they toast for the New Year. 

“I can’t wait to spend the future with you,” Taylor says quietly, hugging Karlie tight before turning to watch the fireworks again.

Karlie squeezes her from behind, her arm wrapped around Taylor’s stomach now. “Spending my future with you is the only thing I want to do,” she whispers happily and gives Taylor another kiss. Absentmindedly stroking Taylor’s stomach, she closes her eyes and makes a silent wish for the New Year to be as happy and peaceful as this exact moment.


	9. Chapter 9

Karlie awakes the next morning to Taylor shaking her gently. 

“Hey,” she says sleepily, “what’s up? What time is it?”

“It’s almost 10:30,” Taylor replies, “and Adam just texted me and it’s bad but it’s good. Can it be both bad and good at the same time?"

Karlie sits up and rubs her eyes. “Wait, I’m confused. What did Adam text you?”

“Here, read it,” Taylor says and hands Karlie her phone.

She starts reading the text out loud. “Taylor, I think I messed up. Had quite a few ladies flirting with me during my set last night. I was drunk and it’s been months since I’ve gotten any…”

Karlie groans. “Ugh, did he really say that?” she asks, her voice full of disgust.

“Yeah,” Taylor says, “go on.”

“… and I was into it, her, but then she suddenly asked me if I wasn’t seeing you, and I think I said that we're as good as broken up but I can’t really remember because it’s sort of hazy… I know I messed up and I'm sorry, especially since I was the one who insisted on waiting until after my birthday. But you're off the hook, you don’t have to show up now if you don’t want to, and I’m assuming you don’t.”

Karlie stares at Taylor, Taylor’s iPhone still in her own hand. “Is he serious? Did he really just…?”

Taylor nods, eyes wide. “I think so. This is bad. This is very, very bad.”

“But also good?”

“Yes. I mean, we can stop pretending, let the rumors fly and now I don’t have to show up at his party, but just… Oh man.” 

Taylor puts her face in her hands and sighs loudly. Karlie puts her arms around her girlfriend and strokes her back in silence.

After a few minutes, Taylor looks up at Karlie with a determined look on her face. “This is a good thing,” she says, her voice so calm that Karlie has to cock an eyebrow at her. 

“How are you so calm all of a sudden?” she asks. This was very unusual for Taylor. 

“I don’t know, to be honest,” Taylor admits, “but I think he just did us a favor. I just need to talk to Tree. She needs to know what’s coming.”

“Good idea,” Karlie says, “I’ll go have a shower while you call her.”

“Or,” Taylor says seductively, “you can go have a shower after I call her and I’ll join you.”

“I like the way you think,” Karlie replies with a grin. 

***

While Taylor talks to Tree, Karlie goes into the bathroom to wait for Taylor to be done with the call. She doesn’t have to wait long before she hears the sound of Taylor’s fingers tapping on the door frame, causing Karlie to turn around. 

“Oh my,” Karlie exclaims as the sight greeting her is Taylor, just Taylor, completely naked. 

Taylor cheerfully moves closer to Karlie, stopping right in front of her with a grin on her face.

“That was fast,” Karlie says, her eyes running all over Taylor’s slim body. She cups one of Taylor’s soft breasts in her hand and gives it a careful squeeze, enjoying the feel of Taylor’s soft skin under her fingers.

“I told her I was busy so I couldn’t talk long,” Taylor replies with a smile on her face. She tugs at Karlie’s panties, the only clothing Karlie is wearing, and Karlie lets them slide to the floor.

Leaning in, she kisses Taylor’s chest right in between her breasts and can feel Taylor’s body tense up with pleasure. 

“Shower. Now,” Taylor moans and all but pushes Karlie into the shower, not once letting the taller girl remove her lips from Taylor’s body for more than a second at a time. 

Soon, the water's rushing down on them, hands caressing soft skin, fingers tracing familiar curves, working all the right places, like putting together a puzzle they had solved long ago, and over and over, without ever growing tired of it. Taylor grins wickedly as she takes the shower head down from the wall, and soon it's put to much better use. And then, the only sounds that can be heard over the steady noise of the running water are the gasps and moans coming from the two girls.

***

It is a week into the new year and Karlie is in the middle of a three-day long photo shoot. Taylor is back in Nashville for the week to catch up with some friends she hasn't seen for a while because of tour, while Karlie works, and Karlie misses her. 

She has been sleeping in her own apartment while Taylor has been gone, and even though they have spent so much of the past year apart, over the past few weeks Karlie has managed to get so used to Taylor being next to her in bed that she automatically reaches for her every morning as she wakes up, only to find the other side of the bed empty and cold. Sometimes Karlie wonders how she managed to live there by herself before Taylor came into her life.

It is still early in the morning when Karlie makes her way to work on the second day of shooting. Entering the imposing old factory building where the shoot is, she keeps up her quick pace until she reaches the makeshift room that they've set up for hair and makeup. Several other girls are in there already, drowsing in their chairs, checking their phones or reading the morning news. 

“It’s really cold outside today,” Karlie says as she takes her long woolen coat off and drops it onto a black couch behind them. “Do we have any coffee anywhere? I feel like I need something to heat myself up a bit.”

The young woman who is Karlie’s makeup artist during the shoot, Ana, points to a small table right behind her. “There’s a pot right there. It was just made fresh a few minutes ago.”

“I got here just in time then,” Karlie replies cheerfully and walks over to grab a cup. “Anyone else want one?”

As it turns out, no one does, so Karlie just pours herself one before she sits down in her makeup chair.

She sips her coffee slowly while warming her hands on the mug. Her hair stylist, Lucy, gets to work immediately and Ana waits for a few minutes, letting Karlie finish her coffee before starting on her makeup.

“Hey Karlie,” Ana starts, “you’re friends with Taylor Swift, right?”

Karlie can feel her heart beat a little bit faster at the mention of Taylor’s name and she smiles to herself. “Yeah, that’s right,” she answers, meeting Ana’s gaze in the mirror. 

“Is it true that her and Calvin Harris broke up? I read earlier that apparently he said something to a chick at his New Year’s Eve party or whatever, and I mean, you're friends so I thought you might know...?” 

Ana’s question catches Karlie completely off-guard. The question, and subsequently the truth behind it, dangling right in front of Ana, makes Karlie want to squirm in her seat, but she has to stay still so Lucy can finish doing what she needs to do with her hair. She takes a deep breath, trying to calm herself down, hesitating for what feels like minutes before answering. 

“Hm…” she starts out with, “you know I like you, Ana, but I don't really want to talk about that. I can't confirm or deny. She’s my friend and I can’t betray her trust like that. It's private, you know?” 

As soon as the words leave her mouth, Karlie hopes Ana won’t take them the wrong way, that she didn't sound too harsh. The last thing she wants to do is to offend someone she has to work with, even if she was asking about things that were none of her business. When Ana walks up to her to start her makeup and just smiles and nods at her, replying “No, I totally understand that. I’m sure it’s just a rumor anyway, right? It’s probably just the rumor of the week for her,” Karlie lets out a small sigh of relief for not having messed that up.

“You know, I also heard another funny rumor that said Taylor and Calvin broke up because you and Taylor are dating,” Ana continues cheerfully, not noticing the way Karlie's body immediately tenses up at those words.

“I’m sorry, you heard what?” Karlie asks slowly, trying her best to stay as calm as possible even though she is sure her heart is thumping so loudly everyone can hear it. “Fuck fuck fuck”, she thinks to herself, “don’t blow it, Karlie. Breathe.”

Ana just laughs, seemingly oblivious to the storm raging inside of Karlie’s body as Karlie sits as still as she possibly can.

“I know right? You and Taylor dating? How crazy is that?” Ana says with a laugh and Karlie bites her lip nervously.

“Wouldn’t that be juicy?” Karlie manages to get out in a somewhat normal voice. “Control yourself, for God’s sake,” she tells herself and takes another deep breath.

“I think that coffee warmed you up just a little bit too much,” Ana remarks suddenly, laughing. “You’re sweating.”

“Fuck,” Karlie thinks, but laughs too. “Yeah, that and that heater over there, and that curling iron Lucy just used on me.”

“We can open a window if you’d like,” Lucy chimes in from behind her.

“No, that’s okay,” Karlie just replies, “I’m sure the other girls would be cold. I should be back to normal in a second, just continue what you were doing.” 

Karlie sends the girls a smile through the mirror and picks up her phone. Soon, Lucy and Ana are chitchatting over her head while she checks the news, trying to keep her breathing steady and bring her heartbeat back to normal. 

***

After a long day of shooting, Karlie is on her way home from work.

She enters her apartment after a long cab ride being stuck in traffic and dumps her bag straight down on the floor. Walking into the kitchen to grab some orange juice, she looks around in the dim apartment. It feels cold to her all of a sudden, empty, different than what it used to feel like just a few short months ago. 

Quickly finishing her glass of juice, she walks to the couch, kicks off her shoes and sinks into the comfortable pillows. She listens to the faint ticking of the wall clock in the kitchen that pierces through the silence and she feels uneasy, the silence pushing into her from all sides. 

Karlie feels the day’s strain overpower her and tears are threatening to form in her eyes as she wishes Taylor was there with her to make the day better. Pulling out her phone, she quickly facetimes Taylor, hoping she will pick up.

“Hey babe,” Taylor says happily as she picks up, but her face falls quickly into a face of concern when she sees Karlie’s sad face. “Oh no, what’s wrong?” 

“I just miss you,” Karlie mumbles, her voice trembling a little as she tries to control herself. Seeing Taylor’s concerned expression makes the tears threaten just a little harder and soon her eyes overflow, tears flowing in small rivers down her face.

“Oh babe,” Taylor says soothingly, “tell me what’s wrong.”

Karlie dries her tears with the back of her hand but more keep coming. “I’m just tired,” she manages to say, “and it was such a long day at work.” She takes a deep breath, wiping her tears away again, trying to calm herself enough to speak in coherent sounds. Taylor doesn’t push her into speaking, she waits patiently for Karlie to continue speaking on her own terms, and only makes soothing sounds, telling Karlie everything will be okay. 

Karlie takes another breath and exhales loudly. “Okay,” she says quietly, her voice feeling steadier now, “it’s so weird to be here without you, and I was already missing you when I got to work so you were already on my mind, but then my makeup artist started asking about you, saying how she heard you and Adam were broken up, and when I said I wouldn’t comment on that because you’re my friend then she just jokingly said that she had also heard that we were dating, and I know she was saying it to confirm how crazy the rumors about you are, but I got all sweaty and nervous and it was on my mind the entire day and I was so scared I gave something away, did something I shouldn’t have, and I don’t even know why I did that, why I was suddenly so worried about it, I just miss you a lot and I wish you were here.” 

She pauses for a second and looks down into her lap. “Sorry, I'm rambling.”

“No, no, no,” Taylor says, “don’t apologize. It sounds like you had a crap day and I’m so sorry that happened to you. I know the rumors can be a bit much but you’ve done so well.” She gives Karlie a sympathetic smile. “Don’t feel bad, Kar, you're totally allowed to panic about these things. God knows I’ve done that far too many times. Everything will be okay tomorrow, I promise.”

“I wish you were here,” Karlie mumbles.

“I know, me too. I’ll come home tomorrow and I’ll make you hot chocolate and kiss everything better.” She smiles and Karlie can’t help but smile a little too. “There you are,” Taylor says, “there’s my sunshine girl.”

“I love you,” Karlie says, her voice carrying a trace of optimism.

“I love you too, more than you will ever know,” Taylor replies. “Talk later, okay? Mom just yelled out dinner is ready.”

“Okay,” Karlie says. “Say hi to the family.”

“I will,” Taylor says, “oh, and Karlie?”

“Yeah?”

“I miss you too.”


	10. Chapter 10

It is dark when Karlie exits the old factory building after her third day of shooting. She’s tired, but feeling a little better than the night before. Knowing that Taylor is probably waiting for her at home puts a smile on her face as she walks out through the doors and sets off down the street to find a cab. 

As she rounds the corner, she sees a shadow in the corner of her eye.

“Miss Kloss,” a dark voice says, causing her head to turn abruptly, gazing suspiciously around to figure out who it is.

Realizing who it is her gaze softens. “Oh, hey Bruce,” she says with a smile, recognizing him as one of Taylor’s frequently used body guards.

“Miss Kloss, would you come with me, please?” Bruce asks and signals for her to walk beside him. 

“Of course,” Karlie says, and lets Bruce lead her around another corner towards a black SUV. 

Even though the SUV’s windows are tinted and Karlie can’t see who is inside, she can’t help but smile, knowing that Taylor is looking at her right now. She hurries towards the car, quickly dragging her fingers through her hair to make sure the wind didn’t mess it up, even though she knows the amount of hair product in it should make it stay perfectly still until she washes it again. 

The door opens just as she reaches for the handle and Taylor’s smiling face looks out at her, her hand reaching towards Karlie. Karlie stops for a second to look around her, making sure no one other than Taylor and her security guards can see them, before she takes Taylor’s hand and crawls into the seat next to her, Bruce shutting the car door firmly behind her. 

Her hands go immediately to Taylor’s face, pulling the blonde in for a kiss. She feels tears pressing on her eyelids while they kiss, and it doesn’t take long before the tears are freely flowing down Karlie’s face, leaving wet streaks in her makeup. 

“Aww, baby,” Taylor murmurs as she breaks away from their kiss and dries Karlie’s tears away with her thumbs before she leans in to kiss her nose. 

“I’m fine,” Karlie says quietly, “I just missed you a lot.”

“I know you did,” Taylor replies, pulling the taller girl in for a hug. “But I’m here now. Let’s go home and drink hot chocolate, okay? Hot chocolate always cheers me up.” She looks at Karlie with a hopeful smile.

Karlie nods and smiles back. “Okay,” she whispers and hugs Taylor again, refusing to let go of her.

“Is there anything you need from your apartment? We can go there and get stuff before we go home,” Taylor says, but Karlie just shakes her head.

“No, I have everything I need.”

“Alright,” Taylor says before she turns towards the two security guards sitting in the front seats of the car. “Take us home, guys.”

***

An hour later, the two girls are lounging in front of the TV, watching old episodes of Friends. Taylor is sitting in the right corner of the couch, and Karlie is sprawled out on the entire couch, her head resting in Taylor’s lap. Taylor still has her large mug of hot chocolate in one hand, and Karlie’s is on the table, already empty.

“I’m scared I’ll spill hot chocolate on you and scald your pretty face,” Taylor whines with a pout.

“I’m sure you’ll be fine,” Karlie says with a smile. 

Taylor strokes Karlie’s hair as she carefully sips her cocoa. “Are you feeling better? More sunshiney?” she asks optimistically.

Karlie turns her head and looks up at Taylor. “I am,” she says, “you always make me feel better. I'm so happy we're in such a good place.”

“Good!” Taylor says with a smile. “I need your sunshine in my life, you know, and I’m going to do whatever I can to help prevent these things from happening to you. I don’t want you to have to feel like that ever again, even though I know I can’t protect you from everything. But I will at least try.”

“So what are you planning on doing?” Karlie asks.

“I’ll have Tree release a statement that Adam and I are in fact breaking up, or have broken up, or however she’ll word it. And after that it will be just you and me, sunshine. We can do this together.” Taylor smiles and Karlie smiles back, feeling comforted by Taylor’s words.

“I love you,” Karlie says quietly, her green eyes staring up at Taylor’s blue. 

“I know,” Taylor replies, “and I love you too.”

***

Two weeks later, Karlie is out having lunch with Josh. The sun is shining brightly outside as the two are sitting by the window in a small Manhattan café, drinking coffee and eating pasta. 

“I thought you would never want to be seen in public with me again, now that T. and Adam are finally over and you two can be free to do your thing,” Josh says jokingly. 

Karlie smacks his arm playfully. “Oh, shut up. You’re my best friend; of course I want to be seen with you. You won’t get rid of me that easily.”

Just as Josh is about to reply, Karlie’s phone rings and she puts up a finger so as to say “hold that thought”. She shoots him a smile just as she picks up the phone, and he returns it. 

“Hello, this is Karlie speaking.”

“Oh, hello Karlie. This is Lauren from the Make A Wish Foundation.”

“Lauren! Hi,” Karlie says, remembering the previous time she spoke with her. “How are you?”

“I’m fine, thank you, and yourself?”

“Yeah, I'm doing great, thank you.”

“So Karlie, I’m calling you, well… you obviously understand why I'm calling you, it’s the Make A Wish Foundation obviously.”

Karlie chuckles. “Yeah, I assumed that it wasn't just a social call. What can I help you with?”

“First I just want to tell you the girls absolutely loved you. You were great with them and I know they both had a wonderful time.”

“I enjoyed spending time with them too. They are beautiful girls,” Karlie says, smiling now as she recalls the day she spent with the two girls who wanted to be a model for a day. 

“That’s wonderful,” Lauren says, “because I have another girl whose wish is to meet you and Taylor Swift for a day. Do you think you could make this girl’s wish come true?”

“Of course, I would love to. I have a million things on my schedule, as usual, but we'll make it work. Have you spoken to Taylor about this too?”

“To be perfect honest with you, Karlie, we have tried to. I got in touch with her team a few days ago, but they haven’t gotten back to me yet. I figured I should speak to her first, she’s such a busy woman and a hard one to get in touch with, so that’s why I haven’t called you sooner.”

“No, I totally understand that.” 

“I was wondering though, I know you are friends with Taylor and I was hoping you could talk to her about it, maybe get her to get in contact with us?” 

“Yeah, sure,” Karlie says, “but I could just send you her number or something and you could go directly to her instead of going through her team. I’m sure she’ll say yes, she’s lovely like that.”

“That would be amazing,” Lauren says happily. 

“Just send me your e-mail address and I’ll send it to you asap, alright? And I’ll call you tomorrow once I’ve spoken to her to figure out when we can do this.”

“That sounds great. I’ll send you that address right away. Thank you so much, Karlie. Can’t wait to see you again.”

“Likewise! Alright, call you tomorrow. Bye.”

Karlie hangs up and promptly checks her e-mail to quickly send Taylor’s number to Lauren.

“Are you sure that was wise?” Josh interrupts her thoughts, and she looks at him quizzically. 

“What do you mean?” she asks, not sure what he’s talking about.

“You just sent Taylor’s number to a woman Taylor doesn’t know. Taylor Swift’s number… to a woman she does not know…” He looks at her, waiting for it to click.

“Oh,” she says, “fuck. I didn’t actually think that one through. Oh shit. She’s going to freak out.”

Josh puts his hand on Karlie’s for a few seconds. “Just tell her you didn’t think it through. I'm sure it'll be fine.”

***

An hour later, Karlie walks into Taylor’s apartment and finds Taylor sitting in the kitchen with a mug of tea in front of her. Her blue eyes stare icily at Karlie and Karlie swallows hard before sitting down next to Taylor.

“Why is it I just got a phone call, on my personal cell phone, from a woman who said you gave her my number?” Taylor asks, her voice so sharp it hits Karlie like a knife carving through her skin.

Karlie swallows again, her brain going in circles, trying to find the words to explain.

“Err…” she says, “I wasn’t actually thinking when I did that.” 

“You weren’t thinking?” Taylor asks, her voice getting louder. “Karlie! You can’t just give my phone number to a bunch of strangers. You KNOW how many times I have to change that stupid thing, and you KNOW how much I hate it.”

“I know,” Karlie mumbles, “but I really wasn’t. She was just saying to me how she had gotten in contact with your team and they hadn’t gotten back to her, and she wanted me to talk to you and I figured if she would just call you directly, then you could get back to her.”

“Which is obviously why she straight up assumed I would do this thing.” Taylor's icy stare cuts into Karlie's insides, making her squirm and look away. “Just because we’re dating doesn’t mean you can promise things for me, Karlie. You can’t just tell people “oh I’m sure she’ll do it” and I’ll do it.”

“But…” Karlie says weakly, her voice quivering and tears threatening to appear at any second. She bites her lip trying not to cry, and looks down into her hands.

“But I would do it anyway, right? Of course I would, but that’s not the point, Karlie. This adds pressure, okay? Like I HAVE to do it instead of just wanting to do it. It’s not fair to me, Karlie, and it’s not fair to whoever is asking.”

Karlie looks up at Taylor with tears in her eyes. “I’m sorry,” she whispers and gets up from her chair. “I’m going to go for a walk,” she mumbles as she turns and walks towards the front door.

“Fine,” Taylor says, “go. Do whatever.”

***

Karlie runs down the stairs of Taylor’s building, trying not to let her eyes brim over with tears. In the back of her mind somewhere, her brain is trying to alert her that there might be paparazzi waiting, but she shoves the thought away and runs out the door.

She slows her pace after a few minutes, wiping her eyes on her sleeves, hoping no one has paid attention to the fact that she’s been crying while running down the street. She regrets leaving in the middle of a fight like that, especially when she was the one who messed up to begin with, but she had to get out of there, had to get some fresh air. Fighting with Taylor is horrible, and a rarity – thinking back, Karlie can only recall fighting with Taylor three other times ever since they first got together. 

As Karlie walks aimlessly around the neighborhood, not really knowing where she should go, her brain replays the fight over and over again. “How could I have been so stupid?” she thinks to herself, wishing she could go back and do it differently- not give Taylor’s number out to a woman Karlie herself has only met twice before, and not tell her she was sure Taylor would be up for it. “Stupid,” she mutters out loud, and immediately hopes no one around her thought she was talking to them.

She looks at her watch, wondering how long it's been since she ran out of Taylor’s apartment. She wants to go home, to apologize properly, but isn’t sure how long Taylor will be upset with her for and the last thing she wants to do is walk straight back into a heated situation. She’d rather wait for it to deflate so she can apologize sincerely and calmly. 

Looking around, she spots a convenience store on the corner. Going in, she picks up Taylor’s favorite chocolate and buys two of them, wanting to give them to Taylor when she apologizes. She figures chocolate won't solve their problems, but it won't hurt. Just as she leaves the store, chocolates in her hand, her phone rings. Looking at it, she sees that it is Taylor calling her and she immediately feels her heart beating a little faster, her hands feeling a little clammier. 

“Hey…” she says quietly.

“Hey,” Taylor replies, her voice fading into silence. 

Karlie gulps, a million thoughts running through her mind but not a single one wanting to come out.

Taylor breaks the silence first. “I’m sorry for raising my voice at you. Please come home, Karlie, we need to talk about this.”

“I’m sorry too,” Karlie says softly, “I messed up. It won’t happen again.”

“I know you are, sunshine,” is all Taylor says.

Even though she knows she's not in the clear yet, Karlie has to smile a little at Taylor calling her sunshine. It lets her know they'll be okay, eventually. She still feels horrible about the whole situation, but now at least she feels like she's calm enough to make it home without crying.

“I’ll be there in ten,” she replies, “I love you.”

There is a short pause at the other end of the phone, and Karlie feels her heartbeat speed up nervously when she thinks Taylor might not say it back this time, wondering if she has really messed up that badly. But finally Taylor speaks. “I love you too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THE PAIN. IT HURTS.


	11. Chapter 11

When Karlie walks through the door, Taylor is waiting for her. She walks over and embraces Karlie in a long hug that Karlie never wants to end.

“What’s this?” Taylor asks as she breaks away from the hug and nods towards the chocolates in Karlie’s hand. 

“Uhhh…” Karlie says, her gaze going from the chocolates to Taylor’s face. “Peace offering?” 

Taylor doesn’t say anything, but she cocks her eyebrow at Karlie and pairs it off with a glare. “Do you really think you can bribe your way out of this situation with my favorite chocolate?”

“No, I’m just joking,” Karlie mumbles, “I don’t know. It just sort of happened. I saw it and bought it, I know it's not going to fix… Never mind. Forget the chocolate. You don’t have to eat it.”

Taylor relaxes slightly and gives her a small smile. “We can eat it later. Please come sit down with me so we can talk about this.”

Taylor walks into the living room and sits down on the couch, Karlie following close behind her. She pulls her feet in under her as she sits opposite Taylor on the couch, dreading what’s to come.

“Do you want to go first?” Taylor asks her, giving her the opportunity to apologize before Taylor says what’s on her mind.

Karlie nods. Taking a deep breath, she tries to collect her thoughts a little. “I know that what I say right now won’t fix the mistake I just made,” she starts out, her voice coming out a little wobbly. Taking another deep breath, she tries to control the shakiness of her voice as she continues. “But I realize how serious this is and I apologize, sincerely, for being so stupid and not thinking. I don't really understand what was going on in my head when I did that and if I could, I would go back and do it differently, in a heartbeat. I am so, so sorry, it will never happen again, I promise.” 

Karlie’s hands are clammy and she can feel the adrenaline pumping through her body as she anxiously waits for Taylor to reply. She can see that Taylor is thinking and the stern look on her face makes Karlie feel nervous.

Eventually Taylor lets out a sigh. “I accept your apology,” she says slowly, “and I believe you when you say you realize the severity of the situation, because this can’t happen again, Karlie. Ever.” 

Karlie nods, bravely meeting Taylor’s gaze, finding it softer than she expected it to be.

“I know it’s sometimes easy to forget we’re not a regular couple because what we have feels so normal, like I’m just a normal person with a normal life, but as long as we are together, we will never be a regular couple. You will never be able to just give out my info to anyone, or to talk about me or us openly to just anyone. There will always be certain limitations in place.”

“I know,” Karlie replies quietly.

Taylor sends her a gaze filled with sympathy. “I know that you know that, Karlie, and I know you are sorry, but this is so serious. I’m trying not to be furious with you because I know you didn’t do this on purpose, it was an honest mistake and it happens. And that’s also why I know I need to say these things, even though I shouldn’t have to, because mistakes happen all the time, we’re only human.”

Taylor reaches out her hand and grabs hold of Karlie’s, stroking it softly. “I have already arranged for my old number to be turned off and I should be getting a new one later today. I know Lauren's probably harmless, she's a professional and she sounded nice, but I can't take that risk.”

“I won’t give it to anyone, I promise,” Karlie whispers, not trusting her voice enough to say it out loud.

“I know,” Taylor says and looks away, seemingly considering what else she should say.

“Do you want me to sleep in my own apartment tonight?” Karlie asks quietly, her voice filled with sadness and anxiety.

“No,” Taylor says and shakes her head. “I’m upset with you, but I don’t want you to leave. That won’t solve anything. I’ll get over it eventually.” She sends Karlie a small, but reserved, smile. “What I do want is for us to go to the kitchen and make pancakes and think about something else. What do you think?”

Karlie nods, trying to send Taylor a small smile, but failing miserably. “You go ahead, I just need a second.”

Taylor gets up from her seat and puts her arm around Karlie’s back, giving her a squeeze and pressing a kiss to her hair before walking to the kitchen. Karlie takes some deep breaths, holding her arms firmly around her legs to calm herself down before she finally gets up to join Taylor in the kitchen. 

***

Karlie wakes up the next morning after a restless night. Yesterday’s events had caused Taylor to keep her distance most of the night. They had made pancakes together and tried to joke around, but the silences had been awkward and the room had felt colder than usual. Taylor had even kept her distance when they went to bed, lying on her side with her back towards Karlie. It wasn’t until Karlie was absolutely sure Taylor was asleep that Taylor had taken Karlie’s hand and placed it on her stomach, nudging Karlie closer to her for a cuddle. Whether it had been for Karlie’s comfort or for Taylor’s, Karlie wasn’t sure. She had spent most of the night replaying their fight, dozing off every now and then but every time she woke up she felt like she'd hardly slept at all. 

A few careful rays of daylight dance on their bedroom wall and Karlie takes a deep breath, trying to get more comfortable without disturbing a sleeping Taylor. 

“Turn that frown upside down, Karlie,” Taylor suddenly mumbles, her back still pressed against Karlie, sounding like she was half-asleep still.

“But… what?” Karlie splutters, wondering how Taylor even knew. 

Taylor turns around under the covers, facing Karlie now. “Kar… You’re upset, I can feel it. Your sadness clings to every single thing in this room, including me.” She puts a hand to Karlie’s face and strokes her cheek, and Karlie struggles to not burst into tears. “I’m not angry anymore,” Taylor continues and kisses Karlie softly, “so please cheer up. Everything is fine.”

Karlie nods and gives Taylor an unsure smile, causing Taylor to lean in and kiss her again. Taylor places kisses on her lips first, moving on to her cheeks and her nose, all while keeping one hand on Karlie’s face.

Leaning back, Taylor looks into Karlie’s green eyes, but Karlie can’t hold her intense gaze for long and looks away. 

“I don’t know if I can,” Karlie mumbles awkwardly. 

“Kar…” Taylor says, taking Karlie’s hand and kissing it softly, “tell me why you’re so sad.”

Karlie sighs, feeling the tears coming again. “I just… I don’t know,” she says, sighing again.

“I don’t believe that,” Taylor says softly, “come on, sunshine. You can talk to me.”

Karlie hesitates, not entirely sure how to scramble her thoughts together into a coherent reason for her sadness, but she tries. “I think it’s just the magnitude of this catching up with me,” she says quietly.

“What do you mean by ‘this’?” Taylor asks, a slight trace of nervousness just barely noticeable beneath the soft, comforting way she's speaking to Karlie.

“This, as in us, our relationship. It’s just… Sometimes I forget that my beautiful, weird, clumsy, caring girlfriend named Taylor is actually THE Taylor Swift, the Taylor Swift who comes in a package deal with stalkers, crazy fangirls and the media who is obsessed with her. And the fact that I forget that sometimes kind of scares me more than I wish it did.” 

Karlie keeps her gaze away from Taylor’s, not wanting to see her reaction in case it’s a bad one. But Taylor strokes Karlie’s hair to get Karlie to look at her and Karlie sees that Taylor is looking at her with soft and caring eyes. 

“But Karlie,” Taylor says softly, “don’t you see that this is why this relationship has a real chance of actually lasting? You see me for who I am, unlike the rest of the world who only sees a persona, a public figure they can say whatever they want about. The fact that you forget that I am THE Taylor Swift, the fact that I’m just your girlfriend named Taylor, that’s a good thing. Sure, there are some things that will always be different, but different doesn’t have to mean bad.” She flashes a hopeful smile at Karlie and after a few seconds, Karlie tentatively returns it.

All of a sudden, Taylor practically jumps up and out of bed, a mysterious smile spreading on her face. Karlie sits up in bed, her eyebrows knit in confusion as she stares at Taylor. “What?” she asks skeptically.

“Get dressed, I have a plan,” Taylor just says as she hurries to her closet to find clothes.

“Okay…” Karlie says slowly, but gets up and pulls on a pair of jeans, following Taylor into the closet to find a shirt. “What’s the plan?”

“You need a day of normalcy,” Taylor says happily, “so today we are going to be absolutely normal, or at least as close to normal as we can be, me being me and all. We are going to do normal things, such as taking a walk in the park or going to a museum or I don’t know, normal things!”

Karlie is speechless where she is standing next to the enthusiastic girl zooming around in the apartment, finding things they will need for their normal day out.

“You would actually do that for me?” she finally asks, skepticism coloring her voice.

“I would do anything to make you happy, and this is what you need today to be happy, so yes. I would absolutely do that for you,” Taylor says with a grin before she plants a kiss on Karlie’s lips. “You can even hold my hand if you want, but Tree might kill us afterwards,” she whispers into Karlie’s ear, “but you know, if that’s what you need, you’re allowed to.”

Karlie stares at her in disbelief. “You’re crazy,” she mutters, but the thought of it makes Karlie’s insides dance happily and for the first time since their fight, her smile reaches her eyes.

“See, I knew you would like that,” Taylor says with a grin, clearly pleased with herself. 

Karlie is still smiling as she shakes her head at Taylor. It’s amazing to her how Taylor always knows exactly how to cheer her up. 

Halfway down the stairs, Taylor stops and turns towards Karlie. “So what will it be, sunshine? What normal thing would you like to do today?”

Karlie thinks about it for a second. She know how much Taylor is sacrificing for her right now, putting on a brave face and putting Karlie’s needs first, even though it probably freaks her out more than she’s willing to admit, and Karlie wants to meet her halfway.

“How about we just go out for breakfast?” she suggests, and adds “No handholding,” noticing an immediate effect in Taylor’s posture. It’s like she stands up just a little straighter, like she just got out of something she didn’t really want to do.

“Are you sure that’s all you want to do?” Taylor asks her, and Karlie nods.

“Absolutely,” she replies. “I really appreciate the sentiment, Tay. I would love to go outside in the park with you, holding your hand and forgetting about the paparazzi and the media and the gawking fans and the prying eyes, but let’s not get ahead of ourselves. Breakfast is good.”

“Okay,” Taylor says with a grin. “Any place in particular you want to go?”

“We could go to Hu Kitchen. Their breakfast menu is amazing!”

“Hu Kitchen it is,” Taylor says with a quick nod. “I’ll call Kevin and let him know of our plans. Can you feed Meredith and Olivia before we go?”

“Sure,” Karlie says and hurries to the kitchen. Opening a cabinet, she finds their food and pours it in their bowls. “Kitties, food!” she calls out, shaking the box to grab their attention and soon enough, both of the cats come running into the kitchen. 

Karlie bends down to pet Olivia just as Taylor pokes her head in. “Ready to go?” she asks and Karlie nods.

Grabbing her phone and her bag, she takes Taylor’s hand and they exit the apartment, walking down the stairs hand in hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Giving a shout out to my BFF & beta reader, tumblr user talktomeintiptoes, who gave me the name for the restaurant. She's been there irl, they have amazing, healthy food and it's in Karlie's general part of town.


	12. Chapter 12

“And you just decided that if she wanted to hold your hand in public, she could?” Tree asks suspiciously.

It is three days after Karlie and Taylor’s public breakfast date and Tree is sitting with them in Taylor’s kitchen, papers laid out in front of her, holding a steaming cup of coffee.

“It was what she needed to hear!” Taylor says defensively and looks over at Karlie affectionately. 

“Well, I’m glad Karlie said no because she spared me a whole lot of cleanup. I mean, we haven’t even released the statement about the breakup yet. Imagine what a headache that would have been. _’Taylor Swift cheating on Calvin Harris with her female BFF.’_ “

Karlie chuckles at Tree’s comment. “That would have been a new one, Taylor cheating on Adam.”

“Not one I would have liked all that much, I admit,” Taylor says thoughtfully. 

Karlie takes Taylor’s hand and kisses it softly. “It doesn’t matter now, though,” she says with a smile.

“You’re right,” Taylor replies and looks over at Tree, “we have more pressing issues to discuss today.”

“Right,” Tree says, and fiddles with her papers, looking for a particular one, “there are two things we need to deal with today. The first one is this.” She places a piece of paper in front of Taylor and Karlie.

Karlie quickly skims the short statement, nodding to herself as she reads.

“As you can see, this is what I will send to Gossip Cop to confirm that you and Adam are actually broken up. There have been quite a few rumors floating around lately. Add up what Adam told that girl on New Year’s Eve, and you not attending his birthday party, and you have a _lot_ of people, fans and otherwise, drawing the conclusion that you’re no longer together. I didn’t think a more elaborate confirmation would be necessary, but if you want to crush the rumors about him cheating on you, I can quickly alter it before I send it out.”

Karlie looks at Taylor, who is clearly weighing her options before answering.

“I think you should just send it out as it is,” Taylor finally says, “those rumors started because he fucked up, and even though he entered into this willingly and has done his part, I am not going to clean up for him. If he wants to deny that he 'cheated on me', he can get his own publicist to clarify. I won't stop him.”

“Okay,” Tree says, “then we’re keeping this statement as it is.”

“When are you sending it to them?” Karlie asks.

“As soon as we finish here,” Tree replies, “which brings me to the second thing. The Grammys are coming up. We should stick to the same strategy that we used for the VMAs last year, meaning you,” she looks at Taylor, “can't just bring Karlie, you should make it a group outing. Have you thought about who you want to bring?”

Taylor squeezes Karlie’s hand under the table as she replies. “Karlie will be one of them, for obvious reasons,” and Tree nods, “Austin also wanted to go, he told me that during Christmas, and then I’m thinking of asking Lily and Selena. Do you think that’s enough? I mean, bringing my brother and three friends shouldn’t be suspicious, right?”

“No, I think that should be fine,” Tree says with a smile. “I’ll let them know that you’re bringing four guests then.”

“Shouldn’t we also talk about that Make-A-Wish Foundation request?” Karlie asks and looks at Taylor.

“Oh, right,” Taylor replies, “yeah, we do need to talk about that.” She looks over at Tree who is writing down some notes for herself. “Have you spoken with Lauren yet?”

“No,” Tree says, “I sent her an e-mail on Friday afternoon after you called me, but I haven’t called her yet. I will do that later today. However, have you two figured out a time we should suggest to them?”

“We were talking about March, right?” Taylor asks, looking over at Karlie.

“Yeah,” Karlie replies, “I have quite a few things scheduled in February so that’s out of the question, but March sounds good, preferably sometime in the first or second week.”

“Okay, we can work with that. I’ll let Lauren know and then I’ll get back to you guys with an idea for a specific time and place once I’ve spoken to her.”

“Awesome,” Karlie says and grins at Taylor, and Taylor returns it. 

***

It’s half an hour later and Karlie is getting ready for a workout appointment with her trainer. Taylor and Tree are still sitting in the kitchen chatting about the statement Tree has just sent out, and Karlie can’t help but smile at how far they have come in just a short year.

As she gets changed, she thinks back on the day almost a full year beforehand when they first talked about Taylor needing a public boyfriend. 

They were attending the Oscar de la Renta show together, celebrating the life of a man Karlie had considered a member of her own family. Sitting closely next to each other in their complimentary dresses, Karlie was glowing, happy that she was able to share this special moment with Taylor. Taylor was shining with pride and confidence, playfully refusing to comment on why she was there with Karlie when a reporter asked her, and the night was going wonderfully until it suddenly wasn't. 

They were mingling after the show, chatting with just about everyone who wanted to chat with them. Mary, the wife of an executive Karlie couldn’t remember the name of, walked over to them. She grabbed onto both Taylor and Karlie’s hands, one in each hand. 

“I have been watching the two of you all night,” she said, “and I wasn’t sure if I should come over to you, but after having seen you two on the cover of Vogue and then to meet you here in the flesh, I told myself “Mary, you don’t get this opportunity every day,” so here I am.” 

Taylor looked at Karlie, a puzzled look in her eyes, and Karlie returned it, wondering what this woman was talking about. 

“You just look so beautiful together. You remind me of me and my husband, the way we used to be when we were young and had just fallen in love with each other. How long have you two been dating?” 

Karlie swallowed hard and glanced at Taylor, who, pale-faced and panic-stricken, had pulled her hand free of Mary’s so suddenly that Mary sensed their confusion even before Karlie spoke up. “What? Oh, no, we’re not dating,” Karlie managed to say, acutely aware of how much Taylor was struggling to keep it together, “we’re just friends. I have a boyfriend actually.”

Mary immediately put her hand over her mouth in embarrassment. “Oh dear,” she said after a few seconds, “I am so sorry. I just assumed… Well, that should teach an old woman like myself not to just say whatever I'm thinking to anyone and everyone,” letting out a short laugh. Squeezing Karlie’s hand once before releasing it, she wished them a lovely evening and excused herself, leaving Karlie alone to deal with a freaked-out Taylor. 

Somehow, she managed to get Taylor through it, slowly making their way towards the exit while making polite small talk with everyone who stopped them and making sure they weren’t touching. 

Once they arrived back at Taylor’s apartment, they didn't have a lot of time before Karlie had to leave again for a Fashion Week dinner with Josh that she couldn't miss. Taylor didn't want to break down before she had to go to her own dinner meeting, so she refused to talk about what had just happened. She promised Karlie she was okay, and that they would talk when they were both home after dinner, wrapping her in one of her own coats against the New York winter chill and sending her off with a quick kiss. The inevitable breakdown happened later that night, and Karlie spent yet another night holding her girlfriend while she cried, trying to calm her down. 

Afterwards, they had decided a public boyfriend was the way to go. As much as Taylor wanted to, she just wasn’t ready for the world to know, to think, to assume they were together, and having a boyfriend would be the best way to prevent that until she was. They had talked it over with Tree, who had done some research, and Adam had been on board with the plan about a week later.

Now, three weeks shy of what would have been a full year of playing pretend, it is finally over and Karlie smiles happily at her own reflection as she thinks about how the future is finally theirs to shape the way they want to. 

***

Karlie finishes her workout session only to find three missed calls from Taylor and a single text message saying “Call me.” She wipes her face with her towel as she dials Taylor, wondering what could be so important that it would warrant three missed calls. 

“Hey babe,” Taylor replies after two rings.

“Hey. What’s up? Is everything okay?” Karlie asks nervously. 

“Yeah, or well, no, not exactly. I mean, I’m fine, but things are not fine. You can’t come home, Karlie.”

“Okay…?” Karlie says, confused. “Did I do something?”

“No, it’s not your fault, Karlie. I’m sorry, I should explain. It’s just that security called me half an hour ago to tell me there is a bunch of paparazzi camped outside, so you can’t come home, not right now, anyway.”  
“Not even through the back?”

“No, they have basically surrounded the building.”

“Shit,” Karlie says quietly, “I… uh… I guess I’ll just go home to my place then.”

“That’s probably a good idea.”

“Do you know when I can come home? I really don’t want to spend the night by myself, not when you’re only 20 minutes away.” 

“We’ll figure something out, Kar. I can have a chat with my security team and see if we can come up with something, okay?” Karlie can hear that Taylor is trying to cheer her up and she smiles to herself.

“Okay. Will you call me back?”

“As soon as I’ve talked to them. I love you, sunshine.”

“I love you too,” Karlie answers and they hang up. 

Karlie jumps in the shower, dreading going home to her own, cold apartment. She and Taylor both knew the breakup would bring consequences of some kind; Karlie had just hoped they wouldn’t be limiting their movements in the city. She had mostly anticipated newspaper headlines and fans freaking out about it online, something that was undoubtedly happening anyway. She stupidly hadn't really considered the paparazzi swooping down on them like vultures upon hearing the news.

She sighs as she gets out of the shower, and just as she wraps the towel around herself, her phone vibrates.

“That was quick,” she says as she picks it up.

“I didn’t want to leave you hanging,” Taylor replies, “I know how much this sucks for you, for both of us.”

“It really does,” Karlie sighs. 

“Hey, what do you say I come to your place tonight?” Taylor suddenly asks, enthusiasm creeping into her voice.

“How are you going to pull that one off?” Karlie asks, amused at the suggestion.

“Well…” Taylor says, “I was going to tell you that my security team will tell the paparazzi I’m not here and I won’t be back tonight either, hoping that they leave, but I might as well actually leave and not come back tonight. The cats are fine on their own for a night, and it will be nice to stay at yours for a change. I’ll wait until they leave; they’re going to have to leave eventually. They need to earn their money somewhere, right?”

“That’s actually not a bad plan,” Karlie admits, “and it _will_ be nice to have you over. I just need to go grab some food first, I doubt there’s much left of anything in my poor, empty apartment.”

“I guess you have been staying here a lot,” Taylor remarks and Karlie laughs.

“You think?” 

Taylor laughs. “I’ll let you know when I’m on my way, okay? Take your time, it’s probably going to be a while.”

“Okay,” Karlie says, “Is there anything in particular you want for dinner?”

“Surprise me,” Taylor replies and Karlie grins. 

“Consider it done,” Karlie says, “Talk later then, princess.”

“Always, my sunshine.”


	13. Chapter 13

Karlie is in the middle of making dinner when Taylor calls to let her know she’s finally on her way. After she hangs up, she leaves the risotto bubbling in the pot while she sets the table, putting out plates and wine glasses and topping it off with several candles.

She dims the lights and lights all of the various candles scattered around her apartment, leaving the ones on the table unlit for now, before turning her attention back to the risotto. 

Minutes later, there is a knock on her door. She shuffles happily to the door and opens it, finding Taylor’s happy, but exhausted, face staring back at her. Grabbing her hand, she pulls her inside, gives a quick nod to her security guards, before she closes the door and pulls Taylor into a kiss.

“I missed you,” she murmurs as she keeps Taylor tightly wrapped up in her arms for a while.

“I saw you five hours ago,” Taylor giggles.

“I don’t care, that is five hours too long.”

“Fair point,” Taylor admits and kisses Karlie again before letting go of the taller girl and trying to make her way towards the kitchen, sniffing audibly. “What are you making? It smells delicious!”

Karlie rushes ahead of Taylor, preventing her from walking into the kitchen to poke around in the food. “No, no, no, don’t. It’s a surprise, remember?” She guides Taylor over to the couch and gently pushes her down on it. “Sit here for just two minutes while I get the last details ready, okay?”

“Fine,” Taylor sighs. “I’ll just sit here and pout until you come get me.”

Karlie laughs and leans in to kiss Taylor on the nose. “Good girl,” she murmurs and pats her on the head.

“Scooch,” Taylor replies and waves a hand at her, mischief twinkling in her eyes and Karlie laughs as she makes her way back to the kitchen.

Karlie takes her time getting the last details just right. She pours the wine into their glasses before she plates up the risotto, and puts the finishing touches on the whole thing by lighting the two candles in the middle of the table. Standing back, she admires her creation before she walks downstairs to find Taylor, who quickly juts out her bottom lip into that same playful pout again when she sees her girlfriend walking towards her. 

She stands in front of Taylor and reaches out her hand, smiling sweetly down at the blonde sitting in front of her. Taylor puts her hand in Karlie’s and just as she stands up, Karlie pulls her into a kiss.

“Just a preview for what’s to come after dinner,” Karlie whispers sweetly into Taylor’s ear before she leads her up the stairs and into the kitchen.

Taylor gasps softly when she sees the table. “Karlie,” she exclaims, “this looks beautiful!”

Karlie beams at Taylor, pleased by her reaction, and holds the chair out for her to sit down on.

“Such a gentlewoman,” Taylor teases as she sits down. She stares at the food with a smile on her face, the candlelight dancing in her eyes. “This looks as good as it smells. What is it?”

“Butternut risotto,” Karlie replies, “and I really hope it is good. I was randomly browsing some food blogs to get some inspiration for tonight and suddenly there it was.”

“I guess we should try it out then,” Taylor says eagerly, and Karlie grins.

“Let’s.”

***

An hour later the empty risotto pot is soaking in the kitchen sink and the bottle of wine is almost empty. The girls are on the couch now sitting opposite each other, feet drawn in under them, each girl holding a freshly refilled wine glass. 

“…and then I checked some of the most vocal fans and they were literally freaking out about it.” Taylor says and laughs. “I feel so sorry for them though, the poor things are so invested and there I go and ruin their entire little fantasy and it’s actually really horrible but it’s so funny!” She shakes with laughter, threatening to spill wine all over Karlie’s couch. 

Karlie laughs as she reaches out a hand to take Taylor’s wine glass away from her, putting it down on the coffee table in front of them along with her own. “You’re drunk and I love it,” she says with a grin and Taylor giggles.

“What? I am not!” she protests, but the smile on her face doesn’t fade. “Okay, maybe I'm a little tipsy,” she admits after Karlie stares at her with a knowing smile.

A shade of crimson spreads across Taylor’s cheeks as Karlie continues looking at her, fully aware what her stare is doing to Taylor. The tip of Taylor’s tongue sticks out of her mouth ever so slightly, slowly licking her lips while she’s holding Karlie’s gaze. Karlie smiles just a little bit more and soon enough Taylor can’t hold it together anymore, practically launching herself across the couch and pinning Karlie down. 

She kisses her fiercely, nibbling on Karlie’s bottom lip in between long kisses as her right hand slips under Karlie’s shirt. Her nails drag across Karlie’s skin and Karlie lets out a throaty growl that only makes Taylor kiss her even harder. Slipping her other hand under Karlie’s shirt as well, she quickly and efficiently removes the shirt completely and flings it aside, letting it drop unceremoniously onto the living room floor. Taylor’s lips caress Karlie’s breasts as softly as she can, raising goosebumps all over Karlie’s body. Karlie arches just slightly from the sensation and Taylor takes it as permission to keep going, quickly slipping her right hand into Karlie’s pants, causing Karlie’s body to jolt. 

“Do you want to try something new?” Taylor asks, her voice husky with lust. She stares down at Karlie, her blue eyes shining in the candlelight. 

“What did you have in mind?” Karlie asks breathlessly, wishing Taylor would stop teasing her.

Taylor just smiles a smile full of mischief and gets up, dragging Karlie up from the couch. 

“Grab a candle,” she instructs her as she picks one up from the table in front of them.

Karlie picks up the second candle from the table and follows her, but when Taylor starts leading them past the kitchen and up the stairs to the second floor, she stops and stares at her in confusion. “Wait, what do we need the candles for?” she asks, but Taylor doesn’t answer. She just winks at Karlie, a wicked smile spreading across her face. 

Karlie can see she’s not going to get a clear answer from Taylor and wonders what in the world Taylor is up to. She thinks about it for a second, but her desire to continue what they started on the couch quickly wins out over trying to figure out her girlfriend's mind, and she takes a step forward. With a candle in one hand and Taylor’s hand in the other, she lets Taylor lead her upstairs to the bedroom. 

***

Karlie wakes up the next morning with a smile on her face. Taylor’s naked body is snuggled close to hers, their legs intertwined, and Karlie lets her fingers run over Taylor’s arm. Last night had certainly been interesting and Karlie wonders just how difficult it will be to wash all of this candle wax out of her sheets. Looking back, it was a miracle they didn’t set the bed on fire.

Taylor stirs next to her and Karlie leans in close to her and kisses her forehead.

“Hey beautiful,” she whispers and Taylor mumbles something incomprehensible in reply.

“What was that?” Karlie asks softly and Taylor stretches.

“Candle wax,” Taylor repeats and Karlie laughs.

“Where?”

“I think I’m lying on it.” She flashes Karlie a sudden smile and rolls on top of her, snuggling her close. 

“Not anymore,” Karlie says with a laugh. “Last night was… interesting. Very adventurous!”

“Did you enjoy it?” Taylor says, mischief twinkling in her eyes as she looks down at Karlie. 

“I did, more than I thought I would.”

Taylor grins and leans down to plant a kiss on Karlie's lips. “Good. I have to confess that the idea may have crossed my mind once or twice before last night, but I just felt awkward bringing it up because I didn’t want you to think it’s some weird kink I've been hiding from you or something. I just, you know, suddenly the idea was there and I thought it could be fun. Hot. You know..." She pauses and buries her face in Karlie's neck for a second, before collecting herself and looking her in the eye again. "Anyway, I'm really happy I didn't scare you off last night, because I think I was right...” She smiles down at Karlie, somehow simultaneously looking very pleased with herself but still slightly nervous about Karlie's reaction to her confession.

“Wait, so you're telling me you've thought about this before, and yet you're trying to convince me you're _not_ a freak?” Karlie teases, “Taylor Alison Swift, who knew you were hiding such dirty, dirty secrets behind that wholesome all-American image of yours...!”

Taylor laughs and rolls off of Karlie again, her blushing cheeks betraying her embarrassment. “Oh, shut up.”

“I wonder what your fans would say about this if they knew,” Karlie continues, “maybe that’s the first thing I will tell the world once everyone knows we’re together.”

“Oh, you wouldn’t dare,” Taylor replies and pulls Karlie in for another kiss, stopping the playful banter. Pulling back from the kiss, she leans her forehead on Karlie’s. “Waking up next to you is my favorite thing in the world,” she whispers.

“Same here, princess,” Karlie whispers back, “same here.”

***

It’s three days later and Karlie is spending the day at home in Taylor’s apartment, working on an assignment. 

She’s sitting in the kitchen with her planner open and her laptop in front of her, her unfinished assignment waiting for her as she flips through her planner to double-check the deadline. Once she’s found what she’s looking for, she absentmindedly flips through the next few pages when her eyes suddenly focus on a date. "London’s Fabulous Fund Fair", it says on February 20th. She stares at it, getting a feeling there is something she has forgotten to write down, but what? Taylor’s childhood friend Britany is getting married soon, but was that on the 20th or was it the week after? 

Panic slowly begins to creep in as she realizes she may have messed up and agreed to co-host the Fund Fair without realizing she’s supposed to attend a wedding that day.

“Hey babe,” she calls out, “when’s Britany’s wedding again?” She bites her bottom lip as she waits for Taylor’s reply.

“The 20th next month,” Taylor calls back.

“Fuck,” Karlie says under her breath.

“Why?” Taylor says, walking into the kitchen from the den where she had been messing around on her guitar. 

Karlie looks down at her hands as she hesitates, dreading Taylor’s reaction.

“I… uh… seem to have agreed to host an event that night. In London.”

“Oh,” Taylor just says as she sits down next to Karlie. 

Karlie looks up at Taylor, who is gazing into the distance, obviously considering what she wants to say.

“I’m so sorry,” Karlie starts out, but Taylor looks at her with kind eyes and interrupts her.

“You know what? It’s fine. Really!” Taylor’s smile is reassuring, comforting. “In fact, I've been wondering how I would pull off bringing you as my plus-one. Brit obviously knows about us, but most of the guests wouldn’t have a clue that we’re together and might start wondering. I was hoping that the fact that she’s also friends with your sister would sort of be able to explain how she would know you, but... I don't know. People would still be confused. Or suspicious.”

Karlie looks at her, dumbfounded. “Why haven’t you said anything?”

“I didn’t want to worry you,” Taylor says with a shrug. “You know how anxious I get about everything, how I overanalyze everything to find every single thing that could go wrong before I make a decision. I honestly wasn’t going to let it be an issue though.”

“I suppose,” Karlie says, “I still wish you would have told me though.”

“I know,” Taylor says and squeezes Karlie’s hand. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay,” Karlie replies, “I’m just glad you’re not upset that I can’t go with you after all.” 

“What event is this again though?” Taylor asks.

“Oh, it’s that Fund Fair we went to last year.”

“The one with the kissing booth?” Taylor asks, her eyes narrowing as she looks at Karlie.

“That’s the one,” Karlie replies, sending Taylor an innocent grin.

“You better not be kissing all of the girls, Karlie,” Taylor says, and Karlie wraps her arms around Taylor’s neck, holding her close.

“No,” she says right before their lips meet. “Just one.”


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you want some visuals, imagine Karlie in [this teal Pamella Roland Pre-Fall 2016 dress](http://www.vogue.com/fashion-shows/pre-fall-2016/pamella-roland/slideshow/collection#9) and imagine Taylor in [the black Balmain Pre-Fall 2016 suit on the right](http://www.vogue.com/fashion-shows/pre-fall-2016/balmain/slideshow/collection#10), minus the choker.

“Finally alone.” 

Karlie is standing in front of Taylor, slowly licking her lips as her gaze follows Taylor’s every curve. They are alone in Taylor’s dressing room; in fact they’re alone for the first time since Karlie flew in earlier that day. Taylor left for LA a week ago, having some business meetings to take care of before the Grammys, and Karlie stayed in New York for work. The early afternoon has been spent with Lily and Selena and a variety of stylists getting them ready for the red carpet. Now that the red carpet is finished, they can finally spend a few moments together, just the two of them.

“You look amazing in that suit,” Karlie says, her gaze focusing on Taylor and Taylor only.

“You’re one to talk in that amazing dress,” Taylor replies with a grin on her face.

“You know what though?” Karlie asks, mischief twinkling in her eyes, “it would honestly look better crumpled up on the floor.”

Taylor giggles at her cheesy line. “I could make that happen,” she replies with a wink.

Karlie steps forward and cups Taylor’s face with both of her hands. Kissing her softly, she moves forward until Taylor’s legs bump into the couch and she practically falls down into it. Karlie climbs on top of her, pinning Taylor to the couch. “I hate it every time we go a week without seeing each other,” she murmurs softly in between kisses. 

“I hate it too,” Taylor whispers back, her arms wrapped around Karlie’s neck.

Now that she's got her girlfriend where she wants her, Karlie's hands make their way down Taylor's body, flicking open a few of the hooks on her outfit before quickly slipping a hand in under the fabric, feeling the heat of her skin. “I want you so bad right now,” she says, knowing that this is not the place or time for anything too wild to happen, but still unable to resist the temptation. 

“If you can figure out a way for me to get you in and out of that dress in less than five minutes, you’ve got yourself a deal,” Taylor replies with a soft moan, her hands now stroking Karlie’s arms. 

Karlie responds by pushing Taylor sideways and onto her back, positioning herself on top of her. She starts kissing Taylor’s neck, her hands trying to push aside the fabric of her jacket to expose her chest, only to be foiled by the tape that holds it securely to her skin. “This tape is evil, just so you know,” she mutters as she slowly, carefully starts pulling the jacket loose. 

Just as Karlie puts her lips on Taylor’s collarbone, her fingers still busying themselves with the fabric, there’s a knock on the door and the door flings open only a second later.

“…won’t mind, I’m sure,” they hear Austin say as he enters the room, a teenage girl trailing behind him. 

They respond as quickly as they can, Taylor quickly wrapping her arms around her chest, pure shock on her face, as Karlie struggles to get up, pushing herself off of Taylor with a hand that slips on the slick leather couch causing her to fall back down on top of her.

“Oh my God, I can’t leave you two alone anywhere,” Austin yells embarrassedly. 

Karlie finally manages to get off of Taylor and stands up from the couch. She can feel her cheeks turn crimson as her stare moves from Austin to the wide-eyed teenage girl standing behind him to Taylor, who is panic-stricken and bright red.

The four of them stand there in a heavy silence. Karlie finally looks at Taylor, who avoids her gaze and stares intently at the floor. 

“I knew it!” the teenage girl suddenly blurts out and a grin spreads across her face.

“No, we weren’t…” Karlie starts out, flustered that she can’t come up with a decent explanation for what the girl just walked in on without giving them away entirely. 

“Oh no, you were,” the girl replies, a smug look on her face now, “I’m 17, I know what I saw.”

“Er…” Karlie says, startled by the girl's boldness, but before she can figure out what to say, Taylor interrupts her.

“Excuse me,” she says sharply and zooms past Karlie, her arms still covering her chest. She grabs Austin’s arm and pulls him off to the side of the room, leaving Karlie alone with the teenage girl.

Karlie sends her a sheepish smile. “Hey, what’s your name?” she asks the girl, not knowing what else to really say.

“Alexa.”

“Hey Alexa, I’m Karlie,” Karlie says with a sigh. 

“Yeah, I know,” Alexa replies and flashes Karlie a huge smile.

“I’m sorry for… uh... well, all this,” Karlie says, her hand circling the room, but Alexa just giggles.

“Don’t be. This is the best thing that's ever happened to me.”

“Uh…” Karlie says, not knowing how to respond to that. This is definitely one of the worst things that has ever happened to her.

In the background she can hear Taylor berating Austin in hushed tones. 

“..Can’t just… Now this girl knows… hell were you thinking?” 

“Not _this_ anyway,” Austin replies in a louder voice, causing both Karlie and Alexa to turn and stare at them. 

Taylor rolls her eyes and lets out a loud sigh. “Fine,” she sneers at him, “go find Tree.”

She effectively dismisses him by abruptly turning her back on him to fix her outfit before she walks over to Karlie and Alexa. 

Karlie gives Taylor a cautious smile, trying to assess the situation before she introduces Alexa. Taylor stops a couple of steps away from Karlie, clearly not comfortable with the situation. She’s visibly picking at her fingers, and Karlie knows this is something she does when she’s nervous.

“This is Alexa,” Karlie says in an attempt to keep the awkward silences to a minimum.

“Hi,” Taylor says and flashes Alexa a smile that doesn’t quite reach her eyes. “I’m sorry about before.”

“Are you kidding me?” Alexa says, “I’m the one who should be sorry. I clearly walked in on something I wasn’t supposed to walk in on.”

Karlie swallows thickly as she thinks to herself just how right the girl is.

“Here I was freaking out about meeting you,” she continues, looking at Taylor, “but I didn’t imagine meeting you like this and just, whoa…”

Taylor fidgets nervously as she considers what to say next. She looks at Karlie, her gaze betraying how shaken she is, and all Karlie wants to do is to close the distance between them so she can put her arm around Taylor’s back and give her a reassuring squeeze. Instead she nods her head, giving her permission to say exactly what she needs to say.

Taylor returns the nod and looks at Alexa again. “Hey, so, I really need you to not tell _anyone_ about what just happened. I,“ she looks at Karlie, “we, want to keep this private for now. Do you think you can do that for us?”

“Oh, dude, yeah, totally,” Alexa says, her face serious now, “I totally get it. It's just funny, you know, because I ship you guys so much, but seriously, don’t worry, I promise I’ll keep my mouth shut.”

As she's talking, Austin knocks and walks back into the room, Tree following close behind. 

“Thank you,” Taylor says to Alexa, “I’m really sorry, but do you mind just waiting over there for a little bit?” She points to a few chairs in the corner behind them. “Karlie and I need to have a chat with my publicist.”

“Yeah, sure,” Alexa says with a smile.

Taylor smiles back at her before she turns away and walks over towards Tree. As she follows Taylor, Karlie looks across the room at Alexa and sees that the girl is flipping out her phone. She feels her heart jolt nervously as she wonders if Alexa is texting her friends or posting about them online this very second. Trusting that the girl will keep her promise, Karlie shoves the thought away.

As they stop in front of a scowling Tree, Karlie suddenly feels like she’s right back in elementary school being yelled at by the teacher for having done something wrong.

“Quite the situation you've gotten yourselves into,” Tree hisses at them and Karlie swallows.

“I’m sorry,” she says quietly, “it was my fault, I…”

“What? No,” Taylor interrupts her, “it’s just as much my fault as it is yours. This wouldn’t even have happened if Austin hadn’t just barged in here. I mean, what’s the fucking point of knocking if you’re just going to barge in right after anyway?” She glares at Austin who shrugs and looks away. 

“No matter whose fault it is, this is quite the predicament,” Tree says, her voice a little softer now. “What do you want me to do about it, Taylor? Do you want me to contact her parents and have her sign an NDA?”

Taylor thinks about it for a second. “No,” she finally answers, “that’s too extreme. She seems like a nice kid. We had a short chat with her and she promised to keep her mouth shut. Maybe you can just talk to her as well, really stress that this can't get out.”

“I can do that,” Tree says with a nod, “but seriously, girls, _try_ not to let this happen again unless you’re ready for it to be all over the internet. I can handle this one girl, but you know there's only so much I can do.”

While Tree goes over to talk to Alexa and ensure that she won't breathe a word of this to anyone, Taylor finally turns to Karlie and leans in for a hug, burying her face in Karlie’s chest. 

“I am so embarrassed,” she mutters, “I can’t believe a teenager walked in on us.”

“Yeah, that’s something to _not_ tell the grandchildren.”

“God, how can you joke about this?” 

“Sorry,” Karlie says, “defense mechanism. So did Austin say who this girl is and why he brought her?”

“Yeah,” Taylor says as she breaks the hug, taking a step back. “She’s the daughter of this couple my parents know. Apparently mom called him and told him to find her because she’s a big fan and would love to meet me. And you know my mom, she likes to make people's days.”

“Yeah, that sums her up,” Karlie says with a chuckle. 

“She apparently said he should ask me though but he figured I’d say yes anyway so he just brought her in. Stupid.” She glares at Austin again, who is reading something on his phone, but this time he doesn’t notice. 

“I suppose I understand though,” Karlie says, “the whole walking straight in after you knock is a family thing. My sisters do it all the time.”

“It’s not so bad when we’re in private, although considering what you and I do in private he would probably want to be more careful, but he should know by now not to just waltz in whenever he pleases.”

“Siblings…” Karlie responds with a playful smile and Taylor nods.

“Exactly.”

“I think Tree finished talking to Alexa,” Karlie says and nods in their direction, causing Taylor to turn around.

“I see. Come,” she says and takes Karlie’s hand, leading her across the room to sit down.

“Hey,” Taylor says to Alexa, a smile on her face, and Alexa lights up.

“Hey,” she replies, echoing Taylor’s smile.

“So Alexa and I just had a chat about how important it is to keep this quiet,” Tree says “and like you said earlier, she’s on board with that. I think my work here is done, for now.”

“Thanks Tree,” Taylor says with a smile. 

“Now, I don’t want to have to do this again tonight, so behave yourselves, okay?” Tree wags a finger at them and Alexa giggles in the chair next to them. 

“Got it,” Karlie mumbles, a faint blush becoming visible on her cheeks. 

“Good,” Tree says, “and remember, it’s showtime in 40 minutes so you don’t have all day.” With a smile on her face, she turns around and leaves, leaving the three girls alone to chat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to a three-day long convention this weekend so I'm posting this chapter early. It does mean it might take a little longer to post the next chapter since I won't be able to start writing it until Tuesday. But enjoy this and there will be more coming asap!
> 
> Also, I love comments. ;)


	15. Chapter 15

Later that night, Karlie is sitting in the audience, an empty chair to her left separating her and Selena, who’s turned around in her seat talking to Lily. There’s a buzz in the air of music playing softly over the speakers, mixed with the noise of people talking and laughing and taking selfies as everyone is mingling during the umpteenth commercial break, but Karlie isn’t joining in, she’s just staring down at the chair. She plays with the rings on her hands as she takes a deep breath, working through her nerves. A hand is placed on her left shoulder and she turns, finding Austin’s smiling face looking at her.

“Relax, she’s done this a million times before.”

Karlie smiles back at him before she takes a deep breath. “Yeah, I know,” she says, “I don’t even know why I’m so nervous. She’ll kill it, as usual.”

All of a sudden, everyone is returning to their seats as a voice announces that the show will recommence in one minute. The lights dim, marking the end of the break, and the noise of the audience dies down. 

“Breathe, girl,” Austin whispers to her and gives her a reassuring pat on the back as he sits back in his chair, ready to watch the next performance.

“The next performer is a superwoman. Her latest album has sold nearly 9 million copies worldwide, and she was nominated seven times tonight. Performing her newest single Out of the Woods, here’s Taylor Swift!” 

Karlie stares at the stage as the music starts playing and the lights focus on Taylor. She had refused to tell Karlie what she was wearing, waving off all questions about it, insisting that she wanted to keep it a surprise, but Karlie recognizes the shadowy creation the second the stage lights shine down on it.

As Taylor has the audience enthralled, Karlie stands up and watches her intently, with a big smile on her face. She takes in every single little detail of Taylor’s performance, trying to etch it into her memory forever: How she winks at the audience, how she licks her lips for a split second before holding the microphone up to her mouth again, singing the next line. She oozes confidence as she walks around on stage, strutting the way Karlie taught her, not a hint of the anxiety Karlie knows must be coursing through her veins showing on her face, and Karlie sways where she stands, pride radiating from her. 

When Taylor finishes her performance, she blows the audience a kiss in Karlie’s general direction. Karlie can feel her cheeks redden just a little and hopes no one around them is paying her enough attention to notice. Knowing she can just blame it on the heat in the arena if she has to, she shrugs the worry away and turns around toward Austin.

“See, told you there was nothing to worry about,” he says and winks at her. 

Karlie grins at him before she turns back around, thinking that Taylor absolutely killed it on stage.

***

When Taylor finally returns to her seat during the second break after her performance, Karlie grins at her. Taylor’s cheeks flush a little as she meets Karlie’s adoring gaze, and she looks away for a second, a small smile on her face. 

Austin, Lily and Selena hug Taylor in turn, telling her how amazing the performance was. When it’s finally Karlie’s turn, she can feel her heartbeat thumping louder than usual. After their little incident earlier in the dressing room, all Karlie can think about is how she must keep her hands to herself, but Taylor leans in for the hug with a smile on her face. 

“Relax,” she whispers softly into Karlie’s ear before letting Karlie go, and Karlie takes a deep breath to calm her nerves.

As soon as they sit back down in their seats, Karlie leans over to Taylor. “So, the lost dark tour outfit, hey?” 

“Yeah…” Taylor laughs. “The fans have been asking about it, wondering where it went after that one show. Little did they know I was saving it for a special occasion...”

“It really looks fantastic. Suits the song really well.”

“Yeah, I thought so too,” Taylor replies excitedly. 

Karlie grins as her gaze falls on Taylor’s lips. 

“Kar…” Taylor says with a warning, but the smile on her face doesn’t drop. 

“I know,” Karlie says, forcing herself to look into Taylor’s eyes instead. “You looked amazing out there. And you killed it, as usual.”

“Thank you for saying that,” Taylor replies and Karlie chuckles.

“You know that is your go-to answer, right?” 

“Yes, I’ve been told this many, many times,” Taylor replies and winks at Karlie. “Now hush, it’s starting again.” She leans her head down lightly onto Karlie’s shoulder, just for a second, before sitting up straight again and smiling happily at her. 

***

Several awards and multiple performances later, the awards ceremony is almost over. The only award left up for grabs is the one Karlie knows Taylor wants most of all – Album of the Year.

She watches Taylor shift nervously in her seat as the presenters arrive on stage to introduce the nominees. As the names of the nominees are read and their video segments shown on the screen, Karlie suddenly feels Taylor’s hand grasp her own, squeezing it tightly. She looks over at Taylor worriedly, before noticing that Taylor’s other hand is holding Selena’s, and she chuckles softly to herself. _Nothing to be nervous about here, everyone will just assume Taylor is seeking support from her best friends._ She squeezes back, taking advantage of for once being able to get away with being affectionate towards Taylor in public. 

“And the Grammy Award for album of the year goes to… 1989, Taylor Swift!!!”

“OH MY GOD, WHAT?” Taylor yells in exhilaration and attacks Karlie with a big, long hug before hugging Austin, Lily and Selena. 

She quickly gets ushered away from her seat and up to the stage. Karlie watches her girlfriend proudly as the audience stands up for her, a seemingly everlasting wave of applause and cheers rushing over her. Taylor’s face is lit up in one giant smile. Happiness soars inside of Karlie and she wishes Taylor would be able to smile like that at all times.

The clapping and cheering dies down as Taylor is standing in front of the microphone now, holding her third Grammy of the night in her hands. 

“Wow,” she starts out saying, looking out into the audience, and quickly glancing down to her Grammy as if making sure it's really there. “It is such an honor to win this award for this album. Thank you all so much for listening to it, buying it, and liking it. Thank you for letting these songs into your lives, for making these stories your own. There are so many people I want to thank: all of the amazing people who worked with me on this album, who helped me bring my vision for 1989 to life. I'm so proud of what we did, I'm so proud of the magic we created together. My parents, my brother Austin,” she nods in his direction, “my friends, especially Karlie,” a small smile spreading across her face as she says Karlie’s name, “Lily and Selena who are here with me tonight, my publicist Tree… Oh, and of course my fans – without you I wouldn’t be here accepting this award tonight. I love you all so much!”

The audience cheers as Taylor hugs the two presenters again and makes her way off the stage. 

Karlie waits excitedly for Taylor to reappear in the audience. When she finally sees her, Taylor’s face full of glee, her newest Grammy in her hands, Karlie’s bursting with pride and love for her. It takes every bit of willpower Karlie possesses to not run across the room and claim her lips with a lingering kiss. Instead she just beams at Taylor and squeals excitedly when Taylor finally reaches them, holding out the Grammy for them to see. 

“This is awesome,” Lily says behind them.

“You definitely deserved that,” Selena chimes in and throws her arms around Taylor again, squeezing her in another hug.

“Give it to me!” Austin demands jokingly, and Taylor hands it over to him. “Hmm,” he says, scrutinizing it. “I think this one needs to sit right next to the one you got for Fearless.”

Taylor laughs at him. “Yeah, I suppose it does need to sit right next to that one.” She glances over at Karlie and smiles at her just as ushers start urging the audience to leave their seats and file out of the arena, now that the ceremony is truly over.

Taylor leads them, Austin and the three girls following right behind her. Once outside in the hallway, Karlie catches up to Taylor and falls into step beside her. She throws an arm around Taylor’s back and squeezes her in a sideways hug while they’re walking. As they turn a corner, Karlie can feel Taylor’s fingers lightly tapping the back of her hand. Karlie starts pulling her arm away, thinking Taylor was trying to subtly tell her that she should keep her hand to herself, but Taylor turns her head.

“No, don’t,” she whispers, and Karlie happily lets her hand fall back to its rightful place on Taylor’s waist. 

***

The second they walk through the door of Taylor’s dressing room, Karlie can’t control herself any longer. She shoots a quick glance towards the entrance to make sure everyone got in and the door is safely shut before she turns Taylor towards her so they’re facing each other. She leans in and places her lips on Taylor’s, kissing her deeply. “I’m so proud of you,” she whispers in between kisses.

“Um, guys…?” Selena says, interrupting their kissing. “Would you like to be alone?”

Taylor turns away from Karlie as she laughs, intertwining her fingers with Karlie’s as she does. “No,” she giggles, “sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry,” Selena replies, “we just feel a little left out.”

“Why?” Karlie says, a sly smile spreading across her face now. “Do you want in on the action?”

“Karlie!” Taylor exclaims and punches her arm lightly.

“I’m just kidding,” Karlie laughs, “You know I would never share.”

“Oh God, why are you like this?” Taylor whines, a faint blush spreading across her cheeks. 

“I’m sorry, I’m just teasing,” Karlie replies. “I’ll be good, I promise.” 

***

The next morning, Karlie is woken up by one of the cats walking on her, meowing for food. Taylor is still asleep beside her, her legs still tangled in between Karlie’s. Karlie carefully untangles herself from Taylor and gets out of bed. She pulls a t-shirt over her head as she walks towards the kitchen, both of the cats following her. 

Last night had been fun. Immediately after the event, there had been plenty of photos taken of Taylor and her three awards. Karlie had stood just out of view of the cameras, staring proudly at Taylor. Afterwards the five of them had gone to an after-party and partied the night away. Taylor and Karlie had come home late, drunk and exhausted, and had stumbled into bed while kissing sloppily, their designer outfits left to crumple on the bedroom floor.

Karlie almost trips over Meredith right outside the kitchen and bangs her elbow on the doorway. “Owwww,” she exclaims as Meredith meows grumpily at her, and Karlie glares at her. “You’re lucky you’re cute,” she mutters under her breath as she finds the kibble in the cupboard and pours it into the cats’ bowls. 

She makes her way back to the bedroom, leaving the cats to eat their breakfast in silence. Her head is spinning a little, the alcohol from last night still swirling around in her system, so she takes a detour to the bathroom first to down a glass of water, hoping to avoid a hangover later.

Walking back into the bedroom, her eyes land on her lovely gown lying on the floor. She picks it up and hangs it over a chair. “That’s better,” she says quietly to herself. She turns and walks around the room picking up the pieces of Taylor’s Balmain suit, hanging them over the chair as well.

Taylor turns in bed as Karlie slips back under the covers. 

“What time is it?” Taylor mumbles, eyes still closed. She sleepily places her hand on Karlie’s chest and nuzzles closer to her. 

“Just past seven,” Karlie answers, “go back to sleep.” 

But she doesn’t have to say it, Taylor is already sound asleep. Karlie smiles as she strokes Taylor’s hair and kisses her forehead before she, too, shuts her eyes and falls back into a peaceful slumber.


	16. Chapter 16

The next time Karlie wakes up, it’s due to Taylor fidgeting next to her. 

“Where’s my phone?” Taylor mutters as she uses her hands to feel around for it under the covers.

Karlie sits up and looks around the room, spotting it on top of the dresser by the door. She crawls out of bed and sways on the spot for a second before she catches her balance and walks over to get the phone for Taylor.

“Here,” she says as she crawls back under the warm covers, handing Taylor the phone.

Taylor gives Karlie a peck on the lips as she takes the phone from her. “Thanks.”

Karlie watches Taylor as she flips through her phone, checking messages and e-mails. She plays with her messy hair as her eyes are glued to the phone screen, and Karlie suddenly realizes what it is Taylor is looking for.

“Tay…” she says, putting a hand on Taylor’s shoulder to grab her attention. As soon as she can see directly into those bright blue eyes, she smiles a little. “You’re looking for any new articles about us, aren’t you?”

Taylor looks away but puts her phone down on the covers. “Yeah…” she admits after some hesitation. “I know that girl promised not to tell anyone, but people break promises all the time.” She looks back at Karlie and Karlie recognizes the vulnerability that Taylor does her best to hide away from people.

“Aw, come here, you,” Karlie says and wraps her arms around Taylor. She leans back in bed bringing Taylor down with her, and they cuddle for a little while. “The fact that we haven’t heard from Tree this morning is a good indication that Alexa kept her promise,” Karlie says and kisses Taylor’s head. 

“So far,” Taylor just mutters in reply.

Karlie just holds Taylor tight, stroking her back and occasionally giving her more kisses on her forehead. 

“Thanks for coming with me last night,” Taylor says after a while. 

“Are you kidding? I wouldn’t have missed it for the world.”

“I have a headache,” Taylor says so randomly that Karlie starts laughing.

“Yeah, that’s what happens when we get drunk. We get headaches.”

“Stop laughing,” Taylor whines, “you’re making the bed shake.”

Karlie giggles as she tries to stay completely still. “You’re such a grump this morning,” she teases, “do you want me to make you an omelet for breakfast? See if we can clear that headache up?”

“Yes, please,” Taylor replies while she rubs her eyes.

Karlie gets out of bed again and holds a hand out for Taylor to grab. “Come on then, let’s get some food into you.”

Taylor comes stumbling out of bed and Karlie puts her arm around her girlfriend’s waist, leading her into the kitchen to start breakfast.

***

Karlie makes her way through customs at LAX. It’s been three whole weeks since she’s seen Taylor and her stomach is full of butterflies because of it. She can hardly wait to be back in Taylor’s arms. 

As she walks out through the doors separating the customs area from the arrivals hall, she immediately spots Kevin waiting for her. She smiles and waves at him and he nods back, waiting patiently for her to catch up to him. 

“Hey Kevin,” she says as she reaches him and he nods again.

“Miss Kloss,” he says. “Let me grab that for you.” He grabs her suitcase in one hand and uses the other to signal which way they’re going. “After you.”

As Kevin drives Karlie to Taylor’s house, Karlie sits back and looks at the view. After having attended fashion weeks in New York, Paris and Milan, and that charity event in London, all in three weeks’ time, she longs for coming home to Taylor, even if it is in LA. Home is where Taylor is, after all. 

***

Taylor comes running out into the driveway as the car comes to a halt. She jumps on the spot while waiting for Karlie to get out of the car, and as soon as Karlie has a hand outside of the car door, Taylor grabs it and pulls her into a long embrace. “Welcome home,” she squeals excitedly, “I’ve missed you so much!”

Karlie responds by holding Taylor even tighter, breathing in Taylor’s familiar scent. “I’ve missed you too,” she murmurs happily into Taylor’s ear and Taylor giggles. 

She takes Karlie’s hand and leads her into the hallway, kissing her softly one, two, three times. “I want you so badly right now,” she whispers and Karlie feels her face redden as she blushes from Taylor’s remark.

“Later,” she whispers back before their lips meet again.

Taylor breaks their kiss and takes a step back, taking in the sight of the girl standing in front of her. “God, you’re beautiful,” she says softly, “and we kind of have to go.”

“Already?” Karlie asks and flips out her phone to check the time. “I thought we had at least an hour before we had to go. I wanted to have lunch, I’m starving.” 

“I’ll make you something while you shower,” Taylor says with a smile, “but you have to shower quickly because we’re actually on a tight schedule already. You see, Lauren called earlier while you were still in the air. Hannah took a turn for the worse so she’s actually in the hospital.”

“Oh no,” Karlie says, “Is she okay?”

“I think so. Lauren explained that she got a chest infection that required hospitalization. She really wanted us to come anyway though and her doctors said it was okay, but only if we came during visiting hours and they start in a little more than an hour. She’s at the Cystic Fibrosis Center at the Children’s Hospital so we should be able to get there on time.”

“Yeah, alright, that makes sense then,” Karlie replies, “I guess I should jump in the shower.” She leans in for another kiss before hurrying down the hallway and into the bathroom, leaving Taylor to make them some lunch to eat on the way over.

***

Lauren meets them in the hospital foyer amongst staring children and their parents. 

“Taylor Swift is here,” Karlie hears one of the children say to her parents, and soon the same sentence echoes through the entire room.

Taylor looks around the room and smiles at everyone. “Since we’re already here, do you think we can arrange for a little meet and greet session for the kids after?” she asks Lauren quietly, gesturing to all the people now surrounding them.

“I’ll see what I can do,” Lauren replies with a smile and starts leading the way through the crowd and into an elevator. “Hannah is currently very susceptible to infections so you’re going to have to put on a face mask and a gown before you can go inside. The nurses know that you’re coming so they’ll get everything arranged for you while I go talk to someone about the other children, okay?”

“Sounds good,” Taylor says with a smile as the elevator stops. 

They walk through long corridors with off-white walls, children’s artwork in all the colors of the rainbow covering them in order to make them seem less sterile, less like the hospital that it is. The overpowering hospital smell makes Karlie shiver and she lets out a small sigh.

Taylor immediately notices and takes her hand. “Are you okay?” she asks quietly, knowing exactly where Karlie’s thoughts have taken her. 

Karlie squeezes Taylor’s hand, grateful that Taylor offered it up so freely. “I’ll be fine,” she replies and musters up a smile. It's hard not to think about the people she's lost in settings like these but she tries to shake the thoughts away, putting on a brave face for the rest of the visit.

They reach a closed door at the end of the hall. Lauren knocks on the door and few moments later a nurse opens it with a smile. “You’re here already!” she says excitedly, looking at Taylor and Karlie. “Hannah has been going on about this all day long. Please, come inside. We’ll get you ready in here.”

As Karlie starts entering the room, Lauren stops her by grabbing her arm. “This is where I leave you guys,” she says, “but I’ll come back in an hour and then maybe we can get that other session going as well.” 

“Yeah, that sounds good,” Taylor says with a smile and turns towards Karlie. “Let’s do this!”

***

Karlie steps nervously into Hannah’s room, Taylor following closely behind her, and is greeted by a pale, blonde-haired girl lying in a bed, wearing the biggest smile Karlie has ever seen. The girl lights up at the sight of them and her beautiful smile calms Karlie’s nerves. 

“Oh my God, you’re here,” the girl says, her voice hoarse.

The girls say hello in turn, Karlie first, Taylor after, and walk over to the bed, sitting down on opposite sides. They talk about Hannah and learn about her life, who her best friend is and what her favorite subject is. They learn about her puppy named Rex and how her little brother pretends he’s Spiderman all day, every day. 

“I hope you don’t mind us asking, but why was meeting us your wish?” Karlie asks, genuinely curious.

Hannah blushes slightly and looks down into her hands. “It’s sort of lame…”

Taylor reaches out and grabs Hannah’s hand. “Hey, nothing that’s important to you is ever going to be ‘lame’, okay?”

Hannah looks shyly up at her and nods, a small smile on her face. “Okay… I... guess I’ve just always wanted to meet you,” she says, looking at Taylor, “because I’ve listened to your music ever since I was little and it’s gotten me through a lot. And then you became friends with Karlie and she… you,” she looks at Karlie now, “you are just amazing and you do so much and I kind of started coding a little bit because of you.”

“Did you? That’s amazing!” Karlie exclaims happily.

“Yeah,” Hannah answers and blushes, “I kind of spend a lot of time at home when I’m sick, and other people have school and all that and if they have a cold when I’m not feeling 100% then they can’t come over or anything so I figured I could try it. I was going to show you the app I’m working on but it’s on my computer at home.”

“We’ll have to meet again some other time, then,” Karlie says and winks at her, “because I would really like to see it.”

Hannah grins but her smile gets interrupted by a big yawn. Karlie looks at her phone to check the time and realizes Hannah’s been doing most of the talking for the past twenty minutes. _No wonder the girl is getting tired._ She shoots Taylor a meaningful glance, asking her "Do you think it's time to....?" and trailing off. Taylor smiles at her and seems to catch on immediately, knowing that she means this would be a good time for the surprise they'd planned for Hannah, and gets right to it. 

“Hey,” she says, “did you go to one of the shows here in LA last year?”

“No,” Hannah says, shaking her head slightly. “I don’t really get to go to concerts a lot. Too risky, you know.”

Taylor sends her a knowing look. “I had a feeling you were going to say that so I’ll be right back.” She stands up and hurries to the door, but she doesn’t leave. She only holds her hand out through the door for a second and when she pulls her arm back in, she’s holding one of her favorite guitars.

Hannah gasps in surprise. “No way. You brought a guitar.”

“I did,” Taylor says with a laugh. “You see, Karlie and I thought we could give you a little concert to cheer you up.”

“Don’t look at me,” Karlie laughs, “this was all her.” 

“So what are you going to play?” Hannah asks, eyes wide from the realization that she’s getting a private concert from her favorite artist in the world.

“I’ll play anything you want me to play,” Taylor replies with a smile that can be seen through her mask, her eyes twinkling. 

“Anything?” Hannah asks slowly, and Taylor nods. “How many songs?”

Taylor glances towards the wall clock above the door and Karlie watches her silently calculate in her head before she answers. “I think we should have enough time for six.”

“Six? Oh wow,” Hannah replies, “um… and you’ll really sing whatever song I pick?”

Taylor nods again. “Absolutely.”

“Then… I think I want one that you’ve only played a few times. Wonderland.”

Taylor looks over at Karlie, clearly seeking approval, and Karlie nods.

“Okay, Wonderland it is,” Taylor says. "Don't hate me if I'm a little rusty," she jokes, "like you said, I haven't played this one in a while..."

At the sound of Taylor’s guitar, Karlie takes Hannah’s hand and holds it tight as she sinks back in her chair. The sound of Taylor’s voice always relaxes her, and both her and Hannah are transfixed by Taylor as she sings.

Upon finishing, Hannah breaks free of Karlie’s grasp to clap her hands. “That was amazing.”

“Thank you,” Taylor says with a smile on her face. “Do you know what song you want next?”

“Yeah,” Hannah says, “Fifteen, because I just turned fifteen last month, so I've been listening to it a lot.”

Taylor chuckles at that. "I should have guessed," she teases, and starts playing, her voice filling the room again. 

The songs follow each other in rapid succession and soon enough, Taylor has played Out of the Woods, Mine, Shake It Off and Clean for Hannah. 

After Clean, Taylor looks up at the clock again. “You know, we actually have time for one more song if you want. Or we can chat instead, that’s up to you.”

Hannah thinks about it for a few seconds. “I think one more song sounds good.”

“Which one do you want to hear?” Taylor asks her gently.

“I think I want Mean, because... Well, my friends are great, but sometimes other people at school don't understand why I'm gone so much, and they don't understand why I get different food at lunch, and they just say the stupidest things and that song always make me feel a lot better.” She smiles while she says it, trying to look like she doesn't care _that_ much about what people say about her, but her smile doesn’t quite reach her eyes. 

Taylor walks over to her and gives her a hug. “Kids in high school can be cruel, I know, and I’m so happy you found some way to not let it get to you. You’re amazing; don’t let anyone tell you differently.”

As Taylor gets ready to play the last song, Hannah looks over at Karlie. “Hey Karlie…” she says quietly, her face showing signs of exhaustion. 

“Yes, princess?” Karlie answers, leaning closer to the bed.

“This is probably weird but can you lie next to me and hold my hand again for this next song?”

“Of course I can, sweetie,” Karlie says, not finding the request odd at all. She stretches her long body out on the bed next to Hannah, and Hannah moves just a little, resting her head on Karlie’s shoulder. By the time Taylor stops singing, Hannah is sound asleep. Karlie strokes her hair and gives her a kiss on the forehead through her mask before she carefully gets up from the bed. 

Taylor scribbles a note for Hannah that she leaves on the bedside table for Hannah to read when she wakes up.

Taking Karlie’s hand, she leads them towards the door, and they exit the room as quietly as they can, leaving Hannah to get some much needed rest.

***

For a few hours after their visit with Hannah, they take over an empty room that the hospital found for them, where Taylor takes pictures with kids, signs autographs for them and makes sure everyone gets plenty of hugs. Some of the older children, the teenagers, know Karlie as well, asking for hugs and pictures, but for the most part, Karlie stands behind Taylor and watches her engage with her young fans. It makes Karlie’s heart soar to see Taylor interact with the children and she is suddenly hit with a vision of a possible future, of her and Taylor and a few children running around in their home, a vision that brings a huge smile to her face. 

Four hours later, they are finally ready to leave the hospital. They walk through the halls of the hospital, chatting happily as they make their way towards the exit. 

“I’m hungry,” Karlie says as her stomach suddenly growls loudly, and Taylor laughs.

“I can hear that! I’m hungry too, I’ll make us something good when we get home.”

As they enter the foyer, the first thing Karlie notices is the weather outside. When they arrived at the hospital it had been sunny, but now there’s a downpour happening outside and she groans. “We’re going to get wet,” she mutters to Taylor and pouts.

Taylor just laughs at her. “We have umbrellas in the car. I’m sure Kevin will bring them in with him when he comes back.”

Just as Taylor says it, Karlie can see Kevin making his way from the car and through the crowd that has gathered outside, a large umbrella in his hand.

“See?” Taylor says with a smile, “told you.”

“Miss Swift,” Kevin says as he walks through the door, “the crowd outside is full of paparazzi. I suggest we make a quick exit and drive away as soon as possible.”

“Lead the way.”

***

They get to the car and crawl in, paparazzi lenses practically stuck in their faces. Jeff preceded them to the car and is already in the driver’s seat ready to take off as soon as all doors are securely closed and locked, and soon the car is on its way in the rain. There is a comfortable silence in the car as the girls check their e-mails and social media.

“You’re amazing, do you know that?” Karlie says suddenly.

Taylor looks up from her phone and meets Karlie’s gentle eyes. “Why do you say that?” 

“Just seeing you in there with all the children… It’s amazing how gentle you are, how fair you are, making sure everyone who wants to gets to talk to you. And with Hannah too, bringing the guitar and letting her choose all of the songs. I don’t know… You’ve always been amazing to me.” 

Taylor gazes at her with loving eyes. She brings her left hand to Karlie’s face and pulls her close to her for a kiss. “Thank you,” she says softly, “so are you.”

“Thanks,” Karlie says with a small laugh, “I really mean it though, you are really amazing. Speaking of songs though, you know you don’t have to get my approval every time you want to play Wonderland, right?”

“I know that,” Taylor says with a nod, “but I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable or anything.”

“You know I would never hold your past against you, and the song is gorgeous. I just wish it was written about me.”

“Does it make you feel better that the entire next album is going to be about you?” Taylor asks with a smile and Karlie nods.

“Much.” She leans in and kisses Taylor again, but the low muttering in the front of the car is distracting her and she pulls away. 

Taylor looks at her confusedly, and Karlie points to the front of the car where the two guys are clearly discussing a problem, trying to figure out what to do. 

“Hey guys, what’s happening?” Taylor asks them, her voice loud so it carries all the way to the front. 

“There are some paparazzi that have followed us since the hospital. They’re not doing anything stupid, so far, but we’re not feeling entirely comfortable with the situation at hand.” 

Karlie glances outside the window and notices that the speed they are driving at is a bit faster than usual and she swallows hard. She's well aware of how savage the paparazzi can be, and the rain really doesn’t help at all, making the road slippery and dangerous. 

Her hand finds Taylor’s and holds it tightly as she continues to stare out the window. When she realizes she never heard Taylor reply to Kevin’s answer, she glances towards her girlfriend and finds her staring out the window too. She recognizes the worry on Taylor’s face, the look of anxiety that always shows up in situations where Taylor doesn’t feel safe. She decides to let go of Taylor’s hand and pulls her in for a hug instead.

They drive in silence again for what feels like an eternity. There is nothing Karlie wants more right now than to see the familiar gates leading into Taylor’s property and she twists the rings around her fingers anxiously.

When the car finally turns into the road leading towards Taylor’s house, Karlie lets out a small sigh. _Almost home._ It is only then that she notices a car coming up on their left side, driving recklessly on the wrong side of the street. She stares out the window, eyes wide, and notices another car coming towards them. The car next to them pushes ahead at the last moment to avoid the oncoming car, causing Taylor’s big SUV to swerve to the right and into a dead-end street. 

“Shit,” she hears Jeff say loudly as several cars follow them into the street where they have nowhere to escape to. Again, there is a car coming up on their left side but this one is too close, so close. Karlie hears Taylor scream as their car slides off the wet street and hits something, hard, plunging her into darkness.


	17. Chapter 17

There’s a buzzing sound, a distant whisper of something Karlie can’t quite grasp. 

Something is dripping onto her forehead and Karlie can’t understand why something would drip onto her forehead. Where is she anyway? 

She attempts to move her arm up to her forehead to find out what it is that is dripping, but the movement causes a sharp pain to flare out from her shoulder down her arm, while it feels like she's being stabbed in the chest with every breath, and she stops, wondering why everything hurts.

“Karlie?” she hears a voice yell in the distance. “KARLIE?” and she feels a hand grabbing onto her leg, not quite shaking it to elicit a response, but pinching it urgently, yet lightly at the same time. She tries moving her head to see who it is, but the pain forces her to stay still and she closes her eyes as she tries to get her brain to stop screaming at her.

“Karlie, can you hear me?” she hears again and she opens her eyes again, her green eyes finding a pair of blue ones to focus on. 

Taylor!

“Tay…” she whispers and smiles, or at least attempts to, she’s not quite sure of what’s happening here. Her eyes latch onto the smear of deep red that’s soiling Taylor’s otherwise blonde hair and Karlie frowns. Blood? 

“Why are you bleeding?” she asks, feeling confused and scared now.

“Karlie, do you know where you are?” Taylor asks, completely ignoring Karlie’s question. Her voice is shrill and frantic, and there’s a shiver in it that Karlie normally doesn’t hear. “Can you move?”

Karlie thinks about it for a split second. “No,” she responds, “it hurts too much.” She looks at Taylor in bewilderment. Why does it hurt? “What happened?” she asks, tears pressing on her eyes now as the situation starts to dawn on her.

“We were forced off the road,” Taylor says, “but I’m not sure how the car ended up like this, I was out for a while.” Taylor changes position and winces, and Karlie suddenly realizes she’s supporting her left arm with her right one, holding it up against her chest. 

“Your arm…” Karlie says, her voice shaky now.

“It’s okay, sunshine,” Taylor says in a hushed tone, “it will be okay. Now, Karlie, listen to me carefully. I’m not going to attempt to move you in any direction, I’ve seen too many episodes of Grey’s Anatomy for that, but tell me what you feel.”

“Pain,” Karlie just replies as she feels her head spin a little from the magnitude of it all.

“Yes, but all ten fingers and toes as well?”

Karlie nervously wiggles her toes and fingers, wincing as the movement of her hand sends another round of sharp pain through her body. “Yes,” she says finally and she hears Taylor letting out a sigh of relief.

Karlie is suddenly aware of the myriad of voices coming from outside. She can hear sirens coming closer and closer towards them. “Who is that outside?” she asks Taylor quietly, still not quite grasping the situation. 

“I think the bigger question is who isn’t outside. They all arrived after us, stopped their cars and came running from their yards.” Taylor speaks quietly, a tiredness interwoven with every word.

“What about Kevin and Jeff?” Karlie asks, suddenly remembering their entourage.

“They’re okay,” Taylor says, “some cuts and bruises, but they are currently out there doing more than I would ever expect of them.”

The sound of the sirens almost deafens them for a second before they are turned off, the ambulances stopping right outside. Taylor crawls out as carefully as she can to meet the ambulance personnel.

“Please help my friend first,” Karlie hears her say, followed by a woman’s voice. “Oh, hey, I got you… Can someone go help her friend while I carry this one over to the gurney?”

“On it,” another female voice says. Soon Karlie sees someone crawling towards her.

“Hey there,” the woman says, “can you tell me your name?”

“Karlie,” Karlie says, “what happened to Taylor, is she okay?”

“Hey Karlie, I’m Susan,” the woman says, “My coworker is taking good care of your friend, don’t you worry.”

“Okay,” Karlie whispers.

“Now, I’m going to get you out of here, okay, but I need to crawl back out and gather some things I'll need before we do that, okay? I’ll be right back.” Her voice is calm and soothing, calming Karlie down.

Susan comes back as quickly as she left, a neck brace in her hand. “Okay, Karlie, try not to move as I put this on,” and Karlie does as she’s told, closing her eyes and focusing on anything other than the pain that her brain is having a really hard time blocking out.

“I’m going to get you onto this backboard now, and it’s going to hurt, but once we’re out I’ll give you something for it so it’ll only hurt for a second. We have to in order to get you out of here, okay?”

“Okay,” Karlie whimpers, scared of the red hot pain she knows is coming. 

Gritting her teeth, she prepares herself as Susan carefully places the backboard underneath Karlie and pulls her onto it. An intense pain blazes through Karlie and blinds her in a darkened haze. 

***

She comes to in the ambulance on the way to the hospital.

“Where is Taylor?” she asks Susan, who sits by Karlie’s side in the back of the vehicle. 

“She’s a few minutes ahead of us, in the other ambulance. Don’t worry, sweetie, we’ll be there soon. How are you feeling?”

“Like an elephant stepped on me,” Karlie says slowly. 

“Yeah,” Susan says, “that’s to be expected. How is the pain?”

“Almost gone,” Karlie says, “you must have given me some good stuff. My arm feels weird though.” She looks down on it and wonders if it’s looking funny or if it’s just her imagination.

“Your shoulder has been dislocated so that’s the reason for that. We’ve stabilized it but the doctors are going to assess what damage has been done.”

“Okay,” Karlie whispers and tears suddenly start streaming down her face. She wishes Taylor was here in the car with her, that this stupid thing had never happened, and she wanted her mom.

“Hey now,” Susan says with that calm, soothing voice again, “everything will be okay,” and Karlie clings to the hope that she’s right.

As they stop in front of the hospital and open the ambulance doors, a well-groomed guy walks up to them. “Miss Swift has requested that you bring her friend to the same room she’s in.”

Susan leans close to Karlie and smiles. “See, Karlie,” she says, “you’ll see your friend again very soon.”

They move her onto a bed and wheel her away through the hallways until they finally reach a room that is secluded from the rest of the emergency department. 

“Karlie!” Taylor practically yells as soon as Karlie is inside and Karlie starts crying again, relieved to hear Taylor’s voice and annoyed she can’t sit up yet to look at her.

“Are you okay?” she asks Taylor with an unsteady voice. 

“Yeah, for the most part,” Taylor replies. “My arm is broken, and they need to patch me up in a few places after they get a CT to check that my brain didn’t leak out or something.”

“Please don’t make me laugh,” Karlie replies, feeling like the stabbing pain in her chest might actually kill her if she does.

“Oh, I’m sorry, babe,” Taylor coos. “OH, they’re taking me for that thing now, wait for me here!”

“Wait for me here,” Karlie repeats quietly to herself, “you idiot. Where do you think I'd go?”

***

An MRI scan, three X-rays, an arm sling, many painkillers and a thorough examination revealing three broken ribs later, Karlie is finally able to sit halfway up in a bed next to Taylor’s. Karlie is tired, her voice still a bit hoarse from the screaming she did as the doctors struggled with popping her shoulder back in. She lets her gaze slide down her own body before resting her eyes on Taylor, taking in the sorry sight of their injuries. In addition to Karlie’s arm sling and bruises, Taylor has a long bandage covering the stitched up laceration on her scalp, and sports a black cast on her left arm. 

“What a pair we are,” Taylor says quietly, looking over at Karlie with tired eyes.

“Good thing you’re not on tour right now,” Karlie remarks, “because you won’t be able to play with that arm for a while.”

“I know,” Taylor sighs just as her phone chimes. She grabs it with her good arm and checks the message quickly, squinting at the bright screen, before she lies back in her bed. “Tree is on her way in,” she says, “and I’m so tired. I just want to sleep.”

“You can sleep once she leaves,” Karlie says reassuringly just as Tree opens the door and walks in.

“I am so happy to see that you both are alive and awake,” she says as she rushes up to Taylor and gives her a hug. 

“No hug for me, thanks,” Karlie says softly just as Tree is about to give her one as well, “I don’t think my ribs can take it right now.”

Tree sends her a sympathetic look and squeezes Karlie’s hand instead, and Karlie smiles.

“I could strangle those fucking idiots,” Tree suddenly growls, staring at Taylor. “YOU COULD HAVE DIED!”

“Please don’t shout,” Taylor winces and closes her eyes.

“She’s got a concussion,” Karlie explains as Tree sends her a quizzical look. “They’re keeping her overnight for observation just in case. As for me, well… two doctors are discussing my arm. Apparently it was a complicated dislocation and since it feels… strange, they want to do another X-ray in the morning. Have you called our parents?”

“Yeah,” Tree says, “I sent the jet to Nashville to get Andrea…”

“Thank you,” Taylor mumbles sleepily from her bed.

“…and I called your parents and your mom is coming on the other jet tomorrow. They’re all just happy you guys are okay.”

“Thanks Tree,” Karlie says with a sleepy smile, “it’s greatly appreciated.”

“I know, you’re welcome,” Tree replies and returns the smile. 

She looks over at Taylor, whose breathing has grown steadier with the rhythm of sleep, and her smile disappears. “There are so many things I need to do tonight so she doesn’t wake up in the morning to a world that is even more horrible to her than it was today,” she says with a sigh. “I’ve already bought up the pictures from the paparazzi scum that caused this so they won't make it to the media, but I don’t know yet what to do with the nosy residents that gathered around you. I know security tried to convince them to be respectful but they were hurt too, so who knows what might already be on twitter...” 

Looking over at Karlie now, she asks “Do you think you will be okay here alone for a few hours? There is a guard outside the door, he won’t let anyone in unless they’re supposed to be here.”

“Yeah, we’ll be fine,” Karlie replies and looks lovingly over at the now sleeping Taylor. “This was not how I imagined we would spend tonight,” she adds quietly, tears pressing on her eyelids. 

“I know, sweetie,” Tree says sympathetically. “Andrea should be here in a few hours so try to get some sleep until then, okay? Rest up, I’ll come see you guys in the morning.”

Karlie nods. “Okay, thank you again,” she says. 

Tree nods her head in acknowledgement, and with a final look at Taylor, she leaves and the room is finally quiet. 

***

The first time Karlie wakes up that night, it’s due to a nurse coming in to check on Taylor. The adrenaline pumps through her body, making her heartbeat run rampant as she flings her eyes open to figure out what’s happening. Her body jerks at the same time and she groans loudly as the movement sends pain shooting out from her broken ribs. With her left arm she repositions herself in bed and falls back asleep. 

The second time Karlie wakes up, the same nurse is back, checking on Taylor again. She can hear the nurse talk to Taylor, gently telling her to open her eyes. Karlie is so tired and her eyelids are too heavy for her to keep them open and she falls back into a deeper slumber. 

The third time she wakes up, someone is stroking her hair gently. She’s not awake enough to register who it is or what time it is; she just lets out a soft hum of pleasure, feeling safe.

The fourth time she wakes up, there’s a soft glow of light in the room. She glances towards the clock on the wall. 3:42am. Quiet sniffles penetrate her tired mind and she moves her head slowly in the direction of Taylor’s bed. In the dim light she spots Andrea, lying in bed with her daughter, holding Taylor tightly as she sobs quietly into her mother’s chest. A wave of emotions hits Karlie straight in the chest and tears start rolling down her face as she wishes her mother was there holding her tightly too. A small sob escapes her and Andrea looks her way, clearly trying to figure out if Karlie is awake. Karlie doesn’t want to intrude, relief that Taylor has her mother present mixing with her longing for her own, and she pretends to be asleep, knowing that Taylor needs her mom more than she does.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If anyone would like to give me some feedback on tumblr, feel free to add/message @lovesbitch :)


	18. Chapter 18

When Karlie’s mom arrives, Karlie, Tree and Andrea are having a quiet conversation while Taylor sleeps. Her concussion and subsequent headache made her drowsy and cranky, and all of them encouraged her to lie back down and close her eyes. Tree was able to limit photo leakage of their accident, but it still made headlines and now, naturally, the story is all over the internet. Karlie frankly is happy that Taylor is shielded from it as much as possible.

Tree is interrupted mid-sentence when the door opens and Tracy walks in. Karlie’s tired eyes immediately well up with tears as she exclaims “Mom!”

Tracy lets out a small gasp as her eyes wander across every little scratch on Karlie’s body. She hurries over to her daughter and hugs her carefully on Karlie’s good side as Karlie cries quietly into her mother’s chest. Tracy strokes Karlie’s hair and whispers soothing words into her ear.

Feeling safe in her mother’s embrace, it’s like a switch goes off inside of Karlie. The tears keep flowing from her eyes for what feels like an eternity and her sobs trigger a dull ache in her ribs as her body shakes every time she takes a hasty breath. 

When the tears finally come to a halt, Karlie wipes her eyes with the back of her good hand. Tracy lets go of her and turns towards the chair standing next to her, pulling it up a little closer to Karlie’s bed. 

Karlie looks sheepishly at Tree and Andrea, who occupied themselves with quiet chatter while Karlie had her moment with her mother. “Sorry,” she croaks, but they just smile at her.

“Don’t apologize, sweetie,” Andrea says as she gazes over towards her own daughter. “I understand.”

Tracy slowly strokes Karlie’s hand. “Tell me about your injuries,” she asks softly.

“Dislocated shoulder, three broken ribs right here,” Karlie says and lets go of her mother’s hand to point to the right side of her rib cage. “Going to be stuck in this sling for weeks,” she continues with a sigh.

“Anything else?”

“My arm feels funny,” she says, “there’s a weird tingling feeling in it, like it’s asleep all the time. They took me for another MRI this morning so I assume the doctor should be by shortly. They’re probably discharging me today.”

“Already?” Tracy asks, sounding surprised.

“Yeah… I can heal at home.”

“I guess…” Tracy says with a shrug before turning towards Andrea. “How is Taylor doing?”

Karlie can't help but smile when she hears the obvious concern in her mother’s voice. Knowing that her mom genuinely cares about her girlfriend too makes her heart flutter.

“She’s alive,” Andrea says and sighs. “The fracture in her arm is pretty straightforward and should heal in time. It’s the concussion we’re worried about, it’s pretty severe. Because she passed out twice on the way here, they want to do another CT-scan before I get to take her home.”

Karlie looks over at her girlfriend and swallows hard. She’ll never get used to seeing Taylor so beaten up and she feels tears pressing behind her eyelids yet again. She blinks them away stubbornly. _Not now_ , she thinks to herself, _keep it together_.

“What are we going to do about living arrangements?” Karlie hears her mother say. “Neither of them is in a position to take care of themselves right now.”

“I think…” Tree starts out saying, but Karlie interrupts her. 

“I want to go home to New York.”

The three women turn to stare at her.

“We were planning on going back there tonight,” she explains, “and considering what just happened here, I don’t particularly want to stay. I think Taylor would agree.”

“That might be so,” Andrea gently replies, “but I think it’s safe to say that neither of you are fit for travel right now, Taylor even less so than you are. Staying here for now seems like the best option.”

“I agree,” Tracy chimes in. “I’ll stay here with you.”

“No, mom, you don’t have to!” Karlie whines.

“Well, do you expect Taylor to be able to take care of you?”

Karlie looks away, knowing her mother has a point. “But what about work?” she tries.

“Work can manage without me for a few weeks, Karlie. You’re more important.”

Karlie smiles, feeling relieved that her mother is willing to stay.

“Won’t you get really bored?” she hears herself say. _Please say no_.

“I’ll be there as well,” Andrea says, “so if she gets bored, I’ll keep her company.”

“See, Karlie?” Tracy says with a smile. 

“Yeah, okay,” Karlie replies. “Thank you both.”

There’s a knock on the door and the four of them turn towards the door as it opens. 

“Ah, I see your mother has arrived, Karlie,” the doctor says as he walks towards them. As he reaches Tracy, he shakes her hand. “Dr. Edward Compton,” he says, “I’m your daughter’s doctor, nice to meet you.”

“Nice to meet you too,” Tracy replies, “I’m Tracy.”

Dr. Compton turns towards Karlie. “We need to have a little chat about that shoulder of yours.”

“Okay…” Karlie says, her voice shaking as she feels herself getting nervous. _What if it’s bad news?_ She tries to control herself as she glances up at him. She suddenly realizes he reminds her of an older version of Josh, and a small smile spreads across her face. 

The doctor pulls up a chair and sits down. He gazes quizzically at Tree and Andrea, and Karlie understands what he’s wondering about.

“It’s okay,” she says, “they can stay.”

“Okay,” he says with a smile, “let’s get right to it then. So as you know, we checked your shoulder to see if we could find a reason for the tingling and the numbness. It actually looks relatively okay in there, but there is a lot of swelling in the area and that might be putting pressure on a nerve. What we want to do is to have you rest up for about a week and then we’ll reassess once the swelling has gone down. Should be in about a week or so. You live in New York, correct?”

“Yeah,” Karlie says with a nod.

“Are you planning on going back there right away or are you staying here for a little while?”

“We’re staying until Taylor is well enough to fly.”

“Okay, that’s good,” he says and smiles. “Sounds like a good idea. What we’ll do then is that I’ll have one of the nurses schedule you for an appointment with another doctor in five to six days, okay, and they will check up on your shoulder and see if the numbness has gone away.”

“What if it hasn’t gone away by then?” Karlie asks nervously. 

“If it hasn’t, it’s likely you have some minor nerve damage. That can happen with dislocations like these. If that is what it is, it should repair itself within six months but let’s not worry about that right now, alright?”

“Okay,” Karlie mutters, not feeling happy about this at all.

“Let’s talk a little bit about your sling,” Dr. Compton continues. “It’s really important that you keep it on at all times for the next three weeks. Don’t take it off for other reasons than getting dressed or taking a shower, and don’t take it off even if your shoulder stops hurting. It needs to be stabilized so it won’t dislocate again as that can cause more damage. Now, is anyone staying with you for the next few weeks?”

“I am,” Tracy says, “at least until she’s well enough to be able to take care of herself.”

“Good, good,” Dr. Compton says and looks back at Karlie, “I strongly recommend that you have your mom help you in and out of the sling. You might require her help with other things as well, like taking a shower and washing your hair. As for your ribs, you can rest for a few days because I know you’re in a lot of pain, but in two days’ time I want you up and walking around as much as possible, okay?”

“Okay,” Karlie says, trying to muster up a smile. 

“Good! We’re just about ready to send you off home then. I’ll send a nurse in to show you both how to get you in and out of the sling, and to talk to you about your pain medication and such. You take care of yourself now, okay?” He carefully puts his hand on Karlie’s knee before he shakes hands with Tracy, Andrea and Tree in turn and leaves the room.

“This fucking sucks,” Karlie mutters once the door is closed again.

“I know, sweetie,” Tracy says, “but think about this way: you’re both alive and you’re both going to be okay again, and that is honestly all that should matter right now.”

***

An hour later, Karlie is lying back on her bed fully dressed, taking a breather before she and her mom are leaving to go back to Taylor’s house. Tree has brought them a selection of clothes from the house and Karlie has put on a pair of loose jeans and a button-up shirt that was easy for her arm to get into without moving her shoulder too much. 

“The car is on its way now,” Tree says as she checks her phone. “I told the guys to bring some of the big pillows from one of the spare bedrooms. Hopefully that should make the journey a little more comfortable for you.”

“Thank you,” she says quietly, feeling more exhausted than she ever imagined she would feel after such a seemingly simple task as getting dressed. 

A nurse knocks on the door and comes in with a wheelchair. “Are you ready to go?” she asks cheerfully and Karlie wonders if she’s always this chipper or if it’s just because she’s in a room with friends and family of Taylor Swift. 

“Almost,” Karlie says and looks over to her mom. “Help me up,” she says and Tracy holds out her arm so Karlie can link her own inside it and pull herself up from the bed. 

The nurse wheels the chair over but Karlie shakes her head slightly and the woman stops. “I need to say goodbye to Taylor first,” Karlie explains.

With short and slow steps, she makes her way from her own bed to Taylor's and sits down on it. She winces as she leans herself back on one of Taylor’s unused pillows, putting her weight on her good shoulder. She strokes Taylor’s hair and whispers sweet words to her before she tries to wake the girl up more actively. “Babe… Wake up, Tay.”

“What?” Taylor mumbles grumpily, still half asleep.

“They’ve discharged me so mom and I are going. Come on, princess, open your eyes.”

Taylor slowly opens her eyes and squints at her. “It’s too bright in here,” she whines, using her good arm to rub her eyes. “Where are you going?”

“Back to your house.”

“No, Karlie, please don’t leave me.” Taylor squints at her with glossy eyes.

“Hey, hey, hey,” Karlie says soothingly, stroking Taylor’s hair carefully, “it’s only for a few hours. We’ll see each other again soon.”

“But I don’t want to be here alone,” Taylor replies, tears brimming in her eyes now.

“But baby, your mom will be here with you, it’s okay. You won’t be alone.”

“Oh,” Taylor says. She uses her right arm to push herself up in bed so she’s more level with Karlie.

“Careful,” Karlie whispers, mostly out of pure reflex as the movement of the bed sends a dull ache coursing through her ribs again.

Taylor carefully lies her head on Karlie’s good shoulder. “I think I dreamt I lost you,” she mutters, her words barely audible.

“Shhh,” Karlie says as she softly strokes Taylor’s back. “I’m here. I’ll always be here.”

Taylor makes no sign of moving her head away from Karlie’s shoulder, and Karlie's gaze nervously moves from Taylor to Tree to the nurse standing by the wheelchair and back to Tree again. Her eyes meet Tree’s and linger there, some kind of mutual understanding passing between them, and Tree nods. 

Permission granted, she puts her hand on Taylor’s face, tilting it upwards just a little bit before she gingerly leans in and places her lips on Taylor’s, giving her a long, soft kiss. She knows that on any other day this would be a terrible idea, with strangers in the room, but today is not any other day. They could have died last night, and Karlie feels like they both deserve every bit of comfort they can get. She just has to trust that Tree will deal with the situation later.

“I really need to go now, baby,” Karlie whispers and Taylor nods. “I’ll see you in a little while, okay?”

“Okay,” Taylor replies and leans in for another kiss. “I love you.”

“I know,” Karlie says with a smile. “I love you too.”


	19. Chapter 19

In the car on the way back to Taylor’s house, Karlie is nervous. The driver, Jamie, the youngest member of Taylor’s security team, drives carefully, never hitting the brakes too abruptly, avoiding most of the bumps in the road so that Karlie will feel as little pain as possible on the way back home. Still, Karlie can’t shake the memories of yesterday’s drive and holds on to her mother’s hand so tightly her knuckles turn white. It isn’t until the car pulls into the driveway of the house that Karlie feels safe enough to let go of her mother’s hand.

As she slowly makes her way through the door, straining to keep the pain at bay, the two cats come running towards her. While Meredith stops at the bottom of the stairs, Olivia walks up to her and snakes herself around Karlie’s legs, meowing at her. 

“Hey baby,” Karlie coos at the cat and wishes she could bend down to pick her up for a cuddle.

Olivia follows her into the living room, meowing at her constantly. “What is up with you?” Karlie asks the cat as she goes through a mental checklist of what could possibly be bothering the cat. “Oh,” she whispers suddenly, “nobody fed you today.”

“Hey mom,” she asks as she carefully lowers herself onto the couch, Tracy propping pillows up behind her to protect her shoulder.

“Yeah, sweetie?”

“Could you go into the kitchen and feed the cats? They must be starving.” She grits her teeth together as she tries to make herself more comfortable, the now-familiar stabbing pain shooting through her body again. 

“Of course, but you’re going to have to tell me where the kitchen is first.”

Karlie laughs softly. “Sorry, I forgot you haven’t been here before. If you go straight past the stairs, you’ll see it on the left. The cat food should be in the cupboard to your right once you get in. Oh, and mom, can you get me my iPad first? It’s in my bag right there.” She points to her bag lying at the bottom of the stairs. It was where she had put it the day before, meaning to put it away once they got back from visiting Hannah. 

Tracy nods and quickly gets it for her.

“Thanks,” Karlie says with a smile.

“You’re welcome, honey,” Tracy replies and kisses her daughter’s forehead before moving on to the kitchen, the cats trotting happily along behind her. 

Tracy comes back out after a couple of minutes. “There was still kibble in their bowls so they weren’t exactly food-deprived,” she says, “but considering how they chomped the wet food down in seconds, you’d think they hadn’t seen food in days.”

Karlie chuckles lightly. “Yeah,” she replies, “they’re funny like that.”

“I was thinking of making us something to eat, it’s been hours since I ate. Is there anything in particular you would like me to make?”

“I don’t even know what we have in the fridge to make food from to begin with. I wasn’t in the kitchen at all yesterday,” Karlie says with a frown. “But I guess soup of some kind would be good right now.”

“I’m sure I’ll find something in there to make soup from. Any particular kind you want?”

Karlie smiles and shakes her head. “No, surprise me.”

***

She shifts positions slightly on the couch, trying to find a way to lessen the pain that’s pulsating through her body. _I wonder when Taylor will be home_ , she thinks to herself and sighs. Turning back to her iPad, she checks the time. Nearly 2pm. 

She starts going through her various social media accounts one by one, and finds them flooded with well-wishes and links to all the various articles about the crash. Clicking one with the heading “BFFs Taylor Swift and Karlie Kloss in horrible accident – forced off the road by reckless paparazzi,” she lightly drums her fingers on the side of the iPad while it loads. She starts skimming through the article, not really sure why she finds herself drawn to it, but stops once she reaches the first picture of the scene. It’s really just a picture of their crashed SUV, but she feels her heart starting to race and her hands feel clammy. Closing the tab, she goes back to her twitter feed, forcing herself to take deep breaths. “You’re okay,” she whispers to herself, “it’s okay.”

She continues scrolling down her twitter feed, trying to pass the time. She scrolls way back, catching up on weeks of replies and tags, suddenly coming across several tweets tagging both herself and Kimby. _Oh no_ , she thinks, _what has Kimby done this time?_

Finding Kimby’s profile, she explores it and her eyes grow wider as it dawns on her what Kimby’s been doing the past few weeks. “Jesus Christ, Kimby,” she mutters and swaps her iPad for her phone. Looking at the time again, she hesitates for a second. 2:30pm LA time would be 11:30 at night in Paris. “Fuck it,” she says to herself and dials her sister’s number.

Kimby picks up on the fourth ring. “Hey sis,” she says happily.

“I didn’t wake you, did I?” Karlie asks, skipping the hello all together. 

“Oh no, not at all,” Kimby replies. “How are you doing? And what about Taylor? God, mom texted me last night while I was asleep so I literally woke up to a text saying “Karlie and Taylor were in an accident. Will call in the morning.” Do you know what a horrible feeling it is to wake up to that? I freaked out and I couldn’t call mom because this time she was asleep and… it was awful.”

“We’re fine,” Karlie says softly, “well… sort of anyway. Taylor is still in the hospital, I’m just waiting for her to come home now.”

“Did any of you get seriously injured?”

“Broken bones and concussions and all that jazz,” Karlie says, going into the details of their injuries for the third time since the accident. “I can barely move and Taylor’s no better than I am so mom is staying for a few weeks until we’re able to take care of ourselves again. Andrea’s staying as well so mom won’t be stuck with all of the work.”

“So are you staying in LA for a while then?”

“How did you know we’re in LA? Did mom tell you?”

Kimby laughs. “You do realize I’ve probably read every single news article I could find, right? They all state that it was in LA.”

“Oh.”

“Haven’t you seen them?” Kimby asks.

“I opened one that someone linked me to on Twitter, but… I was there, I don’t need to read about it.” Karlie tries to brush it off like reading about it hadn’t affected her and decides to change the subject to the true reason she called her.

“Speaking of Twitter though, what the actual fuck do you think you’re doing?” Her voice is light, cheery even, but she knows that Kimby understands exactly what she’s talking about.

“Eh…” Kimby just says, her voice fading into an awkward silence.

“You know the fangirls are calling you Kaptain Kimby, right? Because you’re apparently sailing their ship for them, which you totally are, by the way.”

There’s a nervous laughter coming from the other end of the phone. “It’s all in good fun, Kar…” Kimby says, her voice trailing off, and Karlie sighs. 

“Look, I get that, but this is serious. You can’t just shamelessly like a bunch of fangirl tweets and laugh it off like it’s all in good fun. Do you realize what you are implying whenever you do it?”

She waits for an answer that doesn’t come. All she can hear from Kimby’s side of the phone is silent breathing. “Can you at least take it down a notch until further notice?” she asks after too long of a silence. “You know what we’re working towards here so please don’t ruin it for us. We really don’t need more crap right now on top of everything else that just happened.”

“Yeah, fine,” Kimby says reluctantly, “I get that. And I’m sorry. I’ll be good, I promise.”

“Thank you,” Karlie replies and smiles to herself. “I don’t want to berate you for all this, but there’s a time for everything. Your time to shine as Kaptain will come.” 

Kimby chuckles at that. “It better,” she says playfully and Karlie laughs.

“Do you want to talk to mom or should I just let you go?” she asks Kimby.

“No, tell her to call me tomorrow. I should head off to bed now actually. Feel better, okay? And give my love to Taylor.”

“I will,” Karlie promises. “Love you.”

“I love you too.”

***

A couple of hours later, Taylor and Andrea finally walk through the door. 

“Hey,” Taylor grunts as she sits down on the other couch, making no attempts to take off her sunglasses or shoes.

“Hey,” Karlie coos softly, a big smile on her face. “I see they gave you a sling too. Now we can be twins,” she says, chuckling.

Taylor looks down on her arm, wiggling her fingers a little. “Yeah…” she says, her voice trailing off for a second. “I don’t have to wear it all the time. It’s just to let it rest for a bit in the beginning.” She looks up at Karlie. “How are you feeling?”

“Sore,” Karlie replies, “but I’ll manage. How’s the headache?”

“Overwhelming,” Taylor admits with a sigh, rubbing her hand on her forehead.

“Are you hungry?” Karlie asks quietly. “Mom’s making soup, it should be ready soon.”

“No, they fed me before they discharged me,” Taylor says. “I think I’m just going to go to bed, my brain is screaming at me and it’s really hard to focus.” She gets up and sways for a second. “Whoa, dizzy,” she mutters and steadies herself by grabbing hold of the couch. “Are you coming to join me?” she asks, and Karlie smiles.

“In a bit,” she replies, the thought of finally getting to lie down next to Taylor again making her whole body hum with anticipation. “I just need to eat first, I’m starving.”

“Okay,” Taylor says and shoots Karlie a small smile before she makes her way towards the bedroom.

 _My poor baby_ , Karlie thinks as she watches Taylor disappear into the bedroom, closing the door behind her to block out the rest of the world.

***

An hour later, Karlie slowly makes her way into the bedroom. She turns on the light and quickly dims it down to the lowest setting, knowing she needs to wake Taylor up.

“Taylor,” she says softly as she walks over to Taylor’s side of the bed, but the girl doesn’t stir. She tries to shake her shoulder, but the motion sends another wave of pain through Karlie’s body and she stops. _Is it time for new painkillers yet?_

Tracy walks quietly into the room carrying three extra pillows that she puts down on the bed.

“Can you wake her up for me?” Karlie asks her, “I can’t take the pain right now, I need to sit down.” 

“Of course,” her mother says as Karlie slides down onto the bed and steadies herself with her left arm. Her head is ringing and she’s just so tired. 

Behind her, Tracy is stirring Taylor. “Taylor, sweetie,” she says, “wake up, honey.” 

“What is it?” Taylor mumbles sleepily, but sits up rubbing her eyes. 

“Can we switch sides in the bed?” Karlie asks her without turning.

“Okay,” Taylor says, “but why?” 

“So you won’t accidentally kick me in the ribs,” Karlie responds, standing up now to look at Taylor just in time to see realization hit her.

“Oh,” Taylor says, “yeah, that makes sense.”

She rolls out of bed in the most ungraceful way possible, causing Karlie to smile at how silly she looks. Walking over towards Karlie, Taylor gives her a soft kiss before she makes her way around the bed to crawl in on the opposite side. 

Karlie waits until Taylor is lying still on her back before she carefully sits down on the bed. Tracy is ready with the pillows, propping them up behind Karlie’s back as she settles into a somewhat comfortable position in bed.

“Thanks,” Karlie says and her mother leans in to kiss her forehead.

“You’re welcome, sweetie. I’ll leave you guys alone now, but just call out if you need me.”

Karlie smiles a tired smile. “Could you come back with some painkillers for me? I think I can take some more now.”

Tracy checks her watch quickly. “Yeah, looks like it. I’ll be back in a second.”

The girls lie in silence for a while, a silence that is only interrupted for a minute when Tracy walks back in with the painkillers. 

“I’ll come back and check on you in a while,” she says quietly before exiting the room, leaving the girls alone again.

“This sucks,” Taylor mumbles suddenly and fumbles around in the darkness after Karlie’s hand. She entangles her fingers with Karlie’s once she finds it and Karlie smiles to herself.

“I know,” she replies quietly. “Three weeks apart and then this happens. If I wasn’t in so much pain, I’d be all over you right now.”

“As much as I would like that, my headache would not,” Taylor replies sadly. 

Karlie strokes Taylor’s hand, trying to comfort her as much as she can without pulling her close, even though there’s nothing she wants more in the whole world right now. In the silence she can hear silent sniffles coming from Taylor and her heart breaks into pieces when she realizes Taylor is crying again.

“Oh baby, come here,” Karlie says, knowing she might regret it later.

“Won’t I hurt you?” Taylor asks slowly, but starts moving closer to Karlie.

“Probably,” Karlie admits, “but I can manage for a little while.”

In the darkness, she can just make out the smile on Taylor’s face as she tries to find a way to lie close to Karlie.

“Can you lie on your side and put your head sort of halfway on top of my shoulder here?” Karlie asks, and Taylor tries it out. 

“What about my arm?” she asks, “the cast makes it heavy and I can’t just rest that on top of you. You’ll scream.”

Karlie thinks about it for a split second. “Put your pillow in my lap and rest your arm on top of that. I think that should be fine.”

Taylor carefully does as she’s told and lies her head down on Karlie’s shoulder. They lie in silence, taking comfort in each other’s warmth. The world seems to be just a little bit nicer again, at least until the pain starts to overwhelm Karlie and she grits her teeth, not wanting to disappoint Taylor by asking her to untangle herself. When her brain screams at her so loudly she doesn’t know what to focus on anymore, she kisses Taylor’s hair before letting her know she needs to move. “Babe,” she says, her voice quiet but strained, and she can feel Taylor stir. 

“Yeah?”

“Pain,” Karlie just says and Taylor immediately moves her arm away from Karlie’s lap before she slides down from her shoulder and onto the mattress. She doesn’t move further away than that, but rolls over on her back with Karlie’s left arm slumped over her shoulder, and falls asleep.


	20. Chapter 20

The next few days pass slowly for Karlie and even slower for Taylor. After a day in bed next to Taylor, having quiet conversations whenever Taylor wasn’t sleeping, Karlie starts getting restless. She follows her doctor’s advice and gets out of bed on the third day after the accident, leaving Taylor alone to rest in the dark and silent bedroom.

She calls for her mother to come help her in the bathroom and grits her teeth as she helps her out of the sling. She likes to think she's comfortable with nudity, being naked in front of people on a regular basis is kind of part of her job after all, so she's surprised at how weird this feels. Her mother helping her out of her clothes is something that hasn't happened since she was old enough to dress herself, and it manages to make her blush just slightly. 

“I know, sweetie,” her mother says, as if she can read Karlie’s mind, and turns around to put away the clothes.

Standing in front of the mirror, Karlie looks at the huge, deep purple bruise on the side of her chest and she studies it for a while.

“It looks horrible,” Tracy remarks, “how’s the pain?”

“Manageable right now,” Karlie replies, her eyes flicking towards the shower, “but I’m not looking forward to this little adventure.” 

“We’ll get it done as quickly and gently as possible,” her mother promises.

Karlie feels like she’s five years old again when she steps into that shower, her mother helping her wash her hair, but she’s glad to have her there. Karlie's arm hangs limply by her side and her entire focus is on not shaking it whenever the now-familiar tingling feeling comes crawling down it. She’s sure she would not have fared so well in the shower if she would have had to do this alone. 

By the time her mother has helped her put on some clothes and coaxed her arm back into the sling, she’s exhausted. _When will this end?_ she thinks to herself as her mother again helps her into bed next to Taylor.

She spends the next hour daydreaming about what it will be like when she can finally move around freely again. 

***

Two days later, on Sunday, Austin comes over for the small and belated birthday party they're throwing for him. 

Karlie is in the kitchen with Andrea, watching her put the finishing touches on his birthday cake, when the doorbell rings. 

“I got it,” Tracy calls out from the living room and soon Karlie can hear the door being opened.

She listens to Austin and Tracy introducing themselves to each other and smiles. Pieces of their conversation make their way into the kitchen and Karlie feels like her ears are straining themselves to listen in on it.

“It’s so lovely to finally meet you,” Karlie hears her mother say. “Karlie has talked so much about you.”

A hand on Karlie’s shoulder startles her a little and she gasps, both from the surprise and the pain.

“Oh my goodness,” Andrea says quickly, “I didn’t mean to startle you.”

“No, it’s okay. I was just trying to listen in on their conversation.” 

“I know,” Andrea replies with a wink. “I was going to tell you to go join them, I’m almost done here.”

Karlie looks at the cake and smiles. 

“Are you sure? It looks beautiful, by the way.”

“I’m sure. Go.” Andrea smiles and returns to working on the cake. “And thank you, sweetie!”

Karlie smiles as she gingerly moves off of the stool she’s been sitting on and walks out of the kitchen.

“Hey, there she is,” Austin says happily and approaches her for a hug.

“You can hug me, but do not squeeze hard because I can promise you I will scream,” Karlie warns and he immediately readjusts himself, hugging her with one arm, their chests barely touching. 

“How are you feeling?” he asks.

“Not as horrible as I did on Wednesday, so I guess that’s something.”

“Yeah,” he says, “better than nothing, right? And how is my sister?”

“She’s a little bit of a hermit these days. Too much light or sound drains her quickly, but she promised she would join us for a cake a little later.”

“That’s good,” Austin says with a smile.

“Hey, I’m sorry we kind of ruined your birthday weekend a bit,” Karlie says suddenly, and Austin chuckles.

“It’s not like you could have done anything to prevent it,” he replies. “Don’t beat yourself up over it. Sure, it was a little different than planned but I’ve still had a great weekend, not to mention the fact that I’m about to stuff my face with cake. I say it’s been an alright weekend after all.”

Karlie smiles at his reply but she still feels sad for missing out on his birthday weekend. She knows Taylor had been looking forward to it, planning a bunch of fun activities for the whole family, and Karlie was going to bake a beautiful cake for him. 

Her thoughts are interrupted by the sound of a door closing, and she turns around slowly to see Taylor walking towards them. 

“Teffy!” Austin calls out, “is Karlie shining so much these days you have to wear sunglasses inside the house to look at her?”

“Oh, shut it,” Taylor replies, but she smiles as she walks up to him and gives him a hug.

Once she breaks the embrace, she walks over to Karlie and gives her a kiss. “Hey baby.”

“Are you feeling okay?” Karlie asks her quietly, and Taylor nods.

“Yeah, I’m feeling a bit better actually. The headache isn’t so horrible today.”

They move into the living room and sit down. Tracy quickly brings Karlie a pillow to put behind her shoulder before she walks into the kitchen to join Andrea, leaving them alone to chat. Karlie lets the two siblings catch up for a while and quietly strokes Taylor’s back while she listens to their conversation.

Fifteen minutes later, Tracy pops her head back into the living room. 

“Are you guys ready for some cake?” she asks just as Andrea walks out with the cake. 

“Happy birthday, Austin!!!” they all yell in unison, Taylor pressing her thumb into her right ear and Karlie covering the left with her hand to block some of the sound out. 

They chat, eat cake and enjoy themselves, but after a while Taylor hugs her brother and excuses herself from the celebrations. Karlie slowly follows her into the bedroom, feeling a little worried about her, but Taylor smiles at her as soon as the bedroom door is closed. 

“I’m fine, Kar,” she says and strokes Karlie’s cheek softly, “I just need to rest. It feels like all the contents in my head are swimming around in a vortex at the moment and I really need for it to stop. You should go back out there, keep him company and eat some more cake.”

“Okay,” Karlie says, leaning in to kiss Taylor lightly on the lips. Resting her forehead on Taylor’s for a second, she closes her eyes. “I miss getting to spend time with you all day.”

“I know,” Taylor whispers, “I miss it too.”

“I’ll come back to check on you in a while,” Karlie murmurs, and with a kiss on the cheek she leaves Taylor in the bedroom to rest.

***

The following afternoon, Karlie is in the bedroom resting for a short while before she leaves for the hospital, because showering and getting dressed took a lot out of her. Taylor hasn't said a word to her since Karlie returned to the bedroom, as she found her pacing on the floor beside the bed, her phone in her hand, occasionally muttering voice notes into it. Karlie wants to ask if she's okay, but she knows from experience that she shouldn't disturb her girlfriend when she's trying to get a song idea down.

After a short silence, Taylor lets out a loud growl and throws her phone onto the bed where it bounces and lands right next to Karlie. Taylor leans her forehead onto the wall and mutters angry words to herself, clearly not giving a second thought to her phone and where it landed. Karlie decides that songwriting or not, she needs to do something, so she carefully gets up and walks over to Taylor.

When she’s close enough, standing right beside her, she reaches out her hand and gently places it on Taylor’s back, but she's met by Taylor’s hand pushing her back irritably, the palm of her hand pressing into her chest, _hard_. 

“Don’t,” Taylor says almost simultaneously as Karlie yelps loudly, tears welling in her eyes.

“Ow! What the fuck, Taylor?” Karlie yells out, her voice shaky as she tries to control the pain that ripples through her.

Taylor turns around quickly and looks at Karlie with a shocked expression on her face. Upon seeing the tears in Karlie’s face, she takes a small step backwards, crashing into the wall as she throws her hand over her mouth.

“Oh my God,” she whispers, tears forming in her own eyes, “I am so sorry, I didn’t mean to do that. I wasn't thinking.”

Karlie glares at Taylor through her tears, wiping them away with her good hand.

Taylor’s eyes suddenly brim over and sobs erupt from her, softening Karlie’s gaze. 

“I don’t know why I did that,” Taylor sobs, “I am just so frustrated because I’ve had a new song in my head this entire week but every time I try to get something down on my phone, it slips away from me, and there’s nothing I can do to make it stop.” 

Tears stream down Taylor’s face and Karlie’s heart breaks for her. She gingerly walks closer to Taylor and pulls her in, holding her as close as she can without everything hurting, and kisses her hair.

“I’m so sorry,” Taylor cries into Karlie’s chest, “I’m a horrible person.”

“You’re not a horrible person, Tay,” Karlie whispers soothingly into Taylor’s ear. She puts her hand on Taylor’s chin, tilting it up to meet her gaze. She uses her thumb to wipe Taylor’s tears away. “I wish I could go back in time and do something to prevent this from happening.”

“I’m so sorry I hurt you,” Taylor whispers again.

“I forgive you,” Karlie says before she leans in to give Taylor a kiss.

Just then, Tracy knocks on the door right before opening it and popping her head inside. 

“Are you guys okay in here? I thought I heard shouting.”

“Yeah, we’re fine, mom,” Karlie says, turning her head to look at her mother.

“Good,” Tracy says with a smile, “Are you ready to go? We can’t be late for your appointment, you know.”

“Yeah, I’ll be right out.”

Turning towards Taylor again, she strokes her hair slowly. “Do you want to come with me?”

“No,” Taylor replies, her voice hoarse from crying. “I’ll just see you when you come back.”

“Okay,” Karlie replies. “Don’t beat yourself up over this, okay? I love you, Princess.”

Taylor nods. “I love you too.”

***

When Karlie and Tracy come home three hours later, they find Taylor and Andrea sitting in the living room. 

Taylor looks up at Karlie as she enters and smiles. “Hey, how did it go? What did they say?”

Karlie slowly sinks down onto the couch before answering. “It was alright, I guess. They took another MRI to have a look at what’s going on in there, and said it looked pretty good.”

“That’s good,” Taylor replies, “what about the tingling in your arm?”

“It’s almost gone now, so they said it should recover properly soon. I got to talk to a physical therapist for a little bit too, she talked me through some of the exercises I need to do, but told me to go through them with the physical therapist I’ll use when we get back to New York.” 

“These are all good things, but you don’t sound particularly happy right now. What is it you’re not telling me?”

Karlie sighs and looks down on her lap. “It’s nothing overly serious. I’m just a little annoyed.”

Taylor looks at her with a puzzled stare. “Not at me, right?”

“No, not at you,” Karlie says and smiles. “I just asked them when they assumed I could go back to work and I didn’t like the answer. I’ll probably be missing out on a lot more shoots than what I originally thought and it bothers me.”

“That sucks,” Taylor says, “but you’ll be back at it soon. In the meantime you get to spend all of your days with me. I’m looking forward to that.” She smiles slyly at Karlie and Karlie chuckles.

“I suppose you're right.”

“Speaking of New York though,” Taylor says, “what do you say we go back there tomorrow?”

“Are you feeling well enough for that?”

“I hope so,” Taylor says skeptically, “I'm just really tired of being here. LA is nice and all, and I love this house, but the plan was never to stay here for this long.”

“That’s true. I have to admit I miss it. It will be good to get home.”

“It will,” Taylor says with a smile. “Noon sound okay to you?”

“Sounds perfect.” 

She returns the smile, suddenly realizing how much better it makes her feel to know that they will finally get to go home, how great it will feel to be in a place that won’t feel so tainted by their accident. She’s ready to move on.


	21. Chapter 21

Karlie is sitting in Taylor’s living room, reading a book and waiting for Tree to stop by. 

Being back in New York has been relaxing to both her and Taylor, even though the flight there was everything but. They were both hoping for a nice and relaxing flight, but the noise from the engines and the constant change in air pressure turned the trip into a true nightmare for Taylor, who alternately cried and threw up from the time they took off until the time they landed. 

For Karlie, the flight was relatively okay, but seeing Taylor so distressed without being able to do anything about it was upsetting, and she silently cursed the paparazzi who had done this to them. Not being able to properly hold her girlfriend, she spent the flight sitting next to her holding her hand and making sure she stayed hydrated in between her nausea spells. 

Taylor was exhausted by the time they got to the apartment and spent the next two days in bed before she managed to muster up some energy to get her life going again, only interrupted by a trip to the hospital to get her stitches taken out.

Now, five days after they left LA, they are meeting up with Tree to talk about the last two weeks.

Karlie hears soft footsteps from the hallway and puts her book down on the table just as Taylor walks into view. She walks over to Karlie and sits down next to her, kissing Karlie’s good shoulder.

“How are you feeling?” Karlie asks and puts her arm around Taylor, pulling her closer.

“Tired,” Taylor replies, “but I feel like I’m slowly getting back to being me again.”

“That’s really good,” Karlie says and kisses the side of Taylor’s forehead. “Maybe that means we can send my mom home soon. I am starting to need some alone time. It’s not that I don’t appreciate her being here, we wouldn’t have managed on our own, but I’m getting a little antsy.”

Taylor laughs. “I totally understand what you mean. It’s going to be really good to get back to normal again.”

Their conversation is interrupted by the sound of the doorbell ringing. 

“I’ll get it,” Tracy calls out from the kitchen.

The girls get up and make their way to greet Tree in the hallway.

“Hey girls,” she says, smiling at them. “How are you?”

“We’re pretty good,” Karlie says and returns the smile.

“I brought us some donuts,” Tree says and holds up a small box. 

“Yum!” Taylor exclaims happily. “Did you get the kind with sprinkles?”

“You know it.”

“You’re amazing,” Taylor says and grins. “Let’s get started then.”

They walk back to the living room and sit down. Tree places the donuts on the table and Taylor greedily opens the box to grab one.

“Here,” she shoves the box closer to Karlie, “have one.”

“Oh God, no,” Karlie says. “Are you aware of how much crap I’ve been eating lately? I haven’t been to the gym at all either.”

“Oh, come on, Karlie. You know you want to.”

Karlie chuckles as she considers it. She is really tempted to reach out and get one out of the box, but she already feels like she’s going to have to double her efforts when she’s well enough to exercise again. Shaking her head, she shoves the box back towards the middle of the table.

“Maybe later.”

“You snooze, you lose, Karlie,” Taylor warns teasingly.

“It’s okay, you can have mine,” Karlie replies, rolling her eyes lovingly.

“Alright,” Taylor says, “but you’re missing out.”

Grabbing the second donut, Taylor leans back in her seat and turns to Tree. “Should we begin?”

“Let’s,” Tree says. “First, I’d like to just say I’m really happy to see you are both on the mend. I can’t even imagine how horrible this has been for you and I hope you never have to go through any of this again. Now, as horrible as this has been, I think we can safely say that in terms of how the public feels about you, it’s actually done you some good. I’ve been reviewing the reactions online, and the public is sympathetic to you right now and I think this is going to be a good thing as you two start being more affectionate towards each other in public.”

“I suppose that’s good,” Karlie says slowly and looks at Taylor, who nods attentively. 

“It is. However, I still think we should stick to the schedule we have already agreed on. I don’t know how much your injuries will change your schedule, Karlie, but I assume you won’t be going back to work for a while?”

“Probably not until late April,” Karlie says with a sigh. “Even if I’m out of this sling next week, I’ve been told it can take weeks before I can move my arm normally again, and who knows how long my ribs will continue to be painful.”

Taylor grabs Karlie’s hand and rubs her thumb softly over the back of it, coaxing a small smile out of Karlie. 

“I understand,” Tree says and smiles sympathetically towards Karlie. “I take it that means you’ll spend most of your time here with Taylor, which is totally fine. Maybe the two of you should take advantage of this whole situation and spend some time outside of the apartment as well. Let the public see you, but bring some other friends too.”

“I was actually thinking maybe Taylor and I should go out for lunch soon,” Karlie replies and looks over at Taylor. “If you feel up for it, of course.”

“I think that would be really nice,” Taylor says, “I’m so tired of staring at the same walls, day in and day out.”

“Same here,” Karlie admits before she turns her gaze back to Tree. “Is that something we can do, like, by ourselves?”

Tree thinks about it for a short second. “Yeah, most definitely. I think that the public will think it’s a good thing to see you out and about after your accident. Let them know you’re injured, but you’re fine.”

“Good,” Karlie says.

“Just let me know before you go so I am informed.”

“Yes, of course,” Taylor nods. 

“But back to the schedule for a second,” Tree says and looks at Karlie. “Have you talked to Josh about going with you to the Met Gala as your date?”

“Not really, but I’m sure he won’t mind going. He normally does anyway.”

“It's only a friend date, though, right?” Taylor asks teasingly.

“Of course, silly,” Karlie responds, “my real date will be you, except no one will know that.” 

Taylor giggles and brings Karlie’s hand up to her lips to kiss it.

Tree looks at them with her eyebrow cocked. “None of that stuff on your lunch date, right, girls? Save it for late June like we planned, please.” she says with a short laugh.

“We will,” Taylor says reassuringly, “or, well, I will at least. I can’t speak for miss heart-eyes over here.”

“Hey,” Karlie exclaims, “that’s so not cool. I can keep my cool in public.”

“Can you?” Taylor sends her a wicked smile, causing Karlie to laugh.

“Oh, shut it,” Karlie says and turns back towards Tree again. “I’ll make sure to keep my lips off of this one in public for a while longer.”

“Good,” Tree says with a smile. 

***

The following afternoon, Karlie and Taylor are in the bathroom together, getting ready. For the first time since the accident, Karlie wanted to try showering by herself, only having Taylor there to help her with her hair and sling. “It’s the one thing we need to be able to do by ourselves before you leave,” she told her mother and Tracy agreed.

“I think that went alright,” Karlie says once they’re out of the shower, both of them standing half-naked in front of the mirror.

“I’m sure we’ll get better at it,” Taylor replies as she attempts to get her arm free of the watertight protective bag. “Do you think you can give me a hand with this?”

“Yeah, sure,” Karlie says and lets go of her towel to grab hold of the plastic, causing her towel to fall down onto the floor.

Taylor stares at her with a grin, but when her eyes reach the large bruise on Karlie’s ribcage, the grin falters. She stops fussing with the plastic on her arm and brushes her fingers lightly over the deep burgundy skin, so lightly Karlie can barely feel it. 

“Hey,” Karlie says, bringing Taylor’s eyes up to meet her own, “it’s getting better, even though it might not look like it. You should have seen it last week.”

“You mean it was even worse than this?” Taylor asks, her eyes wide.

“Yeah… But let’s not dwell on that,” Karlie replies. “Let’s get your arm out of this plastic thing so you can help me get dressed.”

“Let’s.”

***

Several long minutes later, the girls walk down the stairs and into the kitchen.

“I see you managed just fine without me,” Tracy says approvingly as the girls enter the kitchen.

“Yeah,” Karlie says, “it just took a little more effort than usual.”

“We’ll find our rhythm,” Taylor says and looks affectionately at Karlie.

Tracy looks from Taylor to Karlie and chuckles. “I see you’re matching today.”

Karlie looks down at her turquoise plaid shirt and black jeans. “Are we?” She looks over at Taylor and notices her skirt is patterned with black and turquoise stripes. “Oh,” she says as she realizes and laughs. “I guess we do this a lot.”

“It just sort of happens,” Taylor chimes in and grins.

“And hey, we are sling twins too today,” Karlie jokes but Taylor doesn’t laugh.

“I kind of wish we weren’t,” she says and scrunches her nose in disgust. “I can’t believe you’re making me go out in public wearing this thing.”

“Oh, shush,” Karlie tuts, “you can’t hide in this place forever. I, for one, am dying to go outside, even if it’s only for some coffee.”

“I know, I know,” Taylor replies, “I actually want to go. I’m getting so bored of staring at these walls. If only I could watch TV again.” She sighs and Karlie gives her a kiss on the cheek.

“You’ll be back to normal soon enough,” she says comfortingly. “Should we go?”

“Yes, while my head is still in the game.”

Karlie walks over to her mom to give her hug. “We should be back in a few hours.”

“Alright,” Tracy says, “have fun, girls!”

“We will,” Karlie says as she turns around. She grabs Taylor’s hand and together they slowly make their way to the door and downstairs to the car that’s already waiting for them.

***

Fifteen minutes later, Taylor’s SUV pulls up in front of a small coffee shop on Karlie’s street.

“Are you sure there won’t be that many people in here?” Taylor asks for the third time.

“I’m sure, Tay,” Karlie replies. “A lot of people go here, but not at this time of day. I should know, I’ve been coming here since I moved into my place.”

Taylor looks at her skeptically but doesn’t say anything. 

“Look, if it gets to be too noisy, we can just take our coffee back to my place. Okay?” She gazes hopefully into Taylor’s bright blue eyes until Taylor nods and smiles.

“Okay,” she says reluctantly and puts on her sunglasses. “Let’s do this.”

Mike holds the door open for them and Taylor exits the car first. Karlie follows slowly, and gasps as she attempts to get up from the seat. Taylor quickly reaches out her hand to lend her support, and Karlie grabs it and gingerly pulls herself up and out of the car. 

“Who knew getting out of a car would be so difficult?” she mutters to herself as the car door is shut behind them.

“Um, Tay?” Karlie asks quizzically as she stares down at their still interlocked hands.

Taylor looks down for a split second before she looks up at Karlie and shrugs, moving towards the door of the café. 

_Tree is going to kill us_ , Karlie thinks to herself as she quickly looks around to see if anyone is watching. Not spotting anyone paying any attention to them, she relaxes a little and enters the café.

Inside the café, she leads Taylor to a table in the back. There are a few other people in the café, sipping their coffees, chatting with their friends, or busying themselves with their phones or laptops.

“Is this okay? Or is it too noisy for you?” Karlie asks Taylor quietly as they sit down, and Taylor shakes her head.

“No, I can survive this for a while.”

“Good. I’ll go get us coffee so just sit here and I’ll be back.”

Karlie makes her way over to the counter and smiles at the barista.

“Hey Cammie,” she exclaims happily when it’s her turn.

“Karlie! Oh, look at you. How are you, darling?” 

“Not too bad,” Karlie replies, “Been better, obviously, but you can’t change the past.”

“That is a good way of looking at it,” Cammie says, “so I see you brought a girl today. You look... close. Anything I should know?” She winks playfully at Karlie and chuckles, and Karlie can feel her cheeks heat up a little.

“Oh Cammie, you know I don’t kiss and tell. But no, Taylor and I are just out for coffee – you know I have a boyfriend.”

“Yes, so you keep telling me, yet I have never met this elusive and mysterious young man. You should bring him in sometime.”

Karlie laughs as she thinks about how well Cammie seems to know her. “I will make sure to do that sometime.”

“Good,” Cammie says with a smile, “now, what can I get you and your friend today?”

“I’ll have one skinny caramel latte for Taylor and one almond milk latte for me. And, can you bring it to our table? It’s kind of hard to carry two coffees with this thing,” Karlie asks and points at her sling.

“Of course, sweetie. I’ll be right there.”

Karlie has barely sat back down when Cammie brings their coffees over. Putting the coffees down on the table, she pulls a chair over and sits down for a few seconds.

“This is Cammie,” Karlie tells Taylor. “Cammie, Taylor. Taylor, Cammie.”

“It’s lovely to meet you,” Cammie says, “Karlie talks about you a lot.”

“So I hear,” Taylor laughs and glances over at Karlie, who blushes. “It’s lovely to meet you too.”

“I have to say, when I read about your accident a few weeks ago, I was absolutely horrified. I was honestly really worried about you,” Cammie says and looks over at Karlie. “But I’m so glad you came in here today so I could see that you’re okay.” Turning towards Taylor, Cammie leans close to Taylor and whispers “you know, Karlie’s my favorite customer.”

“Is she now?” Taylor murmurs with a smile. “See, everybody loves you, Karlie.”

“Oh God,” Karlie mutters, feeling very embarrassed, “please stop.”

Cammie laughs and stands up. “I’ll leave you two to it,” she says and winks at Karlie.

“Thanks, “Karlie says and laughs. “Sorry if we bring the paparazzi to your doorstep today by the way.”

“At least this thing can guilt them into being nice,” Taylor says and lightly shakes her arm inside of the sling. 

“Don’t worry about it, girls,” Cammie replies happily, “I’m just glad to see you’re okay.” Turning towards Taylor, she places her hand lightly on Taylor’s shoulder. “I hope to see you again sometime, Taylor. You take care now, both of you.” With a final glance at the girls, Cammie walks away, leaving the girls alone to drink their coffee in peace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! I know I usually post an update every week but next week is Easter and it's also my nephew's birthday, and so there will be a lot of family events happening and I just don't know if I'll have time to write anything next week. So if I don't, please know the update will be here as soon as possible. The story keeps churning in my head every single day so don't worry, okay? :)


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HAPPY EASTER SURPRISE!

An hour and a half later, Taylor and Karlie walk through the door to Taylor’s apartment. 

“Hey,” Tracy says as she greets them in the hallway. “Did you have fun?”

“Yeah,” Karlie says, “it was nice to get out of the house for a while.” 

“How are you feeling, sweetie?” Tracy asks and looks at Taylor. “You look exhausted.”

“A little overwhelmed and overstimulated,” Taylor mutters as she leans her head down on Karlie’s good shoulder. 

Karlie strokes her hand over Taylor’s hair and kisses her forehead. “Go upstairs and lie down for a while. I’ll come get you in a while when it’s time for dinner.”

Taylor nods slightly and heads towards the stairs. 

Tracy puts her hand softly on Taylor’s shoulder as she walks by. “Feel better, sweetie.”

“Thanks,” Taylor says and musters up a small smile before she starts dragging her tired body up the stairs. 

As Taylor reaches the landing above, Karlie makes her way towards the kitchen, signaling for her mother to join her. 

“Poor thing,” Tracy says as they sit down at the kitchen counter. 

“I know,” Karlie says quietly. “I can’t wait for her to finally get better so we can go back to normal.”

“But you did have fun?”

“Yeah, we did. It was really nice. Had a chat with Cammie, introduced her to Taylor and yeah… It was lovely. I think she knows though. Or suspects.”

Tracy laughs. “Does she?”

“You know that look people have when they know something you’re trying to hide? Yeah, she had that look on her face when I walked in with Taylor.” 

“Do you think it’s a problem that she knows?”

Karlie thinks about it for a second. “No, not really. I don’t think she would ever tell anyone even if I would have confirmed it, which I didn’t. I just reminded her that I have a boyfriend and now she wants me to bring him in. I guess I should do that sometime…”

Tracy puts a comforting hand on her daughter’s. “I’m sure Joshua won’t mind.”

“That’s just it, though,” Karlie says, “he won’t mind at all. Oh mom, I can’t imagine what the world will say about him when Taylor and I finally come out.”

“I know, sweetie, but he’s a big boy. He can take care of himself.”

“I guess…” Karlie says and sighs.

Tracy gazes sympathetically at Karlie and squeezes her hand. “I want to remind you of what you told me when you were home for Christmas. All of this is worth it, you said, all of it. And I agree, and I think Joshua agrees as well, otherwise you wouldn’t have pulled this off for so long. Keep your eyes on the prize and remind yourself that good things will come from this.”

She gets up and wraps her arms around Karlie, giving her a long and comforting hug.

“You’re absolutely right,” Karlie mumbles into her mother’s hair before she breaks the hug. “Once all this will be over and done with, we'll have a new normal and it will be such a good thing.”

“Speaking of normalcy,” Tracy says, “while you and Taylor were out, I decided that my time here is up. You don’t really need me anymore, you two can manage just fine on your own.”

“As much as I've loved having you here, I'll admit it's going to be good to get to be alone again,” Karlie replies, relieved she didn’t have to be the one to bring it up. 

“I figured as much,” Tracy laughs, “so I already went ahead and called your dad to get him to come pick me up tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow?”

“What, did you want me gone today?” Tracy teases and Karlie laughs.

“No, I was just surprised. I’m not really sure how I was expecting it to go, to be honest,” she admits. “Tomorrow sounds fine though, yeah.”

“It’s been really lovely staying with you two, even though the circumstances could have been better. You’ve got a nice place here.”

“Thanks mom, but it’s…” Karlie says but Tracy interrupts her.

“It is most definitely both of yours, not just Taylor’s.” She winks at her daughter, who blushes and looks away. 

“Okay, you’re right,” Karlie replies with a grin, “but I really can’t take the credit for the decorating, that’s all Taylor.”

“She’s got good taste.”

“I know,” Karlie says. Her eyes glaze over into that dreamy look she always gets when she thinks about Taylor, causing her mother to laugh.

“Oh Karlie…” Tracy says and shakes her head lovingly.

“I think I’ll go check on her, just to make sure she’s okay,” Karlie says, a faint hint of redness just visible on her cheeks as she gets up, leaving her mother behind in the kitchen. 

***

The following afternoon, Karlie is in the hallway with Tracy, waiting for her dad to arrive upstairs at the apartment. Already having said goodbye to Tracy, Taylor has gone back into the living room, leaving Karlie alone with her mother.

“Thank you again for staying with us for these past two weeks, mom,” Karlie says as she gives her mother a big hug. “I don’t know what I would have done without you.” 

“It’s been my pleasure, darling. And remember, if there is anything the two of you need, I’m just a phone call away. Don’t hesitate to call if things aren’t going so well after all, okay?” Tracy softly strokes Karlie’s cheek and smiles.

“I will, mom, I promise.”

There’s a knock on the door and Kurt pops his head in to say hello.

“Hey pumpkin, how’s the shoulder?” he says and hugs Karlie carefully. 

“It’s getting better, dad,” Karlie replies with a smile. 

“That’s great.” Kurt looks over at Tracy and grabs her suitcase. “Are you ready to go?”

“Yeah, I’m all set.” Tracy leans in to hug Karlie again. “Goodbye, sweetie. Remember, call me if there is anything.”

“Yes, mom, I’ll call,” Karlie replies and chuckles. “Now please go.”

Once her parents are finally out the door, Karlie walks into the living room where Taylor is sitting on the couch. She stops in the doorway for a second, leaning her head on the side of the doorframe and listens to the calm serenity that has spread through the apartment. _Finally alone again_ , she thinks as she lets her eyes wander over to Taylor, who is absentmindedly petting Olivia while she’s doing something on her phone. A sudden urge to celebrate the occasion surges through Karlie, and she smiles to herself as she recognizes what it is. It’s been so long since she’s felt Taylor’s warm skin on hers and she can feel her heartbeat speed up just by imagining it.

Walking up to Taylor, she gently crawls onto her lap, pinning her down.

“Oh hey,” Taylor says, her eyes meeting Karlie’s just as Karlie puts her hand on Taylor’s cheek, bringing their faces close together for a kiss.

“Did you know,” Karlie says and kisses her, “it’s been nearly 6 weeks,” another kiss, “since we had some,” and another, “quality time together?” 

“Mmm…” Taylor just responds, her eyes halfway shut from pleasure. 

She carefully hooks her injured arm around Karlie’s lower back, holding Karlie close while avoiding putting pressure on her sore ribs. Her right hand slips underneath the backside of Karlie’s t-shirt, sending a shiver up her spine as she lets her fingers run up and down Karlie’s back.

“I want you so bad right now,” Karlie whispers in between kisses, and Taylor whimpers underneath her as Karlie places kisses down Taylor’s jawline, continuing downwards onto her neck.

“Same,” Taylor manages to get out and takes a deep breath. “Let’s go upstairs. I want you out of those clothes.” Her voice is thick, quivering, and full of tension, dripping with lust, and it takes almost all of Karlie’s willpower to break her lips away from her, even if it’s only for a couple of minutes. 

They make their way upstairs hand in hand, whispering sweet words into each other’s ears and giggling. 

Once they've made it to the bedroom, their lips meet again as their hands fumble with each other’s clothing, undressing each other.

“We need to take this off,” Taylor whispers in between kisses and starts fumbling with Karlie’s sling. Moving to Karlie’s right side, she carefully removes it while placing soft kisses on Karlie’s wrist and arm. Pulling off Karlie’s t-shirt, Karlie now standing naked in front of her, she continues kissing her arm, moving up to her shoulder and neck. Standing behind Karlie now, Taylor’s fingers play with Karlie’s hair as she nuzzles the tip of her nose down Karlie’s back as she kisses her, and another shiver runs down Karlie’s back.

“Tay…,” Karlie murmurs softly, not wanting Taylor to stop at all, but knowing she has to for just a second.

“Mmm?” Taylor murmurs in reply, not letting her lips leave Karlie’s skin.

“I need the sling back on.”

“Oh!” Taylor says, standing up abruptly. “Of course, sorry, I got carried away.” She picks up the sling from the edge of the bed where she had dropped it, and helps Karlie back into it.

“Don’t be sorry,” Karlie laughs as she fastens the sling around her neck.

Standing in front of Karlie, Taylor lets her eyes run over Karlie’s body. They linger on Karlie’s bruise for a second before she leans in and softly places a kiss on it, causing Karlie to gasp.

Taylor moves away immediately. “Sorry,” she says, “did I hurt you?”

“No,” Karlie reassures her, “I just didn’t expect that. It’s still tender, but that was fine. I promise.” Her hand is on Taylor’s face now, slowly caressing her cheek as she looks deep into her eyes and smiles. Leaning in, she kisses her hungrily, keeping her lips on Taylor's as she takes a step forward so their bodies are inches apart. 

“I need you to tell me if I hurt you in any way tonight,” Taylor mumbles in between kisses. “Maybe we should have a safeword?”

“How about I just tell you to move if I need you to?” Karlie responds huskily.

Before Taylor can respond, Karlie kisses her again. She runs her good hand down Taylor’s side and feels the goosebumps erupting on Taylor’s skin. When she trails her fingers down Taylor’s back and grabs one of Taylor’s butt cheeks, Taylor whimpers just loud enough for Karlie to hear. Knowing she has Taylor adequately flustered, she brings her hand back to Taylor’s front, softly massaging her breast while adding teeth to their kisses, nibbling softly on Taylor’s lower lip. She uses her entire body to push Taylor backward towards the bed until they can’t go any further. Moving her lips down to Taylor’s collarbones, she slips her hand in between Taylor’s legs, letting her fingers run in circles on Taylor’s inner thighs, making Taylor moan softly. 

She brings her hand up to Taylor’s chest and pushes her down on the edge of the bed.

“I can’t lie on top of you,” Karlie says, “so don’t move further up.”

Taylor only nods and waves her hand in response, urging Karlie to stop talking and continue. 

Chuckling, Karlie lowers herself down onto her knees and kisses Taylor’s thighs, moving closer and closer to her core, letting her lips do all the work until Taylor squirms on the bed in front of her.

While Taylor comes down from her high, Karlie awkwardly gets back up from the floor and lies down next to her on the bed. She kisses Taylor’s shoulder until Taylor rolls over and moves further up in the bed. 

“Whoa,” Taylor whispers, “what a headrush.”

The comment makes Karlie giggle. “I’m glad,” she murmurs happily.

Taylor leans in and kisses Karlie and forces her down on her back.

“Do you need a pillow?” she asks Karlie between kisses.

“Yeah, please.”

“Alright, roll over on your side again,” Taylor says, laying her own pillow down underneath Karlie’s shoulder. “Better?”

“Better.”

Taylor replies with a smile, her eyes twinkling mischievously as she puts her lips on Karlie again. She leaves her left arm on Karlie’s stomach, running her fingers in circles around her belly button. The sensation from Taylor’s soft fingers paired with the rough exterior of Taylor’s cast scratching softly across Karlie’s skin is enough to send a shiver down Karlie’s spine and she whimpers.

Taylor moves her lips down to Karlie’s neck, taking her time kissing every inch of it before she moves on to her collarbones and chest, all while her arm is still running over Karlie’s stomach. 

As Taylor reaches Karlie’s breast, running her tongue around Karlie’s nipple in between kisses, her cheek brushes against Karlie’s fingers sticking out of the sling, and Karlie softly caresses her. She has her eyes closed, the various sensations almost overwhelming her with pleasure and she wriggles ever so slightly underneath Taylor. A sound escapes her mouth as she wishes Taylor would move a little more quickly down her body. Taylor seems to pick up on her impatience because she suddenly repositions herself further down, placing kisses in quick succession down Karlie’s ribs and stomach. 

Again she repositions herself, moving in between Karlie’s legs. She hooks her broken arm around one of Karlie’s thighs, softly tickling it as she runs her lips up and down Karlie’s inner thigh. 

“Tay…” Karlie moans loudly, the soft kisses getting her so worked up that she feels like it won't take much once Taylor stops teasing her.

Taylor finally moves her lips away from Karlie’s thighs. Karlie glances down at her and meets Taylor’s mischievous stare, the only part of Taylor that is visible. Taylor’s eyes sparkle as Karlie holds her gaze until Taylor’s mouth brings Karlie over the edge.

A slight pain from her shoulder mixes with the pleasure as Karlie sinks down into the mattress and she moans loudly, eyes rolling back.

Soon after, Taylor crawls back up and lies down beside her, kissing her softly before she settles in for a cuddle.


	23. Chapter 23

Nine days later, Karlie is in the kitchen making dinner after a long day. Finally sling-free, she carefully chops vegetables and layers them in an oven-safe dish in between a tomato base, béchamel and thin lasagna sheets, taking short breaks every now and then to rub carefully at her shoulder. 

She walks a few steps to get the cheese out of the fridge and almost trips over Olivia. “Scooch,” she says and moves the cat away with her foot, getting a meow in reply as Olivia runs away. Chuckling at the cat, she spreads the cheese over the top of her lasagna and lifts up the dish to put it into the oven, only to have it slip right out of her hands and slam back down onto the kitchen counter. 

“GOD DAMMIT!” she yells and rubs her shoulder again as sauce and cheese spill onto the counter. 

A second later, Taylor comes running into the kitchen. “Karlie, what’s the matter?” she asks, her voice shrill and her eyes wide. 

Seeing Karlie standing by the kitchen counter, defeated by a dish of lasagna, Taylor’s face quickly changes and she laughs loudly. “Oh, Karlie…” she says in between fits of laughter.

“I can’t lift the damn thing into the oven,” Karlie mumbles as Taylor checks out the damage to their dinner.

“Whoa,” she says as she feels the weight of the dish with her good arm. “Yeah, I can’t lift that thing either. Maybe lasagna should be off the menu until we’re not useless anymore,” she jokes, smiling at Karlie.

Karlie stares at the lasagna as tears well up into her eyes. She takes a shaky breath and turns her gaze toward Taylor, who immediately notices the tears.

“Oh no… babe, I was joking,” Taylor says sympathetically and puts her hand on Karlie’s face, wiping away a tear with her thumb. “Look, we can totally fix this. It’s not that bad. We’ll just scoop this cheese up and then we’ll…” 

A loud sob interrupts Taylor as all of Karlie’s frustrations decide to come pouring out of her all at once.

“Hey, hey, hey,” Taylor says softly and pulls Karlie in for a hug. Holding her tightly, she soothingly strokes Karlie’s back and kisses her hair, giving Karlie a moment to cry freely before asking her what’s wrong. 

After a few minutes, she breaks their embrace but keeps her injured arm hooked around Karlie’s waist. “Darling…” she coos soothingly, “tell me what’s wrong. Please.”

Karlie sniffles loudly, struggling to control her emotions long enough to put all of her frustrations into cohesive thoughts. “It’s just everything,” she finally says, her voice quivering just a little bit, “my stupid arm being stupid. I can’t lift anything, it aches constantly, and especially after therapy sessions. I hate them so much, they’re painful and boring and I can’t do anything with this stupid arm.”

“I know how much that sucks, believe me, but it’s only been three days since you got the sling off. It won’t magically get better in three days, you know that.” Taylor meets Karlie’s gaze with sincere and loving eyes, and Karlie looks away.

“I know you’re right…” Karlie mumbles, tears pressing behind her eyelids again. “It’s just… this has ruined so much for me. Do you know how many jobs I’ve had to turn down because of this?”

“I know…”

“And then today, today I get sent a snapchat from one of the girls who was hired for this one shoot I had to turn down, and they’re in an observatory. AN OBSERVATORY! Do you have any idea how amazing that shoot would have been? But I can’t have that, can I, because of this stupid arm.” In her frustration, Karlie shakes her arm violently and immediately whimpers in pain, tears running down her cheeks. 

“Oh my God, Karlie,” Taylor exclaims and hugs her girlfriend close again. 

“And now I’ve gone and made it worse,” Karlie sobs into Taylor’s hair, “and I’m so hungry and dinner is ruined and why can’t this day just end?”

“Shhh….” Taylor says comfortingly and strokes Karlie’s hair. “It will be okay. Dinner is not ruined, we’ll just put these bits of cheese back into the dish and then we’ll get it into that oven together. It sucks about the shoot, I know, but you’ll get better and you’ll get other opportunities. The important thing here is that you are getting better so you shouldn’t be so hard on yourself for things not going faster.” Giving Karlie a long kiss, she wipes Karlie’s tears away before gazing hopefully into her eyes. “Now, what do you say, Sunshine? Should we get this lasagna into the oven?”

Karlie can’t help but smile when being forced to stare into those brilliant blue eyes, and she uses her sleeve to wipe away the few tears Taylor didn’t get. 

“Okay,” she whispers with a nod as Taylor picks the cheese up from the counter.

“Okay, we’re all set,” she says as she opens the oven and puts her hand on the right side of the oven dish. “On three? One, two, three.”

Not long after, the delicious smell of melted cheese spreads through the apartment, making Karlie’s stomach growl hungrily. 

***

When Karlie wakes up the next morning, rolling over on her side to throw her arm over Taylor and snuggle, she finds the other side of the bed empty and cold. Confused by this discovery, she sits up and looks around. _No cats either_ , she thinks, _interesting_. 

She gets out of bed and finds the robe Taylor got her for her birthday, a thin, silky robe with fluffy kittens on it, and carefully guides her right arm into it before hurriedly pulling the rest of it on, making her way to the door. Opening it, she is hit with the smell of French toast causing her stomach to growl loudly. 

Walking down the stairs, a faint trickle of music finds its way to her ears and she smiles. Ever since the accident, the house has been quiet at all times and hearing the music coming from the kitchen makes Karlie realize just how much she’s missed it.

“You’re listening to music again!” she happily exclaims when she walks into the kitchen and finds Taylor standing by the stove.

Taylor jumps and lets out a small shriek. “You scared me!”

“Sorry,” Karlie replies sheepishly and walks over towards Taylor, stopping right next to her. 

“It’s okay,” Taylor says and leans in to give Karlie a morning kiss. “As long as the music isn’t too loud, my head is finally fine with it. Maybe I can watch TV again soon too!”

Karlie chuckles at that. “I really hope so, because I really want to have a movie night as soon as you’re ready for it.”

“I would absolutely love that,” Taylor says as she piles the French toast from the pan onto a plate. “Hey, can you go grab the juice from the fridge and put it on the table? Breakfast is almost ready.”

“Of course,” Karlie says and kisses Taylor on the cheek. “Thank you for surprising me with breakfast.”

“I figured you needed some cheering up after yesterday,” Taylor says, “but I’m serious about getting that juice.”

“I’m on it,” Karlie laughs.

Opening the fridge, she reaches for the juice and suddenly realizes that every item in the fridge is staring at her with googly eyes. A giggle escapes her as she taps the juice box and the eyes move. “Um, Tay…” she asks, turning towards Taylor, “why is the food staring at me?” 

Taylor meets her gaze with twinkling eyes and shrugs innocently. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, Karlie.”

Karlie grabs the juice and puts it on the counter next to the fridge before she carefully picks up an egg from the side of the door and walks back to stand next to Taylor. “So you mean to tell me that you have no idea why this,” she holds up the egg, making sure to shake it just a little so the eyes move, “suddenly sprouted eyes overnight?”

Taylor purses her lips together trying not to laugh, shaking her head. Karlie shakes the egg once more. “Hm?” 

She stares Taylor down, slowly moving her face closer to Taylor’s until Taylor involuntarily lets out a giggle and slaps her hand over her mouth, still shaking her head. 

Karlie lovingly rolls her eyes and pries Taylor’s hand away, revealing a grin on Taylor’s face. “I can’t believe my girlfriend is an actual five-year-old,” she teases and gives her a kiss.

“Hey, I managed to cheer you up so I mean, that should count for something,” Taylor remarks as she picks up the plate of food and slides away from Karlie to put it on the table.

“I know,” Karlie murmurs happily and sits down at the table. “Thank you. You’re the best girlfriend ever.”

“I knew you’d say that,” Taylor replies, her eyes shining with happiness. “You’re not so bad yourself,” she adds with a wink, causing Karlie to laugh. “Now, dig in before it gets cold.”

***

An hour later, Karlie is in the shower. She lingers under the hot water, knowing all too well she’s spending much longer than she normally would, but it’s so nice to finally be able to shower without assistance, at least on days when she doesn’t need to wash her hair, and today is not a day she needs to do that.

She lets the warmth soothe her aching shoulder that’s still sore from yesterday’s therapy session and tries to rid herself of all of the bad thoughts from yesterday. Finally feeling calm and relaxed, she turns off the water and steps out of the shower, picking up her towel.

There’s a knock on the door and Taylor pops her head into the bathroom. “Heard you turn the water off. Do you need any help with anything?”

“Not right this second,” Karlie replies with a grin, “but you can stay if you want. I might need some help later.”

Taylor takes that as an invitation and enters the bathroom. She runs her eyes wickedly over Karlie’s half-naked body until she catches Karlie’s eyes in the mirror.

“You know, it’s entirely unfair for you to be in here with clothes on if that is how you’re going to look at me,” Karlie remarks, cocking her eyebrow at Taylor. 

Taylor flashes her an innocent smile and walks over to stand behind her. Holding Karlie’s gaze in the mirror, she runs her fingers softly over Karlie’s lower back. Before she lays her chin down on Karlie’s shoulder, she kisses it with soft lips, her arm now wrapped around Karlie’s waist, holding her close.

A little lost in the moment, Karlie startles when Taylor’s voice brings her back to reality. 

“I think your phone rang while you were in the shower,” she says.

“Oh, did it?” Karlie replies, “maybe it’s work-related. I should call them back.” 

She untangles herself from Taylor and heads towards the door to find her phone in the bedroom, Taylor following closely behind her. 

“Where is it?” she asks herself as she stands naked in the bedroom, looking around trying to spot it. 

Taylor giggles in the background. “It’s right here, silly,” she says and points to the dresser by the door.

“Oh,” Karlie replies, “thanks, babe.” She gives Taylor a quick peck on the lips as she picks it up and quickly unlocks it. No missed calls.

“Are you sure it was my phone that rang and not yours?” she asks Taylor.

“It was definitely yours, but I guess it could have been a message…”

Karlie squints at her phone, her thumb working quickly to figure out why there are no notifications about missed calls or messages. Pressing the button for her inbox, the icon turns into a small, smiling cat. “What the…” she whispers as she presses more icons, all of them turning into cats.

She glances up at Taylor suspiciously and finds her shaking from silent laughter. “What the fuck did you do to my phone?” she asks lovingly, not able to keep herself from laughing along with Taylor.

“Oh babe…” Taylor manages to say in between snorts of laughter. “You should check today’s date.”

Karlie immediately glances down at her phone again. “Oh, fucking hell,” she exclaims when she realizes.

“April Fool’s!” Taylor screeches happily, still shaking with laughter.

“You are the worst, I swear,” Karlie yells, but she can’t keep a straight face for long, a grin spreading on her face almost immediately after.

Walking over towards Taylor, she pulls her into a hug. “I love you so much, my mischievous prankster of a girlfriend.”

“I love you too,” Taylor murmurs into Karlie’s ear.

“Seriously though, you’re going to have to fix this. I don’t even know how you did it and it’s awesome but it’s so annoying, so please, turn it back right now.” She breaks the hug and holds her phone out to Taylor, and Taylor laughs.

“Fine,” she says and grabs the phone. Sitting down on the bed, she fixes it in three seconds before she hands it back to Karlie, who's rolling her eyes at her in loving exasperation, trying but failing not to smile.

“Thank you,” Karlie says and gives Taylor a kiss before she walks off to find some clothes.


	24. Chapter 24

It’s the morning of April 14th and Karlie is lying on her side, watching Taylor sleep peacefully next to her. Not wanting to wake her up, she just snuggles closer to her and lets her thoughts wander back to this day exactly two years ago.

They had a lovely evening out in New York, going to dinner together and having a great time before heading back to Taylor’s apartment. Finally alone, only accompanied by the two cats, the two girls settled into Taylor’s large bed to watch TV and cuddle. One thing led to another, as it usually did, until Karlie suddenly pulled away in the middle of a kiss.

“Tay, can we talk?” she said, looking down at her hands, her heart stuck in her throat.

“Sure,” Taylor answered, looking confused. “What about?”

“This,” Karlie said, “us, this thing we’re doing.”

“Oh,” Taylor said and looked away.

“It’s been six weeks, Taylor, and it’s not that I haven’t enjoyed it because I have. I love being around you and I love getting to kiss you, even if it’s only behind closed doors, but… It’s been six weeks. I need to know where this is going.”

“Why am I the one who has to define this?” Taylor asked.

“Because I don’t know where you stand. We’ve been skirting around this for weeks now. It’s obvious to me that you don’t hate kissing me, because if you did we wouldn’t be doing it all the time, but I want you, Taylor, and I need to know if you want me back.”

Taylor didn’t reply for a few minutes, staring at the TV, and an awkward silence that felt like it would never end fell over the bedroom. Finally, she turned towards Karlie again and placed her hand on Karlie’s cheek.

“I want you,” she said softly and smiled.

“So does this mean you’ll be my girlfriend?” Karlie asked slowly, and Taylor answered by putting her lips on Karlie’s, pushing her down on the bed.

“I’m going to need a yes or no answer here, Tay,” Karlie mumbled in between kisses.

Looking at her with loving eyes, Taylor gave her a smile that made Karlie giggle. 

“Yes, Karlie, I will be your girlfriend,” Taylor said and kissed her again.

As Taylor stirs in bed next to her, Karlie smiles at the memory of that night. Happily, she kisses Taylor’s shoulder and Taylor hums in pleasure.

“Good morning, my princess,” Karlie whispers, “and happy anniversary.”

Taylor turns around and faces Karlie now, her sleepy gaze meeting Karlie’s. “Happy anniversary,” she murmurs as she snuggles close to Karlie. “I can’t believe it’s been two whole years. What did I ever do to deserve two years of happiness with you?”

Karlie kisses her lightly on the nose before answering. “You deserve all the happiness in the world,” she coos, “and I plan on having way more than two happy years with you. How does forever sound?”

“Forever sounds perfect,” Taylor murmurs back as she wraps her arms around Karlie. Pushing Karlie over onto her back, she sprawls her slender body on top of Karlie’s, pinning her down while kissing her.

“Ribs, ribs,” Karlie exclaims and takes a shaky, painful breath.

“Fuck,” Taylor mutters under her breath and slides herself off of Karlie immediately. “Sorry, I forgot.”

“It’s okay,” Karlie says once the pain has subsided. “I almost forgot about it myself.” 

“Did I just completely ruin this morning?” Taylor asks but Karlie just chuckles.

“Of course not, silly. This morning is perfect, every morning is perfect with you.”

Taylor leans in to give Karlie another kiss but is interrupted by a cat zooming across the bed.

“Cat-blocked once again,” Karlie laughs as Meredith growls loudly at them from the foot of the bed.

Shaking her head, Taylor rolls her eyes. “I guess we should go feed the children their breakfast.”

“Might be a good idea before we get killed by a certain someone.”

“Hey, she’s not that bad,” Taylor laughs and throws on a robe. “Come on, kitties, time for food.” She opens the door and the cats exit the room immediately, and Taylor follows them down the hallway. She stops for a second and looks back at Karlie, who is still sitting in bed. “Are you coming?”

“I’ll be right there,” Karlie says and stretches. As she watches Taylor and the cats vanish around the corner, she imagines a future where tiny paws and tiny feet run down that hallway together on their way to breakfast. 

***

That evening, Karlie is in the kitchen getting chocolate chip cookies out of the oven. There’s already a big bowl of popcorn standing on the counter alongside a bottle of red wine, ready for Karlie to carry them into the living room where Taylor is getting ready for their long-awaited movie night. 

She leaves the cookies to cool for a few minutes and grabs the popcorn and the wine, making her way into the living room where she finds Taylor sitting on the couch with her favorite guitar lying flat in her lap, the body facing Taylor’s left side instead of her usual right. Taylor is seemingly lost in her own thoughts and shows no signs of noticing Karlie, so Karlie watches her for a while, trying to figure out what exactly Taylor is trying to do here. 

A few sounds emerge from the guitar as Taylor attempts to strum with her injured arm, but after only a few notes, Taylor lets out of frustrated growl and Karlie sees Taylor’s favorite guitar bounce across the couch, making a hollow noise with each bounce.

Karlie puts the popcorn and wine down on the table and sits down next to Taylor. She places her hand on Taylor’s back and strokes her softly. “Hey, what’s wrong?” she asks softly and Taylor sighs.

“I wanted to see if I could manage to play a few chords, but this arm is useless,” she says and waves her left arm in front of Karlie. 

“I know,” Karlie says comfortingly and kisses Taylor’s cheek. “But it’s only a few more days until you’ll get that cast off and then you can play whatever you want again.”

“Yeah, but…” Taylor says, letting her voice trail off as she turns to look sadly into Karlie’s eyes.

Karlie strokes Taylor’s hair and holds her gaze. “But what?”

“But I wanted to surprise you for our anniversary.”

“Surprise me?” Karlie asks suspiciously. “With what?”

Taylor smiles lovingly at Karlie, a hint of redness spreading across her cheeks. “I wanted to play you a song. I wrote it for you for our anniversary.”

Karlie can feel tears pressing behind her eyelids as she embraces Taylor. “You didn’t,” she exclaims happily but Taylor nods, a proud smile on her face.

“I did. But I really wish I could play it for you because it would make this night absolutely perfect.”

“Play it for me next week,” Karlie murmurs as she leans in to place her lips on Taylor’s, kissing her tenderly.

After a short cuddle, Karlie untangles herself from Taylor and stands up. “Did you decide on a movie yet?”

“You know I want to watch Love Actually…”

“We are NOT watching a Christmas movie in April!” Karlie interrupts sternly and Taylor laughs.

“I know, I know,” she says and rolls her eyes lovingly. “So I decided on Titanic. We need some Kate and Leo in our lives.”

“We always need some Kate and Leo in our lives,” Karlie laughs. “I’ll go get the cookies if you get the movie ready.”

She turns and walks back to the kitchen with a big smile on her face. _She wrote me a song_ , she thinks happily to herself as she slides the still warm cookies onto a big plate and walks back into the living room with them. Sitting back down on the couch, Karlie immediately puts her arm around Taylor and pulls her close, settling in for a perfect night with her girlfriend. 

***

“Oh my God, you look amazing,” Cara squeals when she sees Taylor walking up to the table at the restaurant they’re meeting at. 

It’s been six days since their anniversary and the girls have invited some of their friends that are in town to come join them for a celebratory dinner now that Taylor has finally gotten her cast off. 

“She does, doesn’t she?” Karlie murmurs as Cara hugs Taylor, clearly pleased with Taylor’s choice of black jeans, a tightly fitting black turtleneck and a leather jacket. “Hey,” she says as Cara hugs her too.

They make their way around the table, hugging everyone before sitting down next to each other. 

“So how does it feel to finally be back to normal?” Lily asks.

“You have no idea how amazing it to be able to use my arm again,” Taylor says, “but it is so weak right now, it’s actually visibly different from the other one.”

“I can confirm this,” Karlie says and chuckles.

“It will get back to normal soon enough though, I’m sure,“ Annie chimes in and smiles.

“Yeah, it should,” Taylor replies, “I am really looking forward to being able to play guitar again properly, because I’ve really missed it. I was actually going to play Karlie a song for our… you know, last week, but naturally that didn’t work out so well with the cast and all that.”

Just then a waitress walks over to their table with a bottle of wine and some appetizers. 

“We took the liberty of ordering some wine before you got here,” Cara says happily when Karlie stares confusedly at the waitress.

“You guys are the best,” Taylor replies and sends Cara a huge smile.

“So how are you doing, Karlie?” Cara asks, “Are you back to normal too?”

“It was so horrible to hear about your accident,” Annie says before Karlie can answer, “We were absolutely shocked.”

“I’m slowly getting there,” Karlie replies, “I can only move my arm up to about here though without it being painful.” She lifts her arm up and holds it out in a straight line. 

“That doesn’t look too good,” Cara says, “are you back to work yet?” 

“No,” Karlie replies with a sad smile, “I’ve had to cancel on so many shoots these past few weeks. I do have one scheduled for next week though, so I’m hoping I’ll be able to go to that one. I’ll just have to suck it up if it starts getting painful.”

Cara takes Karlie’s hand and squeezes it lightly. “I hope you’ll get back to normal soon.”

“Thanks,” Karlie says and smiles.

“Hey ladies,” a familiar voice says behind Karlie’s back and Gigi plops down into the chair next to her. 

“Hey Gigi,” Karlie says and gives her a hug. “How was Coachella? Or wait, did you already go or are you going this weekend? I can’t remember.”

“I went last weekend,” Gigi laughs, “and it was fun. I guess you’re not going this year?”

“I was supposed to go with Josh and our friends, like we do every year, but then this shitty accident happened and it was just so uncertain if I even could go, so they all went last weekend too. But it's okay, I get to spend time with this one instead.” Karlie nods her head towards Taylor. 

“I’m surprised you’re not crazy tired of each other after all these weeks of doing nothing but healing,” Gigi says and laughs.

“Actually, no, it's the opposite. These past few weeks were physically painful, but they've been the best weeks of my life. I can’t even remember how long it’s been since I spent five weeks in the same city, let alone five weeks in a row with my girlfriend.” Karlie whispers the last word, not wanting the other people at the restaurant to accidentally overhear them.

“You guys are way too cute,” Gigi replies quietly and Karlie smiles.

On the opposite side of the table, Annie and Cara are talking quietly, Cara's arm wrapped around her girlfriend's shoulder while she leans against her, laughing at each other's jokes and generally looking obnoxiously in love. Karlie watches them fondly, a small, dreamy smile on her face as she watches Annie place a soft kiss on Cara's cheek, wishing she could speed up time a few months so she could lean into Taylor and do the same. 

“You really wish you could have that too, don’t you?” Gigi remarks softly, bringing Karlie out of her little trance.

“I do,” she replies with a small sigh and casts a loving glance at Taylor, who is lost in conversation with Lily and Ella. 

“You’ll get there,” Gigi says comfortingly just as the waitress comes back to their table to take their orders.

With dinner on the way, the seven girls at the table go back to their conversation and spend the rest of the night catching up and enjoying each other’s company.


	25. Chapter 25

A few days after their group dinner, Taylor and Karlie are relaxing in the living room when Taylor’s phone rings. Karlie glances up at Taylor as she picks up the phone, but her eyes quickly dart back to her book as Taylor starts talking, not really paying attention to the one-sided conversation coming from the other side of the couch.

She’s halfway through a page when Taylor leans forwards and taps her shoulder to catch her attention. Karlie turns and glances at Taylor questioningly. 

“It’s Tree,” Taylor says, holding her hand in front of the phone to block out the conversation. “Someone put two and two together and published a story about us living together, and now everyone is running with it. Do you mind if I put her on speaker? I think you should hear as well.”

Karlie feels her heart beating just a little bit faster at the thought of the media headlines, and she swallows as she puts a bookmark into her book and puts it down on the table in front of her. “No, go ahead.”

Taylor immediately presses the speaker button on her phone and puts it down on the couch in between her and Karlie. “Alright Tree, you’re on speaker.”

“Hi Karlie,” Tree starts.

“Hey, what’s up?”

“I heard Taylor give you a quick summary, but basically, you have been photographed every time you’ve either left or entered Taylor’s apartment. Considering how you two have been injured and therefore have laid low, it hasn’t really been that many times, but someone has figured out that you’ve been spending these past five weeks at Taylor’s place,” Tree explains, making Karlie sigh.

“I knew someone would catch on eventually,” she mutters and looks over at Taylor. “I should have been more careful, I shouldn’t have stayed here all this time.”

“Hey,” Taylor says softly and grabs Karlie’s hand, “don’t do this. It’s not like I ever told you not to.”

“Look, we can spin this in your favor if you want to,” Tree says, “and that is why I wanted to include you in this conversation, Karlie. I see two possible ways we can deal with this issue.”

“Okay?” Karlie asks, waiting for Tree to tell them.

“The first is obviously to take advantage of the fact that you’ve both been injured. Especially for Taylor’s sake, living alone, it’s only natural to need someone there to keep her company and help her out. The general public who reads magazines and actually pays attention to what the magazines say will know that you have your own room in her apartment…”

“Had,” Karlie interrupts and laughs.

“The public doesn’t know that,” Taylor points out, shaking her head lightly at Karlie.

“And we should keep it that way,” Tree remarks, obviously trying to get the conversation back on track.

“Sorry, Tree,” Karlie says, “you were saying?”

“I was saying that the general public does have access to the information that you have your own room in Taylor’s apartment, and it wouldn’t be that much of a stretch to say that you’re healing together and helping each other out in the process.”

There is a silence after Tree’s words and Karlie studies Taylor’s expression. She looks thoughtful and not entirely on board with the scenario. 

“You said you could think of two options,” Taylor says after a short while. “What’s the second one?”

“The second one is that we don’t release anything at all. You’ve faced these rumors before, Karlie’s rep denied them. Considering what the end goal is here, it might be a good idea to just let them speculate.”

“I’m also going to be away for a few days next week, and May should be busy too, so I guess if we need to have some alone time for the paparazzi’s sake then that’s doable,” Karlie suggests, “but I want to point out that I don’t particularly like that idea.” She smiles at Taylor who takes her hand and squeezes it.

“I think we should just not comment on it for the time being,” Taylor says, “unless you think we should do something else, Tree.”

“I work for you – I will do whatever you want me to do. But I’m not opposed to it.”

“Great,” Taylor replies, “then it’s settled. For the time being we won’t say anything, and then I guess we can reassess in a few weeks?”

“Sounds good to me,” Tree says. “Alright, I’ll let you get back to your afternoon. Bye girls.”

A short but heavy silence spreads around the room as the girls gather their thoughts. 

Karlie is the first to break the silence, turning towards Taylor. “I can’t lie and tell you this has never crossed my mind these past few months,” she starts out with, “because it has. I’ve been spending so much time here, even my mom mentioned how this place is not just yours anymore, it’s ours. But I don’t regret it either.”

“I don’t regret it either,” Taylor says quietly and sighs. “But I guess we should have been more careful.”

“So what are we going to do? Should I leave and stay at mine for a while?”

“No,” Taylor says and pulls Karlie close as she continues talking softly right by Karlie’s ear. “Your mom is right, this is our place now. I don’t want you to feel like you have to go somewhere else for the sake of keeping this a secret. We’re going public anyway so let them talk.”

Karlie leans back a little so she can look Taylor in the eyes, breaking their embrace. “Are you absolutely sure?”

“I am,” Taylor reassures her, her gaze calm and sincere. “I love you, Karlie, and it would absolutely break my heart to have to send you away.”

Karlie pulls Taylor back into the hug. “I love you too,” she whispers into Taylor’s ear. 

***

A week later, Karlie is in Chicago with Gigi, finishing up a shoot that’s been going for several days. It’s early in the morning and they’re both getting their hair and makeup done while they sip their coffees and read the morning news on their phones. 

For the first time since the three-day shoot in New York back in January, Karlie is working with Ana again, and this time Karlie has managed to keep her cool whenever Taylor has come up in conversation, which naturally has been quite often due to the accident. 

“I have a hilarious idea,” Gigi says suddenly as her makeup artist leaves the room, leaving her, Karlie and Ana behind.

“You do?” Karlie asks, still not awake enough to share Gigi’s enthusiasm before she knows what the idea is.

“I do. It’s the last day of the shoot and I think you and I should have some fun.”

“Okay…” Karlie says, “I’m listening.”

“We should send copies of our photos to Zayn and Taylor throughout the day, they will freak out,” Gigi says and laughs, but Karlie just glares at her, sending her a pointed look that Gigi picks up on way too late. 

“Gigi!” Karlie hisses at her friend, her eyes darting towards Ana to catch her reaction before looking at Gigi again.

“Oh…” Gigi whispers as a look of realization spread across her face.

“Taylor, huh?” Ana says amusedly and Karlie swallows. “I thought your boyfriend’s name was Josh, Karlie.”

“It… it is,” Karlie mutters and clears her throat, trying to buy herself some time. “I’m sure that was a Freudian slip from Gigi or something…”

“Oh, I see. So it’s not _the_ Taylor we’re talking about here?” Ana asks and chuckles, clearly noticing Karlie’s nervous reaction.

“God damn you, Gigi,” Karlie mutters under her breath as she realizes that nothing can make Ana think differently now. 

“I guess that rumor I heard was correct after all,” Ana chuckles as she continues to apply makeup to Karlie’s face. “But don’t worry, your secret’s safe with me.”

“You can’t tell anyone, okay? Like, pretend you never heard this or something,” Karlie pleads frantically.

“Karlie, relax,” Ana says soothingly, “I promise I won’t tell anyone. Last time I was just joking around but I realized later that I had hit a nerve. Please, relax your face. Everything will be fine.”

Karlie hums a short reply before she takes a deep breath trying to calm herself down. “Taylor’s going to freak out, alright,” she mumbles after a few seconds, glaring at Gigi again.

“I’m sorry,” Gigi says, clearly feeling bad about having been so careless in the early hours of the morning.

“It’s fine,” Karlie sighs, “you’re lucky it’s just the three of us in here.”

“Yeah… I’ll make sure to watch my mouth from now on,” Gigi mutters, “I mean, yikes! But seriously though, we should totally send them pictures of us. I mean, I’m pretty sure I’ll be getting a warm welcome when I come home tonight…”

“It does sound very tempting,” Karlie says slowly, trying to think about Taylor’s schedule for the day. “I think Tay has an important meeting today though, but I can’t remember what time it is. I guess I’ll think about it, Gigi.” 

“Alright,” Gigi says matter-of-factly, “but I’m definitely doing it. Just so you know, I’m getting laid tonight…”

“Yeah, I don’t doubt that for a second,” Karlie says and laughs, letting Ana finish up her makeup.

***

The next few hours go by quickly for Karlie. As the shoot goes on and she falls into her regular routine, she lets her thoughts wander to the issue of Ana knowing about her and Taylor. She wishes she could know exactly how Taylor would react to it. Had it been several months earlier, Taylor would have freaked out, but now Karlie’s no longer sure. Taylor seems to be more confident out in public now, like she’s not so worried about their little secret being exposed, but it’s still so early, they’re not supposed to be out until August. Either way, she knows she has to tell Taylor about it later when she gets home and it’s making her heartbeat speed up nervously, sending weird jolts through her body. 

She tries to calm herself down and think about other things, but a part of her keeps thinking she should tell Taylor right away on her next break. Deciding she doesn’t want to disturb Taylor’s meeting with something that she will no doubt start worrying about the second she reads it, she takes another deep breath and forces her mind to think about something else.

When her shoulder starts hurting a while later, the photographer grants her a short break and she ends up standing next to the camera, looking through all of the pictures. 

“These are really good,” she says as she flips through them. 

“Reconsidering my hilarious idea?” a familiar voice says behind her and Karlie turns to grin at Gigi.

“I am, actually. She might actually kill me for it, but at least I’ll die laughing.”

“Well, what are you waiting for? Go for it!”

“I kind of need to have some photos to send her,” Karlie remarks, “I can’t just take these ones.” She points to the pictures on the photographer’s screen and laughs.

“Give me your phone and get back out there. I’ll take some for you,” Gigi laughs.

“Alright,” Karlie says and hands Gigi the phone. Turning to the photographer, she lets him know she’s ready to go back out. Rubbing her shoulder lightly and shaking her arm a little, she walks back out in front of the camera. 

***

About an hour later, Karlie is finally finished with her shoot, and one of the other girls takes her spot in front of the camera. She makes her way across the room to where Gigi is standing holding Karlie’s phone.  


“So I kind of sent the pictures as I took them…” she says and laughs, handing the phone to Karlie.

“EIGHT MESSAGES?” Karlie yells shrilly. “Jesus, Gigi, how many photos did you send?”

“I don’t know… like ten maybe?”

“Ten? Oh my God,” Karlie laughs, “I was thinking I could send her like three.” Staring down at her phone she takes a deep breath before she checks the messages.

She scrolls up to the first message and smiles. “You look like you’re killing it on set, as usual.”

The next two messages are just as nice as the first one, but the fourth one is starting to show some pent-up frustration. “You are aware I am at an important meeting today, right? With important people?” Directly following that message is another, written seconds after the first. “People are starting to look at me funny.”

“CAN YOU JUST NOT?”

“OH MY GOD, KARLIE, STOP!”

“YOU BETTER COME STRAIGHT HOME TONIGHT, OR ELSE…”

Karlie shakes with laughter as she reads the last three over and over. She shoves the phone into Gigi’s face, laughing too much to tell her to read them, but Gigi understands and grabs the phone from Karlie. Not long after, the sound of her laughter joins Karlie’s.

“Oh my God,” Gigi manages to say after a while. “I take it someone’s getting laid tonight.”

“I think you might be right,” Karlie replies, trying to catch her breath and stop laughing.

“See? Best idea I ever had.” 

Calm enough to speak normally now, Karlie signals for Gigi to walk with her away from where the shoot is going on. “How did it go on your end?”

“Oh, you won’t be the only one getting lucky tonight,” Gigi says, her eyes sparkling. 

“I bet,” Karlie chuckles just as they reach the door to her dressing room. “Alright, see you after,” she says and waves to Gigi before she ducks into her room to get changed into something more comfortable for the trip home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys!  
> I also have this fic up on Wattpad and one can have fic covers there. I am in desperate need of a beautiful fic cover for this fic but I have honestly 0 photoshop skills, so are there anyone out there who would want to help out a fic writer with no visual art skills? You can either just comment here or send me a message on my [tumblr](http://lovesbitch.tumblr.com).


	26. Chapter 26

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys,  
> Sorry I didn't update last week, I had a really rough and long week and my brain was just completely empty.  
> Made it up to you by writing a 4300 words long chapter, so I hope you'll enjoy it!

When Karlie walks through the door later that night, she is surprised that Taylor doesn't come out to say hi to her. In fact, not a single soul greets her, the apartment being as silent as if no one was there, so she leaves her suitcase in the hallway to go find out where both Taylor and the cats are hiding. After having walked through almost every single room, finding Olivia grooming herself in the kitchen and Meredith sleeping on top of the coffee table in the living room, she finally finds Taylor on the sofa in the library, reading a book in the dim evening light. 

As Karlie walks in, Taylor looks up from her book for a second before going back to it, leaving Karlie standing in the doorway feeling very confused. Wasn’t Taylor the one who wanted her to come straight home?  


Walking over to Taylor, she sits down on her lap, cupping Taylor’s face in her hands.

“I hope you’re here to finish what you started,” Taylor mutters as she closes her book. “Because if not, I’d rather continue reading this. It’s very good.” Her entire demeanor feigns an indifference that confuses Karlie, but when Taylor’s eyes find Karlie’s, the mischief that is twinkling in them gives her away, making Karlie giggle.

Rolling her eyes gently, Karlie closes the gap between them and kisses Taylor, a long, soft kiss that she never wants to end. 

“I’ve missed you,” she breathes, the words barely audible but Taylor murmurs softly in reply before their lips meet again, crashing into each other with urgency now. 

Karlie’s hands trail down Taylor’s sides as they kiss, finding their way underneath Taylor’s shirt and lifting it up, exposing her chest before the entire thing comes off, leaving Taylor sitting there in her bra. When Taylor makes no move to unbutton Karlie’s shirt, Karlie does it herself while staring questioningly at Taylor.

“You teased me all day long so you’re going to have to work for it today,” Taylor just says with a shrug, a sly smile spreading across her face.

“I suppose that’s fair,” Karlie replies with a giggle as she stands up for a second to pull off Taylor’s black skirt, all the while Taylor is looking at her amusedly. She sits back down on Taylor’s lap and kisses her as she pushes her down sideways. Then she repositions herself so Taylor can lie flat on her back. 

Taylor does her best to remain indifferent, but as Karlie’s lips travel down her jawline, Karlie notices Taylor isn’t far away from cracking. Continuing her kisses onwards down her neck and chest, Karlie notices Taylor starting to quiver, subtly at first but increasing quickly. 

Just as Karlie’s moves her lips to focus on Taylor’s breasts, her hand softly caressing the outside of her right thigh at the same time, Taylor can’t take it anymore. She puts her hand on Karlie’s good shoulder and pushes her roughly downwards. “Skip the foreplay,” she orders and Karlie giggles sweetly in reply as she runs her nose from Taylor’s belly button down to the hem of her panties. She quickly slides them off her and runs her fingers softly down the insides of Taylor’s thighs. 

Soon enough Taylor is squirming underneath her, her knees pressing up against the sides of Karlie’s face as her soft whimpers turn into deep, guttural moans of sounds resembling Karlie’s name. 

“You are magical, woman,” Taylor murmurs huskily once Karlie finally lets her go, a thin layer of sweat covering her entire body.

Karlie beams at the compliment. Nothing makes her happier than knowing just how much pleasure she can give her girlfriend and she plops down next to Taylor, wearing a huge grin.

“I hope that was worth the wait,” she murmurs back and nuzzles the side of Taylor’s neck lovingly.

“It was,” Taylor replies as she rolls over on her side, facing Karlie. Her fingers dance playfully on Karlie’s stomach, sending a small shiver up Karlie’s back. While she places sweet kisses on Karlie’s chest, her hand slips into Karlie’s pants, teasing her slowly but gently.

Karlie can feel her heartbeat speeding up as jolts of pleasure run through her body and she closes her eyes, biting down on her bottom lip as she focuses on the pleasure. 

Taylor spends a long time on Karlie’s chest while her fingers get Karlie on edge. Just as Karlie starts whimpering, Taylor rolls over, placing her entire body on top of Karlie’s for a few moments before she rolls off of her and removes her hand from Karlie’s pants.

Karlie opens her eyes immediately, feeling flustered and confused. “What?” she asks in bewilderment and catches Taylor’s amused gaze. 

“Now you know how I felt earlier,” Taylor says wickedly. With a smile she picks up her book and turns on her heel to walk out of the room, leaving a breathless Karlie behind on the sofa.

***

45 minutes later, Karlie is wrapped in a towel in the bathroom, having just gotten out of a long shower where the warm water and some help from the showerhead had washed her frustration away.

There’s a subtle knock on the door and Taylor enters seconds later. “I hope you’re hungry,” she says gently as she walks over to Karlie, “dinner’s ready.” She caresses Karlie’s cheek softly and gives her a soft kiss. “I’m sorry about earlier,” she says, “but you deserved that.”

“I guess I did deserve that,” Karlie admits with a smirk and pulls Taylor in for another quick kiss. 

“I have to get back to the food,” Taylor says, “so get dressed and get your cute butt downstairs, I’m starving.” She flashes Karlie a smile as she turns and walks away.

Karlie dries herself off quickly and pulls on a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt. Right before she opens the door she glances at her reflection in the mirror, stalling for a moment. She knows this is when she will have to tell Taylor about Ana knowing about them and she’s not looking forward to it, but she knows she can't wait any longer. Taking a deep breath, she opens the door and heads towards the kitchen.

In the kitchen, Taylor is just about ready to sit down, placing an oven dish full of baked vegetables on the table just as Karlie walks in. 

“This smells delicious,” Karlie says as she takes her place at the table.

“Thank you,” Taylor says as she scoops food onto Karlie’s plate. “It really does, doesn’t it?” 

They eat in silence for a few minutes, savoring the delicious food, until Taylor breaks the silence.

“So, how was it being back at work?” she asks in between mouthfuls of potato and eggplant. “Did you do okay with your shoulder and everything?”

“You know, it was fun! It hurt a little once we’d been at it for a while, but it was definitely worth it. Nothing that I needed to take painkillers for though, it was just a dull ache that went away once I rested a bit.”

“That’s good,” Taylor says with a smile, “I’m so happy you’re finally back to normal again. I know you’ve missed going to work.”

“Yeah, it was really nice being back. But, there’s something I have to tell you and I would have told you straight away but we got kind of… preoccupied.”

“Okay?” Taylor looks at her quizzically and Karlie can feel herself becoming more and more nervous. 

Before she starts talking, she takes a deep breath, trying to shake her nerves. “Alright, so, you remember back in January when my makeup artist Ana was asking all these questions about you and I and Adam, and I kind of had a freakout about it?”

“I do.”

“She was my makeup artist this time too.”

“And how did that go?”

“It actually went really well. She didn’t mention you except for a few questions about our accident, but then this morning she was doing my makeup and Gigi was there as well, and Gigi kind of came up with that whole ‘send half-naked photos to our partners’ idea, except she kind of mentioned you specifically by name.” Karlie drags out the last three words of the sentence, paying close attention to Taylor’s reaction. Taylor’s eyes have widened and her fork is hanging frozen mid-air, a piece of carrot waiting to be eaten.

“I’m sorry, she what?” Taylor asks after a few seconds of stunned silence.

“It was an honest slip-up, Tay,” Karlie says softly. “Thankfully her own makeup artist had just left the room, so it was really only Ana who heard. I tried to deny it but there was no way I was going to convince her. She already had an inkling anyway, or so she told me at least.”

“How?” Taylor asks, her voice an octave higher than usual. 

“From last time,” Karlie says, intentionally keeping her voice calm. She knows Taylor is freaking out internally and Karlie is hoping that by staying calm and collected, it will be easier to calm Taylor down too. “She told me she kind of put two and two together back in January after her questions had made me so tense. She wasn’t going to bring it up herself though.”

Taylor nods slowly and finally eats the now cold piece of carrot. Karlie waits for her to say something but there’s only silence for a few seconds. Her green eyes study Taylor carefully. The tension in her face is noticeable to Karlie; the way her brow furrows just a little bit and her eyes are more narrow than usual. Looking at her, it’s almost like Karlie can hear Taylor’s mind working on a plan for how to deal with this, but to Karlie the issue is already dealt with. She puts her hand on top of Taylor’s where it lies on the table and lets her fingers run softly across it before grabbing hold. 

“Hey…” she says quietly and gazes at Taylor, Taylor’s blue eyes finally meeting hers. “It’s going to be okay. You don’t have to do anything, it’s a non-issue.”

“How is it a non-issue when your makeup artist knows because Gigi couldn’t keep her mouth shut?” Taylor replies icily. “What if she decides to tell all of her friends? What if Gigi suddenly decides to tell a few other people while she’s at it?” She pulls her hand away from Karlie’s grasp and puts it in her lap instead.

“You have to relax,” Karlie says, “first of all, Gigi won’t say anything to anyone. She was horrified when she realized what she had done and she apologized. People make mistakes sometimes and you know that. Second, Ana gave me her promise that she wouldn’t say anything.”

“Promises don’t mean anything in the long run,” Taylor growls.

“Taylor, you don’t mean that,” Karlie says and sighs. “Look, I’ve gotten to know her a bit better this week and she’s a sweetheart. She won’t tell the world about us because she’s actually a decent person, not to mention the fact she is contractually obligated to keep quiet about whatever she hears and overhears on set. So please, relax.”

Taylor’s shoulders drop a little as she is reminded that Ana is legally bound to keep their secret, but the frown stays on her face. “When did this even happen?” she asks, her voice calmer than before.

“I told you it was this morning.”

“It’s almost eight at night. Why didn’t you tell me about it sooner?”

“I was going to call you right away when it happened, but I only had a few minutes to spare and I knew I wouldn’t be able to explain everything to you before I had to go to my shoot, so I decided to just wait. I couldn’t remember when you were supposed to go to your meeting either and I just know you would have been in a terrible mood all day if I had told you straight away. And then of course we were a little preoccupied when I got home so it had to wait until now.”

“I suppose that’s fair,” Taylor mumbles and looks away for a second. “I will still have to say something to Gigi though.”

“I know,” Karlie says, “but don’t be too hard on her, please. She really didn’t mean to.”

Taylor only nods at that and shifts her focus back to her plate for a while, leaving the kitchen silent save for the sounds of cutlery hitting plates every now and then.

“I have to say I find it funny that you couldn’t call me about that because you knew I had a meeting, but you _could_ send me half-naked pictures of you…” Taylor says with a smirk, breaking the silence.

“Yeah, about that…” Karlie laughs and suddenly their conversation has shifted back to normal, the sound of laughter filling the kitchen once again.

***

It’s the evening of May 2nd and Karlie is sitting at a table next to Josh at the Met Gala, engaged in conversation with Robbie Myers, editor-in-chief of Elle, and her husband, who are sitting next to them. In between mouthfuls of food and cheerful chatter, Karlie exchanges longing looks with Taylor, who is sitting two tables away from them. The two of them have been eye-flirting not-so-subtly all evening and Karlie has had to be brought back to the conversation several times by Josh gently tapping her knee with his hand. 

“Sorry,” Karlie mutters after having yet again been called back to the conversation.

Robbie luckily isn't offended by Karlie's wandering attention and laughs next to her, an honest, throaty laughter. “You’re very preoccupied tonight, Karlie. Any particular reason?” She looks around, trying to figure out what or who has had Karlie so distracted all night. 

Karlie can feel herself getting nervous when a knowing smile crosses Robbie’s face moments later. _Fuck_ , she thinks and braces herself for a question that never comes as Robbie politely doesn’t point out the obvious. “It’s just been a long day,” Karlie says and smiles, her gaze sending the woman a ‘thank you for not saying anything’. Robbie just winks at her and takes a sip of her drink.

“So, how is college going for you? I bet you must be super excited about the theme of the gala this year, you being so into technology.”

“Yeah, the theme is amazing,” Karlie says enthusiastically, her eyes lighting up immediately. “It’s like a dream come true, my two worlds colliding. I absolutely love it. As for NYU, it’s going really well, thank you!”

“Are you enjoying it?”

“I really am. I mean, it’s a lot of work and it’s sometimes difficult to fit everything in, schedule-wise, but I make it work, even if that means doing homework on planes or after a long day on set. There’s such a huge potential for women to get involved in the world of technology and create amazing things, and it's something I definitely see myself doing in the future, so yeah, I'm really excited to be learning more about it all.”

“That’s wonderful. I’m really glad you’ve found something to be so passionate about. Not everyone gets to do that, you know.”

“Yeah, I know,” Karlie says and grins.

After a short while, Robbie asks Josh about his company, creating a moment for Karlie to glance over at Taylor, only to find out she’s not in her seat anymore. She glances around but she can’t find her anywhere.

When a voice starts talking a few moments later, she understands why.

“As you all know, every year we have a musical guest, for a special performance. You also know that we have an amazingly talented woman in our midst tonight, who can paint pictures with her words like no other. Please give it up for tonight's beautiful co-chair, Taylor Swift!”

Karlie spends the next twenty minutes watching her girlfriend intently. She mouths along to the lyrics of Clean, Wildest Dreams, Blank Space and Shake It Off, not caring if anyone sees her do it. 

“So when I was sitting at home with my two cats, trying to figure out what songs to play for you guys, I came to the realization that I should take you back to the beginning. I am well aware that you might all be completely sick of this song by now, but I changed it up a little so I figured why not, you know? This song is called Love Story.”

When Taylor says the title out loud, her gaze meets Karlie’s and Karlie can feel tears pressing on her eyelids. She knows Taylor chose this song for her and she can’t keep the smile off her face.

Mid-song, Josh leans close to her and grabs her hand for a second to get her attention. She turns towards him, reluctantly dragging her heart-eyes away from Taylor in order to hear what he has to say. 

“Sorry,” he whispers cheekily at her quizzical gaze, “but I had to say this when no one else could listen in. I sort of met someone…”

“You did what?” Karlie replies, her eyes wide with interest.

“Yeah yeah, I’ll give you the details later. What are you guys doing after? I kind of need to talk to you about this.”

“Taylor’s hosting an after-party. You can come though if you’d like and you can tell me then?”

“Sure, sounds good,” Josh replies with a smile before he nods his head towards Taylor. “You can pay attention to your girl again now.”

Karlie smiles at him before turning back towards Taylor, throwing an arm across his shoulders and giving him a sideways hug. “You’re a good guy, Josh,” she tells him quietly, still focusing her gaze on Taylor. “I hope you’ll get this girl.”

***

Hours later, Taylor, Karlie and Josh are sitting by themselves in Taylor’s study, blocking out the noise of the party that’s coming from the rest of the apartment. After Karlie quickly caught Taylor up on the situation, telling her Josh needed to come to the party because they needed to talk about this girl he'd met, Taylor quickly briefed Tree, who is now sitting in the kitchen, waiting for Taylor to come get her. 

“So what’s her name?” Karlie asks interestedly, feeling genuinely happy for Josh.

He looks away shyly and a faint blush is visible on his cheeks. “Funnily enough her name is Carla.”

“Oh wow!” Karlie exclaims, “What are the odds of that?”

“Yeah… I’m hoping it will somehow make it easier for my parents to get used to her instead of you. At least the name won’t be much of an issue, it’s everything else that might be a problem.” He chuckles nervously and runs his hand through his hair, ruffling it a little.

“Tell us more about her,” Karlie says. “Where did you meet her? What's she like?”

“She’s wonderful,” Josh says slowly and Karlie recognizes the look in his eyes. It’s the same one she always gets when she looks at Taylor. “She’s a successful real estate agent up in White Plains, but she’s originally from a small town in Iowa. I guess we're sort of similar, she's an introvert like me but she’s really funny. We can talk for hours on end... Do you remember Steve?” 

“Steve…” Karlie chews on the name for a few seconds. “Short guy, dirty blonde hair, big football fan Steve?” 

“That’s the one. They’re related. She’s his second cousin twice removed or something like that, and she was staying over at his apartment one night because it was easier for her to sleep in his guest room after a concert than to drive all the way home, and he happened to ask if I could come over and help him out with something earlier in the day, and so I met her then and we kind of hit it off right away. She didn’t know who I was, which was unusual but actually really nice.”

“Have you guys… you know, done anything yet?” Taylor asks suddenly and Karlie notices Josh mulls over the question for a while before he answers.

“No, not really,” he finally says, “I mean, I guess we’ve been texting a lot and we enjoy each other’s company, but we haven’t gone on a real date or kissed if that’s what you mean.”

“Good,” Taylor says and nods her head slightly.

Karlie turns towards her and looks at her questioningly. “Good? How is that good?” 

“It’s good because it means I haven’t done anything to compromise your secret,” Josh answers for her and Taylor nods approvingly. 

“See, he gets it,” she says triumphantly to Karlie, who just shakes her head a little.

“I guess that’s true.”

“I want to ask her out though,” Josh continues, “and that’s why I needed to speak to you. I need to know what I can do in this situation.”

“Can I bring Tree in now?” Taylor asks. “I want her to help us decide how we can solve this for you.”

“Yeah, of course. Go ahead.” 

As Taylor slips out the door to find Tree, Karlie gets up from her seat and moves to sit next to Josh. “I’m so happy for you,” she says quietly before she gives him a hug, and they embrace for a while, breaking apart just as Taylor and Tree walk into the room, closing the door carefully behind them. 

Karlie moves back to sit next to Taylor again as Tree pulls up a chair. 

“Taylor just informed me why I’m here,” Tree says as she sits down, “and I think for now I’ll let you guys discuss and just listen to your ideas. I’m here to work with whatever you guys want to do, but I’ll give you my opinion before you make your final decision.”

“That sounds reasonable,” Josh says, “thank you. I’m not really sure where to start, here…”

“I think before I say what I think you should do, I want to know what you're thinking,” Taylor says calmly, giving Josh the opportunity to try to put his thoughts into words.

“I’m not really sure what I should do, to be honest with you,” he says, “I’m single in private but I’m in a relationship in public, which frankly is an odd situation to find yourself in, even if you're completely okay with it.” He looks reassuringly over at Karlie, who feels a little guilty for putting him in this position in the first place. “But I guess I could tell her we broke up?” 

“I don’t think that’s such a good idea,” Taylor says.

“Why not?”

“If you want a potential relationship with her to have a future, it’s a bad move to start it off with a lie. When Karlie and I go public, obviously the public will know that your” she points to both of them, “relationship wasn’t real. How can you break up with someone if it wasn’t real? I mean, I wouldn’t look at you twice if that happened, I’d dump you right there.”

A pained look flashes across Josh’s face, but he nods silently, agreeing with her. “I see your point. But what do I do then? I can’t just tell her the truth, it’ll out you both.”

“Not necessarily,” Karlie says slowly, her brain still trying to work out what it is she intends to say. “Telling her that Taylor and I are in a relationship isn’t actually necessary.”

“Exactly,” Taylor chimes in, “you can gloss over that part, leave out my name. Obviously she will find out at some point, but that doesn’t have to be now. You need to be brutally honest with her though. Tell her everything else.”

“You might want to warn her about what might end up happening when they do go public,” Tree mentions, “because your name will come up in the media, a lot.”

“…you’re kind of making it sound like it’s not really worth the effort.” Josh sighs and rests his face in his hands, rubbing his eyes.

“I’m sorry,” Karlie gently tells him, “this whole thing isn’t fair to you. It never was.”

“Oh, I chose to do this, you know that. You have nothing to be sorry for.” He sends a worn smile her way and she returns it lovingly.

“It’s going to be difficult,” Taylor says, “but it sounds like you really like her and so I think she might be worth it. You should go for it, Josh. Have your chance at happiness. If she’s interested too, she’ll probably understand.” 

“Would you, if you were her?”

“I think so…” she says, a little hesitantly, “but I guess it depends on the explanation you give her. Honesty is always the best policy though, and if she can’t handle that then she’s not the one for you.” She smiles a reassuring smile, and Karlie can her heart soar with the love she feels for Taylor as she listens to their conversation.

“I’d be happy to help you figure out what to tell her,” Tree says, “at least in the sense of how much you can say.”

“That would be great, thanks.”

“I guess we’ve reached a conclusion then?” Tree asks and stifles a yawn.

“We have,” Taylor agrees. “Go on, head on home. I’ll give him your number and you can talk about it in the morning.”

“Will you stay for a while?” Karlie asks Josh, hoping the answer is yes. She hasn’t seen much of him lately and she feels bad about it.

“Yeah, for a little while,” he replies with a small smile. He looks a little worn down so Karlie wraps her arms around him in a comforting hug.

“It’ll be alright,” she whispers into his ear. “I’m sure she’ll understand and that she’ll want to give it a go. You deserve to be happy.”


	27. Chapter 27

Two months later, in late June, Karlie is walking through the lobby in her Paris hotel, exhausted after a long day. As she steps into the elevator and waits for it to take her to her floor, her mind wanders to Taylor and the long phone call that’s waiting. She hasn’t seen her girlfriend in three weeks now, having travelled between Paris, Rome, Milan and London for various photo shoots with no time in between shoots to fly back to New York, and there is nothing she wants more than to sink back into the soft mattress of her bed and facetime Taylor, telling her everything about her day.

She walks through the door to her hotel suite and throws her bag onto the closest chair. Suddenly a whiff of tropical-scented body wash hits her and she freezes. It’s been hours since she showered; why can she smell her body wash? 

Glancing around, she notices the bathroom door is ajar and she slowly makes her way over to it, pushing it open.

“SURPRISE!” A bleached-blonde head pops out at her, causing Karlie to jump, screaming shrilly for a few seconds until her brain catches up.

“Oh my GOD, you bleached your hair!” she squeals and crashes into Taylor, wrapping her arms around her and holding her tight. “And you’re here!” She can feel tears form in her eyes as she presses soft kisses all over Taylor’s face.

“Oh baby, don’t cry,” Taylor coos and dries Karlie’s tears away with her thumbs.

“I’m just so happy to see you,” Karlie says, “and it’s been such a long day and all I wanted was to come back here and facetime you and oh my God, you’re actually here.” 

She breaks their embrace and takes a step back. “I can’t believe you bleached your hair!”

“Do you like it?” Taylor grins and uses her hand to fluff her hair a little bit, showing it off.

“I love it,” Karlie replies, “you look amazing.” She runs her gaze all over Taylor, smiling happily.

“Now you’re making me blush,” Taylor murmurs embarrassedly after a couple of seconds.

“Sorry,” Karlie says as she takes Taylor’s hand and leads her out of the bathroom and into the bedroom. “All I want to do right now is lie here, on the bed, in your arms and listen to you telling me why exactly you are here and not at home.”

“I kind of had something else in mind for that bed…” Taylor points out, a wicked smile on her face, but Karlie just laughs and shakes her head.

“I’m so tired right now, so please? Please?” She looks at Taylor with puppy-dog eyes and sticks her bottom lip out in a small pout, causing Taylor to cave immediately, kicking off her shoes and crawling into bed.

“Come here, you,” she says and Karlie doesn't waste any time sprawling her long body out on the bed next to Taylor’s. Taylor wraps her arms around her and pulls her in, pressing kisses to Karlie’s forehead.

“I can’t believe you’re here,” Karlie murmurs softly.

“I know,” Taylor says, “and you can thank Selena for that. She was getting tired of listening to me talk about how much I missed you and she had kind of run out of places to take me to keep me entertained.”

“I just realized we are disgustingly codependent,” Karlie remarks and scrunches her nose, making Taylor laugh.

“Yeah, I think you’re stuck with me forever, babe.”

“No complaints here,” Karlie says, a huge smile on her face. “How did you get into my room?”

“Oh, I called Penni.”

“When?”

“Yesterday.”

“So you have both been keeping secrets from me. Interesting…”

“It wouldn’t have been a surprise if I told you,” Taylor points out, kissing Karlie’s forehead again.

Karlie can feel her eyelids getting heavy as she murmurs a reply to Taylor. Lying in Taylor’s arms feels safe, like she’s finally home again, and she feels her body relax under Taylor’s soft touch.

“Karlie?” Taylor asks after a while.

“Mmm?” Karlie hums in reply, feeling too sleepy to find actual words.

“Are you falling asleep?”

“Mmm…”

“It’s okay,” Taylor says, her voice barely more than a whisper. 

She snuggles closer to Karlie and strokes her hair softly, brushing her lips softly across Karlie’s skin a few times, and soon enough Karlie drifts away into a deep sleep.

***

When Karlie wakes up the next morning, her entire world is shaking. 

“Karlie,” a voice says and her world shakes again.

Opening her eyes slowly, she realizes that the shaking is just Taylor trying to wake her up and it brings a smile to her face. “Mmmm,” she murmurs and rolls around onto her back, her eyes slipping shut again.

“Karlie!” Taylor says, more insistent now. When Karlie still refuses to wake up properly, Taylor crawls on top of her and starts peppering her face with kisses.

“God, you’re an elephant,” Karlie groans, but she finally open her eyes and meets Taylor’s gaze lovingly.

“Lies,” Taylor says, her eyes sparkling as she giggles in between kisses.

“Okay, you’re more like a gazelle then,” Karlie says and winks at her girlfriend. She wraps her arms around Taylor and rolls over again, pinning Taylor underneath her as she kisses her softly.

“As much as I’d love to do this now, we don’t have time,” Taylor murmurs, causing Karlie to pause.

“Why? It’s my day off.”

“I know,” Taylor says, a smug smile on her face. “But you have about thirty minutes to get ready for Disneyland.”

“You didn’t.”

“I did,” Taylor replies happily. “You know I can’t resist taking my girlfriend to Disneyland, so what are you waiting for? Go shower!”

Karlie lets out a happy little squeal and gives Taylor another kiss before she hurries out of bed and into the bathroom.

“I’ll get you some coffee,” she hears Taylor yell after her and she closes the bathroom door with a smile. 

***

“I really hope you’re ready for this,” Karlie chuckles lightly as she stares out the window of the black SUV that has stopped as close to the Disneyland entrance as possible. A sea of people is rushing by them, making their way towards the gates. Some stop and glance curiously at the SUV, but most of them don’t pay them any attention.

“For some reason I feel like it'll be easier to walk around Disneyland Paris than it is back home, but I guess we’ll find out. Oh, here comes Jeff.”

“Miss Swift, miss Kloss,” he says in his deep voice as he opens the door on Taylor’s side of the car. “There is a young lady waiting for you by the gates. Her name is Jacqueline and she will be your personal Disney guide for the day. Are you ready to go?”

“We are,” Taylor replies and grins at Jeff before turning to Karlie. “Let’s do this.”

They meet up with Jacqueline, a petite dark-haired girl, a few minutes later. She blushes at the sight of them but greets them with a strong, steady voice.

“Welcome,” she says and smiles a smile that seems to engulf her entire face. 

“Hi,” Taylor and Karlie say in unison before they break out in a fit of giggles.

“Sorry about that,” Taylor says after a few seconds. “We don’t usually do that.”

“Oh, that is absolutely fine,” Jacqueline says, a slight accent coloring her words. “Have either of you been here before?” 

“Not to the Paris one, no,” Taylor says.

“No problem, I will take good care of you and show you everything you want to see. The Disney Magic Parade is happening in a few hours, and tonight, right before closing, we have our nighttime show, Disney Dreams. Will you be staying with us until closing?”

Taylor looks expectantly at Karlie, and Karlie grins. “Yes, we’ll stay.”

“Excellent!” Jacqueline exclaims. “Should I put in a dinner reservation for you?”

“That would be great, yeah.”

“Wonderful. If you like French cuisine, I would recommend Auberge de Centrillon. It is located in Fantasyland and it is absolutely beautiful.”

“I read about that place yesterday,” Taylor says and looks at Karlie. “It’s supposed to be really nice. Do you want to try it?”

“Definitely!”

“I will arrange that for you, then,” Jacqueline smiles. “Now, is there anything in particular you’d like to do today or should we just walk around and see a little bit of everything?”

“I really want to take Karlie on a few rollercoasters,” Taylor says cheekily and looks at Karlie, who gulps. 

“I hate you,” Karlie mouths, and Taylor laughs. 

“She’s not a huge fan of them, but I’m adamantly trying to convert her,” Taylor tells Jacqueline with a wicked grin. 

“Alright! I suggest we start with Space Mountain, and then we can walk around for a while after that if you’d like?”

“Lead the way,” Taylor says. As Jacqueline turns around and starts guiding them through the masses of people, Taylor leans in close to Karlie for a second. “She has the cutest accent, I just want to squeeze her,” she whispers excitedly into Karlie’s ear.

“As long as you don’t leave me for her,” Karlie jokingly whispers back and Taylor rolls her eyes lovingly at her.

“Never,” she whispers back.

***

“Wasn’t that fun?” Taylor asks Karlie the second they get off of Space Mountain.

“Sure…” Karlie manages to say, her entire body feeling shaky. Her hands are a little clammy and she quickly rubs them on her jeans to dry them. “Can we not go on another one right away?”

“Of course,” Taylor says. “Want to get pictures by the castle?”

“That sounds nice and not-terrifying, so yes. Please.” She lets out a sigh of relief. 

As they walk back towards the castle, Taylor suddenly takes Karlie’s hand. Their fingers interlock softly, but firmly, and Karlie turns her head, a surprised smile lighting up her face. Taylor smiles back at her.

“It’s time,” she whispers and Karlie nods slightly, her heart fluttering in her chest.

Jacqueline looks at them inquisitively, her smile growing wider at the sight of their interlocked hands. 

“So, how long have you worked here?” Karlie asks her, wanting to connect with the girl showing them around. 

“A couple of years. I started when I was 18, but I only work here during the summer. The rest of the year I go to university in a different city.”

“Oh, that sounds lovely,” Karlie replies. “What are you studying?”

“Marketing,” Jacqueline says, “I only have one year left.”

“That’s great,” Taylor says, “I never went to college, obviously, but I think if I did I would have studied marketing or advertising or something like that. Do you enjoy it?”

While Jacqueline answers, Karlie notices a little girl sitting alone on a bench. She looks around as they walk past, trying to see if anyone is with her, but she can’t see anyone that looks like they belong to the girl and she halts.

“What’s wrong?” Taylor asks her quietly.

“There’s a little kid over there on that bench and it looks like she’s completely alone. I think we should go make sure she's okay.”

She lets go of Taylor’s hand and walks over to the little girl, crouching down in front of her.

“Hey,” she says softly, her green eyes looking up at the little girl warmly.

“Hi,” the girl whispers shyly, the word barely audible.

“What’s your name?”

“Charlotte…”

“Hi Charlotte, I’m Karlie. I saw you sitting over here by yourself. Did you come here with anyone?”

“Yeah…” Charlotte answers quietly. “Evie and I were just playing and then suddenly I couldn’t see her no more.”

“Who is Evie?”

“She’s my big sister. She’s nine.”

“Did you come with your mommy and daddy as well?”

“Yeah but I couldn’t find them.”

Karlie stands up to sit down next to Charlotte on the bench. Taylor, Jacqueline, and both of Taylor’s security guards stand next to them, waiting patiently. 

“I’ll call this in,” Jacqueline says to Karlie, “someone is probably looking for her.”

“Good,” Karlie says and turns back to Charlotte again. “That’s a very lovely dress you’re wearing. Are you a princess?”

“Yes! But Evie says I’m not a real one…”

“Don’t listen to her,” Karlie says and winks at her. “See that girl standing right over there?” She points at Taylor and Charlotte nods, her blue eyes wide. “I call her a princess all the time.”

Charlotte looks up at Karlie and scrunches her nose. “Is she a princess?”

“I think she is,” Karlie says with a smile. “Hey, did you know there are actual princesses in a castle here?”

“There are?” 

The look of pure joy on Charlotte’s face makes Karlie’s insides gooey and she suddenly feels a faint ache inside, an image of her and Taylor’s future children flashing in her mind as her eyes well up with emotion, and she blinks. “There are,” she says. “Do you want to go see them while we wait for your mommy and daddy and Evie?”

“Yes!” Charlotte exclaims and jumps down from the bench.

Karlie looks at Taylor, who is staring at her with wonder in her eyes. 

“You’re incredible,” Taylor says softly and it takes all of Karlie’s willpower to not reply with a kiss. 

“Is it okay if we take her to see the princesses?” Karlie asks Jacqueline.

“Yeah, I’ll call in again and let them know where we are. We should probably stay there though, so her parents know where to find her.”

“That should be fine. I’m sure she won’t want to leave anyway,” Karlie chuckles and takes Charlotte’s hand. “Are you ready?”

Charlotte nods eagerly as she skips on the spot, clearly excited to go. Karlie reaches out with her free hand and finds Taylor’s.

“Do you think this will be us one day?” she whispers softly into Taylor’s ear, only loud enough for Taylor to hear it. Taylor blushes faintly and she nods, her teeth biting down on her lower lip as she smiles, trying to not give herself away to the entire park.

“I think so too,” Karlie murmurs before she lets Jacqueline lead the way to the princesses.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There are some very important chapters coming up soon, and because they are so important, I might end up spending a little bit more time than usual on each chapter. I want to do them justice and time keeps running away from me so posting once a week is proving to be difficult at the moment. But I'll try to stick to it as much as I can, and if I happen to not post one week, know the next chapter is right around the corner. :)


	28. Chapter 28

After having occupied the princesses for a good twenty minutes, the girls take an ecstatic Charlotte outside with them to find somewhere to sit down. 

“Karlie,” Charlotte says happily and shakes Karlie’s hand, “can Elsa come with me home?”

The hopeful look on Charlotte’s face makes Karlie laugh. “Oh, you know what? I think she would love to do that, but I don’t think she can.”

“Why not?” Charlotte asks and sticks her lip out in a pout. 

“Because there is already a princess Elsa in your house.” Karlie boops Charlotte’s nose lightly and smiles at the girl, who returns it with a toothy grin. 

Just then, a woman comes running up towards them. “Charlotte!!”

Charlotte turns and her eyes widen as she recognizes her mother.

“Mommy!” she yells and runs over to her, engulfing her in a hug. Her mother starts whispering things into Charlotte’s ear while peppering her with kisses.

“Thank you so much for watching out for her,” Charlotte’s mother says, glancing up at Karlie in between the multitude of kisses she’s putting onto her daughter’s face. “I can’t believe we almost lost her at Disneyland and OH my GOD, you’re Taylor Swift.” Her eyes finally flick to Taylor’s face, causing her to stand up straight. Her blue eyes are wide with shock, as if it were a ghost standing in front of her.

Taylor chuckles nervously where she stands, but smiles at the woman. 

While her mother stands there quietly, just staring at Taylor, Charlotte darts back over to Karlie and takes Karlie’s hand. “Mommy, can Karlie come with us?” she asks, bringing her mother out of her trance.

“Oh, I’m sure Karlie and Taylor have better things to do with their day,” she answers before looking back up at Karlie. “Sorry, I hope she hasn’t been too annoying. I’m Alaina, by the way,” she says and reaches out a hand to shake hands with both Karlie and Taylor.

“Nice to meet you,” Karlie says, “And she’s been wonderful, really.”

“I’m glad to hear that,” Alaina says. “Wow, I can’t believe _the_ Taylor Swift took care of my daughter,” she says after a few seconds.

“You know, we don’t actually have anything in particular planned for today, so if you’d like to, we would love to hang out for a bit,” Taylor offers. 

“Are you serious? I don’t want to intrude or anything.”

“Absolutely!”

“Okay,” Alaina says, “I hope you won’t mind being stuck on a bunch of children’s rides.”

“That’s not a problem. We were actually heading over to the castle to take some photos when we found Charlotte,” Karlie says, “and from what I hear, most of the rides for children are fun for adults too.” She gazes down on Charlotte, who is still holding her hand hopefully. “What do you say, princess? Should we go on some fun rides together?”

“YES!” Charlotte replies enthusiastically.

As the entire entourage, now also including Charlotte and Alaina, makes their way back to the castle in order to find Charlotte’s father and sister, Taylor leans in close to Karlie to whisper into her ear. “I think you made a friend for life,” she whispers and winks at her. 

“I think you might be right.”

After spending a few hours with Charlotte and her family, going on several rides with them with Charlotte insisting on sitting in between Taylor and Karlie for every single ride, Taylor treats the two children to a little shopping spree in one of the gift shops before offering to pay for their lunch.

“You really don’t have to do this,” Alaina says, blushing slightly at Taylor’s offer. “If anything, it should be the other way around.”

“No, don’t be silly,” Taylor says with a smile, “I insist.”

“We’ve had a good time, haven’t we, Charlotte?” Karlie asks the girl, and she nods.

“Can’t you come with us for the rest of the day?” Charlotte asks, her blue eyes attempting to guilt Karlie into saying yes.

“I would love to, but Taylor and I have some things we should get done now.”

“I want to take Karlie on some rollercoasters,” Taylor chimes in and smiles wickedly at Karlie.

“Oh, okay…” Charlotte says, clearly disappointed with the answer.

Karlie drops down to Charlotte’s height and holds both her hands while she looks straight into her blue eyes. “But you know what? I’m going to get your address from your mommy and then I will send you something special once we both get home, okay?”

“Okay,” Charlotte whispers, nodding slowly. 

“Can I have a hug?”

Charlotte nods again, a smile dancing on her face now as she leans in and gives Karlie a big hug.

“Me too?” Taylor asks, and soon the little girl is hugging her too.

“Thank you again for taking care of her,” Alaina says. 

“It was really the least we could do,” Karlie reassures her, “and please, do contact my assistant so we can keep in touch, okay?”

“I will,” Alaina promises.

“Alright. Maybe we’ll see each other again soon, then, Charlotte,” Karlie says and hugs the girl again. “Bye!”

***

Three rollercoaster rides, lots of walking, and several pictures with screaming fans later, Taylor and Karlie are finally sitting down in the restaurant, waiting for their dinner. The restaurant’s been accommodating and has seated them towards the back of the room as far away from curious eyes as possible, with Taylor’s security guards sitting at the table closest to them. 

“Oh, you need to see this text I just got from Tree,” Taylor says in between fits of laughter, holding out her phone.

“”It would be nice to have some warning next time.”,” Karlie reads out loud and giggles. “Wow. We really are making her job difficult, aren’t we?” 

“I feel like she’s trying to tell me to call her or something,” Taylor mumbles, “so I guess I should go ahead and do that.”

Karlie gives Taylor her phone back and sits back in her chair, surveying the room as Taylor calls Tree. Although they are sitting in the back of the room, she can spot several pairs of eyes darting their way every few seconds and she smiles shyly to herself as she focuses her attention back on Taylor again.

“We agreed on late June, Tree. It’s late June,” Taylor says, a hint of sass coating her words and Karlie chuckles. “Yes, I’m aware of that. Oh, what? No, of course not. Karlie just happened to spot the poor thing sitting by herself on a bench and so we did what any good person should do; we entertained her until we could find her parents. It wasn’t a big deal, really. Look, do what you've got to do, okay? Alright, talk to you later. Bye.”

“What was that all about?” Karlie asks as Taylor hangs up the phone, her eyebrow raised in a questioning look.

“Just pictures of the two of us holding hands and looking very couply, complete with children and everything!” Taylor grins. 

“Oh, someone took pictures of us with Charlotte. I guess that was to be expected,” Karlie grimaces.

“Yeah, that always happens.”

“I want that to be us though,” Karlie says quietly, “a few years down the road, maybe?”

Taylor smiles and reaches her hand across the table and puts it on Karlie’s. “I want that too,” she says and holds Karlie’s gaze, making Karlie feel all gooey inside. “One day we will have that.”

***

When the girls watch the Disney Dreams show a few hours later, in the twilight, Karlie puts her arms around Taylor, holding her close. Taylor rests her cheek in the crook of Karlie’s neck, and Karlie takes the opportunity to quickly press her lips to Taylor’s forehead. Taylor tenses and looks up at her, her eyes wide and flitting around, seemingly trying to see if anyone saw them. 

“Relax,” Karlie murmurs quietly into her ear, “no one is watching us,” and she can feel Taylor relax slightly in her arms.

Minutes later, the girls whisper quiet ‘I love you’s’ underneath the fireworks, both of them wishing this moment could last forever.

***

It’s past midnight by the time they finally crawl into bed in Karlie’s hotel room. 

Karlie lies on her side, gazing lovingly at Taylor. “Thank you for today,” she murmurs softly as she runs her fingers down Taylor’s arm. She’s still not quite able to grasp the fact that they held hands in public today, for hours, without their entire world falling apart, and she smiles blissfully and snuggles closer to Taylor.

“You’re welcome,” Taylor says, “I’m really glad we went.”

“Me too.” A comfortable silence engulfs them as they lie there just enjoying each other’s presence. “How badly were you freaking out about the handholding?” Karlie eventually asks, her voice mellow and supportive.

“Like, on a scale from one to ten? A solid eleven.” Taylor laughs and diverts her gaze away from Karlie’s for a second, but her eyes dart back quickly, filled with a look that Karlie recognizes as vulnerability. 

“You know, you did great today. We can do this,” Karlie says reassuringly.

“I know. I’m just… I’m just so scared. I’ve spent so many years hiding this part of me, hiding it from everyone who would feel like they have a right to judge me for the way I choose to live my life, hiding it from myself, even, and to suddenly change that is terrifying.”

Karlie leans in to kiss Taylor lightly. “I think you’re brave,” she says, holding Taylor’s gaze steady in her own, “because you’re choosing to live the way you want to live. You should be proud of that, because I know I am.”

Taylor is quiet for a few moments, staring deeply into Karlie’s eyes. “I love you,” she says so softly Karlie can barely hear it and wraps her arms around Karlie, burying her face in Karlie’s chest.

“I love you too, princess,” Karlie whispers back and kisses Taylor’s hair.

Holding each other close, soon the two girls drift off to sleep. 

***

A week later, Karlie’s hectic month is almost finished, and all that's left for her to do in Europe before she can fly back home for a few weeks of peace and quiet with Taylor is walking for Elie Saab. She’s sent Taylor off to spend the day with Kimby before the show, and both of them are expected to be in the audience once the show starts.

Moments before showtime, Karlie is backstage with Jourdan and Gigi, who are excited to get out there and do their thing. Karlie, however, feels nervous for the first time in a very long time, and she checks her phone anxiously every three seconds, tuning out the conversation the other two have going in the background.

“Babe… Karlie!” Jourdan’s voice penetrates Karlie’s little bubble and she looks up at her quizzically. 

“What?”

“Where is your mind at today? You keep checking your phone and we’ve been trying to get your attention for a good minute.”

“Oh…” Karlie says and flashes a sheepish smile. “It’s just that Taylor’s coming to see me walk for the first time since we did Victoria’s Secret together and she promised to text me to let me know when she got here, but I haven’t heard anything yet and the show starts in five.”

“Oh, Karlie,” Jourdan laughs, “send her a text and ask. I’m sure she just forgot – she wouldn’t miss it.”

Just then, a text notification flashes up on Karlie’s phone screen, making her smile.

“Speaking of the devil, I see,” Jourdan snickers and winks at Karlie. “Is she here?”

“Yeah,” Karlie says, a grin quickly spreading on her face as she reads the text message aloud for the girls to hear. “Sorry, sorry, sorry, we literally just got here. Lunch ran kind of late because we sort of forgot the time, and then we got stuck in traffic trying to get here, and I was so scared I was going to miss it, but we’re here and I hope you get to read this before the show starts. Can’t wait to see you do your thing. I love you!” 

“You guys are disgusting,” Gigi says and grimaces. 

Karlie responds by sticking her tongue out. “Oh shush, you.”

“That’s sweet,” Jourdan says, “and I understand you’re nervous. I’m sure she was just as nervous when you went to see her show last year.” Her gaze moves away from Karlie and ends up focusing on something behind her. “Looks like we’re about to start. Good luck, ladies. I’ll see you after!”

A few minutes later, it’s almost Karlie’s turn to walk. Jourdan’s already walked, seven spots ahead of Karlie, and Gigi is four places behind her. 

As the girl in front of her starts walking, Karlie takes a deep breath to calm herself down. She gets into the zone, feeling a sense of calm spreading through her body as fierceness settles on her face.

The moment she steps out into view, all eyes are on her. Her nerves are gone now that she’s in her element, but when her eyes land on Taylor’s bleached blonde hair and she sees the grin on her girlfriend’s face, her heart skips a beat. She struggles to keep herself from smiling but within a second she has complete control over her emotions again, bottling them away until she’s off the runway.

Walking back out minutes later for the finale along with all the other girls, she feels adrenaline coursing through her veins and it takes all of her strength to not erupt into a fit of giggles on the spot.

When she finally gets to take a peek at her phone, a text from Taylor is waiting for her. “You were AMAZING!” it reads and Karlie grins, an excited tingling spreading from her stomach through her entire body in seconds. She sends a quick text back before she hurries to change out of her dress, thrilled by the thought of being reunited with her girlfriend and hearing everything she has to say about the show.


	29. Chapter 29

Karlie wakes up to quiet serenity in Taylor’s Rhode Island house. The morning light dances on the wall behind her through a small crack in the curtains, no doubt the result of a cat having some fun in the early hours of morning. Looking around, she quickly notices she’s alone in the room and she checks the clock on the bedside table. 8:36. Taylor shouldn’t be up this early; it’s been five days since they flew back from Paris and any residual jetlag should have cleared up long ago, and so Karlie gets out of bed to find out what’s keeping Taylor occupied on this beautiful, sunny morning.

She pulls on a t-shirt as she walks barefoot through the quiet hallway and down the stairs. The house is almost eerily quiet, but Karlie finds it soothing. It’s such a different feeling to their apartment in New York, where the sounds of the city are a constant background noise, but here the only sounds coming from outside are the cool breeze in the air and the sound of waves hugging the beach just below the house. 

She finds Taylor in the kitchen, sitting on a bar stool at the kitchen island, with her laptop in front of her and a mug of coffee sitting idly next to her. As she watches her curiously from the doorway, she notices that Taylor’s fingers are nervously picking at the skin around her nails and her right foot is bouncing on the footrest. She’s staring intensely at her laptop screen, slowly scrolling through pages Karlie can’t read, but from Taylor’s demeanor Karlie knows her girlfriend shouldn’t be reading them. 

Quietly, she walks over to Taylor and wraps her arms around her from behind as she presses a kiss to the top of Taylor’s head. “Babe, are you okay?”

Taylor grabs Karlie’s arms and leans her head on Karlie’s chest. “No,” she whispers and takes a shaky breath, her head still pressed into Karlie’s chest. 

“What are you even looking at?” Karlie asks quietly and starts scrolling back to the top of the article. “Oh,” she mutters as she realizes it’s an article talking about their obvious handholding at Disneyland. “Why were you even looking at this? You know it’s a bad idea.”

“I know,” Taylor says quietly, “but Olivia woke me up and I couldn’t get back to sleep so I decided to check tumblr since it’s been practically forever since I was on there, and this was what everyone was talking about. They had links, and so I stupidly clicked one, and then one turned into two turned into like, ten…”

Karlie takes a step to the side so she can look into Taylor’s eyes. Stroking her hair, she leans in to give her a soft kiss. Tears flow down Taylor’s cheeks and Karlie kisses them away.

“I don’t even know why I’m crying,” Taylor mumbles after a while. “They weren’t even saying anything bad, they’re all just speculating.”

Karlie cups Taylor’s face in her hands and looks deeply into her eyes. “Hey, it’s okay,” she says soothingly, “I know this was never going to be easy for you. No one expects you to be totally okay with the world suddenly knowing about us right away, least of all me. I know this is scary for you, I know you are terrified inside and it’s hard to work through that fear to come out on the other side. But there is another side. This will all be worth it in the end, I promise you that, but if you’re not ready yet, if you need more time, I’m okay with that. We can wait until you’re ready.”

“No,” Taylor shakes her head furiously and wipes her tears with the back of her hand. “I want to do this. I’m tired of being afraid, Karlie.”

“I know, baby,” Karlie replies reassuringly, “but you can get through this. You’re strong,” she kisses Taylor’s forehead, “and brave,” her nose, “and beautiful,” and her lips softly. 

Taylor wraps her arms around Karlie in a tight embrace and rests her head on Karlie’s shoulder. “You make me a better person, Karlie,” she says quietly. “Thank you.”

“You give me too much credit,” Karlie replies and kisses Taylor’s hair again. Taylor only responds by hugging Karlie tighter, refusing to let go for a long while.

***

Karlie is out on the patio getting the barbecue ready for their dinner while Taylor is at the airport along with her security to pick up Abigail, who will be staying with them for a few days. Loading tin foil wrapped fish pieces, lamb chops and chicken into the barbecue, she walks back inside to finish the rest of the meal.

The kitchen counter is full of beautiful vegetables. _This is enough to feed ten people_ , Karlie thinks to herself and chuckles as she starts with the cucumber, chopping it into small cubes. By the time she’s working on chopping the final ingredient for their salad, the red onions, she can hear Taylor’s laugh bouncing off the walls and into the kitchen.

“Babe,” Taylor squeals happily, clearly in a much better mood than this morning, and walks over to give Karlie a short kiss.

“You’re in a better mood,” Karlie murmurs to her before turning to Abigail. “Hey Abigail.” She quickly rinses her hands under the kitchen sink before she gives Abigail a welcoming hug. “It’s great to see you! How are you?”

“Oh, I’m great!” Abigail answers enthuasiastically. “It’s always exciting to spend time with my best girl and her girlfriend.” She puts her arm around Taylor’s back and squeezes her tightly. Their happy giggles make Karlie wonder how they managed to turn into squealing teenagers during the short ride from the airport to the house, but she smiles happily, content that Taylor is happy.

“The salad’s done so we just have to wait for the meat to finish cooking,” Karlie says and gestures to the salad bowl standing on the kitchen counter. “I’ll just clean up here and come join you guys outside, alright?”

“You’re an angel woman,” Taylor coos and gives her another quick peck on the lips before joining her best friend outside.

“So how is my favorite not-so-secret couple?” Abigail asks as Karlie squeezes into the large chair Taylor is already occupying. 

“Can you not sit on top of me like that? You’re heavy,” Taylor complains.

“Fine, move your ass then. I’ll sit on the bottom, I don’t care.” 

Taylor moves a little so Karlie can slide in under her, and settles on her girlfriend’s lap quickly as Karlie throws her hand around Taylor’s side.

“We’re good,” Karlie finally answers Abigail’s question. “Did Taylor tell you what happened this morning?”

“Yeah, she did,” Abigail says. “You know, ever since the media caught onto your handholding, so many people have come up to me to ask questions.”

“Really?” 

“Yeah. Once people find out Taylor Swift is my best friend, they tend to become very nosy.”

“Sorry,” Taylor says and grimaces.

“Don’t worry about it, babe. I know all of your dirty secrets,” Abigail retorts and winks at Taylor. “I have to admit it’s sometimes tempting to tell them things that are absolutely 100% not true, but I manage to resist. Speaking of dirty secrets though, yours is about to scandalize the world. Now, I know all of Taylor’s previous experiences,” she says and smiles wickedly, “I mean, I have witnessed her pining over older boys and girls alike when we were in high school, and let’s not even mention the whole Emily thing, but what about you, Karlie? Do you have any dirty little secret flings from before you met Taylor?”

Karlie laughs nervously at the question. “Dirty little secret flings? Oh God…” 

“Well, I guess what I’m really asking here is how do you label yourself? I know homegirl here is bi, although she most likely would have punched me in the face if I tried to get her to admit that before she met you.”

“I would not,” Taylor protests, “although I would probably have denied it profusely…”

Abigail cocks an eyebrow at her. “My point exactly.”

Karlie runs her fingers down Taylor’s arm as she thinks about Abigail’s question. “If I had to label myself, I guess I would say I'm bisexual as well, but that I generally prefer women over men.”

“So have you had any past relationships?” 

“Other than Josh, you mean?”

“I thought your relationship with him wasn't real?”

“No, you're right, and I guess the answer to your first question is no, not really. I just never had the time, you know? I was so young when I started working, and between work and school and trying to be a normal teenager, I never really had the time. I guess you can say I’ve had a few experiences, though. Everyone does, right?” 

“Yeah, sure. What kind of experiences though?”

Karlie feels herself blush as she tries to find a good way of answering that question. “Err…” she says, “of the girl variety, I guess?”

While Karlie talks, Taylor’s fingers are lazily intertwining themselves with Karlie’s, carefully caressing Karlie’s hand, and Karlie can’t help but smile.

“So no guys then?” Abigail asks nonchalantly. 

“Nothing serious, no.”

“And you and Josh have never…?”

“Oh God, no. No way,” Karlie splutters. 

“You’re a gold star then!” Abigail exclaims with a grin.

“I… guess so?” Karlie says, feeling embarrassed and confused at the same time. 

“How exactly did that whole arrangement with Josh happen, though? I’ve always wondered but I’ve never asked.”

“He asked me out years ago and I said yes,” Karlie says with a small shrug. “I’ve never really felt a lot of attraction towards men, but he was cute and he’s such a lovely guy. It just never clicked for me that way and when I told him, he took it so well and asked if it was okay to still invite me to things because he felt we at least connected on a platonic level. And so we became best friends. At some point, people thought we were dating and it kind of stuck. The longer we ignored talking about it, the more people believed we were together.”

“Ooookay,” Taylor interrupts them, “even though this is a fun topic of conversation and all, can we like, not?” She glares at Abigail, who smiles innocently. “This is my girlfriend we’re talking about here and I’m starting to feel a little uncomfortable.”

Abigail laughs a throaty laugh that makes her red curls bounce. “Sorry Tay, and I’m sorry for the third degree, Karlie,” she says, “I have no filter.”

“I know,” Taylor replies and sticks her tongue out.

“It’s all good,” Karlie says with a smile, but she squeezes Taylor’s hand slightly to say thank you for changing the subject. “I’m starving though, let’s check on the food.”

***

The next two days pass quickly. Although Karlie has met Abigail several times before, she doesn’t want to intrude too much on the few days Taylor and Abigail get to spend together. She knows it’s been so long since Taylor had the time to catch up with her red-haired best friend, face to face, and so she occupies herself with reading, cooking and cleaning.

Now, having dropped Abigail off at the airport, Karlie is walking barefoot alongside Taylor on the beach, her fingers intertwined with Taylor’s as they watch the sun set over the water.

“I’m sorry if you’ve felt left out this weekend,” Taylor says suddenly, breaking the serene silence that’s surrounding them.

Karlie turns her head and meets Taylor’s clear gaze. “What? No,” Karlie replies, “I just wanted to give you guys some space to catch up, although I don’t particularly hate the idea of having you all to myself again. She’s fiery, Abigail, feisty. Must be a redhead thing.” She laughs at her own joke as Taylor rolls her eyes at her, a big smile lighting up her face.

“I have no idea what would give you that impression,” Taylor teases. “She likes you though, and I know you know that. I just hope you didn’t distance yourself due to her questions the other day.”

“I do know that, and no, that didn’t have anything to do with it. I promise I just wanted to let you guys catch up. You are aware neither of you managed to stay quiet for more than like thirty seconds at a time, right?”

A faint blush spreads across Taylor’s cheeks. “Yeah, we kind of tend to do that,” she says as her foot makes circles in the sand, her voice high-pitched.

Karlie pulls her into an embrace and wishes she could kiss her, even if it’s only for a few moments. The beach around them is secluded, but they just can’t risk it yet, even though Rhode Island generally treats them well whenever they go. 

She keeps an arm around Taylor’s waist as they turn to watch the sun disappear in the horizon. Taylor responds by resting her head on Karlie’s shoulder as they stand there in silence.

“I love the quietness here,” Karlie says after a while. “We should come here more often.”

“Once we go public, we could come back here and stay for a while, go off the radar,” Taylor suggests quietly. “We’re probably going to have to go somewhere, so why not here, you know?”

“I like that,” Karlie says. “This place is beautiful.”

As the darkness settles over them, they start walking back towards the house in a comfortable silence until Taylor suddenly yelps.

“Ow, ow, ow, oh my God, ow,” she yells as she starts hopping around on her left foot, grabbing hold of Karlie’s arm to steady herself.

“What happened?”

“I think I stepped on something sharp and it fucking hurts.” Steadying herself enough to take a peek underneath her right foot, Taylor sees a sharp piece of a sea shell sticking out of her foot, a steady stream of blood trickling slowly from it. “Oh fuck, get it out, get it out!”

“I’m not taking that out right here on the spot and neither are you,” Karlie says sternly. 

“But how am I going to get home? I can’t walk on it,” Taylor protests.

“Lucky for you, you have a strong girlfriend.” 

With a grin, Karlie scoops Taylor up into her strong arms, and Taylor wraps her arms around Karlie’s neck.

“My savior,” she murmurs into Karlie’s ear, “what would I do without you?”

***

Well inside the house, Karlie puts Taylor down on the couch. 

“Stay here,” she says, “I’ll be right back.”

She darts upstairs and into the bathroom, rummaging through the medicine cabinet to find all the things she needs: disinfectant, gauze, tweezers, and a bandaid. _Cat bandaids_ , she thinks as she finds a pack of bandaids in one of Taylor’s drawers, and a smile spreads on her face. _Figures_. 

“Okay,” she says as she walks back into the living room, placing everything on the coffee table. “Don’t move. I need to yank it out and then we have to make sure there isn’t anything broken off in there.”

“This is going to hurt, isn’t it?” Taylor whines, her voice a little shakier than usual.

“It’ll hurt less once it’s out, I promise.”

Taylor grits her teeth as Karlie carefully removes the sea shell. It’s small, but sharp, and Karlie spends some time poking the skin surrounding the wound, making sure no pieces are left behind. Once she’s confident everything is out, she presses the gauze down on it for a while before covering the wound with a bandaid.

“There,” Karlie says as she lies down next to Taylor and gives her a kiss, “all better.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Forgive me if I spend a little more time than usual writing the next few chapters. I have some really long weeks at work coming up but I'll do my best! :D


	30. Chapter 30

It’s a Thursday evening in the middle of July when Taylor suddenly mutes the movie they're half-watching from bed, turns towards Karlie, and tells her: “I think I want to do a tell-all.”

As well as Karlie knows her girlfriend, there are still those rare moments, like this one, when she manages to take her completely by surprise, and she stares back at Taylor in bewilderment. A tell-all? Since when did she want to tell all of her secrets to the world?

When no words come out of Karlie’s mouth, Taylor just continues. “I’ve just been thinking about it ever since Abigail asked you all those questions a few days ago, and I figure… I think I owe it to my fans and to myself to be completely honest, you know?”

Karlie continues to stare at Taylor, completely dumbfounded by the announcement, and eventually Taylor waves her hand in front of Karlie’s face. “Um, hello? Earth to Karlie?”

Karlie shakes her head slightly, focusing her attention on Taylor. “Sorry,” she mutters, her brain not quite managing to come up with words, “I just, you what?”

Taylor smiles sheepishly at her. “It’s probably a stupid idea.”

“No, no, it’s not that,” Karlie says. “It’s just… I never thought you’d want to do that.”

“It wasn’t something I originally planned on doing,” Taylor admits. Her hands fiddle around nervously in her lap and Karlie grabs them both in hers, stroking them softly. “But I think it might be for the best. You know how I’ve had these rumors trail after me for years, ever since Emily, but I’ve never actually addressed them, not really. I was too afraid to.”

“But why address them now?”

Taylor looks away for a second, exhaling loudly. “I think if I really, truly want to stop hiding, if _we_ want to stop hiding, I need to come clean about certain things in my past too. I can’t really be free if I keep hiding them, because my past is what has made me who I am now.”

Karlie mulls it over for a short moment as she gently pushes back a strand of hair from Taylor’s face. “That makes sense,” she eventually says. 

“I’m also hoping that maybe the whole thing will die down a lot faster if I just come clean immediately. Maybe there will be less speculation if I've already told them the whole story.”

“Yeah,” Karlie says, “do you know who you want to do this tell-all interview with?”

“I was thinking maybe Ellen would want to do it.”

“Has she ever done anything like that?” 

“No, but I feel like maybe she’d want to do it anyway. She’s known me for years and I kind of feel like she’s the right person to do this, you know?”

“Yeah, I know,” Karlie says and smiles playfully at Taylor, “I’ve seen your Ellen videos. I especially like the one where you fall on your ass.”

“Oh God, don’t remind me. I was terrified!” 

“I know,” Karlie coos and wraps her arms around Taylor, pulling her close. “Seriously though, if this is what you want to do then you should do it. I’ll support you no matter what, you know that. I’m not going anywhere. 

“I know,” Taylor whispers, her face buried in the crook of Karlie’s neck. “Thank you.”

***

Once Taylor had the idea in her mind of what she wanted to do, everything happened in rapid succession. She briefed Tree and her parents, and called Ellen, who was absolutely ecstatic to hear about their relationship and honored that Taylor wanted her to do the interview, and suddenly, a week later, Taylor and Karlie find themselves back in Taylor’s LA house, waiting for Ellen’s team to come over and set everything up.

“I can’t believe I’m doing this,” Taylor mutters frantically to herself as she paces back and forth in the living room. “And here, of all places. I’m doing this here, in our house, and I’m going on national television to tell everyone that, guess what? America's sweetheart is into girls. Why did I think this was a good idea? Why is everyone letting me do this? This isn't going to end well. Not at all.”

Karlie isn’t quite sure if Taylor is just thinking out loud, but she knows she has to do something to try to calm her down. Getting up from the chair she’s been sitting in, she stops Taylor’s pacing by placing her hands on Taylor’s shoulders, forcing the shorter girl to gaze up at her. “Stop,” Karlie says firmly, holding Taylor’s gaze. “Breathe. You can do this.”

“But…” Taylor starts, meekly, but Karlie interrupts her.

“No. You can do this. It will be incredibly scary and I know that, but you love Ellen and she loves you, and I love you, and this is worth it.” 

She pulls Taylor into a comforting hug and strokes her back gently for a while. “Also, I definitely heard you say ‘our house’ and if you for a second thought I would gloss right over that just because you're freaking out, you were wrong,” she purrs softly into Taylor’s ear, causing Taylor to giggle.

“I still don’t know what I did to deserve you,” Taylor murmurs into Karlie’s chest. “You have this way of always making me feel better.”

Their moment is interrupted by the phone ringing.

“Miss Swift, Ellen and her TV crew are here, we’re about to buzz them in.”

“Alright, thank you Jamie,” Taylor answers. She immediately starts muttering to herself again. “Oh God, oh God, this is happening, this is actually happening.”

“Taylor,” Karlie warns, taking her hand, “you’ll be fine.”

“You’re staying right?” Taylor asks. Her stare is pleading, and Karlie can see that her eyes are starting to glaze over.

Pulling Taylor in again, she plants a kiss on her mouth, and she can feel Taylor quivering slightly. “I’ll be right here, I’m not leaving you.”

As soon as the doorbell rings, Taylor takes a deep breath and stands tall, seemingly bracing herself for what’s about to happen before she opens the door for her guests. “Hi! Welcome, please come inside,” she says, a huge smile plastered onto her face as she greets Ellen with a big hug.

“It’s so good to see you,” Ellen says before turning to Karlie. “And you must be Karlie! I’ve heard so many great things about you.” 

“Likewise,” Karlie beams at her, her heart pounding just a little louder than usual. 

Ellen takes a step back and studies Karlie curiously for a second. “You’re a giant,” she states after a few seconds, “What’s your secret? What did they feed you back in St. Louis and can I have some?”

Karlie laughs nervously. “I think they must have put something in the water.”

Talking to Ellen is easier than Karlie expected and they banter back and forth for a little while as the crew set up for the interview in the living room. 

“Did you watch the video I sent you?” Taylor asks Ellen after a while.

“I did. I liked how it was set up, with them ringing your doorbell. I like your idea of doing the same thing here, make it clear that we're at your house, make it personal. That's what we want for this interview, right? We can obviously skip the house tour, we can just go straight into the living room from here.”

“Sounds good to me.”

“If you’re ready, we can start in a few minutes,” Ellen says and pats Taylor’s arm softly. “You’re nervous, aren’t you?”

“I am,” Taylor admits, but she keeps her voice strong and confident, trying to make it seem like she won't let her nerves get the best of her.

“I absolutely understand,” Ellen replies, “but you can do this.”

Taylor meets her gaze and nods silently, fiddling nervously with her hands. Taking another deep breath, she calms herself down, her hands now smoothing out her black and dark grey striped dress. “Okay, let’s do this.” 

“I’ll be right over here, okay?” Karlie says softly, grabbing one of Taylor’s hands and squeezing it reassuringly. She whispers “I love you” quietly into Taylor’s ear, letting her hand trail down Taylor’s arm as she moves away, and Taylor smiles at her, her eyes following Karlie until she’s out of view. 

Karlie watches in nervous silence as Ellen and her camera man go back outside to ring the doorbell. Taylor answers cheerfully, and Karlie wonders if anyone else will be able to pick up on how her voice is just that little bit shakier than usual. 

“Thank you for inviting us into your home,” Ellen says as the two of them sit down in two of Taylor’s lounge chairs. “I love what you’ve done with the place.”

“Thank you,” Taylor says and smiles, “and thank you for coming. It’s really lovely to have you here.” She absentmindedly stroke her hands over her dress again before letting them rest in her lap.

“It’s lovely to be here! How are you? It’s been a while since the last time you were on my show.”

“It has! But I’m good, thank you.”

“That’s good to hear. Now, Taylor, today is a special occasion. You’re about to do something very unusual, aren’t you? Would you like to tell the people watching at home why you've invited us here today?”

Karlie notices that Taylor’s fidgeting in her seat as she starts talking.

“Today is probably the only time I will ever talk openly and freely about my love life,” she starts out, and takes a deep breath before she goes on. “Because there’s someone wonderful in my life that I haven’t told the world about, someone who has stayed with me through all of the stressful and all of the wonderful times, someone who was there every single time I came home in between shows, feeling exhausted, and just… She’s amazing and I want the world to know how much I love her.”

Pride soars through Karlie as soon as she hears the words “she” and “I love her”, and she beams at the still-fidgeting Taylor, even though Taylor’s gaze is nowhere near her. 

“Are you saying you have a…” 

“A girlfriend. Yes, I am,” Taylor interrupts, unable to keep the smugness out of her smile completely.

“It's been hard avoiding all of the speculation about you and your BFF Karlie recently. You've been all over together: runway shows, Disneyland Paris, Rhode Island... I assume she's the lucky lady who's stolen your heart?”

“You're right, she is. Karlie's the reason for all of this. She's amazing." Taylor can't suppress a smile at that, and Karlie feels her heart flutter. “The thing about Karlie is that she’s so caring. She will go out of her way to make sure that you have a good day, or she'll come over to see you just for a few minutes because she missed you. She has a beautiful mind and a view on life that I think most people envy, because there’s just so much life surrounding her. She’s the sunshine of my life.”

“Seeing the way you light up when you talk about her reminds me of when I first met Portia. That feeling, it's still there and it’s a greatest feeling in the world, isn’t it?”

“It is,” Taylor says with a knowing smile.

“You met Karlie at the Victoria’s Secret fashion show, right?”

“Officially, yes, that is when we met, in 2013. I knew about her before, obviously, but we had never actually met in person or spoken much before that. We kind of just hit it off from there. It was like I found the missing piece of my soul that night because we just _clicked_ , you know?”

“I do,” Ellen says and smiles.

The more they talk, the more Taylor starts to relax. Karlie notices that Taylor has stopped fidgeting; her hands are lying calmly in her lap when she’s not gesticulating and her smile comes out more often than not. It’s almost like those initial nerves have disintegrated into nothing, at least until Ellen finishes asking the next question.

“As you know, I have been where you are. I came out publicly on TV, and it was difficult and scary. I really commend you for what you’re doing; I know exactly what you are going through. I have to ask though, why now? What influenced your decision of coming out?”

Taylor shifts in her seat, obviously trying to string her thoughts together into a coherent answer. “I think there are many reasons,” she starts out and clears her throat, “first of all, hiding in plain sight is exhausting and I don’t want to keep doing it.”

“That’s understandable,” Ellen replies and nods. 

“The media has made me out to be this man-eater for years, this girl who traps guys by the dozen, chews them up and spits them back out only to write songs about them and how they've wronged her. I’ve been made out to be this needy and clingy and horrible girl, who uses these men to sell records and make money,” Taylor continues, “1989 was very much about finding myself again as an individual, to try to dissociate myself from this ridiculous label the media put on me. I want to be clear about the fact I haven't lied about my previous relationships. My songs are about my life, and the feelings that inspired them were very much real, but the eternal scrutiny I’ve been under has been really difficult to deal with at times. I had to become more confident in myself, I had to learn to believe in myself again, to know my worth, and that is such a valuable thing for women to achieve, to find your own strength and value, and to not judge yourself by what others say about you. I had this segment every night on The 1989 World Tour where I would talk to my fans about this. I would talk to them about happiness, how we all struggle on some level, but that we all have value, that we’re all worth something, but the more I talked about it, the more I felt like I was lying to myself and to them. I showed them glimpses of the truth, but I hid away a huge part of who I am. I know people will question my songs and all of my previous relationships, and that has definitely been one of the reasons why I _haven’t_ come out before, but... I don’t want any of my friends or fans to be ashamed of who they are, so why should I be ashamed of who I am?”

“Obviously this is something you have been struggling with for a while,” Ellen says.

“It is.”

“Were you ever pressured into hiding this part of yourself by other people, maybe your family, or your label, or was it something you wanted to do for yourself?”

Taylor’s hands start fidgeting in her lap as she looks away for the briefest of seconds. “I…” she says but stops herself and it’s clear that she’s not entirely sure how to answer the question. Ellen picks up on the hesitation and asks her another question to get her started.

“Was it maybe something that happened as a result of you being with another girl?”

Taylor’s eyes meet Ellen’s in a sharp stare, but she nods hesitantly.

“I was sixteen,” she says quietly and takes a deep breath. 

_You can do this_ , Karlie thinks, and it’s almost like Taylor can hear her because her gaze flicks towards Karlie for a split second before she continues, her voice stronger and clearer now.

“I had just started out in the industry. My first album was already out and I was working on Fearless, and there was a girl who I liked and who liked me back. I guess I was young and foolish, naïve, and some people found out… You have to remember that being anything but straight in the country music scene is almost unheard of. Think of Chely Wright and how it was for her when she came out in 2010. She was a hugely successful artist, she’d had 16 years in the industry by the time she came out, and she was practically slaughtered by it. Imagine what would have happened to an innocent teenager back in 2006. My career had barely started. Sure, I had a good first album and people talked about how I would have a future in country music. They called me the princess of country, and there were huge expectations in the industry. My album was full of songs about boys, girls my age were telling me how they loved my music because it was so relatable, and their parents were telling me what a great rolemodel I was. It would have been career suicide to come out and say “guess what? I like girls, too,” back then, and the potential backlash would have absolutely ruined me psychologically. So yeah, I guess you can say there was direct pressure, but I understood why it was necessary, and I was scared, so I went along with it. You do what you have to to succeed, but I’m not that same insecure teenager anymore. I can take whatever they will throw at me now, so it’s time to stop being afraid.”

“You were saying earlier how you met Karlie in 2013. Did you start dating straight away?”

“No, that happened about six months after we met,” Taylor replies.

“You also said that all of your previous relationships have been real. What about Calvin Harris, whom you had a very public breakup with earlier this year?”

Taylor visibly cringes at the sound of his name, but she recovers quickly before answering. “He is the only exception, and I will explain why. I’m sure you remember how the media were having a field day back in December of 2014, with all of these headlines about ‘Taylor Swift switching teams, kissing BFF Karlie Kloss at a concert’?” 

“I do remember that, yes.”

“At that point in time, I just wasn’t ready for this to come out. I had spent eight years hiding this part of me and I was absolutely certain that if it did come out, everything I had worked so hard for would crumble under me and I’d be disowned by my own fans and, even though I'd just made a pop album, I was scared of how the country music fans would react. Fear is a powerful thing, and I wasn’t strong enough to fight it at the time. The best thing I could do was to get the focus away from our relationship and having a boyfriend, even if it wasn’t real, was the best way to do that. I’m not proud of it, but it is a big contributing factor to us even having this conversation today. I needed that extra time to work through my fears.”

Ellen smiles at her reassuringly. “I absolutely understand how you feel,” she says, “and I think I speak for a lot of people when I say thank you for sharing your story so honestly. I know so many young girls will watch this and hopefully feel better about themselves, feel that they have an ally on their side who knows what they are going through, and maybe they'll have the courage to be themselves as well.”

“Thank you,” Taylor says, her eyes glossing over.

“Is there anything else you’d like to say to your fans?”

Taylor turns her head and looks directly into the camera. “I want you all to know that you're brilliant. You are brave, and no matter what it is that makes you feel insecure, and terrified, I believe you're strong enough to be honest, and true to yourself. Believe in yourself; I truly believe you can do anything you set your mind to.”

As the camera shuts off, Karlie immediately swoops in to hug Taylor tightly. “You did great,” she whispers into Taylor’s ear in between tiny pecks.

“Thank you,” Taylor replies quietly, her body trembling ever so slightly against Karlie’s. 

She breaks their hug just as Ellen walks over to them, putting a hand on Taylor’s shoulder. “You did really well,” she says. “I know what comes next will be difficult, but it will only get better from here on out. I’m proud of you, kiddo.” Her smile is so genuine that Karlie feels all warm inside as she watches the little exchange between Taylor and Ellen. “So listen,” Ellen continues, “Portia and I would love to have the two of you over for dinner tonight if you have time. We could help you decide when would be the best time to air this if you’d like.”

Taylor doesn’t even ask Karlie before accepting the invitation, but Karlie doesn’t mind at all and her stomach makes a small, excited flutter as she thinks about having dinner with Ellen DeGeneres and her wife – it’s almost like a dream come true. 

Olivia walks over and butts her head against Karlie’s leg. She picks the cat up and cuddles her lovingly as she walks into the kitchen to find some cat food, leaving Taylor behind to say goodbye to Ellen and her camera crew.


	31. Chapter 31

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We need something cute in our lives:

It is almost 1am by the time Taylor and Karlie arrive back home after the dinner party. Even though Karlie’s feeling a little tired, it’s nothing compared to the exhaustion she can read on Taylor’s face as they walk through the door and into the hallway, kicking off their shoes by the door. 

“I’m going to make some tea,” Taylor mumbles sleepily and looks at Karlie. “Do you want some?”

“Sure, thanks,” she replies, “I’ll be right there.”

Karlie listens to the water filling up the kettle as she locks the door and turns off the light in the hallway before she joins Taylor in the kitchen. She finds her sitting on the seat by the window, her arms propped up on her knees, her head in her hands. 

“What a day,” Taylor mutters. She rubs her face for a few seconds before looking up at Karlie, pure exhaustion showing on her face.

Karlie sits down next to her and wraps her arms around her protectively, holding her close. “I’m so proud of you,” she says softly as she strokes Taylor’s hair. 

Taylor relaxes in Karlie’s arms as they sit there, the silence only penetrated by the sounds of the kettle bringing the water to a boil. Once it’s done Karlie kisses Taylor’s hair and gets up to find two mugs. “What kind do you want?”

“Whichever.”

She picks out two tea bags from the cupboard and pours the water in before placing both of the mugs on the counter next to them. Taking Taylor’s hands in hers, she looks Taylor straight in the eyes. “Are you okay?”

Taylor nods slowly and sighs before answering. “I am,” she says slowly, “I… everything is about to get very real and it’s terrifying.”

“I know,” Karlie says, soothingly. “But I think the hardest part is over. You’ve said the words out loud, but it's not airing for a while. There’s still time to get used to the idea of those words being said.”

“I kind of wish we could just go away for a while, let the fire rage here while we’re away.”

“We can do that,” Karlie says with a smile.

“We can’t just up and leave right now, Karlie. You have your camp starting Monday and…”

“Hey,” Karlie interrupts Taylor and cups her face in her hands. “We’ll go after. We can go once the interview airs in a few weeks, I promise.”

“Okay,” Taylor whispers and wraps her arms around Karlie, giving her a long, tight hug.

“Come on,” Karlie says after a little while, “let’s get you into bed.” With her mug of tea in one hand and Taylor’s in the other, she leads Taylor out of the kitchen to the bedroom. 

***

When Karlie wakes up from her alarm on the morning of her birthday, she’s surprised to find Taylor’s side of the bed empty and cold. Sitting up in a sleepy haze, she stifles a yawn as she looks around their New York bedroom. _It's good to be home_ , she thinks and smiles to herself. Spending time with the kids at the LA camp has been awesome, but there’s just something special about being home in New York for her birthday.

She gets out of bed and has just thrown on a shirt when she spots it: a note glued to the bedroom door. Curious, she walks over and picks it off the door.

_Happy birthday, beautiful! In true Swift fashion, follow the clues to find your presents. Go find your phone for further instructions and your first clue._

Karlie chuckles to herself as she puts the note down on the dresser by the door. _I should have guessed_ , she thinks, unable to wipe the smile off her face as she walks through the hallway and down the stairs.

She finds her phone on the kitchen counter, the same place she left it last night before they stumbled to bed, lips and hands all over each other. Her smile grows at the thought of that memory as she picks up the phone to find a text message from Taylor.

_Okay, the aim is the find your presents (and me). No cheating, you have to follow the clues. First clue: The very first time you saw me cry, I ruined our dinner by bleeding all over it. Where did you take me?_

Karlie laughs and rolls her eyes a little at Taylor’s clue. It was their third date and Taylor wanted to impress her with dinner. Not paying attention to the vegetables she was chopping, she sliced her finger instead and Karlie quickly found a kitchen towel and rushed her into the closest bathroom.

_Right, the bathroom_ , Karlie concludes, and hurries out of the kitchen, taking her phone with her.

She finds the next clue inside of the bathroom cabinet where she found antiseptic solution back then. Next to it is a small tin of puppy band-aids. 

_I have my cats, now you have dogs! Next clue: I surprised you with a key. Where?_

Karlie feels all gooey inside when she thinks back to the day Taylor gave her a key to her place. She was just about to head home after yet another comfortable and relaxing night in with Taylor, but before she made it to the door, Taylor grabbed her arm.

“Wait,” she said quietly, “I got you something.”

She walked over to the closet and fished something out from a coat pocket before walking back over to her and pressing a little silver key into Karlie’s hand. Karlie gaped at her, tears swimming in her eyes as she embraced Taylor in a hug. 

Now, Karlie walks over to the same closet and sticks her hand into the pocket of that same coat, pulling out a note and a small, silver keychain with a love heart and an infinity symbol.

_Not that either of us really needed it, but I got us one each._

The next few clues lead Karlie to the living room, where she finds a note inside of the piano ( _I may or may not have made you a birthday playlist on your phone_ ), up to her old bedroom, where a small, lined notebook with a cookie print cover lies waiting for her on the nightstand ( _To write down new cookie recipes_ ), and back downstairs to the den behind the kitchen. 

Next to the painting of the princess and the sunshine girl, a small, framed cross-stitch piece is hanging with a note pinned behind it. Karlie studies the cross-stitch first. It’s beautiful and intricate, with many colorful flowers in the middle and the words _you are the best thing that’s ever been mine_ surrounding them. Karlie immediately recognizes the words and grins as she grabs the note. 

_And where did I make you mine for the first time?_

Karlie can feel herself blush as she rereads the note a few times. It was three weeks into their relationship when Taylor took Karlie by surprise and led the younger girl into the bedroom one evening, neither of them making any attempt at leaving the bed until rays of sunshine danced on the bedroom wall the next morning. 

Hurrying up the stairs now, Karlie has an idea of where this is going, and she chuckles when she’s proven right. It is obvious that Taylor has sneakily added in her last note and present while Karlie was making her way through the ones downstairs, because the bed is made and a small gift bag is placed on it.

With a knowing smile on her face, Karlie dumps its contents onto the bed and out falls a set of lingerie. It’s beautiful, emerald green with intricate lace, but Karlie can’t help but laugh. “I see how it is,” she says to herself and shakes her head lovingly as she finds the note with the last clue.

_Davis joined us here for an evening and we couldn’t stop laughing._

Grabbing her things, but leaving the lingerie on the bed, she walks into the hallway and opens the door out to the terrace. “Are you sure sexy lingerie is a present for me?” she yells out teasingly, and Taylor’s laugh greets her from around the corner.

“Okay, that might be more of a present for me,” Taylor admits as soon as Karlie rounds the corner. Taylor’s soft arms wrap themselves around Karlie’s neck and their lips meet for a brief moment. “Happy birthday, baby. Did you like the little treasures on your scavenger hunt?” 

“I did,” Karlie chuckles, “I’m actually really interested in checking out this playlist you made me. Obviously I haven’t had the time to listen to it yet.”

“Listen to it at the gym later,” Taylor advices, her eyes glinting in the sunlight. 

“I will,” Karlie grins, “so what’s this?” She gesticulates to the table full of food in front of them and sits down in the nearest chair.

“This is your birthday breakfast, silly,” Taylor teases, “and this,” she hurries to the other side of the table and pull out a long, gift-wrapped box, “is your _actual_ birthday present.”

Karlie accepts it with a huge smile on her face, and pops a strawberry into her mouth before she opens it. The wrapper comes off easily, revealing a plain, brown box underneath it, and Karlie can hardly contain her excitement as she removes the lid. Inside is a mysterious cylinder made of some kind of shiny metal, adorned with several kinds of crystals and two buttons, one silver and one neon blue. 

“What is it?” Karlie asks as she takes it out of the box, rotating it easily in her hand while she studies the design. “Whatever it is, it’s beautiful.”

“Try the silver button,” Taylor suggests, and Karlie does as she’s told. Immediately, a thinner, translucent rod is pushed out of the other, clicking into place. 

“You’re kidding me,” Karlie exclaims, looking up at Taylor.

“Turn it on,” Taylor says, “you know you want to.” 

She winks at Karlie, who squeals happily as she presses the blue button, lighting up the rod. 

“I cannot believe you got me a lightsaber,” she exclaims, feeling absolutely ecstatic.

“Technically it’s a flashlight, but details…” Taylor shrugs. “It’s custom made, though! You’re the only person in the world with this exact one.”

“You are the best girlfriend ever,” Karlie murmurs and gets up to give Taylor a thank-you kiss. 

“I got one for myself too.”

“Of course you did,” Karlie laughs and sits back down, waving her lightsaber around in the air, getting a feel for it. “This is awesome.”

“I’m glad you like it!”

Karlie is occupied with her new possession and they eat breakfast in happy silence, only interrupted by giggles, until Taylor speaks.

“I was thinking we should go for ice cream after your workout.”

Karlie smiles at her. “That would be really nice. It’s such a beautiful day already.”

“I’ll come pick you up then, and we can go to Central Park and just enjoy the day in the sunshine.”

“I’d like that,” Karlie says happily, “but only if I can hold your hand.” She winks mischievously at Taylor, who giggles.

“Deal.”

***

A few hours later, Karlie is stuffing her gym clothes into her bag, getting ready to spend the afternoon outside in the sun with Taylor. 

She glances at her reflection in the mirror while waiting for Taylor to call, admiring the look of her new summer dress she got only a few days ago. Her hair is still wet from the shower, and she tucks a strand of it behind her ear as she decides to wear it loose for once. 

Her phone buzzes on the bench behind her and she smiles. “Hey babe,” she says, “are you outside?”

“Yeah, we’re pulling up like, now.”

“Alright, I’ll be out in a sec.”

Grabbing her things quickly, Karlie rushes out the door, waving to a few of the girls who are about to get started on their workout. 

The black SUV is waiting for her behind a silver Mercedes, and she’s happy to see there are no paparazzi around. Taylor opens the door for her and she crawls in, closing it firmly behind her.

“Hi babe,” she murmurs and leans in for a kiss as the car starts moving, but breaks it seconds later to stare Taylor up and down. “You look _nice_!” She takes in Taylor’s look, etching it into her memory: ripped blue jean shorts, white sneakers, a white t-shirt and her bleach blonde hair worn loose. 

Taylor blushes slightly and laughs. “Thank you for saying that,” she says and leans in for another kiss.

“I’m serious,” Karlie mumbles in between kisses, “I am loving this new, edgy look of yours. Please wear this stuff forever.”

Taylor responds by lightly biting Karlie’s lower lip, putting some more heat into their kiss, showing Karlie just how much she enjoys the compliment.

“Okay,” Karlie says and breaks away from the kiss, “as much as I love this, we are actually in the car…” She nods embarrassedly to Mike and Jeff through the mirror, and Jeff nods back with a wink.

“Thank you, miss Kloss,” he says and she laughs.

“Anytime, Jeff. Anytime.”

They sit in silence on their way to Central Park, sitting close to each other with their hands intertwined, but Karlie can notice that Taylor’s getting nervous as they get closer to their destination. 

“Are you okay?” she asks, and Taylor nods, giving her a kiss on the cheek, and Karlie decides not to push the issue. 

***

They spend the afternoon walking around the park, hand in hand. It almost feels normal to walk around like this, if only it wasn’t for the three security guys surrounding them at all times, and Karlie smiles as she looks around, studying the people around them. 

“It’s such a beautiful day,” she says as she tilts her head upwards a little bit to feel the sun on her face. 

“It really is,” Taylor replies, “you know, I was always told as a child that if you were good the entire year, it would be sunny on your birthday.”

“Does this mean I’ve been good this year then?” Karlie asks and sticks her tongue out, causing Taylor to laugh.

“I think you are sunshine personified so yes, Karlie, you’ve been good. Even when you’ve been bad.” She winks and Karlie can feel herself blush a deep shade of crimson.

“Oh hey, look,” Taylor says suddenly, “it’s the ice cream man. Okay, stay here. I’ll be right back.”

She rushes off with Kevin and Bruce, leaving Karlie behind with Jeff. 

“Sorry about earlier,” Karlie says after a few moments of silence.

“It’s not a problem,” Jeff replies, “it’s not like it’s the first time that has happened.” He laughs a throaty laughter and Karlie can’t help joining in.

“Yeah… that doesn’t actually make me feel any less awkward about it.”

“Don’t worry about it,” he says and sends a genuine smile her way.

Taylor comes back with two ice cream cones and hands one to Karlie. “Cookie dough chocolate chip, just like you like it,” she says before turning to Jeff. “if you’d like some, you can go pick your flavors. It’s on me.”

“You’re amazing,” Karlie murmurs to her as soon as Jeff is out of earshot. 

“I just bought them ice cream, Karlie, it doesn’t make me Mother Theresa.”

“No, but… you are.”

Just then, a drop of melted ice cream drips down onto Karlie’s dress.

“Oh no,” she groans, “please tell me you brought some napkins?”

Taylor fishes one out of her pocket with a huge grin and holds it out. Karlie quickly grabs it and dabs on her dress, making sure to lick the sides of her ice cream every now and then to make sure it doesn’t happen again.

She’s just scrunched up the napkin, silently wishing she wasn’t wearing a dress, when she notices Taylor looking at her. There’s a look in her eyes that Karlie doesn’t recognize, and she looks back down at her dress, her hand going up to her face. “What? Do I have ice cream on my nose?”

Taylor doesn’t reply, she just stares at her with a small smile on her face until she suddenly moves in and plants her lips on Karlie’s, kissing her slowly, gently.

Karlie can feel several pairs of eyes staring at them, but in this exact moment she can’t bring herself to care about their audience. All she cares about is the softness of Taylor’s lips and the exhilaration running through her body from the pit of her stomach all the way out to her fingertips. When Taylor finally pulls away, all Karlie wants to do is pull her back in, to do it again, but the ice cream now trickling down her hand reminds her of where they are and what they’re doing.

“Happy birthday,” Taylor murmurs into her ear before going back to her own ice cream, smiling shyly at her as the crowd around them cheers and claps.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What a weekend, you guys...   
> It's been harder to write this chapter than I imagined it would be. I've had this moment planned for months, but the fact it happened to be scheduled around the same time of a major tragedy was a big set-back.   
> The story isn't over yet, not by a long shot, but I might need some time to think about how to continue it, to get into the right headspace again. I have some really interesting things coming up in the story though so don't worry. I'll do my best to update continuously throughout the summer.
> 
> Stay safe out there, I love you all.


	32. Chapter 32

Coming back to their apartment only an hour later is a surreal experience. As they pull up in front of the building, the street is filled with people, paparazzi and regular onlookers alike. They seem to hold a respectable distance as the car comes to a halt, Jeff and Bruce leaving the vehicle to get the girls safely inside.

“Word travels fast,” Karlie mumbles as she stares out at the crowd surrounding them.

She turns her head as soft fingers wrap themselves around her own and is met with a soft smile and an understanding gaze.

“It will be okay,” Taylor says comfortingly, “are you ready?”

They exit the car hand in hand and hurry towards the doors, Taylor’s security guards sucessfully shielding them from the crowd, though not from the shouts and questions being hurled at them. Karlie can’t help but listen to some of them.

“How long have you been dating?”

“What about your boyfriend, Karlie?”

“Were the rumors true?”

_Shit_ , she thinks to herself but she keeps her mouth shut and her head high until the doors close behind them. 

“That was more intense than usual,” she says as they wait for the elevator, and Taylor nods. 

“It was,” Taylor agrees with a shrug, “but I guess that is what happens when Taylor Swift kisses a girl in public.”

Karlie turns towards her and stares skeptically at her. “How are you so calm about this right now?”

Taylor takes a deep breath before answering, showing Karlie how shaky her breath really is. “Had to own up to my own choices, didn’t I?” She grins at Karlie and leans in to give her a kiss with trembling lips. “And if you thought kissing you in public was all I had planned for you today, just wait and see what I will do to you later.” 

***

Whatever Taylor had in mind for later had to wait a while. From the second they walked through the door of their apartment, her phone rang non-stop and she was wrapped up in conversation for hours. Karlie sat by her for most of it, listening in on the one-sided conversations when she wasn't dealing with calls of her own. 

Now, three hours later, Karlie’s stomach is growling loudly, reminding her they’ve completely forgotten about dinner. She glances at the clock before calling Jeff, knowing he’s just about to go home. 

“Hey, I know you’re about to leave, but could you get one of the guys who just got on shift to grab us some pizza? Considering how many people were outside when we got home, I don’t think I want to venture back outside today. Tell them to grab themselves some too, it’s on us.”

“I can do that, miss Kloss.”

“Thank you, Jeff!”

Across the room from her, Taylor has just finished up a conversation when her phone starts ringing again. Instead of picking it up, she throws it across the couch and buries her head in her hands.

“Make it stop,” she says with a groan, making no attempts of getting up to pick it up from where it landed on the floor.

Karlie walks over to her and sits down, wrapping her long arms around Taylor before she pulls her in.

“I’m so tired, Karlie. I’ve been talking with people for hours. All I want to do is enjoy my evening with you, but they keep on calling!” She lets out a frustrated scream and pummels the pillow next to her in exasperation.

“Hey, hey, hey,” Karlie says soothingly. “Forget about your phone. I just called the guys and they’re bringing us pizza. In the meantime, we should go upstairs, far away from the phones. I can think of an activity that might make you relax.”

“Oh, you can, can you?” Taylor smirks, flashing Karlie a sly smile. 

Karlie stands up and grabs Taylor’s hand, pulling her up from the couch. “Come on,” she says and leads her up the stairs, leaving the ringing phone on the floor behind them. 

Well inside their bedroom, Karlie immediately removes her dress, dumping it on the floor in front of their bedroom door. She glances at Taylor seductively, and gets the response she wants: a reached out hand softly caressing her, Taylor’s teeth biting down on the left side of her bottom lip as she looks at Karlie with wonder.

“You’re so beautiful it hurts,” she murmurs quietly before her eyes flicker towards Karlie’s face, focusing on her lips. It only takes Taylor a split second to place her lips on Karlie’s, pushing her forwards and down onto the bed in the process.

“Oh,” Karlie lets out as Taylor pins her down, placing both of her hands on Karlie’s cheeks while she kisses her hungrily. One of Taylor’s hands slips behind Karlie’s neck before it trails down Karlie’s back, sending shivers down Karlie’s spine.

Taylor lets her lips work on Karlie for a long time, moving the focus further and further downwards towards her chest. The feeling of Taylor’s lips on her skin gives Karlie a headrush, forcing her eyes shut with pleasure, and she lets out a small whimper, barely audible. Taylor definitely picks up on it because she suddenly removes her lips and pushes Karlie down flat on her back, crawling on top of her. She places her lips back on Karlie’s chest, her teeth grazing her nipples every now and then as her fingers trail down Karlie’s stomach, slipping in between Karlie’s legs. 

“I might have one more birthday present for you,” Taylor murmurs in between kisses and it takes everything Karlie has to answer.

“Oh, do you?” she manages to get out, Taylor’s teasing almost overwhelming her with pleasure. 

With an affirmative hum, Taylor suddenly gets up from the bed, giving Karlie a short break from the teasing. Karlie opens her eyes and watches as Taylor discards layers of clothing in a trail leading from the bed to the dresser by the door. There she opens the middle drawer and pulls out a box from under a pile of t-shirts that she brings back to the bed, a wicked smile on her face.

She crawls back on top of Karlie, naked now, and sits up, straddling Karlie underneath her thighs. 

“What is it?” Karlie asks as she eyes the little box curiously, trying to not get too distracted by the feeling of Taylor’s warm skin on her own.

“Just a toy,” Taylor replies nonchalantly, winking seductively at Karlie. 

Soon enough, Karlie is squirming underneath her, overwhelmed with pleasure as she is taken over the edge.

***

About an hour later, Karlie suddenly remembers the pizza they ordered. She’s lying in Taylor’s arms watching Friends when she’s reminded by her growling stomach.

“Shit!” she exclaims and practically jumps out of bed, leaving a confused Taylor in bed.

“What?” 

“I completely forgot about the pizza and our phones are downstairs and oh God, I hope they didn’t hear us.” The sound of Taylor’s laughter follows her around the room as she tries to find a shirt and some panties.

“Karlie…” Taylor says in between fits of laughter, “they probably just left the pizza by the door and left. This place is huge and besides, I think we were mostly done by the time they would have been back with the pizza anyway.” She winks at Karlie before turning back to the TV, her hand absentmindedly stroking Olivia who had jumped into the bed as Karlie got out. 

“How can you be so calm about them potentially hearing us?” 

“I just figure that if they heard us today, it wouldn’t have been the first time. We have been doing this for a few years now, remember?”

A faint blush creeps into Karlie’s cheeks as she smiles. “I guess you’re right,” she says after a few seconds. “Alright, I’ll be right back.”

The sound of the TV follows her down the hallway, around the corner and down the stairs. A faint smell of pizza greets her in the foyer and she turns the corner to find two large pizzas sitting on the table by the door. From the living room she can hear the faint ringtone of Taylor’s phone and she wonders just how many missed calls the two of them have right now, but she doesn’t want to check. They need some alone time.

She grabs the pizzas and stop by the kitchen to grab two beers from the fridge before she ventures back upstairs to the bedroom.

“Are they still hot?” Taylor asks the moment she walks through the door, and Karlie nods. 

“Yeah, I think so.”

“Good,” Taylor says with a huge grin. She grabs the beer Karlie’s handing her and puts it on the bedside table before she accepts the two pizza boxes, laying them out on the bed while Karlie undresses again.

Soon after, they’re back in each other’s arms under the covers, ready to enjoy the rest of the night in bed.

***

Three days later, Karlie nearly trips over Meredith on her way to open the door for her party guests. The cat seems to have decided that four people is four people too many for one little cat to deal with and she runs quickly away from them through Karlie’s legs, making Karlie stumble and nearly crash into a wall. 

“Jesus fuck,” she mutters as she saves herself from faceplanting into the wall. She glares at the cat zooming out of view and grumbles under her breath for a second before continuing.

“Are you okay, babe?” Taylor calls from the living room.

“Yeah, Meredith just tried to kill me. It’s all good.”

She listens to Taylor’s laughter as she opens the door, finding Lily, Josh and Carla standing outside.

“Hey guys!” she greets them happily, giving out hugs to everyone, including Carla. “It is so nice to meet you,” she says to her and Carla smiles in reply.

“The paparazzi outside are insane right now,” Lily says as she hangs her jacket on a hanger. “I’ve never seen so many of them camped out in front of this place, ever.”

“Yeah, it’s been crazy these past few days,” Karlie shrugs, “but I guess it’s not really surprising. We did expect it to happen.”

“I just wish they weren’t so vocal. Poor Josh and Carla here got some really heavy fire.”

Karlie gives Josh a sympathetic look. “Sorry,” she whispers to him, wishing he didn’t have to suffer through paparazzi questions because of her.

He puts his hand on her shoulder and gives it a small squeeze. “I can handle myself, Karlie, you know that. Don’t apologize.” 

“I really feel like I should apologize to you though,” she says and turns towards Carla. “I’m really sorry you got pulled into all of this. It was never my intention to get other people wrapped up in this drama, but I’m really glad you decided Josh was worth sticking around for. He’s a great guy and he deserves to be happy.”

Carla nervously picks on her fingers while she answers. “I won’t lie, I didn’t quite believe him when he told me the story, but then I realized he was obviously telling the truth. I did some googling and he sort of filled in the gaps for me whenever I had questions.” When Karlie looks mildly alarmed, her eyes flitting nervously from Carla to Josh and back to Carla, Carla quickly explains. “Don’t worry, he didn’t tell me you were dating Taylor. Her name was definitely kept out of it at all times, but I can’t say I was surprised when I read the news on Wednesday.”

Karlie can feel the relief spread through her as Carla explains and she feels like her shoulders are ten times lighter than they were a moment ago. She holds out her arm and gestures for Carla to follow her. “Come,” she says, “let me show you around this place, and then of course you have to meet Taylor. I think you’ll like her.” 

Behind Carla, Karlie can see Josh smiling happily and she winks at him before turning her focus back on Carla.

*** 

Quiet sniffles wake Karlie up the next morning and it takes her a few moments to realize they’re coming from Taylor. She sits up quickly and turns around to find her lying with her back towards Karlie, her knees tucked up into her chest. Seeing Taylor like that makes Karlie feel like her heart is shattering into a million pieces, and she wraps her arm around Taylor, pulling her close. 

When she feels Karlie’s arm around her, Taylor turns around to look into Karlie’s eyes. “I’m sorry for waking you,” she mutters, her voice raw and broken with crying, before she buries her face in Karlie’s chest.

“Shhh,” Karlie soothes as she holds Taylor tightly, occasionally pressing her lips lightly down on Taylor’s head. Looking around, Karlie notices Taylor’s macbook sitting at the foot of the bed. It’s turned itself off so Karlie can only imagine what it is Taylor has been looking at but she knows it’s nothing good. 

She can feel herself getting angry at the entire situation and takes a long, deep breath to calm herself down. Something needs to be done.

***

A few hours later, after having talked to Penni, Tree and Andrea, Karlie grabs her biggest suitcase and drags it down the hallway and down the stairs. Leaving it in the foyer for a moment, she hunts down the cats and places them into their respective carriers before she goes to find Taylor in the den behind the kitchen. 

Taylor looks up at her when she enters and gives her a small smile. She’s seemingly calmed down from before, but Karlie can feel the sadness radiating from her girlfriend, threatening to bring them both down.

“Grab your passport,” she says and flashes Taylor a smile. “We’re leaving.” 

Taylor doesn’t respond but she gets up from where she’s sitting. Her lips graze Karlie’s cheek as she walks past her, and Karlie is sure she can see the relief in Taylor’s eyes as she stops in the doorway, looking back at her with a smile on her face. 

“Are you coming?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys!
> 
> So I'm sorry it took so long to get this chapter out. The past few weeks were odd and this chapter was difficult to write for some reason, but it's here and I hope you will like it!  
> My beta reader/editor will be away on holidays until the 11th, so the next chapter won't be out until she's back, but I'll have fun writing it while she's off enjoying the sun. (Am I jealous? Yes. Definitely.)


	33. Chapter 33

The jet is halfway between the Bahamas and the US when Karlie glances out the window, taking in the beautiful sunset painting a picture on the horizon. They left Musha Cay in the early evening after a beautiful and relaxing week away from their crazy daily lives, and now, nearly two hours later, Karlie already misses the calm waves on the beach and the particular kind of quiet that can only be found in remote places.

Taylor is resting in Karlie’s arms, seemingly lost in an episode of SVU playing on the laptop sitting on the table in front of them. Her fingers play idly with Karlie’s hand, alternately stroking it and tapping it.

Karlie gazes lovingly at her girlfriend, taking in the sight of her. She’s been so relaxed this week, gotten some color on her skin and even gained a few pounds, looking refreshed and healthy, and it makes Karlie smile. Taking this trip has been the best idea she’s had all year. If only it could last even longer.

“I think we should go to Nashville tomorrow,” Taylor suddenly says, tilting her head upwards to look at Karlie.

Smugly, Karlie pushes the little button on the side of their seats, connecting them to the cockpit. “Marco, can you please inform Taylor where we are currently headed?”

“Nashville, ma’am,” Marco replies and Karlie grins.

When Taylor sits up straight and looks at her incredulously, Karlie smiles back at her. “I already arranged to have us taken straight to Nashville. The interview airs tomorrow and I know you would want to be with your mom when we watch it.”

Tears are welling up in Taylor’s eyes and she blinks them away. “Thank you,” she whispers, “thank you for all of this, Nashville and Musha Cay and for just being attentive and beautiful and perfect.” She places her soft lips gently on Karlie’s for a moment before she puts her cheek down on Karlie’s shoulder, holding her tight. “What about the cats?” she mumbles after a moment, but she keeps her body pressed up against Karlie’s, refusing to let go.

“Austin was under strict orders to pick them up yesterday, so I would assume they are already waiting for us.”

“I miss them,” Taylor murmurs softly, finally breaking their embrace. She wipes her face on her sleeve and gives Karlie a smile before she turns around again, settling in with her head resting on Karlie’s chest again.

“I know, babe. We’ll see them soon.”

***

The following afternoon, Karlie is sitting on Andrea’s couch with Taylor on one side and Andrea’s huge dog Kitty on the other, waiting for Ellen to start. Taylor is lazily stuffing her face with whipped cream from a can, causing the big dog to reach across Karlie and attempt to lick Taylor’s face.

“Stop it,” she yells at the dog, her mouth full of cream. 

Kitty looks so sad from being denied whipped cream that Karlie reaches out to scratch behind her ears. “Look at this cutie,” Karlie says, “what did she ever do to you?”

Taylor looks Karlie deep into her eyes and holds her gaze. “So many things, Karlie, oh, so many things.” Not averting her eyes from Karlie’s, she stuffs another mouthful of cream into her mouth.

Staring at her incredulously for a few moments, Karlie laughs, causing Taylor to reveal a huge grin. 

“After she got Meredith, she suddenly hated dogs,” Andrea says with a laugh, carrying a steaming mug of coffee in one hand and a dog treat in the other. 

“I don’t hate them,” Taylor protests, “they’re just too up in my face all the time. It’s gross.”

“Tell that to your poor dog that you abandoned here,” Andrea says jokingly and smooches to Kitty to get her attention. “Hey darling, look what I’ve got,” she tells the dog who immediately jumps over to her to eat the treat before lying down on the floor by her feet.

“I did not abandon him,” Taylor mumbles, “it just made more sense for him to stay here and live out his days with someone who would actually have time for him.”

The light banter between mother and daughter makes Karlie laugh, but she’s interrupted when Taylor suddenly unmutes the TV.

A hand intertwines with her own as Ellen’s crowd quietens down and the cameras fixate on Ellen. 

“About a month ago, I was contacted by a dear friend of mine. You might have seen this picture of her the past couple of weeks.” A photo of Taylor and Karlie kissing in Central Park appears on the screen behind Ellen as she continues talking. “If you don’t already know, that's Taylor Swift and the lucky girl in the picture is Karlie Kloss, model, entrepreneur, ridiculously tall and the sweetest person you’ll ever meet. When Taylor contacted me, she told me she had a story she wanted to tell the world, something she had never spoken about before, and asked if she could tell it here on my show. Taylor is a sweetheart through and through, so I couldn’t say no to that, now could I? Here is what she had to say.”

As the prerecorded interview airs, there’s an anxious silence in the room. Taylor leans closer to Karlie, practically lying in her arms, concentrating on everything on the screen. Her fingers tap nervously on the back of Karlie’s hand, making Karlie pull Taylor even closer to press her lips down onto her forehead. 

Holding Taylor close, she pays attention to how Andrea reacts to the tell-all; the way her gaze flickers towards Taylor when her past is brought up, how her eyes glaze over during Taylor’s reason for coming out. It makes Karlie think back on the conversation they had last December, when Andrea finally told them how she understood the limits she had put on Taylor, and she realizes how many emotions must be running through Andrea’s mind right now.

As the interview comes to an end, Karlie can feel Taylor trembling in her arms. She rubs her hand over Taylor’s arm to give her some strength, and for the first time during the segment, Taylor tears her eyes away from the screen to look at Karlie, a small smile on her face. “You’re so brave,” Karlie whispers to her right before Taylor turn her eyes back to the TV.

The cheering at the end of the interview is endless and overwhelming. Eventually Ellen gets her crowd to quieten down and the camera zooms in on her yet again. “Taylor,” she says, looking directly into the camera in front of her, “I don’t think I have the words to accurately express just how proud I am right now. By doing what you just did, you have helped so many young people to come to terms with their own sexuality. I know the times ahead might be tough, but you’re tougher. Be brave, live your life and we’ll talk soon.”

Andrea mutes the TV and turns towards Taylor. She looks down onto her hands for a second, clearly trying to find the words to say. Taylor is still trembling in Karlie’s arms, but the trembling has lessened and her breathing is deeper. A lone tear has run down her cheek and she quickly dries it with her sleeve before she gets up to sit next to her mother. As soon as she sits down, she wraps her arms around her mother and buries her face in her hair. “I’m so proud of you,” Andrea says softly, her hand stroking Taylor’s back. “I have never been prouder. You’re so brave, my sweetheart, so brave, and I love you.”

“I love you too, mom,” Taylor replies so quietly that Karlie can barely hear it. 

Deciding to give the two some space, Karlie gets up and walks towards the kitchen, her hand brushing over Taylor’s shoulder as she passes.

***

After a few days of trying to catch a break between calls, Taylor and Karlie are out eating dinner with Scott and Andrea. The restaurant is busy tonight, no doubt due to it being a Friday evening, but they get a table towards the back, as well as two tables for Taylor’s security, providing them with some sense of privacy.

Both girls are in the middle of checking out the wine menu when they hear someone approach the security guys, asking if she could maybe get to chat with Taylor for just a few seconds. The guys, doing their job, are about to tell her to please move along and give them some space when Taylor lets out a small gasp and a sound that sounds vaguely like the letter m. 

Karlie stares at her quizzically for a short second, letting her eyes run over the woman quickly before looking back at Taylor. Taylor looks like she’s seen a ghost and when their eyes meet, she gulps, clearly struggling to find her voice.

“Guys, it’s okay. Let her through.”

“Wow, your security detail is intimidating,” she says and chuckles nervously, walking up to the table. She doesn’t pull up a chair and ends up standing by the table, indicating she’s not planning on staying long. “Hi.”

Karlie can’t help but take in the sight of this woman. With her strawberry blonde hair, beautiful eyes, friendly demeanor and a casually chic outfit, she looks like she’s taken directly out of some Midwestern small town, and Karlie is absolutely certain she’s seen her before somewhere, but where?

“Hi,” Taylor breathes before clearing her throat, not taking her eyes off of the woman for a second. 

“I’m really sorry to interrupt your evening like this, but I couldn’t believe my eyes when I saw you walked in. I watched your interview on Ellen the other day and I’ve been considering writing you and then suddenly you’re here and I’m here and… I’m sorry, I’m rambling.” She laughs nervously and it brings out a small smile on Taylor’s face. 

Taylor looks like she’s in a daze for few awkward, silent seconds until she manages to pull herself out of it. “No, that’s fine,” she says quickly and turns to look at Karlie. “This is Karlie, my girlfriend. And you already know my parents.”

“Of course", the woman says and nods to them, getting curt nods in reply. She reaches out a hand to Karlie. “It’s so lovely to meet you, Karlie. I’m Emily.”

 _Oh_ , Karlie thinks and almost makes the entire encounter even more awkward by failing to respond, but she manages to catch herself just in time. “Hi, I’m Karlie.”

Another awkward silence engulfs them and Emily shifts uncomfortably where she stands. “I won’t stay, but Taylor, I saw your TV interview and,” she reaches into her purse, pulling out a business card, “if you’d be up for it, I’d love to meet up to talk sometime.” She hands Taylor the card, who takes it with stunned silence. “I hope you’ll have a good night,” she says and with a smile she’s turned around and walks away from them with quick steps.

Karlie stares at Taylor, who blinks a few times, clearly not quite yet having processed what just happened.

“I need a drink,” Taylor says eventually and looks at her mother with wide eyes.

“Me too,” Andrea says softly.

Karlie just watches Emily walk away, wondering what in the world just happened.

***

The following evening, Karlie is in the kitchen baking cookies. After last night’s surprise visit from Taylor’s ex-girlfriend, she’s decided they need some delicious comfort food and baking cookies always cheers her up.

She’s just about to scoop them onto the baking tray when Taylor walks in and sits down on the bar stool behind her, putting her face in her hands and sighing loudly. 

Putting the bowl of cookie dough down on the counter, Karlie walks over to her and wraps her arms around Taylor’s shoulders. She kisses her cheek lightly before giving her a soft cuddle.

“I don’t know what to do, Kar,” Taylor says quietly. 

Taylor sounds so broken and confused that Karlie can feel her insides shatter. She never likes it when her girl is sad, but this is different somehow; it’s nostalgia and Karlie knows she cannot completely grasp exactly what it is Taylor is feeling.

She pulls out another bar stool and sits down in front of Taylor, taking both of her hands in her own. “What do you want to do?” she asks quietly, meeting Taylor’s eyes comfortingly. 

Taylor diverts her gaze down onto her lap, clearly trying to form some coherent thoughts. “I…” she starts, but her voice trails off and she sighs. “I really don’t know, Karlie. On the one hand I want to take her up on her offer and meet up, talk about things, but on the other, it’s been so long… I don’t know if it’s wise to even bring those issues up again. What purpose would it serve?”

“Considering how you reacted when she showed up, and how tense you’ve been all day, I think the purpose would be to clean the air, so to speak. I know you, Tay, so I know that you won’t be able to let this go again until you’ve spoken to her.”

Taylor sighs again, but this time she meets Karlie’s gaze. “Won’t you think it’s weird if I meet up with her though? It can’t exactly be your wildest dream come true to have your girlfriend hang out with her ex.”

“No,” Karlie laughs, “it’s not exactly in my list of ‘top 10 favorite things my girlfriend wants to do’ but I know as much as you do that you need to do this. And I’m okay with it, really.” She squeezes Taylor’s hands as reassurance and looks into her blue eyes, trying to convey that she actually, truly means it. When Taylor only responds by looking at her skeptically, she continues. “Really, Taylor. Pick up the phone and call her. You should do this.”

Mulling it over, Taylor eventually nods. “Okay…” she says with a sigh and gets up, giving Karlie a kiss on the cheek. “Why is it you always know what I need?”

Getting up to embrace her girlfriend, Karlie chuckles lightly. “It’s because I’m magical.”

“You are,” Taylor murmurs in agreement, her face pressed into Karlie’s chest. “I love you.”

“I love you too, princess.”


	34. Chapter 33b - Taylor's POV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys. 
> 
> I named this chapter 33b because it starts directly after 33, but it's happening at the same time as the start of 34 (which you'll get later).  
> As you know, this story is Karlie's story but with recent happening, I felt that a chapter from Taylor's point of view was necessary, mostly because I REALLY wanted explore her chat with Emily, and that sort of had to happen without Karlie present. Hope you'll like it!

Taylor is sitting in her empty apartment, waiting for security to let her know she’s got company. She smooths her skirt yet another time, something she’s been doing continuously for the past fifteen minutes since Karlie walked out the door to spend a few hours with Andrea. It had been her idea that Taylor invite Emily over to the apartment and it seemed like a good idea at the time, but right now Taylor isn’t so sure anymore. She takes a deep breath, trying to calm her nerves but failing miserably, the butterflies in her stomach multiplying by the second.

A chime on her phone alerts her that her company has arrived and minutes later the doorbell rings. “Get it together,” she whispers to herself as she gets up to open the door.

She’s greeted by a whiff of perfume a fraction of a second before she sees the girl standing on the other side of the door. “Hi,” she says with a cautious smile, and gets a hello in return. “Please, come on in.”

She takes Emily’s jacket with trembling hands, feeling her heart race just a little. 

“You have a nice place,” Emily says to break the silence. She fiddles with her hands, looking nervously around, her eyes flitting from one thing to the next, growing wider and wider until Taylor starts wondering if they’re going to pop out of her head soon.

“Can I get you anything?” Taylor asks and motions for Emily to follow her further into the apartment.

“Just water, thanks.” She gives Taylor a small smile and Taylor’s heart jolts a little. She used to be able to get lost in that smile.

Shaking the thought away, she disappears into the kitchen for a while to fill up two glasses of water that she carries with her back to the living room. She sits down in one of the chairs and watches Emily walk around the room, looking at everything. 

The room is filled with a tense silence. Emily picks up a few pictures of Taylor and Karlie and puts them back down after a few seconds before picking up the next one. Watching her, Taylor has so many words stuck in her throat; for someone who makes her living writing pretty words, she sure seems to lack them when it counts. 

“You guys look really happy together,” Emily says suddenly, breaking the silence. She looks over at Taylor, a framed photograph from the Big Sur trip in her hand, her other hand resting on her stomach.  


Taylor smiles back at her. “Thank you,” she says just as her eyes notices how Emily’s thumb is subtly caressing her stomach. _Oh_ , she thinks. “You’re pregnant!” The second the words are out of her mouth, she kicks herself internally. _Stupid, stupid, stupid_.

“Oh,” Emily says and looks down on her stomach. “Yeah, I am.” She looks back up at Taylor with a smile on her face, but the smile doesn’t reach her eyes. There’s a sadness in them that Taylor can’t figure out.

“Congrats,” Taylor says, trying to be enthusiastic, but it falls a little flat due to the sadness Taylor can read on Emily’s face. “Is it your first?”

“No,” she says, her smile finally reaching her eyes, “I have a daughter, Madison. She’s almost three. This one,” she looks down at her stomach again, slowly running her hand over it, “is a boy. We’re naming him Robbie, after…”

“…your mother,” Taylor says, finishing her sentence. She’s hit with a memory of sitting in Emily’s parents’ back yard one summer evening drinking coke and playing cards with her parents, and she can’t keep herself from smiling. “How is she?”

Emily tenses at the question and turns away again, placing the photograph she’s been holding back on the shelf where it originally sat. “She’s dying,” she says quietly, her words barely more than a whisper.

The words hit Taylor like a punch to the stomach. She feels the pressure of tears welling up into her eyes, and she blinks them away quickly as she meets Emily’s gaze again. “I’m sorry,” she manages to say, and Emily nods curtly before she moves to a chair opposite Taylor’s and sits down.

“I wasn’t going to bring it up this early in the conversation,” she says and sighs, rubbing her face. “I was going to leave it for later. There are just so many things I wanted to say first, things I’ve thought about for years, things I thought I would never get to say to you because it wouldn’t be wise to. And then…” she meets Taylor’s stare head on, “you suddenly came out. I had already started writing you a letter because of this whole thing with mom, because I figured you would want to know, and then one night I was watching TV with Brad, my husband, and the Ellen ad came on about her interviewing you, and he knows I used to work with you so he immediately scheduled it for recording since he knew we would both be at work, and… it was surreal. I honestly didn’t expect to see that.”

“Does he know? About us?”

“No,” Emily says, “I never told anyone, just like we agreed on. The only people who know are the people who knew back then. No one’s ever talked about it though. There was just some kind of mutual agreement of never mentioning it ever again.”

“I know what you mean.” Taylor doesn’t know what else to say to that. She’s so nervous, her heart is beating so loudly it’s practically screaming in her ears and she secretly wonders if Emily can hear it, but shoves that thought away. Impossible, she concludes and takes a deep breath, trying to calm herself.

“Leaving you was the hardest thing I’ve ever done,” Emily says suddenly. “I tried telling myself that we should never have gotten together in the first place. It was never my intention to woo you, I should have known better than to fall for you. I was the older one, I should have said no.”

“And how did that go for you?”

“Exactly as well as expected – not well at all. I loved you, you know, and I hated that we couldn’t be together. But I understood, I wanted the best for you and I wanted you to succeed.”

“I don’t think either of us expected it would end up like this,” Taylor says and gesticulates around the room. 

“No,” Emily chuckles, “but I’m glad it did. Thank you for Breathe by the way. I know you’ve never confirmed it’s about me but you wouldn’t have either.”

“No, I wouldn’t have,” Taylor says, a small smile on her face. “You’re welcome though.”

“Is it true you’ve never performed it?”

“Yeah.”

“Why?” 

“It never felt right,” Taylor says with a shrug. “It is such a personal song. I wasn’t sure if you would be okay with it, if I would be okay with it.”

“I’m flattered that you take my potential feelings on the matter into consideration, but I’m not sure if I should have that right. I’m not a part of your life anymore, or at least I haven’t been for a very long time, and you don’t owe me anything. I hope you know that I’m not here to win you back or anything; I don’t want to cause a rift between you and Karlie in any way.”

“I know that and she knows that. She’s the one who told me we should do this, have this chat. She understands.”

“That’s really great, Taylor,” Emily says with a smile. There’s kindness showing on her face and she suddenly seems calmer, happier, than she was just moments ago. “She seems wonderful, she really does. The way you light up when you talk about her, it’s incredible to watch. It’s like she’s the only thing you see, like she’s your entire world.”

“She’s amazing,” Taylor murmurs happily, not able to keep the grin off her face.

“Are you going to marry her?”

“I… err, what?” Taylor splutters, feeling her cheeks redden with embarrassment. 

“You should,” Emily says and shrugs, “Give your mother some grandchildren.”

Taylor laughs nervously, fiddling with her fingers as a silence spreads throughout the room. 

“I wish my mom would get to meet Robbie,” Emily says eventually, breaking the silence. The sadness in her voice tears Taylor’s insides in two and she feels a sudden urge to reach out and hug the girl. “She’s been asking for you.”

“Really?” 

“Yeah… I think she wants to see you, although she’s a bit out of it so I’m not sure if she’s just reminiscing or if she’s actually asking to see you. I don’t expect you to but…”

“Of course I’ll go see her. You don’t even have to ask.”

A small smile filled with relief forms on Emily’s face. “Thank you,” she says.

As Taylor smiles back at her, her brain frantically tries to figure out a way to ask what condition Emily’s mother has, but the words coming out of her mouth are weird splutters and incoherent sentences. “What is she… I mean, what.. err…”

“Cancer,” Emily just says in a way that tells Taylor she’s had to tell countless people before. “Brain tumor.” 

“Oh…” Taylor says, “I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay,” Emily replies and smiles again, “it’s been a long time coming.”

“I really am sorry though. Not just for this, but for everything.” 

“I know. I’m honestly just glad your parents didn’t have me arrested for having sex with a minor,” Emily chuckles, clearly trying to lighten the mood a little. “Don’t think that would have gone so well with my law degree…”

“They wouldn’t have dared doing that, I would never have forgiven them. It took me a while to even forgive them for breaking us apart, even though I understood why they did it.” Taylor sighs and looks away for a moment before she forces herself to meet Emily’s gaze again. “I spent a long time regretting not having fought for you, and probably an equal amount of time trying to convince myself that not fighting for you, for us, was the right thing to do. I know now that I probably wouldn’t be where I am today if we had still been together, and I am okay with that; I would never have met Karlie. But… I really loved you and I think a part of me still does.”

“I don’t think that will ever go away,” Emily says quietly, “I still get this intense feeling of wanting to protect you whenever someone says anything stupid and offensive about you. And then, sometimes at night when Brad is asleep, I think back on our silly 2am laughing fits and realize I miss those times. But I have no regrets other than wishing we would have at least kept in touch. I miss you, you know. You were my best friend.”

The honesty in her words warms Taylor’s heart and happy memories of them soar through her head, making her smile. She gets up from her chair and walks the few steps over to stand next to Emily. “I’m going to hug you now,” she announces. Right before she leans in to do it, she sees the pleasantly surprised expression on Emily’s face and knows she made the right decision.

It’s a brief hug, one of those slightly awkward ones where you don’t really know where to put your arms or just how tight you should press your body up to theirs, but it’s still nice. Emily smells of daisies and a hint of the apple blossom body wash Taylor used to be obsessed with a few years back, and another flash of memories floods her mind: the two of them dancing in the living room, the room filled with scented candles; the two of them giggling hysterically on the tour bus, having just doused some poor innocent bystander with body spray. 

“We should keep in touch this time,” Taylor catches herself saying once some personal space has been reinstated. 

In the pit of her stomach warmth starts spreading slowly through her body, letting her know she actually means it, and in the chair opposite hers, the grin on Emily’s face lets her know those words were the right ones to say out loud.


	35. Chapter 34

“Do you mind if I use the kitchen?” 

Karlie is sitting on the floor in front of the TV, playing with Kitty, trying to keep her mind from going crazy when the words practically fall out of her mouth. The look on Andrea’s face is full of surprise, but she nods and smiles.

“Go right ahead.”

She gets up from the floor, leaving the curious dog behind as she ventures into the kitchen. Opening all the cabinets, she finds a couple of bowls, spoons, measuring cups and a large amount of ingredients that she takes out and spreads out on the kitchen counter. Not really sure what to make, she stares at them for a while waiting for inspiration.

She gazes at the clock, trying to figure out how much time she has to work with when it hits her: brownies. She wants brownies. They’re perfect – gooey, chocolatey, and just the right amount of comfort that a girl needs when her girlfriend is spending time with her ex-girlfriend. 

Her mind wanders as she pour ingredients into a bowl, following a recipe she’s made so many times she no longer has to think about it in order to get it right. Instead she thinks about Taylor: the sound of her voice trying to explain the confusion she felt after Emily showed up; the painful look in her eyes conveying emotions she didn’t know how to put into words; the mixture of relief and anxiety flashing across her face as Karlie practically gave her permission to go ahead and meet up with Emily.

Karlie is so lost in her thoughts that she doesn’t realize Andrea has come up behind her, and she jumps and lets out a loud yelp as Andrea puts her hand on Karlie’s shoulder.

“I think you’ve whisked that batter enough, darling,” she says soothingly, causing Karlie to glance down into the bowl. 

“Oh,” she mutters as she realizes she’s whisking batter that’s been finished for what seems to be a while. 

Andrea hands her a buttered pan for the batter and meets her eyes with a knowing look on her face. “You’re worried, aren’t you?” she asks softly and Karlie looks away.

She pours the batter in while she thinks about the question. Is she worried? “Yes,” she grudgingly admits after a while, “or… no, not really worried. I just… I don’t know.” She pops the pan into the oven and stands up with a sigh. 

Andrea waits patiently for her to continue, and Karlie suddenly realizes how similar Taylor is to her mother. “You know,” she says, “Taylor is just like you. She, too, waits for me to think about what I need to say. I’m not as good with words as she is, I can’t describe my feelings in the same way that she can and that can be very frustrating sometimes. Like now. But to be honest, I don’t really like the fact that they’re alone together right now. I understand that she needed to do it and I was the one who told her to do it, but…”

“But she’s an intruder in your life,” Andrea finishes her sentence for her.

“Yes,” Karlie admits and all but falls down onto the closest chair, placing her head in her hands. 

Andrea walks over to her and strokes her back softly, the way only a mother can do. 

“I know it probably doesn’t help,” she starts, “but I feel like maybe this would have been prevented if Taylor’s father and I hadn’t been so adamant on breaking them up and keeping them apart. Maybe if they had gotten to at least talk things through then things would be different for you now.”

“…or maybe they wouldn’t,” Karlie says.

“That is true, maybe they wouldn’t.”

Karlie sighs loudly before looking up into Andrea’s kind eyes. “I feel like I somehow should have seen this coming. I have always known Taylor has exes, several of them; I’ve even met a few of them. But I never expected Emily to come along. I know she’s special to Taylor, her first love, and… I guess I feel like I can’t really compete with that.” As she says the words out loud, she feels defeated and tired, like she really can’t compete with any of Taylor’s exes.

“Karlie…” Andrea says calmly, putting Karlie’s hand in her own. “Don’t think like that. Deep down, you know that what you and Taylor have is special. It’s real and it’s strong and you have nothing to worry about. Do you trust her?”

“Of course I do,” Karlie immediately replies, “I don’t think I’ve ever trusted anyone as much as I trust her.”

“Then you know there’s absolutely nothing to worry about,” Andrea says and smiles kindly at Karlie. “I still stand by what I said a while back, just so you know: Out of everyone Taylor has ever brought home, you’re my favorite.”

The words warm Karlie’s heart and she can’t help but smile a little. “Thank you,” she whispers, not really sure what else to respond with.

“You’re very welcome, darling,” Andrea says and pulls her into a hug. “Now, set a timer for those brownies and come join me in the living room, okay?”

***

When Karlie walks through the door of Taylor’s apartment a few hours later, Taylor comes out to greet her. Karlie notices straight away that there’s a smile on her face, and she seems calmer, more composed, than she had been when Karlie left for Andrea’s. 

“Hey,” she says and throws her keys onto the table by the door. She wants to ask how their chat went but at the same time she doesn’t want to know, that jealous and uncomfortable feeling inside of her still sticking its claws in deep, refusing to leave.

Instead of saying anything, Taylor immediately goes in for an embrace, holding Karlie tight. “Thank you,” she whispers into Karlie’s ear, and Karlie immediately feels guilty.

“For what?” she asks, trying to feign some sort of ignorance to prevent herself from saying something stupid.

“You know what for,” Taylor says and breaks the hug. She caresses Karlie’s cheek softly, gazing into Karlie’s eyes with so much love that Karlie feels even worse. How can she feel upset about Taylor and Emily talking when this is what she comes home to?

Taylor takes her hand and leads her into the living room where they sit down. She’s already well into a recap of the night’s events when she suddenly stops and looks questioningly at Karlie. “What’s wrong?” she asks, a layer of concern coating her words.

Karlie looks away and takes a deep breath. “It’s nothing,” she starts, “stupid, really…”

“Come on,” Taylor urges her, “I can tell something’s bothering you.”

When Karlie still doesn’t say anything, Taylor continues. “If you won’t tell me what it is, I can’t help you feel better and if I can’t help you feel better, you’ll be grumpy and irritated and we’ll end up fighting, and I would really like to not fight, so please. Tell me what’s wrong.”

Karlie shifts in her seat and tries to collect her thoughts before she opens her mouth. “It’s stupid,” she starts with, “but I’ve spent the entire time at your mom’s feeling stupid and jealous and upset, and I know that is ridiculous because I’m the one who urged you to meet up with Emily and talk to her because I know how much you needed to, and now I feel ridiculous because I could see the immediate effect it’s had on you and I feel like I’m ruining that by telling you all this, but…” She takes another breath and forces herself to meet Taylor’s gaze before she continues. Taylor looks concerned, but she can read understanding on her face and she takes that as confirmation to keep going. “I know that she was your first love, and I obviously understand that you needed to talk things through with her, which is why I suggested you should do it in the first place, but I’ve never loved anyone before you, you are _my_ first love, and I guess I’m just scared that she owns a part of you that I will never own. And… yeah.”

“Oh, Karlie…” Taylor says comfortingly and grabs her hand, pulling Karlie a little closer. “Even if that’s true, even if she always will have a place in my heart, there is absolutely nothing in this world that would change how I feel about you. You and I, we belong, you know? I have never felt as complete as I do when I’m with you. Seeing her brought back a lot of memories, but if this meeting did anything at all, it showed me that I’m truly over her. Compared to you, she’s but a speck of dust and you’re the entire night sky. You’re the sunshine and she’s nothing more than a broken old lamp that can’t be fixed.”

As she listens to Taylor’s words, it’s like Karlie’s insecurities seep away in an instant, and she laughs. “She’s but a speck of dust? Really, Taylor?”

A faint blush creeps into Taylor’s cheeks. “Oh, you know what I mean. My point is, you’re my entire world and you have nothing to worry about.”

Karlie scrunches her nose as she looks at Taylor. “You’re disgusting,” she grimaces, “tell me again why I like you?”

Taylor rolls her eyes lovingly and inches closer to Karlie. Her hand meets Karlie’s cheek in less than a second, caressing it softly as she brings Karlie’s face down to her own. “Because I’m adorable and funny, and also because I do this,” she says seductively and puts her lips on Karlie’s, kissing her slowly but firmly, making Karlie’s heart flutter a little bit inside.

Breaking away from the kiss, Karlie puts her head on Taylor’s shoulder and holds her close. “You’re absolutely right,” she murmurs after a while, “that is exactly why I like you.”

Taylor moves her hands to Karlie’s shoulders and holds them apart so she can look into Karlie’s eyes. “Are you feeling a little better now? Can I tell you about my night or would you rather I wait until tomorrow?” 

“No, it’s okay,” Karlie says and smiles a little. “I’m okay now, you can talk.”

“I love you, you know.”

“I know,” Karlie replies and gives Taylor a soft kiss. “I love you too.”

Taylor strokes Karlie’s hand while she starts telling Karlie about everything her and Emily talked about. 

“She told me her mother has cancer,” Taylor says and Karlie notices the shift in her voice, how it trembles just a little when she says it, and she gives Taylor’s hand a comforting squeeze. 

“I’m sorry,” she says, “will she be okay?”

“No…” Taylor says and sighs. “My heart really bleeds for Emily. I don’t think either of us ever expected something like this happening when we were younger, you know? And it really hits a little too close to home.” She flashes Karlie a look filled with pain before she continues. “Apparently she doesn’t have long and she’s been asking to see me. I told Emily that of course I’ll go see her but to be honest, I’m a little scared.”

“I can understand that, but I think it’s a really nice thing that you’re going to do it. Have you decided on when you’re going?”

“We talked about maybe doing it tomorrow. The sooner, the better.”

“Do you want me to come along?”

“No,” Taylor says with a soft smile on her face, “but you’re sweet for offering to come. Do you think you’ll be okay hanging out here for a few hours?”

“You know that we live together, right?” Karlie laughs.

Grinning sheepishly, Taylor nods. “I just mean here as in Nashville.”

“I’ll find something to do, I promise,” Karlie replies and pulls Taylor in for a kiss.

“Oh, and another thing…”

“Yes…” Karlie murmurs, not wanting Taylor to pull away to continue that sentence.

“Emily’s pregnant!”

Those words make Karlie pull away and stare incredulously into Taylor’s eyes. “What? That’s really great, I’m happy for her.”

“I am too, actually. She has another one as well, a three-year old. It seems like she’s really happy.”

“That’s good.” Karlie suddenly lets out a long yawn, and quickly looks at the time. “It’s getting really late. Do you mind if we continue this chat in bed? I’m tired.”

Taylor laughs and gets up, pulling Karlie up with her. “Alright, come on, sleepyhead. Let’s go.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi lovelies!  
> I'm so sorry it's been like 3 weeks since the last update. Things have been super hectic at work and I've been so physically and emotionally drained for a while now that I got to take some time off work to recharge. And, to top that, my beta has moved apartments so she's been super busy with painting and moving and work and so this was the earliest we could manage! 
> 
> Hopefully it won't be 3 weeks until the next update. I've already started writing it ;)


	36. Chapter 35

It’s barely 6am on a September morning, and the blaring alarm coming from Karlie’s nightstand is waking her up. She stretches and rubs her eyes before she rolls over to pull Taylor close for a snuggle, and realizes for the thirteenth morning in a row that Taylor isn’t there. With a sigh she rolls back onto her back and glances at the ceiling for a second, missing her girlfriend immensely. “Tonight,” she whispers to herself. The thought of having Taylor back in her arms immediately puts a smile on her face.

She gets up and walks downstairs to the kitchen to find her phone. Being back in her own apartment feels so strange, but since Taylor decided to spend a bit more time in Nashville, and Karlie had to go back to New York for work, she figured she might as well spend some time in her old apartment. 

Glancing around the kitchen, her mind wanders back to something that she’s been considering this past week: leasing out the apartment. The Tribeca apartment that Taylor owns is much larger; it’s what both of them consider their proper home these days, and it makes Karlie feel a little sorry for her quaint little space that never gets used. Maybe it really is time to get some life into it again.

She picks up her phone from the little round table in the corner and checks the time again. 6:12am. Taylor’s definitely still asleep; knowing her she probably just went to bed a couple of hours ago, but Karlie sends her a text anyway wishing her a good morning, knowing that Taylor will find it when she wakes up. Having successfully made sure Taylor will wake up with a smile on her face, she puts the phone back down and hurries to take a shower before getting started on the day’s tasks. 

***

Several hours later, Karlie walks through the doors of her favorite coffee place. It’s packed this afternoon, but she’s happy to just get her coffee to go, eager to get home and sort through some of her things. 

“Well, if it isn’t my favorite ray of sunshine!”

A familiar voice reaches Karlie’s ears before her eyes can find the person it belongs to, but when they do, she grins happily from ear to ear.

“Cammie, hi!”

“It’s been a long time, darling,” Cammie says, “how have you been? You haven’t found yourself a new place to get your coffee every morning, have you?”

“No,” Karlie laughs, “I’ve just been really busy lately. I don’t really stay around here anymore either, Taylor and I normally stay in her Tribeca apartment whenever we’re here.”

“See, I knew that girl you brought in last time was more than a friend.” Cammie winks and Karlie can feel herself blush a deep shade of crimson at the comment.

“Yeah, well…” Karlie mumbles, feeling slightly embarrassed, “I couldn’t really shout it from the rooftops back then, now could I?” She sticks her tongue out and Cammie laughs.

“No, I guess you couldn’t. What can I get for you today, sweetie?”

“I’ll take a grande almond milk latte, thanks.” 

“So where is Taylor today?”

“She’s back in Nashville with her mother. These past few weeks haven’t been so easy for her and I think she just needed to stay away for a bit while the storm blows over. She’s a lot more anonymous in Nashville than she is here so it’s really the best place for her to be right now. She’ll come back tonight though and I’m so excited to see her.”

“I bet you are,” Cammie smiles, “she seems like a good match for you, Karlie. I hope everything will pass soon so you can get back to normal again.”

“Thank you,” Karlie says happily, “although I think it will take a little while to establish normalcy again. It’s a whole new world for us now, you know? There won’t be so much hiding.”

“It makes sense that it will take a bit of time,” Cammie says while she finishes pouring the almond milk into Karlie’s coffee, “but now you’re free to take your relationship in the direction that you want to without anyone holding you back.” She puts a lid on the coffee and hands it over to Karlie, who happily accepts it, before continuing. “I wish you two all the luck in the world, honey, and I mean that. Don’t be a stranger, okay?”

“I won’t,” Karlie chuckles, “I promise.”

She strolls the few blocks back to her apartment, sipping her coffee and letting her mind wander to Taylor. It’s only a matter of hours until she can finally smell the faint scent of Taylor’s perfume and feel Taylor’s warm, soft skin against her own. The thought of it sends a jolt through her body and she smiles, taking another sip of her coffee as she crosses the street. Apart from making sure she’s not run over, she pays no attention to the world around her, completely lost in her own thoughts.

She’s just about to walk up to her gate when she realizes it’s blocked by a girl looking like she’s about 17. Karlie immediately halts in her tracks, puzzled as to why this girl is blocking her entrance.

“Hi!” the girl says enthusiastically. “You’re Karlie Kloss, right?”

“Uh,” Karlie just says. Her brain is still trying to process that she’s stopped dead in her tracks, but it only takes a second for it to catch up. “Yes, that’s me.”

“Awesome!” the girl says, as loudly as before. Before Karlie even knows what’s happening, the girl has snapped a picture of her on her phone and jumped into a car parked on the side of the road. “Bye!” she yells as she slams the door shut, the engine starting at the same time. A second later, the car is speeding off down the street, leaving Karlie behind, looking stunned. 

“What just happened?” Karlie mutters dazedly to herself before walking through the gate and into her building.

***

The arrivals area at the small airport Taylor’s flying into is almost eerily quiet at this time of night. Karlie’s sitting on a bench right around the corner from where Taylor and her security will appear in only a few minutes, and there are literally three other people sitting there waiting. Right outside, Jeff and Kevin are sitting in the car, just waiting to drive the girls back to their apartment.

Arranging to have Taylor’s security team pick them up outside of the airport instead of on the tarmac wasn’t easy, but Karlie successfully convinced them Taylor wouldn’t fire them for it. She just wanted to surprise Taylor and instructed them to please come up with some plausible excuse to tell Taylor when she would inquire about why the car wasn’t meeting her by the plane as usual. Now, sitting on that bench waiting for her, Karlie is feeling very pleased with herself for having managed to pull this off in such a short amount of time. 

“…don’t understand why there is literally no one outside working if they’re doing construction on the tarmac!”

Karlie laughs to herself when she hears the annoyance in Taylor’s words. Her fingers wrap themselves around the beautiful bouquet sitting next to her on the bench and she stands up just in time to see Taylor round the corner.

“I don’t know, m…” Bruce replies, but Taylor isn’t listening. 

The annoyed look on her face melts away completely as she spots Karlie standing in front of her, a bouquet of red roses and baby’s breath in her hand, and a grin on her face. Hurrying over to Karlie, she quickly puts Meredith’s cat carrier down on the floor, freeing up her hands. “Hi,” she breathes, and a single tear runs down her cheek. 

Karlie responds by pulling her in for a kiss, making sure not to squish the flowers in the process. She knows there are at least five pairs of eyes staring at them right now, but she can't find it in her to care about that right now. Kissing in public is an actual possibility for them now and it makes her happy. 

“I can tell you why there’s no one outside doing construction,” Karlie says cheekily once their initial greeting is done. “It was just an excuse I told the guys to make up so you would come through here and find me.” She holds out the bouquet to Taylor, who takes it and immediately buries her nose in it to take in the scent of the roses.

“Of course you did,” Taylor grimaces, “I wouldn’t have been so annoyed if I knew you were behind it. Thank you for the flowers, they’re beautiful.”

It’s almost like everything is frozen in time as the girls gaze lovingly at each other. Karlie looks at Taylor from head to toe when she suddenly realizes something is different about her. “You changed your hair again,” she says and carefully grabs a lock of Taylor’s hair, spinning it around her fingers. 

“I did,” Taylor says happily, “I got bored of the bleach blonde. Felt like a change was appropriate.”

“I won’t lie,” Karlie muses, “I’m a little sad you changed it back. You should have dyed it pink like we discussed.”

“We never discussed that,” Taylor laughs.

“We didn’t? Oh… I guess there is a possibility that I only discussed that part with myself.”

“That must be it.”

“You look pretty,” Karlie coos with a smile on her face. Her gaze is so focused on Taylor she almost misses the impatient looks coming from the guys standing behind Taylor. When she finally does notice after a few seconds, she can feel herself blush a similar shade of crimson as Taylor’s roses. “Err…” she mumbles, “we should probably go.” 

She bends down to pick up Meredith’s carrier in one hand and takes Taylor’s free hand in the other, leading her out to the car that’s still waiting for them.

***

A couple of hours later, Karlie is sitting in the kitchen, quietly watching Taylor trim the ends of the roses and put them into a delicate vase. 

“These flowers are really pretty,” Taylor says and takes a step back to admire her handiwork.

Karlie gets down from her bar stool and walks over to stand right behind Taylor, throwing an arm around her waist. “Not as pretty as you,” she murmurs into Taylor’s ear and Taylor giggles in reply. 

Karlie pulls Taylor towards her and leans in to plant a kiss on Taylor’s neck. The hand around her waist slips under the hem of her skirt, Karlie’s fingers dragging themselves slowly downwards until they find their destination and a soft gasp leaves Taylor’s mouth.

After a couple of seconds, Taylor tuts teasingly and pulls Karlie’s hand out. “Down, girl,” she says and laughs as she turns around to stand face to face with Karlie. “Take a girl to dinner first,” she teases and pulls Karlie in for a quick kiss before she steps away to grab the vase from the counter.

She takes the flowers into the living room and Karlie trails behind her. 

“I’m just happy you’re back,” Karlie says, gazing lovingly at Taylor.

“I can tell,” Taylor laughs and puts the flowers down on the coffee table. “Doesn’t this look nice?” 

“Almost as nice as you smell right now.”

Taylor laughs again and turns to face Karlie. “Okay, babe, what’s up? It’s not that I don't appreciate the sentiment, but you’re being weird.” Taking Karlie’s hand, she brings it up to her mouth and kisses it. “I meant it when I said we should eat dinner first, because I really want to eat something and it’s not the thing you’re thinking of right now.”

Karlie grins cheekily back at her. “Can’t a girl just want to spend some quality time with her girlfriend after having been apart for two weeks?” When Taylor just cocks an eyebrow at her, Karlie gives in. “Okay, fine,” she says, “it’s just a teeny, tiny little thing. My parents called earlier and they’re going away for a week next month and they asked if we can take Joe while they’re gone.” 

“Is this why you bought me flowers?” Taylor asks, eyeing Karlie skeptically.

“No,” Karlie laughs, “I swear I bought them before my parents called.”

Nodding, Taylor takes her time mulling over her answer, and Karlie stares hopefully at her the entire time.

“Okay,” Taylor finally says, “he can stay, but our bed is off limits.”

***

“Food’s here!” Taylor yells out two seconds before she walks into the living room where Karlie is waiting on the couch.

She puts it down on the coffee table and hands Karlie her box of Chinese noodles. With her own box, a napkin and some chopsticks in her hands, she sits down next right next to Karlie, so close that their knees are touching.

“So what are the boxes in the hallway for?” Taylor asks after a few mouthfuls of food.

“Oh,” Karlie says, “that’s just stuff from my apartment. I’m thinking maybe I should lease it out.”

“Lease it out?”

“Yeah! The place is always empty now that I spend all of my time here with you, and I feel so bad for it. It was my first real place and I feel like I’m abandoning it.”

“That makes sense,” Taylor says, a thoughtful look on her face.

“It does.” Karlie puts her food down on the table and turns to face Taylor. “We’ve gone public, everyone knows about us. We already live together. What do you say we make it official?”

Taylor meets Karlie’s gaze and the look on her face makes Karlie melt. 

“There’s nothing I’d want more,” she murmurs, pulling Karlie in for a kiss. “I can have some of my guys find someone to lease it out to if you’d like. Are you going to lease it out furnished?”

“Why? Do we need more furniture?” Karlie chuckles.

“No,” Taylor laughs, “but you could have been extra attached to your couch or something, I don’t know.”

“I like my couch but I’m not especially attached to it. I need to get all my stuff though; I don’t think a potential tenant will appreciate our pictures hanging everywhere.”

“Good point,” Taylor laughs. “We’ll go pack your things next time you have a day off.”

“Sounds good to me.” 

Karlie leans back into the couch, not taking her eyes off Taylor. She plays absentmindedly with Taylor’s hair while Taylor finishes her food and thinks about how all the pieces are finally falling into place. 

Eventually Taylor puts her empty box down on the table and turns to Karlie. She trails her fingers up Karlie’s thigh and leans in close to her, whispering into her ear. “Are you ready for dessert yet?”

Eager to take Taylor up on that offer, she pulls her in and kisses her hungrily.

Not long after, both of them are half naked on the couch, enjoying each other’s company in the best way possible.


	37. Chapter 36

Taylor has only been back in New York for a few days when everything suddenly blows up in their faces.

Karlie’s on her way to the day’s second meeting when her phone rings. She glances at the display to see who is calling before picking it up, but her brain doesn’t quite register who it is.

“Hello?” she says, somewhat preoccupied with trying to cross the street.

“Um, yeah, hi, this is Jamie,” Taylor’s youngest security guard says, and Karlie can hear a touch of nervousness behind his words.

“Hi Jamie, what’s up?” 

“We kind of have a situation,” he says, “and I, that is, we need you to come down to the hospital right away.”

“The hospital?” The words catch in Karlie’s throat as she stops dead in her tracks. Why the hospital? Taylor… what? 

“It’s nothing bad,” Jamie says hurriedly, “but Taylor wanted to get out of the house and had it arranged to go visit the children’s ward, but the issue right now is that she seems to be having some sort of a panic attack and she’s locked herself into the ladies’ room and refuses to come out.”

“Jamie, for God’s sake, lead with that next time, will you?” Karlie almost sneers into the phone, her pulse racing from the shock. “You can’t scare me like that! I thought something serious had happened to her.”

“I’m sorry, ma’am. I will most certainly lead with that if the situation ever occurs again. Do you need us to send a car to come get you?”

“No, it’s fine,” Karlie sighs, the adrenaline still pumping through her body. “I’ll take a cab. Tell her I’ll be there soon.”

“I will, ma’am.”

***

Jamie meets Karlie in the hospital foyer half an hour later and leads her to Taylor.

“I’m really sorry we called you,” he says quietly while they’re walking through the long hallways. “We just didn’t know what to do or how to get her out of there and we couldn’t exactly kick down the door either.”

“Breathe, buddy,” Karlie says and pats his shoulder lightly. “It’s okay, you did the right thing.”

“Yeah, well, she’s in here.” He stops in front of a door and stands to the side so Karlie can go in. 

“Okay, we’ll be out soon,” she says and sends a small smile his way before opening the door.

She opens the door to reveal a room with five doors and five sinks. The door all the way in the back is the only door that’s closed, and she sighs as she closes the door behind her and walks down towards it. “Taylor?” she says and knocks on the door. When there’s no answer, she knocks again. “Taylor, I know you’re in there. Please just open the door.”

A few more silent seconds pass before the door is finally opened, revealing a trembling Taylor staring up at Karlie.

“Oh babe,” Karlie mutters as Taylor buries her face in Karlie’s chest. Karlie instinctively strokes Taylor’s hair and holds her until the trembling dies down.

“I’m sorry,” Taylor mumbles quietly into Karlie’s shirt. 

“Hey, it’s okay,” Karlie soothes, “it happens. Do you want to talk about it?”

Taylor loosens her hold on Karlie and finally meets her gaze. She shakes her head but starts talking anyway. “I don’t know what happened. I just… I wanted to do something nice for the kids, get out of the house for a while, but then I got here and I suddenly felt like a million pairs of eyes were staring at me, judging me, and it just got to be way too much. I feel so stupid.”

“Don’t feel stupid,” Karlie says and runs her hands up and down Taylor’s arms before pulling her in for a hug. She waits for Taylor to continue talking while she holds her close, but they end up standing in silence as Taylor is seemingly all talked out.

Abruptly, Taylor takes a step back and breaks their hug. “You had a meeting today, didn’t you?” she asks, her eyes wide with realization. “But now you’re here, with me, instead of being there at the meeting. Oh no, I’ve ruined everything. That meeting was important!”

“Taylor, stop.” Karlie holds her at an arm’s length and looks deeply into her eyes. “I called the guys and asked if we could postpone the meeting for two hours. It’s fine. Really. You are important to me and I will always come running when you need me, so stop, please. You haven’t ruined anything except maybe your makeup, but that can be fixed. Please, relax. Breathe.”

Taylor holds her gaze while they stand in silence, transfixed on each other. Karlie breathes deeply and calmly and Taylor mirrors her until the trembling recedes.

“Feel better?” Karlie asks softly and Taylor nods. 

“Thank you,” she murmurs and takes Karlie’s hand. “Let’s go, I think the kids are waiting.”

When they finally walk out into the hallway, Jamie nearly jumps out from the wall. He still looks nervous and uncertain as he gazes questioningly at them, but he doesn’t say anything. Instead he waits for instructions on what to do next.

Taylor looks at him sheepishly, a faint blush visible on her cheeks. “Sorry about that,” she says, “I’m not sure what came over me.” She turns towards Karlie and grabs her hand. “I guess you’re going, then.”

“Yeah,” Karlie smiles, “I still have that meeting to go to.”

“I’m really sorry you had to postpone it.”

“No, stop that,” Karlie orders, “I swear it’s okay.”

“If you insist…”

“I insist.” 

The goofy grin on Karlie’s face makes Taylor roll her eyes at her, but she smiles happily back at her. “Go,” she says, “I’ll see you tonight.”

“Call me when you’re done, okay? Bye babe.”

With a peck on the lips and a wink from Karlie, the two girls walk down the corridor in opposite directions.

***

Hours later, Karlie hurries past a line of paparazzi standing on the opposite side of the road from their Tribeca apartment. She keeps her eyes fixed on the ground in front of her and tries to forget about them. She’s just so tired of them always hanging out there lately and wonders when the news about her and Taylor will die down.

Walking up the stairs to the door, she pulls out her key and slips it into the lock, hearing the faint buzz of camera shutters mixed in with traffic in the background. With a quick glance towards the street before stepping through the doors, she suddenly finds herself looking at a strangely familiar face smiling back at her. Her brain flips through pictures of everyone she knows, everyone that she’s ever talked to, but it’s coming up blank. She shrugs before she sends a quick smile the girl’s way and enters the hallway, shutting the sounds of the city out behind her.

It hits her when she’s about to unlock the door to the apartment: the girl outside was the same girl who had been standing outside of her apartment only a few days ago, and a shiver runs down her spine. _You have got to be joking_ , she thinks to herself. _It must be a coincidence_.

She tries to get the picture of the girl out of her mind as she calls out to Taylor, letting her know she’s home. When no one replies, she starts to wonder if Taylor’s even back yet and glances at her phone to check if there’s a message she hasn’t seen, but there’s nothing. Shrugging to herself, she kicks off her shoes before settling down on the couch to wait for Taylor to come home and is quickly joined by Olivia.

“Hi baby,” she coos to the cat and grabs the remote for the TV. Not knowing what she wants to watch, she flips through several channels and is just about to press the button one more time when she hears Taylor’s name.

“…saying that Taylor Swift should explicitly ask permission from every parent in the hospital before visiting their sick kids?” The camera flashes from a reporter to what looks like a parent.

“What I’m saying is that my 14-year-old was alone in her room with Taylor Swift today.”

“And why is that such an issue? Most 14-year-olds would love to be alone in a room with Taylor Swift.”

“It makes me uncomfortable that _someone like her_ spends time with my daughter without the visit being supervised.”

“’Someone like her’? You mean someone famous, or…?”

The parent fidgets uncomfortably on camera, clearly trying to figure out what to respond. “You know what I mean,” she says meekly after a while, her eyes shying away from the camera and down on the ground in front of her. 

“You mean someone not straight.”

“Er…” the parent says, her cheeks reddening by the second.

“ARGH,” Karlie yells out as she turns the TV off, not wanting to hear another word coming from that horrible woman’s mouth. She’s suddenly ready to punch something, anything, but her anger deflates a little when she hears the front door open. Taylor’s voice runs through the apartment and it’s clear she’s not alone.

“I just don’t understand! I’m not into 14-year-olds; I’m into Karlie. I thought parents would be thrilled I went to visit their children. Their children tend to like me, you know!”

“I know that and I’m sure their parents do too.” Tree sounds tired and the second Karlie rounds the corner and spot both of them, she can tell that Tree looks tired too. “This is a knee-jerk reaction from a parent who clearly needs to take her frustrations out on someone. Her child is sick, she is probably scared, and you just happen to be a great scapegoat for her problems right now. Out of all of her issues, this is probably the one thing she feels like she can still control.” She shifts her gaze to Karlie and gives her a small smile. “Hi Karlie, how are you?”

“Better than you, it seems,” Karlie says but smiles back.

“Yeah…” Tree says with a shrug. “This was unexpected fire. I take it you heard?”

“I happened to come across a news report about it just a few minutes ago.”

With an arm around Taylor’s waist, she pulls her girlfriend close to her. Taylor immediately buries her face in the crook of Karlie’s neck to gain some composure.

“Babe,” Karlie says softly into her ear, “are you okay?”

“I just don’t know what I can do anymore,” Taylor replies. “I clearly can’t go visit sick children anymore to cheer them up because their parents will yell at me and the media will have a field day.”

“You just have to give people some time, Taylor,” Tree says. “Keep doing what you have been doing; do good things for people. There’s not really anything more you can do. We all knew coming out would be difficult for the public to handle, but most people will come around.”

“I know, I know,” Taylor sighs.

“I’ll see if we need to make a statement about this, okay? For now, just sit tight and try to relax. Things will eventually die down.” Tree smiles a reassuring smile that Taylor tentatively returns. “I’ll call you if anything else comes up tonight, and if not we’ll reassess the situation tomorrow. Okay?”

“Okay.”

“Good. Enjoy your evening, girls.”

When the door closes behind Tree, Taylor lets out a loud groan. “Sometimes I really just hate people. I hadn’t even left the hospital yet when this whole circus started. Paparazzi followed me all the way from the hospital and back here. Luckily Tree said we could pick her up on the way so we could discuss it while it was still happening, but just… I’m so tired of them, Karlie. I’m tired of having to walk past them every time we go outside. Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love this apartment, but I just wish it was a little bit more private right now.”

Karlie strokes Taylor’s cheek lightly and gives her a peck on the lips. “I know, baby. Ever since you came back from Nashville they’ve been camped out there almost all the time.” 

Taylor rubs her face and lets out yet another frustrated groan.

“Hey,” Karlie says and takes Taylor’s hand, “what do you say we order some food, open up a bottle of wine and spend the rest of the night playing Scrabble? I’ll even let you win without a fight if you want.” She winks hopefully at Taylor, who kisses her on the cheek.

“That sounds perfect right now. What do you feel like?” She walks into the kitchen and grabs the pile of menus they have stored in one of the cabinets.

“Italian sounds good?”

“Deal. I’ll call the guys.”

While Taylor orders the food, Karlie pours wine into two glasses and gives one to Taylor the second she comes back. 

“Do you know what we could do?” Taylor says as she takes the glass from Karlie and puts it to her lips, taking a sip. “I’ve been toying with the idea of renovating this place now that you’re officially moving in, just so it’s more distinctly our place, you know? But if we want to do that, we obviously need to find somewhere else to live in the meantime. We could try to find a place with a garage or something, a private entrance where we could come and go a bit more as we please.”

“That’s not a bad idea actually,” Karlie says and signals for Taylor to follow her to the living room. “That reminds me though; I think there’s a girl following me or something.”

“Are you serious?”

“I don’t know if she’s actually following me. It could be a coincidence. She was outside of my apartment the other day and I almost literally ran into her because I wasn’t really paying attention. She just took a picture of me and jumped into a car that drove off immediately. I shrugged it off because sure, it was weird, but it was a one-off, you know? But then today I spotted her outside when I came home. I didn’t realize it was her until I reached our door, but it was definitely her.” She looks up and sees the spooked look on Taylor’s face. “I don’t know, like I said, it could be a coincidence.”

“Or she could be a stalker,” Taylor replies, horrified. “Wouldn’t be the first time, you know.”

“I know,” Karlie says with a sigh, “but I’ll be careful. I’m just not convinced there’s anything strange going on. It’s only been two times.”

“Can you at least take one of the guys with you until further notice?”

Karlie takes Taylor’s hand and squeezes it reassuringly. “If I see her again, I promise I’ll take one of the guys with me until the situation has been assessed and handled, okay?”

“Okay,” Taylor says grudgingly, “but just so you know, we are definitely moving somewhere more private for a while.”

“I can accept that,” Karlie says and kisses Taylor’s hand. “Now, let’s find that box of Scrabble.”


	38. Chapter 37

When the cats start meowing the next morning, Karlie quietly gets out of bed and shoos them out of the bedroom to make sure Taylor doesn’t wake up. 

The night before ended up being really long for Taylor; even though both of them were exhausted from the day’s happenings, Taylor was tossing and turning next to Karlie all night and only fell into a peaceful sleep in the early hours of the morning. 

Deciding that Taylor needs to sleep for a while longer, Karlie quickly grabs some clothes and hurries after the cats. Stopping for a second to look over her shoulder, she smiles at her sleeping girlfriend before closing the bedroom door quietly behind her.

Olivia is waiting for her by the stairs and snakes herself around Karlie’s legs, rubbing her fluffy fur against Karlie’s naked skin. Karlie responds by picking the white cat up from the floor and scratches her behind the ears while she walks downstairs. “Such a pretty kitty,” she coos at her, getting a soft meow in return.

Walking into the kitchen, she finds Meredith hungrily circling the empty food bowls. The cat proceeds to give her a look that can only translate to “feed me, now,” and Karlie chuckles at her while she gets the food from the cupboard.

“I love you too, Mer,” she laughs.

She sits down on one of the bar stools by the kitchen island and watches them eat for a little while. A cat's life seems so simple and easy. If only real life was like that.

Sighing, she gets up and checks the time; she has just enough time to make Taylor breakfast before going to the gym, and she sets to work immediately.

***

Karlie’s just making the finishing touches to the beautiful breakfast tray, filled with French toast, fresh strawberries, banana and watermelon cut into little hearts, when Taylor’s phone chimes from somewhere in the hallway. Putting down an unfinished watermelon heart, she rushes to find it before it stops ringing. 

She finds it in between the cushions on the couch. Spotting Tree’s name on the caller ID, she decides to pick it up instead of letting it go to voice mail. 

“Hey Tree, this is Karlie,” she says, the words coming out a little rushed.

“Oh hey Karlie,” Tree replies, confusion coating her words. “Didn’t I call Taylor?”

“You did,” Karlie laughs, “I figured it was okay that I answered. She’s still asleep.”

“I don’t blame her,” Tree mutters, “I really wish I was still asleep too.”

“Rough night?”

“You could say that. I was up doing damage control, urging a few media outlets to twist the angle to something a little nicer. I don’t think there’s much more we can do. We just have to wait for it to blow over.”

“Hopefully it’ll blow over quickly. As much as I would like to, I don’t have the time to whisk her away to a remote and safe location right now,” Karlie sighs.

“I know, but I think she’ll be okay,” Tree reassures her. “I should let you go, but tell her I called, alright? I’ll check in on her later.”

“I will.”

Going back to the kitchen, Taylor’s phone in her hand, she quickly discovers a cat sniffing Taylor’s breakfast. Scooching Olivia away, she puts Taylor’s phone down on the breakfast tray so she can turn her attention to the unfinished piece of watermelon. Instead of finishing it up, she shoves it into her mouth, enjoying the refreshing and sweet taste. 

Picking up the tray, she walks over to the dumbwaiter right outside the kitchen and puts it in before she goes back to fetch a jug of freshly squeezed orange juice and a pot of tea. She runs back to the kitchen one final time to pick up a pot of coffee that she carries with her upstairs. 

Sneaking into the bedroom, she puts the coffee pot down on the dresser by the door, and soon all of the space on the dresser is taken up by the large tray of food Karlie has prepared.

Putting on some dim lights, she walks over to the bed and crawls in, giving Taylor a kiss on the cheek to wake her up. “Babe,” she coos as she throws her arms around her sleepy girlfriend.

“Mmm,” Taylor murmurs and turns in Karlie’s arms. “Good morning.”

“Morning,” Karlie replies and leans in for a quick kiss. “I got you something.”

She hurries out of bed and over to the dresser to pick up the tray. “Sit up,” she instructs Taylor, who does as she’s told.

“What’s this?” Taylor asks, picking up her glasses from the bedside table. 

“Breakfast,” Karlie says with a grin. She holds the tray over Taylor’s lap, and Taylor pulls the tray’s legs out so Karlie can put it down over her lap. 

“This is beautiful, Kar. Thank you.” 

“You’re welcome, babe. I wanted to do something nice for you this morning. You’ve been tossing and turning all night and after yesterday I just figured you could use something nice.”

Taylor sends a look full of love Karlie’s way, flashing her a genuine smile. “You’re the perfect girlfriend.”

Karlie feels heat spread across her cheeks as she blushes slightly from Taylor’s remark and she smiles happily. “What would you like to drink? I have juice, coffee and tea. Wasn’t sure which one you’d want.”

“Juice, please,” Taylor answers and bites into a strawberry, clearly enjoying it. “This is really good. Are you staying?”

“No, sorry babe, I can’t. I have a date with the gym, but I wanted to make sure you have everything before I head off.”

Taylor chuckles as she looks down onto her lap. “I think I’m all set.”

“Good! I’ll see you in a few hours.” 

***

Two hours later, Karlie emerges from the gym, feeling happy and content after the morning’s workout. Stopping right outside the building’s entrance, she pauses for a moment, taking in the familiar sounds of New York.

She glances aimlessly around as she makes her way down the building’s front steps, her phone in her hand. Suddenly her eyes see a now too familiar face sitting in a car parked a few spots away, staring at her with a smile on her face. Adrenaline pumps through her body as she continues walking; she’s focusing so intently on the girl inside this car that she doesn’t see where she’s going.

Her brain registers a faint “look out!” before she crashes into something hard. 

Losing her balance, she falls over the object in front of her face first, a sharp pain shooting up her arm. _Oh no, not again_.

Attempting to scramble back onto her feet, she realizes she’s fallen over a guy on a bike. He’s halfway pinned under her and she awkwardly maneuvers herself off of him and his bike. Her shoulder is throbbing, her knee stings and her head is buzzing a little. 

“Oh my God,” she mutters, “I’m so sorry. Are you okay? Please be okay.”

Tears are pressing on her eyelids as the guy on the bike grunts and takes a few shaky breaths.

“I think I’ll be fine,” he eventually manages to say and she releases the bit of breath she hadn’t realized she was holding. 

“I’m really, really sorry. I… I wasn’t looking where I was going. Do you need an ambulance? Should I… I don’t know where my phone went.” She looks around frantically for it and spots it lying in the gutter a couple of feet away.

“Already on it,” a voice says in the background and Karlie nods slightly, still shocked from the whole ordeal.

Someone walks over and picks up her phone, handing it to her alongside a towel. “You’re bleeding,” the deep voice says, and she suddenly spots the blood running down her left hand, dripping onto the pavement. 

Looking up at him, she meets the gentle eyes of a curly-haired guy she’s seen a few times at the gym.

“Thank you,” she whispers and wraps the towel around her hand. Her bad shoulder throbs dully for the first time in months with the motion and tears are yet again pressing on her eyelids. 

“An ambulance is coming now,” the voice behind her says and she turns to see two people sitting next to the cyclist. He’s still lying on the ground, his bike now lying next to him; the two guys sitting next to him probably lifted it off him while she was busy looking for her phone.

“Hey,” the curly-haired guy says, gently touching her arm. “Do you need me to call someone for you? You should really get that cut looked at.”

“Uh…” she says, her brain trying to catch up. “No. I… I’ll just call my girlfriend. But thank you.” 

The screen on her phone is cracked from the fall, but she carefully unlocks it to call Taylor, who answers on the second ring.

“Hey babe, are you on your way home?” she asks cheerfully. 

“I… not exactly. Can you come pick me up? I need you to take me to the hospital.”

“What? Why? Karlie…?”

“Can you please just come get me? I’ll tell you everything when you get here.” Her voice is quivering slightly and her focus is solely on keeping herself together until Taylor gets there.

“Of course. Where are you?”

“Outside of my gym.”

“Okay. I’ll be right there.”

***

Fifteen minutes later, Taylor’s black SUV pulls up to the curb behind the ambulance, and she nearly flies out the door, running over to Karlie who is sitting on the steps in front of the gym. Taylor embraces her immediately, running her hand over Karlie’s hair and kissing the top of her head while muttering “you’re okay” over and over.

After a short minute, she sees the bloodstained towel wrapped around Karlie’s hand. “Babe, what happened?”

“See that guy on the gurney?” Karlie asks, nodding in his direction. “Yeah, I kind of walked directly into him and fell on top of him and his bike. He’ll be fine, but I’m so embarrassed.”

“We should probably get you checked out. Who gave you the towel?”

“That guy over there,” Karlie says and points. “The one with the curly hair.”

“Alright. Why don’t you go wait for me in the car and I’ll be right there, okay?”

Karlie nods as she gingerly gets up from the steps. “My shoulder hurts again,” she says quietly, tears suddenly brimming in her eyes. 

Taylor looks at her sympathetically and wipes away a tear from Karlie’s cheek. “It will be okay,” she says soothingly.

Karlie walks to the car and crawls in while she sees Taylor walking over to the towel guy, shaking his hand and pulling out some money from her purse. He politely declines, shaking his head and gesturing towards the car, but Taylor isn’t having it and eventually the guy takes the money she’s offering him. Then she walks over to the ambulance and exchanges a few words with the driver before walking back to the car.

“I wanted to know where they were taking him,” she says as the door is closed behind her. “That way we can send him something to, I don’t know, apologize or something. Or show that we care.”

Karlie just nods, those tears she had worked so hard to hold back finally making their way out.

“Oh Karlie,” Taylor says and pulls her close.

“I keep bleeding on things,” Karlie mumbles in between quiet sobs, “and my phone is shattered and…”

“Shhh,” Taylor says comfortingly, “we’ll get you stitched up and I’ll buy you a new phone. Why don’t you tell me what happened? With details this time.”

Karlie sniffles and wipes her face with her good hand. “I was just coming out from the gym and had just started walking when I spotted that girl, the one who’s been following me, sitting in a car, just looking at me. That really freaked me out and I guess I just wasn’t paying attention to where I was going because I swear this bike came out of nowhere and suddenly everything hurt and there was chaos and…”

“ARE YOU KIDDING ME? Where the hell is she? I will end her, I fucking swear!” Taylor starts moving closer to the door, looking like she’s about to get out of the car to go punch the girl in the face.

“Taylor, stop,” Karlie says. She reaches out and grabs Taylor’s arm, and her shoulder screams in protest, causing Karlie to grimace. “Sit down; you’re not going to do anything, at least not right now. She’s not worth the bad publicity. Besides, she’s probably long gone by now.” 

Sinking back into her seat, Taylor punches the seat cushion next to her instead. “That’s it,” Taylor says sternly, “you’re taking one of my guys with you from now on. I swear, Karlie, if I could get my hands on her, she wouldn’t know what hit her.”

“Okay, okay,” Karlie says, “I’ll take one of them, I promise.”

***

Several hours, four stitches and a scan of her shoulder later, Karlie is finally at home getting comfortable on the couch.

As Taylor tucks a blanket around her, carefully tucking it in under Karlie’s arm, Karlie sighs loudly. 

“I feel like we’re right back to where we were six months ago,” she says and looks down at her arm. “I hate this sling, I want to burn it.”

“It’s only going to be a couple of days, but I understand the sentiment,” Taylor says and laughs. “You know they just want to make sure you didn’t get the injury to flare up again.”

“I know,” Karlie pouts, “I just hate it.”

“I know you do.” 

Taylor walks around the room grabbing things to bring over to the couch. She finds the remote for the TV as well as Karlie’s new phone and plugs it into the wall to charge. Bringing the remote back to Karlie, she hands it to her with a smile. “Is there anything you want?”

“Other than to get rid of this sling?” Karlie retorts, earning herself an eye roll from Taylor. “Ice cream would be nice.”

“Okay,” Taylor says, “I’ll be right back. Find us a movie while I go fetch it.”

Karlie flips through the Netflix selection, not sure what to watch. The bandage on her hand is itching and her shoulder is throbbing dully, a continuous reminder of how fragile it’s been since their accident in March. She scowls at the thought of it and silently curses the girl for being creepy as she wallows in self-pity. 

She jumps when Taylor suddenly sits down next to her, breaking her train of thought.

“You scared me,” she exclaims.

“I’m sorry,” Taylor says and snuggles close to her. She puts her arm behind Karlie’s neck, her hand resting on Karlie’s bad shoulder, and she carefully strokes it.

“I love you, you know,” she says and kisses Karlie’s cheek. “And I’m really sorry you’ve been hurt again. Sometimes I just want to wrap you up and put you in my pocket and keep you with me at all times so stupid things won’t happen to you.”

Karlie laughs at Taylor’s silly love declaration. “You’re perfect and I love you too. I also think you should decide on a movie because I’m indecisive today and can’t figure out what I want.”

“Do you have any idea at all what you feel up for?”

“No,” she replies with a smile on a face, “everything is good as long as I get to watch it with you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for taking so long getting the updates out these days. Life is busy busy at the moment and I've also started writing a new story (not fanfiction) and so my brain is juggling two stories at the moment. That's not an excuse though, lots of people write several things at once haha. 
> 
> I'll try to be better, promise :D


	39. Chapter 38

When Karlie goes back to the hospital a week later to get her stitches out, Taylor comes with her. They sit in the worn waiting room chairs, waiting for the doctor to finish up with another patient. Taylor is focused on Karlie’s hand as she expertly brushes a sharpie over Karlie’s bandage. After a few minutes she sits back and lets her fingers trace softly over the cat drawing she’s just drawn.

“This turned out really nice,” she says happily and looks up at Karlie, who chuckles.

“It did. Just a shame it’s about to be thrown away.”

“That’s okay, I’ll just draw something else on the next one.”

Taylor’s eyes go back to the drawing as she traces the outline of it with her finger. The lightness of Taylor’s touch makes Karlie’s hand tickle a little and she resists the urge of shaking Taylor’s hand away.

“You know you didn’t have to come with me for this,” Karlie says softly. 

“I know,” Taylor replies without looking up at her. “I just wanted to spend the day with you. It’s not like I had any other plans.”

Her eyes come up to meet Karlie’s now along with a loving smile. 

Karlie can feel her own eyes dancing across Taylor’s face and she can’t not return the smile, especially not when the smile is as beautiful as Taylor’s is. 

“Is that Taylor Swift?” someone whispers in the background, and Karlie turns her head in the direction of the whisper. It’s impossible to know which person muttered it but several heads are turned towards them, their curiosity bouncing off them in waves as they glance from Taylor to Karlie to the two security guards sitting on either side of them.

“We must look so intimidating right now,” Karlie laughs.

“Not that intimidating,” Taylor says and nods towards a girl who looks about 7 walking over towards them, a cast on her arm.

“Hi sweetie,” Taylor says when she stands in front of them. “What’s your name?”

“Ella,” the girl says with a toothy grin. 

“That’s a pretty name. I have a friend named Ella, actually.”

“I have one too, she lives next door.” Holding out her arm, she grins again, revealing a missing front tooth. “Can you sign my arm?”

“Are you getting the cast taken off today?”

“No,” the girl laughs.

“Okay, then I can sign it. Wouldn’t have been any fun if you couldn’t show your friends at school tomorrow, now would it?” She digs through her purse for a second and finds the sharpie she just used to draw on Karlie’s bandage.

A few minutes later the girl is beaming with joy as she runs back to her mother sitting at the other end of the room, her cast featuring a similar drawing as the one on Karlie’s hand.

“I think you made her day,” Karlie remarks and places a peck on Taylor’s cheek.

Seconds later they’re interrupted by a nurse walking up to them. “Miss Kloss? The doctor is ready for you. Please come with me.”

“Oh, great, thanks,” Karlie says and gets up to follow her. Taylor follows directly behind them, leaving Bruce and Jamie behind in the waiting room.

A short and stocky man greets them as they walk through the door. “Miss Kloss,” he says, “I’m Dr. Borac.” He reaches out a hand and Karlie shakes it firmly as the doctor looks from her to Taylor. “Ah, I see you brought your girlfriend,” he says with a smile and shakes Taylor’s hand as well. “If we knew you’d come along as well, we would have found you a private room to wait in.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Taylor says, “we were fine in the waiting room.”

“Good, good. It’s lovely to meet you. My daughter Aisha is a huge fan of yours.”

“How old is she?”

“Fifteen.” Taking a few steps backwards, he gestures to a couple of chairs. “Please,” he says, “sit.” He takes a look at his computer and quickly reads through Karlie’s file. “I see here that we put you in a sling for a few days because an old injury in your shoulder flared up when you fell, is that correct?”

“Yeah,” Karlie sighs, “that wasn’t very enjoyable, to be honest with you.”

“And has your shoulder been giving you any trouble the past couple of days?”

“No, not really. It’s still a little sore if I put a lot of weight on it from a weird angle, but it generally feels like it’s back to normal.”

“That’s good,” Dr. Borac says. “I’m just going to do a quick check-up on it, just to be safe. Is that okay with you?”

“Yeah, of course. Go for it.”

While the doctor examines her shoulder, holding her arm in different directions and rolling the shoulder, asking her if she feels any pain, Karlie side-eyes Taylor suspiciously. The girl is doing something inside her purse, trying to be discreet, but Karlie knows that Taylor is definitely up to something. 

“Your shoulder seems to be fine,” the doctor finally says and sits back down. “If you do experience any discomfort with it, don’t hesitate to give us a call. Let’s just have a quick look at your hand before I send you in to the nurse to get those stitches out.”

When Karlie holds out her hand, Dr. Borac chuckles lightly. “Nice artwork,” he says as he gently rips it off. “Your handiwork?”

“Taylor’s,” Karlie grins.

At the sound of her name, Taylor quickly looks up at them before she looks back down into her purse. Karlie gazes back at her with narrowed eyes, wondering what she’s up to.

“The wound looks good; no sign of infection and it seems to have healed well. I think you’re good to go!” 

He stands up, the two girls following suit just moments after him, and leads them to the door. “It’s been nice meeting you both,” he says, shaking their hands once more.

“Just a minute,” Taylor says and reaches into her purse, pulling out an envelope. “Give this to your daughter. I’m sure you’ll be her favorite parent tonight.”

“I’ll make sure she gets it, thank you.”

Once the doctor has closed the door behind them, Karlie leans in towards Taylor, whispering into her ear. “What did you give her?”

“Oh, you know, just a note… telling her to contact Taylor Nation for a surprise the next time I’m doing a show in New York.”

“You’re amazing, you know that?

“You might have mentioned it before,” Taylor says smugly, winking at Karlie before turning her attention towards the nurse that’s waiting for them. “Come on, let’s go get those stitches out.”

***

After two long weeks of fashion week events, Karlie’s finally on her way back to her Parisian hotel room for her nightly facetime call with Taylor. She misses snuggling up to her after a long day and while facetime is a poor substitute, it’s definitely better than nothing.

She’s just left the evening’s party and is working her way through the hallways towards the door. Around her, her fellow models and friends are mingling with a variety of others and the chatter around her is a continuous cacophony of voices indistinguishable from each other.

Rounding a corner, she recognizes two of her fellow models, Harley & Ariana, having a conversation at the end of the hallway. The two girls look like their focus is entirely on the conversation, neither of them seemingly noticing Karlie walking towards them.

The area where the girls are is quiet and small parts of their conversation trickle their way into Karlie’s ears. She isn't paying any attention to the little snippets at first, her mind busy with thoughts of Taylor, but then she suddenly hears Taylor’s name. 

“…like, why would Taylor Swift even have to come out, you know? She’s a role model for little children and that stuff just isn’t natural, but…”

Karlie calmly walks up to them as Ariana’s voice dies out into an eerie silence.

“Oh hi, Karlie,” Harley says a little nervously, “how much of that did you hear?”

Karlie stares icily back at her before she shifts her gaze to Ariana. “Enough to know that maybe you shouldn’t talk about my girlfriend like that, especially considering whose lips I know yours are on whenever people aren’t looking.”

Ariana’s eyes widen as a faint shade of crimson creeps into her cheeks. “No, but, wait, you don’t…” she splutters and closes her eyes for a second as she takes a deep breath.

As Ariana takes a moment, Karlie glares at the two of them. Her stare is cold enough that Harley takes a nervous step to the side, her fingers twisting around each other as the tension builds around them.

“Look, Karlie,” Ariana starts, her voice a little shaky, “I think you missed what I said before that. I was paraphrasing a conversation I had with my mother not too long ago, because I kind of wanted to figure out the lay of the land, you know, so I could tell her ‘whose lips mine are on whenever people aren’t looking’.”

“Oh…” Karlie mutters, the harshness on her face melting away as a feeling of regret creeps into her.

“Yeah… So I really wasn’t saying that stuff about Taylor because I meant it, because I don’t. My mother on the other hand…”

“Yeah, no, I understand…” Karlie mumbles awkwardly.

They stand in an awkward silence as the seconds trickle by. Karlie feels more and more embarrassed and shuffles her foot lightly as she looks up at the two girls. “I, uh, I’m just gonna… you know, go. Yeah.” 

Quietly she shuffles around the two girls and hurries down the hallway as quickly as she can, their faint goodbyes lingering behind her until she’s well inside her own hotel room with the door shut.

She falls backwards down onto the bed and facetimes Taylor, who picks up immediately.

“You are not going to believe what I just managed to do. It's so embarrassing,” she says and launches into a quick summary of the conversation.

When she finishes, Taylor’s laugh fills the hotel room. “Oh Karlie,” Taylor says, “I love you for standing up for me, but I think maybe you jumped the gun here.”

“You think?” Karlie says, not feeling as joyous as Taylor. Rolling over onto her stomach, she puts her phone in front of her on the pillow. “Tell me what you’ve been up to so I don’t have to replay this embarrassing story over and over in my head.”

“Mostly the usual: I’ve written some songs, gone to the gym, almost been killed by Meredith…”

“What did you do this time?”

“What? What did _I_ do?” Taylor exclaims teasingly. “Why do you never ask what SHE did? I didn’t do anything, she clearly just hates me for no reason at all.”

“At least you have Olivia,” Karlie laughs.

“As much as I love her, she’s useless against Meredith,” Taylor replies in all seriousness. She holds Karlie’s gaze for a while before she gives Karlie a shy smile. “I miss you.” It’s a simple statement, enounced with a vulnerable softness. 

“I miss you too.”

***

A few days later, Karlie is finally on her way up to their apartment alongside Jeff and four suitcases. She uses her own key to unlock the door to their apartment and thanks Jeff for coming to pick her up from the airport. 

“Just doing my job,” he says with a wink.

As she closes the door behind him, she can feel Taylor coming up behind her. 

Taylor trails one arm around Karlie’s side as she turns her around and places her soft lips on Karlie’s in a welcoming kiss. “Hi, baby,” she breathes into Karlie’s ear, holding her close as she buries her face in the crook of Karlie’s neck.

Karlie gently kisses the top of Taylor’s head and breathes in her scent, grateful she’s finally home.

Breaking their embrace, Taylor takes both of Karlie’s hands in her own and grins at her. “I want to show you something,” she says and starts leading Karlie through the apartment and into the library.

“I’ve been looking at a few places where we can live while we renovate, and I think I finally found a place. It’s really beautiful, narrow and unique and it even has a private garage so no one can really see us come and go. Oh, and there’s a pool.”

She opens her laptop and finds the listing for the apartment, giving Karlie the chair so she can flip through the pictures of the place.

“Do you know what we can do in that pool?” she purrs into Karlie’s ear and Karlie laughs.

“Down, tiger,” she chuckles but wraps an arm around Taylor’s waist, pulling her just a little closer. She places lazy kisses on Taylor’s stomach as she scrolls through the listing, studying every little detail.

“I like it,” she says eventually and looks expectantly up at Taylor.

“You do?”

“I do. I think we should take it.”

“Will you come see it with me tomorrow? We could stop by Cammie and get coffee after if you’d like.”

“There’s nothing I would like to do more,” Karlie murmurs and pulls Taylor down for a kiss. “Actually,” she says and lets her hand trail under Taylor’s shirt, “there is one thing I’d like to do more.”

“Oh really?” Taylor remarks, a playful smirk on her face. “I wonder what that could be.”

Karlie answers by putting her lips on Taylor’s stomach before getting up from the chair. She leads Taylor into the living room and soon the two girls are entangled on the couch, celebrating their reunion.


	40. Chapter 39

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just because I can & wanted to:

Two weeks later, Taylor closes the living room door in their newly rented West Village townhouse and turns around to look at Karlie who is sitting in one of the large chairs. Her eyes sparkle mischievously as she walks across the room and sits down on the edge of the chair. A hand is quickly placed on Karlie’s cheek and is quickly followed by Taylor’s soft lips tracing a love heart in the form of kisses on Karlie’s face.

“Dance with me,” Taylor purrs into Karlie’s ear. 

Her hands intertwine with Karlie’s and she pulls Karlie out of the chair. Karlie stares lovingly down into Taylor’s eyes and smiles at her, nodding.

Taylor beams back at her and leans in, wrapping her arms around Karlie’s back and placing her cheek on Karlie’s chest. 

“You smell really good,” Taylor murmurs as she moves her face a little to trail her nose across Karlie’s chest, occasionally kissing her softly. 

They sway in silence for a while before Taylor starts humming softly. Karlie feels Taylor’s warm breath on her skin and she closes her eyes, taking in the sensation and truly enjoying the moment.

Taylor’s humming grows louder and it doesn’t take long before she starts singing instead. She loosens her hold on Karlie and Karlie takes the opportunity to twirl Taylor around before bringing in her for a kiss.

“I love it when you sing for me,” she whispers as her fingers make their way underneath Taylor’s sweater, trailing up Taylor’s back. 

Soon Taylor can’t keep her voice steady anymore and a squeak escapes her when Karlie’s hand suddenly dips down into her panties, grabbing a butt cheek and squeezing it teasingly. 

Taylor stares directly into Karlie’s eyes and holds Karlie’s gaze, daring her to move her hand while she licks her lips sweetly. Karlie just grins back and lets her fingers trace around Taylor’s hips, teasing her.

Suddenly Taylor lets out a throaty little growl and slips both of her hands under Karlie’s shirt, causing Karlie to remove her hand in surprise. 

“You first,” Taylor murmurs mischievously and pushes Karlie gently towards the wall behind them. Pinning her to the wall, Taylor lifts Karlie’s shirt up and presses her lips to Karlie’s stomach. A hand slips under Karlie’s bra, cupping her breast as the other wraps around her hip. Taylor’s lips travel closer and closer to the waistband on Karlie’s pants. She catches the waistband in her teeth and moves her mouth outwards an inch, only to let go of it a moment later so it smacks back onto Karlie’s skin with a jolt that makes Karlie yelp. 

Taylor is on her knees in front of Karlie now, and Karlie glances down at her. Taylor meets her gaze and winks at her while her hands fumble with Karlie’s pants, dragging them down to the floor. Once the pants are gone, her hands glide lightly across the back of Karlie’s legs, sending shivers up Karlie’s spine. A small whimper escapes Karlie’s mouth.

When Karlie wraps one of her legs around Taylor’s neck, it doesn’t take long before soft lips are caressing the insides of Karlie’s thighs. Taylor then moves and expertly uses her tongue and lips to send waves of pleasure through Karlie.

As Taylor’s mouth takes her over the edge, Karlie slowly slides down the wall towards the floor, Taylor’s arms wrapping themselves safely around her as Karlie pants into Taylor’s shoulder.

***

Hours later, Karlie steps out of the shower and wraps a towel around herself to get some protection against the cool bathroom air. She hums the Friends theme song happily as she systematically dries herself off.

Finally dry, she looks around for her favorite bottle of lotion. Realizing it must still be in one of her suitcases filled with things they brought from the Tribeca apartment, she opens the door and walks out, covering herself with her towel.

“Hey Tay,” she yells out, “you really need to try this shower, it’s better than th…”

Her voice trails off into silence when she realizes Taylor’s on the phone. She sits on the side of the bed, facing away from Karlie as she mutters quietly into the phone.

Not wanting to disturb her conversation, Karlie quickly searches through the contents of her suitcase and finds the lotion, bringing it back into the bathroom, giving Taylor some privacy.

It doesn’t take long before Taylor walks through the bathroom door. 

Karlie has just pulled a t-shirt over her head when Taylor walks in, tears streaming down her face. She buries her face in Karlie’s shirt, shaking from silent sobs that ripple through her body.

Karlie holds her close and strokes her hair, giving Taylor some time to collect her thoughts. “Babe,” she whispers, placing a kiss on Taylor’s forehead. “What’s wrong? Who was that on the phone?”

Taylor takes a deep breath before answering. “That was Emily,” she croaks and looks up at Karlie with tears in her eyes. “Her mom just passed. I… just…” She presses her face into Karlie’s chest again, taking a deep breath.

“I’m so sorry, baby,” Karlie says, her voice warm and comforting. She wants to ask for details but knows Taylor will give them freely to her once she’s processed the information a bit more.

They stand in silence with their arms wrapped tightly around each other while Taylor calms down. Eventually she dries her tears on her sleeve and looks up at Karlie, her eyes red and bloodshot. 

“I’m sorry,” she mumbles meekly.

“Don’t apologize,” Karlie says soothingly, “it’s only natural for you to grieve; she was important to you once.” She places a soft hand on Taylor’s tear-wet cheek, caressing her. “When did she pass?”

“Em said it happened this morning. Apparently it was all very peaceful, almost like she just went to sleep.” Looking away for a second, she clears her throat. “The funeral’s in two days, just outside of Nashville. Em wants me to be there. Is…” She pauses, looking uncertain for a moment. “Is that okay with you?”

“Babe,” Karlie exclaims, “of course that’s okay with me. Why wouldn’t it be?”

“I just know you weren’t really happy when we caught up back in August, and I don’t know… I guess I just wanted to check with you first.”

“Oh, don’t worry about that, princess. I’m more than fine with you going to this – not only would I be a terrible girlfriend if I wasn’t, I’d also be a terrible person.” She locks eyes with Taylor and smiles reassuringly at her. “I can take a few days off if you want me to come along?”

A small smile spreads on Taylor’s face as she nods slowly. “I was hoping you would say that because I don’t want to go alone.”

“I would never make you go through something like that alone.” Tucking a strand of hair behind Taylor’s ear, Karlie leans in to give her a soft kiss. “If Emily’s up for it, maybe it’s time for me to get to know her. Maybe we could go for dinner or something, once things have settled down a little.”

“I’m sure she would like that,” Taylor says and embraces Karlie again, giving her a good squeeze. “Thank you for being so wonderful.”

Karlie smiles to herself as she kisses Taylor’s hair. “You’re my girl: you deserve the very best.”

***

It is already dark outside when their jet lands outside of Nashville the following night. 

Their flight was calm and quiet, but the closer they got to Nashville, the more Karlie could notice Taylor growing sullen and withdrawn, seemingly lost in her own thoughts.

Stepping out onto the tarmac, Karlie looks up at the sky. “It’s such a clear night tonight,” she says quietly, hoping Taylor would notice, but she gets no reply. Instead Taylor just crawls into the backseat of the large SUV that is waiting for them. Sighing, Karlie crawls in next to her.

As the car moves further and further away from the jet, Karlie glances over at Taylor. There’s a slight frown on Taylor’s face, a worrying look that Karlie hasn’t seen for a while and she grabs hold of Taylor’s hand, squeezing it lightly.

“Babe,” she says without getting any response. “Taylor!” she tries again, waving her hand in front of Taylor’s face to get her attention.

Slowly Taylor turns towards her, her eyes focusing on Karlie’s face. 

“Are you okay?” Karlie’s voice is soft and full of concern.

“Not really,” Taylor replies, looking out the window again. 

Before Karlie can reply, she sighs and looks back at Karlie again. There’s a glimmer of hope in her eyes as she asks “Do you want to go stargazing? Like, right now?”

A small smile spreads on Karlie’s face as she nods. “The weather is perfect for it, so sure, but Tay…?”

“I’ll tell you later, I promise,” Taylor says before she lets the guys in the front know about the change of plans.

She guides them along roads she grew familiar with as a teenager, giving directions of lefts and rights and ‘turn here’s onto lonely, dark roads until they finally reach a secluded clearing away from the city lights.

Taylor immediately roams around the inside of the car to collect a few things they need: a blanket, her coat, a flashlight, and her phone.

“You should get your coat out too; it’s going to be chilly out there and I don’t want you to get cold.”

Doing as she’s told, Karlie puts on her jacket and joins Taylor outside of their car.

“I found this in the trunk,” Bruce says and hands Karlie a second blanket. “I knew we had more than one with us in the car. I’ll go with you and keep watch for you while Kevin will stay here with the car.”

“What about you? Won’t you get cold?” Karlie asks, feeling guilty the two of them are hogging both the blankets.

“Thank you for the concern, miss Kloss, but I’ll be fine,” Bruce says with a wink, looking from Karlie to Taylor. “Show us the way?”

***

They sit in each other’s arms in a serene silence while Bruce keeps watch a few yards away, giving them privacy. Karlie’s back is up against a boulder and Taylor is sitting in between her legs, resting the back of her head on Karlie’s chest, one blanket underneath them on the damp ground and the other tucked around them all the way up to Taylor’s neck.

Taylor is clearly watching the stars but Karlie is watching Taylor more than the beautiful, clear sky above them. She smiles to herself as she lovingly studies Taylor’s smooth skin, the angle of her cheekbones and the roundness of her ear. She takes a deep breath and savors the scents brought to her: Taylor’s perfume mixed perfectly with the smell of her shampoo, underlined by the dampness of the mossy ground. All the while her mind is wandering, wondering what Taylor is really feeling, but she knows Taylor will tell her and she doesn’t have to wait long before Taylor speaks.

“I’m nervous for tomorrow,” she says so quietly Karlie can barely hear it. Her voice breaks to a whisper in places and Karlie squeezes her lovingly before she kisses the top of her head. 

“Being back here for this, the funeral, it just brings back so many of those thoughts I had back when…” her voice trails off, like she doesn’t dare say the words out loud just in case, and she takes a deep breath. “I just can’t imagine what it must be like for her. It was hard enough to go visit Robin back in August, to see what Emily was going through then, how hard she fought to not break down. I keep thinking “what if it was me? What if I was going through this?” I wouldn’t have been able to deal with it. I keep imagining what it’s like to be her right now and I don’t want to.”

She turns her head to look up at Karlie, and Karlie sees the tears that are running down her face. She sits up a little straighter and leans down to kiss the tears away. 

“I think it’s understandable that you feel that way,” she says softly, “and it’s a very natural reaction. I know you’ve done well with processing all of that fear you had back then, but it’s always going to be a sore spot, you’re always going to be afraid to be alone one day. But if that happens sooner than you expect, you won’t be alone. You’ll have me, I promise I won’t leave you.”

“You can’t promise that, not really.”

“Maybe not but if I have a say in the matter, that’s what I’m promising you.”

Taylor sits up a little, creating a gap between her and Karlie where cool air rushes in, giving Karlie goosebumps. She glances at Karlie, a thoughtful look on her face, but keeps her thoughts to herself. Karlie pulls her gently back and snuggles her, their fingers intertwining again under the blanket. 

“Is there anything I can do to help you feel better?” she murmurs softly into Taylor’s ear.

Taylor shakes her head slightly. “Just hold me,” she whispers and Karlie does, knowing there is nothing else she would rather do for the rest of her life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know if you know about NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month) but that starts on Tuesday. I have a new project planned for it, original fiction, that I've been plannig for like 4 months and I'm SUPER excited to start writing it. I haven't yet decided if I will include fic writing in November or not, it really depends on how quickly I get stuff written for my book, so if I don't get a new chapter out until December, forgive me.


	41. Chapter 40

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Thanks for waiting for the update. Hope you'll like it!

If anyone is questioning why Taylor Swift is sitting in the fourth row with her girlfriend’s arm around her and two security guards sitting on either side of them at Robin Poe’s funeral, they don’t say anything out loud. In fact, no one says a single word about them until everyone in the procession is following the hearse down to the cemetery to put her body to rest. 

Karlie can feel everyone staring at them where they walk hand in hand, clad in black. They look as anonymous as they can, trying not to stand out and draw attention to themselves, trying to prevent stealing the attention away from the reason they’re there, but it’s futile.

“What’s Taylor Swift doing here?” someone asks softly behind them, clearly not intending for Karlie and Taylor to hear them, but the wind brings the words to Karlie’s ears and she turns slightly to look around. 

She doesn’t know who said the words out loud and she doesn’t want to look like she’s searching for any potentially red faces in the midst of the funeral procession, so she pretends she was just looking at the sky instead. It’s a beautiful day outside, with only a few clouds scattered across the blue sky.

Karlie turns her head to look at Taylor, who seems to not have picked up on the comment from the people behind them. She’s red and bleary-eyed and her cheeks have faint lines on them from tears that fell during the ceremony. Karlie throws her arm around Taylor’s back and pulls her close to her, giving her a kiss on the forehead as they slowly continue walking.

They stand in the back of the crowd as the funeral continues outside. Karlie stands right behind Taylor, her arms wrapped lovingly around Taylor’s waist as the pastor says a few words. Behind them Taylor’s security guards are giving the crowd some space, watching them closely from a few yards away. Around them, people stand in silence only interrupted by the gusts of wind and the sniffling coming from the grieving people around them.

Karlie snuggles close to Taylor as Emily and her daughter place flowers onto the casket. It marks the end of the ceremony and people start scattering – some go back to the church and some head towards the parking lot. Karlie and Taylor stay behind for a while, avoiding most of the crowd.

After a few minutes, Emily walks up to them holding her daughter’s hand.

“Thank you so much for coming,” she says quietly and hugs Taylor tightly before looking down at her daughter, shaking her little arm gently. “This is Madison,” she says and smiles at Taylor. 

“Hi Madison,” Taylor says, “it’s very lovely to meet you!” She looks back at Emily and returns the smile. “I wouldn’t have missed it for the world,” she says quietly, tears glistening in her eyes. “Your mother meant a lot to me.”

“You meant a lot to her too,” Emily replies, her eyes looking as glossy as Taylor’s. “Are you guys staying for a while? Have some food with us?”

“I don’t think so,” Taylor says gently, “we don’t want to impose and I know that if I stay, the focus will just shift to me instead of your mom and that’s not fair to her memory.”

“I guess you have a point,” Emily says and sighs. 

“Maybe once things are back to normal again, we could have dinner? Then you two can get to know each other a little,” Taylor suggests and looks lovingly from Karlie to Emily and back to Karlie again.

“I would really like that,” Karlie chimes in and smiles at Emily.

“That sounds good,” Emily says and returns the smile. “I’ll call you and we can figure something out. Do you know how long you’re staying?”

“We actually haven’t planned that far ahead yet, but I’m sure we can manage to find a day. If we’re back in New York we can always just fly back here for dinner.”

“It must be nice to have jets that can take you wherever you want whenever you want,” Emily chuckles. “We should head back to the church, but thank you again for coming.” She leans in and embraces Taylor in another hug. Breaking it, she turns and takes Karlie’s hand and thanks her as well before she slowly makes her way back to the church with her daughter, leaving Taylor and Karlie behind in the now-empty graveyard.

***

It doesn’t take long before Emily calls. It hasn’t even been 24 hours before Taylor’s phone chimes and she picks it up, turning it on speaker immediately.

“Hey, you’re on speaker,” she says loudly.

“Hi, this is Emily,” Emily says, sounding uncertain, “is this a bad time?”

“No, absolutely not,” Taylor says happily, “we’re just in the middle of something, hence the speaker.”

What Taylor doesn’t mention is that both her and Karlie are on all fours on the floor, trying to clean up the blue nail polish that is now scattered out all over the floor after Taylor accidentally knocked it over and Olivia ran right through it, having been spooked by the ruckus.

“I can call back later?” Emily suggests, but Taylor isn’t having it.

“No, no, no, it’s fine. Really! What’s up? How are you feeling?”

“Okay, I guess,” Emily shrugs, “in a way it feels good that it’s finally over, but…”

“It makes you feel a little empty?”

“Yeah…” Emily sighs.

Taylor looks at Karlie with a sad face, and Karlie mirrors it. She feels bad for Emily but doesn’t want to butt into the conversation, even though they are on speaker and she can hear everything. 

Taylor suddenly smiles at her, her eyes dancing happily from an idea she just got, and it seems like the idea is exactly the same as the one running through Karlie’s own head right now.

“Hey, do you have plans today?” Taylor asks, winking at Karlie.

“Not really,” Emily answers, “why?”

“We were thinking maybe you would like to come over? I know we talked about having dinner, but why not make it into a girl’s night or something?”

“Are you sure?” Emily drags the words out, like she’s trying to decide if this is a good idea or not. “But won’t it…”

“Of course we’re sure, right Karlie?” She glances as Karlie and mouths something while nodding her head encouragingly. 

“Yeah, we’re sure,” Karlie chimes in and sticks her tongue out at Taylor. Doesn’t the girl know she’s already on board?

When Emily still hesitates, Taylor brings out the reassuring words. “Come on, Em,” she says, “it will be fun! We can make dinner, and I’m sure Karlie can bake something…”

“I can,” Karlie interrupts.

“…and we can just chat for a while or watch a movie or play a game. We’re up for anything, really! Why not do it today, you know? It sounds like you might need it.”

“Yeah, okay,” Emily agrees at last. “What time should I come over?”

“If you stop by at like 6-ish, then I think everything should be ready.”

“Okay. I’ll see you then!”

As soon as they hang up, Taylor looks wide eyed around the room. “I think we have to hurry if we’re going to get this cleaned up and make dinner and bake before 6pm.”

Karlie crawls close to her and kisses her lightly on the nose. “If you want, I can deal with the clean-up and you can plan dinner.”

“No,” Taylor says and shakes her head lightly, “I think it will go faster if we both clean. Why don’t you just deal with this huge stain and I’ll deal with the paw prints?”

“Sounds like a deal,” Karlie says and gives Taylor another peck, this time on the lips. “Off you go then, shoo,” she says and waves her arm at Taylor, who follows the paw prints all the way to the end of the room and into the kitchen while she laughs at Karlie.

***

“Will you please relax?” Taylor places her hands on Karlie’s shoulders and holds her still in front of her, staring lovingly into her eyes. “You’ve been pacing for thirty minutes.”

“I’m just nervous!” Karlie forces her gaze away from Taylor’s and looks over at the pan of brownies that are getting ready in the oven. She put them in fifteen minutes ago and wishes they could be ready for consumption before Emily is due to arrive in the next ten minutes. Some chocolate is always the solution to calming her nerves.

“Why? You met her yesterday!” Taylor’s fingers trail down Karlie’s arms, grabbing onto her hands as she pulls her close for a quick kiss.

“Yeah, but that was different,” Karlie says and sighs, “We didn’t really speak yesterday. What if she doesn’t like me? What if she thinks I’m terrible for you?”

“Stop it, silly,” Taylor murmurs and presses her cheek into Karlie’s shoulder. “She adores you already.”

The doorbell rings only a minute after and Taylor sends Karlie out to open the door. “Go,” she says, “it’ll give you a good opportunity to get to know her a little better right away.”

Her heart is in her throat when she walks to the door and opens it. Emily is smiling at her when she opens the door. 

“Hi,” Emily says softly, one of her hands resting on her stomach.

“Hi!” Karlie says enthusiastically, “please, come on in! Can I take your coat?”

“Sure, thank you.” 

Karlie’s palms are sweaty with nerves as she takes Emily’s coat and puts it onto a hanger in the closet. “Taylor’s just in the kitchen,” she says, trying to make some small talk and failing miserably. “Dinner should be ready soon.”

“It smells lovely,” Emily says, “what have you made?”

“Taylor’s made an entire feast,” Karlie chuckles, “so I really hope you’re hungry. I made brownies though, for dessert.”

“Oh, yeah,” Emily says and lights up, “Taylor told me you’re a baker.”

“She did?” Karlie feels herself blush a light shade of crimson.

“Yeah! You should have heard her gushing about you. She really loves you, you know?”

“That feeling is definitely mutual,” Karlie murmurs, unable to keep a smile off her face. She gestures to the door leading to the living room. “Shall we?”

Taylor joins them in the living room, bringing them all glasses of diet coke. “We have other things if you’d rather have something else,” she kindly tells Emily.

“No, this is fine, thank you.”

Taylor hands a glass to Karlie before sitting down next to her on the couch. Karlie automatically puts her arm around Taylor, holding her close. 

“So how are you doing?” Taylor asks Emily. The woman sitting opposite them looks tired, and it is obvious to Karlie that yesterday must have required more energy than she had to spare, and now she’s paying for it.

“Alright, I think,” Emily says slowly, “it’s been a long week. At least I get to relax tonight. Brad’s really great, he realized I needed a break today and offered to take the day off work so he could spend it with Madison and let me have some me-time.”

“He sounds like a good guy,” Taylor says, “I’m glad you have him.”

“I am too.”

The timer goes off in the kitchen and a faint beeping reaches their ears. Taylor gets up from the couch and hurries to the kitchen to deal with their dinner, leaving Karlie and Emily in a somewhat awkward silence.  
“So you’re a lawyer, right?” Karlie asks, breaking it.

“I am.”

“If I may ask, what made you take the leap from being Taylor’s fiddle player to becoming a lawyer? They are kind of far apart as far as career choices go.”

Emily chuckles at the question. “Yeah, you’re right about that.” She looks down at her hands for a second before meeting Karlie’s gaze again. “I guess, once I had to stop playing for Taylor, it just wasn’t the same anymore. I still have the passion for it, I take it out every now and then to play, just for myself and sometimes I play for Madison, but it just didn’t feel right to start playing for someone else.”

“That makes sense. Why law though? Why not something else?”

“Ever since I was little, I knew I wanted to do something involving the justice system. Being a lawyer sounded really cool up until I was a teenager and discovered that I was actually really good at playing the fiddle. I guess once it became clear I wouldn’t be able to continue playing for Taylor, that childhood dream came trickling back. I’ve never regretted that decision.” 

“I’m glad you’ve found something else to be passionate about,” Karlie says and smiles.

“I see you have too, though,” Emily says enthusiastically, “how did you realize your passion for coding?”

“Josh, my… I almost wanted to say boyfriend there, but he never was my boyfriend,” Karlie starts and stops herself, laughing nervously. “Let me try that again,” she chuckles, “my best friend Josh got me into it. He attended some coding classes and showed me what it was all about. I was fascinated by it straight away and knew I had to act upon that fascination right away.”

The awkward silence that was present earlier is entirely gone now that they’re chatting away like a couple of old friends. In fact, they’re so engaged in conversation that neither of them notices that Taylor is watching them quietly from the doorway with a cat in her arms and a huge smile on her face before turning her back to them and going back to the kitchen.


	42. Chapter 41

It’s early in the morning on Taylor’s birthday and Karlie is already awake. Just for a moment, she considers rolling out of bed to feed the cats, but instead she pulls herself closer to Taylor and carefully wraps her free arm around her girlfriend, spooning her gently. Taylor is fast asleep, not even stirring once as Karlie puts her soft lips on Taylor’s shoulder, giving her a gentle kiss. 

It’s only a couple of minutes past six, but Karlie knows she needs to get out of bed soon if she’s going to avoid being late for her morning workout. Allowing herself to lie there for a couple more minutes, she relaxes and gazes lovingly at her sleeping girlfriend. The sound of Taylor’s breathing is calming, peaceful, and it makes getting out of bed very difficult. 

When the clock hits ten past six, she slowly untangles herself and gets out of bed. She picks up a robe from the chair next to the bed and puts it on while looking around the room. It’s hard to believe it’s already been a year since Taylor told her she wanted to go public. Just thinking of how far they’ve come in just one short year makes Karlie smile to herself as she makes her way to the bathroom to shower.

They arrived in Los Angeles only the night before. It was Karlie’s idea to have Taylor’s birthday party in LA, insisting it was the best place for it since most of their friends were already there. Karlie had to go there for work anyway, claiming she had an interview scheduled with an up-and-coming computer science magazine. In reality, there is no interview – she just really wants to be in LA for Taylor’s birthday. She has a plan and the location is important. 

Warm from the shower, Karlie walks back into the bedroom and smiles at the sight of Taylor lying sprawled out on the bed, on her back with one arm hanging off the side of the bed, the blanket only covering a portion of her naked body. Olivia has curled herself into a ball right by Taylor’s hip and raises her head for a moment to stare at Karlie before she puts it back down on the mattress to snooze a little more.

She gets dressed in the dim light from the open bathroom door. When she finishes, she pulls her hair back in a tight bun before sitting down on the side of the bed. She drags her fingers up Taylor’s side, from her hip all the way to her shoulder, before she taps her lightly on the arm. “Babe,” she says, “Taylor, wake up.” The words singsong sweetly out of her and eventually Taylor stirs, grunting softly. 

“What?” Taylor mumbles and turns over on her side, facing Karlie.

Karlie chuckles softly and strokes Taylor’s hair. “Good morning, sweetheart, and happy birthday.” She leans in and puts her soft lips on Taylor’s, giving her a tender kiss. 

“What time is it?”

“It’s almost seven. You don’t have to get up but I have to go and I wanted to say hi before I go.”

“Hi,” Taylor whispers and smiles contentedly, her fingers brushing lightly across Karlie’s arm. “Are you really going to be at work all day and leave me all alone on my birthday?” She puts on a playful pout that makes Karlie laugh.

“You won’t be alone all day, silly. Last thing I heard, you were spending the day with Lily and Dixie. Besides, I’ll see you tonight for the party. I’ll be home early enough to decorate the house.”

“I know, I’m just teasing you,” Taylor purrs happily. 

“I should go,” Karlie says, “don’t want to be late.”

“Can you feed the cats before you go?”

“I will.” She leans in for another kiss before she gets up and walks to the door. Looking back, she sees that Taylor has already turned around and closed her eyes. “I’ll see you tonight. I love you.” 

“Love you too,” Taylor mumbles back without opening her eyes again. “Leave the door open for the cats.”

Karlie chuckles to herself and does as she’s told, leaving the sleeping, quiet house a few minutes later. 

***

“Do you know where you’re taking her today?” Karlie asks. She’s in the back seat of an Uber, talking to Lily on the phone, having finished her workout early for once. “I really need for you to keep her out of the house until tonight.”

“I know, I got the message the first time,” Lily teases before continuing. “I was thinking we could go to Disneyland again. Dixie has been asking if we can go there again with Auntie Taylor. I think she really enjoyed it last time.”

“Yeah, Taylor talked about that visit for days. I don’t know who had more fun, Dixie or her,” Karlie laughs loudly, “She definitely won’t mind going back for the day.”

“Alright,” Lily says happily, “I’ll let Dixie know, she’ll be thrilled.”

“Give her a kiss from me, alright? And have Taylor back by six. Not…”

“Not a minute earlier,” Lily interrupts, “I know, you’ve told me like five times already.”

“Sorry,” Karlie says and grins to herself, “it’s just important, is all.”

“I know. Now go, do your secret business and I’ll see you tonight.”

They hang up and Karlie leans back in her seat, looking out the window. A smile spreads across her face as she thinks about tonight. Taylor won’t have any idea what is coming. Karlie herself didn’t even come up with the plan until a few weeks ago and now, sitting in the back seat of a car on her way to the airport to pick up her older sister, she can feel butterflies in her stomach. She’s actually going through with this. If anyone had asked her a year ago if she would be on her way to pick up a ring to surprise Taylor with at the party later, she would have laughed in their face. It’s almost surreal how well this year has gone, how every single piece of the puzzle has just fallen into place and they’re finally at a place where she can actually propose to her girl in front of all of her friends.

She’s so lost in thought that she doesn’t realize the car has come to a halt. The driver clears his throat a few times and she stares blankly at him, wondering what he wants. 

“We’re here, miss?” 

“Oh,” Karlie exclaims, glancing out the window and realizing she’s been sitting there lost in thought. “I must have zoned out.” She flashes the driver a sheepish smile before jumping out of the car.

It takes fifteen minutes of anxious waiting in the arrivals hall before Kristine appears behind a family of four talking excitedly amongst themselves. She grins at her younger sister and drops her bag onto the ground in between her legs while giving Karlie a big hug.

“Thank you so much for coming,” Karlie says happily, “it’s really good to see you.”

“As if I would let my little sister propose without witnessing it.”

“I can’t believe I’m doing this.”

“I kind of can’t believe it either,” Kristine laughs and grabs her bag from the floor. “But I’m really glad you are. We should go though, we have a lot of things to do to get everything ready.”

***

It’s almost a quarter to six in the evening when Karlie is standing in the doorway by the dining room, looking into the perfectly decorated living room. She knows the guests are just around the corner, but her stomach is full of butterflies and she has to take a moment to admire the work they’ve put into decorating the place, making sure it’s absolutely perfect. Her eyes slowly glide across the dimly lit room. There are flowers on the table, black, white and silver balloons hanging in every corner, and a ‘happy birthday’ banner hanging across the top of the window on the back wall. On a chair by the door leading out into the patio, a large stack of white candles is placed, waiting for all the guests to arrive.

Kristine walks out of the kitchen carrying yet another bowl of snacks and puts it down on the dining room table. “That should be the last bowl,” she says and regards the table, looking pleased. “We’ve done a good job here. I think we can likely feed a small army.” 

When Karlie just smiles without replying, Kristine walks over to her and gives her a sideways hug. “You’re nervous, aren’t you?”

“Yeah,” Karlie admits, “a little.”

“You’ll do great,” Kristine says and gives Karlie a good squeeze.

“I really hope so,” Karlie says and turns around to look at her older sister. “It’s just… Taylor’s the one who is good with words. I want this to be perfect and I just hope I won’t mess it all up.”

They are interrupted by a knock on the door and Karlie hurries to let in the first guests. 

“You’ll be fine,” Kristine yells after her right before the door opens and a whole group of Taylor’s friends flock in.

In a matter of minutes the living room fills up with friends and family, all of them gushing about how great the night will be, hugging Karlie and wishing her luck. Her phone finally chimes with a text from Lily, saying they’re about five minutes away, and Karlie can feel her heart thump a little bit faster as she ushers everyone outside. Inside the living room, Kristine lights the candles that are meant to lead Taylor through the living room and outside to the patio. 

“Guys, listen up!” Karlie’s voice shakes a little as she gets the attention of everyone present. “I’ll be giving out one candle to everyone right now. Taylor will be here in less than five minutes so please, hurry up and light your candles and then stand behind me like this.” She quickly gestures a half-circle with her hand. 

The guests talk excitedly amongst themselves in hushed tones as they follow the instructions and soon they all stand behind Karlie as tightly as they can while keeping the candles at a safe distance from each other. Karlie can feel her heart race again as they wait. The last few minutes feel like several eternities and she shuffles nervously where she stands, feeling the heaviness of the tiny little box hidden in her right pocket. 

She watches the candles flicker in the winter breeze before leaning close to Kristine. “You remembered to lock the cats in the bedroom before lighting all the candles, right?”

“Karlie,” Kristine chuckles, “you put them in there when you got changed.”

“Oh.”

“Good thing you’re not doing this every day,” Ella laughs, poking Karlie in the back with her elbow, “those two darlings would die from starvation or something.”

“Stop it,” Karlie chuckles, “I’m not that bad.”

“I think they’re here,” Kristine suddenly whispers and the hushed conversation happening amongst them dies down. 

From inside the house, they can hear Taylor’s confused voice as she walks through the house with Lily in tow. “What is all this?”

Karlie can barely keep her breath steady as Taylor walks out the door from the house. Her stomach is full of butterflies and when Taylor looks lovingly at her, with Lily trying to keep her giggles quiet in the background, Karlie feels like she’s about to rip into a million pieces. 

“Karlie,” Taylor purrs, “what’s all this?” She glances happily at her friends, her eyes darting from Karlie to the candles to the excited faces of the people surrounding them. 

Karlie takes a small step forwards and swallows nervously. She takes Taylor’s hand and leads it up to her face, kissing it softly before she takes a deep breath. “You know, ever since that first moment when we met, I’ve known all I ever wanted was you.” She pauses to take another shaky breath, and her eyes find Taylor’s in the dim light. They’re so brilliantly blue from the candlelight surrounding them and for a moment, all Karlie can think of is how she could get lost in them forever. “It was so easy to give myself fully to you,” she continues, “to allow myself to fall so quickly and so deeply in love with you. It was unlike anything I had ever felt.”

“Is this…” Taylor whispers, but lets the sentence trail off as she smiles at Karlie, her eyes glossing over as she holds Karlie’s gaze.

Karlie nods softly and laughs a little before she continues. “This relationship has survived so much – our hectic schedules, Adam, a literal car crash, stalkers and fangirls and fights. If anyone had asked me a year ago what I would be doing today, I certainly wouldn't have said _this_ , but all of it has just proven to me how much I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I’m so proud of everything you do - the way you hold yourself up, the way you stick up for others, the way you make me a better person. My entire life is brighter with you in it and I don’t ever want to go back into the dark.” 

She pauses again, taking a small step backwards as she fumbles with the little box in her pocket. A small sigh slips out of her as she smiles happily at Taylor before she continues. “You are the love of my life, Taylor, and I absolute love being yours. We’ve come such a long way this year, so I thought it was only fitting that I would do this here, in this city, in this house, on this day, surrounded by all of these people. So, Taylor,” she takes the box out of her pocket and gets down on one knee, “will you marry me?”

Taylor stares at the ring with wide eyes. It’s a beautiful rose gold piece, with intricate details on the sides and a beautiful rock in the middle. Slowly Taylor nods as a grin spreads on her face. A few tears run down her face as she whispers “yes” and gives Karlie a long kiss. 

The crowd surrounding them is whispering quietly as Karlie starts putting the ring on Taylor’s finger. “Wait,” Taylor says, pulling away “wait here. I’ll be right back.” She turns on her heel and rushes back into the house. It only takes a moment before she comes rushing back out, a huge grin on her face and a small jewelry box in her hand. She kisses Karlie again before she opens it, revealing a simple, but elegant white gold ring. “I bought it a few weeks back,” she murmurs, “planned on proposing to you on Christmas Day, surrounded by your family, but I guess this will do too.” She winks and gently pushes the ring onto Karlie’s finger.

“It’s beautiful,” Karlie says and stares at it in awe for a moment.

“Karlie…?” Taylor asks, poking her slightly. 

“What?” Karlie drags her eyes away from the ring to look at Taylor, who holds out her own hand. “Oh! Of course.” She grins from ear to ear as she pushes the beautiful rose gold ring onto Taylor’s finger, and for a moment she stands there admiring what a good choice she made. Leaning in to give Taylor another kiss, she murmurs “Happy birthday, baby,” into her ear.

Eventually they break apart from their embrace and turn to face the crowd. Their friends’ cheers are a cacophony of happiness and Karlie can feel herself blush a little from it all. 

“Alright guys, blow out your candles. Let’s go have some cake!”

***

Hours later, Taylor is sitting on Karlie’s lap in a chair in the living room. Her head is resting on Karlie’s shoulder and Karlie’s arm is wrapped protectively around Taylor’s waist. Their almost empty wine glasses are sitting on the table in front of them and across the room, the Haim sisters are performing an intimate and spontaneous birthday duet with Ella. 

In the middle of a beautiful acoustic cover of James Taylor’s _You Can Close Your Eyes_ , Taylor sits up a little straighter and looks at Karlie. She brushes a finger slowly across Karlie’s lips before she gives her a kiss, resting her nose against Karlie’s for a moment.

“I’m really glad you are, you know,” she murmurs so quietly Karlie can barely hear it.

“What?”

“Mine.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GUYS!
> 
> I promised you a much longer fic, but my inspiration has wavered for a long while. It's taken me three months just to get this chapter out and for that I apologize. While I hope my inspiration will come back, I wanted to give this an ending that actually works as an ending while keeping the possibility open for continuing if I ever get inspired to write the rest.
> 
> Thank you so much for reading this fic. I hope one day I will come back with more Kaylor for you guys to read.  
> Thank you for giving me kudos and comments and such wonderful feedback. You guys are awesome.


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